Essential Healing
138 episodes - English - Latest episode: over 3 years ago - ★★★★★ - 2 ratingsWelcome to Essential Healing.
As human beings, we're designed to learn through experience. We explore, test, watch others and take what we notice to form not only our beliefs about ourselves, but also of others and the world around us.
Similar to following an outline, this information gets stored in our subconscious as a thought pattern and becomes a part of the unconscious beliefs we use to navigate every aspect of our life.
And because they're unconscious (by design), often we have no idea what they are.
Some of the beliefs or patterns are helpful and positive, such as "I need to stay back from the edge of that cliff," or "I'm confident that I can pass that test with flying colors."
But others create patterns of resistance, such as, "I'm no good at Math," "I NEVER win," or "I don't have what it takes."
If you've ever tried to overcome these beliefs by negotiating with yourself (such as affirming I DO HAVE WHAT IT TAKES!), and you felt like it wasn't working, you're NOT alone. The subconscious is steadfast, and it doesn't like to LOSE.
Trauma adds another level of complexity to this internal war because as a result of the experiences we've had, we feel like there's something fundamentally wrong with US. We don't trust ourselves to know right from wrong, what works for us and what doesn't, or that we have the power to break the cycle.
Fortunately, there's another way.
Join Dawn Petek and guests as they shed light on the truth of how the toxic legacy of the past shows up in your daily life and provide you with the skills you need to THRIVE.
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Episodes
The Power Is In The Tools
December 31, 2019 12:49 - 8 minutes - 15.6 MBTHE POWER IS IN THE TOOLS Sometimes we get so focused on trying to logic our way through things, that we’re unwilling to bring something into our inner world to help us solve it. We think we need to just push our way through it… alone. The truth is, we’re STRONGER with our tools. (Watch Video) ….. [Essential Healing - Episode 35] #essentialhealing
To Move Forward, You Have To Get Unstuck
December 26, 2019 19:33 - 6 minutes - 13.1 MBTO MOVE FORWARD, YOU HAVE TO GET UNSTUCK We focus so much on the fact that we’re stuck because we can’t move forward, that we don’t realize that the REASON we’re not moving forward is because we’re stuck. You might be thinking, "Aren’t those the same thing?" To a certain degree, yes. It’s an example where I could say the result is the same… it’s 6 and 1/2 dozen of the other. In this case, it’s a matter of different mindsets. Here’s why… (Watch Video) ….. [Essential...
The First Answer Isn't Always The Right One
December 24, 2019 15:40 - 8 minutes - 15.6 MBTHE FIRST ANSWER ISN’T ALWAYS THE RIGHT ONE It’s natural to make a quick judgement when you meet someone, it’s one of our basic instincts. We automatically assess every situation we’re in to see if it’s safe, including people AND their behavior. Here’s why quick assessments might not be the whole picture… (Watch Video) ….. [Essential Healing - Episode 33] #essentialhealing
If It Isn't There, Look Somewhere Else
December 19, 2019 23:51 - 24 minutes - 29.5 MBIF IT ISN’T THERE, LOOK SOMEWHERE ELSE Experiencing Trauma adds another layer of complexity to our view of ourselves and the world around us. Because of this complexity, it can be difficult to figure out exactly where our emotions are coming from (and where they started). This can leave us stuck looking in the wrong place. (Watch Video) ….. [Essential Healing - Episode 32] #essentialhealing
Learning Is Messy
December 17, 2019 13:30 - 15 minutes - 21.3 MBLEARNING IS MESSY Often times we avoid our healing because we think it’s going to be messy. What we need to realize is that while healing IS messy, learning to heal is messier. Here’s how to embrace the mess… (Watch Video) ….. [Essential Healing - Episode 31] #essentialhealing
If It's On The Outside, It's On The Inside
December 12, 2019 14:07 - 22 minutes - 28.4 MBIF IT’S ON THE OUTSIDE, IT’S ON THE INSIDE When we see something that we don’t like about someone else, our instinct is to either shut them down or go on the defense. We may feel angry about it, continuously ruminate about it, try to justify it, or we fight against them. And, we may deliberately try to push them away. The problem is, we get so stuck in the intensity of it, we don’t see the truth about why we’re upset. (Watch Video) ….. [Essential Healing - Episode 30] #...
Signs Point In More Than One Direction
December 10, 2019 15:19 - 11 minutes - 18.4 MBSIGNS POINT IN MORE THAN ONE DIRECTION When we feel like we have an instant connection with someone we meet, it can feel like we’ve known them for years. We feel drawn to them, like the Universe is pointing us in the "right" direction. Here’s why the sign might not be pointing in the direction you think it is. (Watch Video) ….. [Essential Healing - Episode 29] #essentialhealing
SIGNS POINT IN MORE THAN ONE DIRECTION
December 10, 2019 15:19 - 11 minutes - 18.4 MBSIGNS POINT IN MORE THAN ONE DIRECTION When we feel like we have an instant connection with someone we meet, it can feel like we’ve known them for years. We feel drawn to them, like the Universe is pointing us in the "right" direction. Here’s why the sign might not be pointing in the direction you think it is. (Watch Video) ….. [Essential Healing - Episode 29] #essentialhealing
It's The Small Things That Trip Us Up The Most
December 06, 2019 13:28 - 13 minutes - 20.3 MBIT’S THE SMALL THINGS THAT TRIP US UP THE MOST Usually, I keep myself fairly grounded. I’ve done a lot of work in my healing journey. There aren’t as many things that are trigger me these days. And I know what to look for when it comes to the things that do. But last week, I hit the dirt. I wasn’t doing the things that I needed to stay grounded, I missed the signals of a few triggers because I told myself they were "no big deal," and I because I was feeling great beforehand, t...
Healing Is A Journey. Staying Healthy Is A Practice.
December 03, 2019 21:04 - 16 minutes - 22.8 MBHEALING IS A JOURNEY. STAYING HEALTHY IS A PRACTICE. When we start out on a healing or health journey, we don’t feel well, that’s why we do it. We’re looking to solve something. Let’s take going on a diet for example. We don’t feel well in our own skin, so we change our eating habits. Maybe we even go all out and do a detox program. After a short time, we start to feel momentum because we start to feel better. So, we keep moving forward. We start losing weight, have more energy, mor...
The Size of Small Wounds
November 28, 2019 13:28 - 8 minutes - 15.4 MBTHE SIZE OF SMALL WOUNDS If you have a wound like a paper cut on your finger, you expect it to heal quickly. It’s small. But depending on where it’s at, it can make a big impact on your daily activities AND take a long time to heal. We may think that emotional wounds are small because we can’t see them, we were told they were insignificant, or we compare them to what others have gone through. But they still stop us in our tracks. (Watch Video) ….. [Essential Healing -...
Being A Passenger On The Roller Coaster
November 26, 2019 12:50 - 13 minutes - 20 MBBEING A PASSENGER ON THE ROLLER COASTER Having someone close to you who is struggling with mental health issues can feel like you’re riding shot gun on a roller coaster ride. It’s heartbreaking to witness. And, because we’re so close to them, we not only feel our own pain, we also feel theirs. In fact, sometimes it can be difficult to tell which is which. (Watch Video) ….. [Essential Healing - Episode 25] #essentialhealing
The Nothingness
November 23, 2019 14:27 - 10 minutes - 17.3 MBTHE NOTHINGNESS Do you know that feeling when you walk into a room and you can’t remember why you were going there? In that moment, when your mind draws a blank, it can feel like you just stepped into the "nothingness." This is something that happens to us all. It’s a normal part of life, and unfortunately, some say it’s part of getting older. There are times though, where feeling like you "froze" means something else. (Watch Video) ….. [Essential Healing - Episode 24...
Life Interrupts Us To Get Us On Track
November 22, 2019 16:21 - 9 minutes - 16.1 MBLIFE INTERRUPTS US TO GET US ON TRACK When we’re in a good groove, and we get interrupted, it can be irritating. We just want to stay focused and keep forging ahead. And, once we get interrupted, it can be hard to get back "into the groove again." Here’s the question… are we supposed to? (Watch Video) ….. [Essential Healing - Episode 23] #essentialhealing
The Affirmation Battle
November 21, 2019 17:26 - 13 minutes - 19.7 MBTHE AFFIRMATION BATTLE I love the intention behind using affirmations to change our thoughts. They can help us "flip the switch" and create a swell of energy to propel us toward our goals. But the challenge is, often times, when saying an affirmation, we end up waging a war against our ego. Here’s how to make affirmations work… (Watch Video) ….. [Essential Healing - Episode 22] #essentialhealing
Space Creates Clarity
November 21, 2019 12:54 - 13 minutes - 19.6 MBSPACE CREATES CLARITY Have you ever noticed how the moment you find something is right when you stop looking for it? The reason is that often times, by the very act of us searching for something, we actually narrow our focus. It can cause us to miss something that’s right in front of us. Here’s how to keep that from happening… (Watch Video) ….. [Essential Healing - Episode 21] #essentialhealing
How Shame Holds You Back
November 19, 2019 17:59 - 13 minutes - 20.2 MBHOW SHAME HOLDS YOU BACK Throughout my healing journey, I’ve done some work around shame. I’ve dug into the trenches of the times where I felt "shamed" by others or when I walked away from a situation carrying the burden of shame. When I’m reminded of those times, I may feel shame come to the surface, which is to a degree, to be expected. I’m still healing. What I’ve been present to lately is the places where shame is showing up in my life UNEXPECTEDLY. It’s like running into ...
If It Isn’t Lining Up With You, Move
November 18, 2019 15:35 - 13 minutes - 19.4 MBIF IT ISN’T LINING UP WITH YOU, MOVE When we feel like something isn’t "lining up for us," it’s easy to come to the conclusion that it’s because something is wrong with US. We think that it must be because we’re doing something wrong, otherwise it would be working out. Then, we try to fix US, so that we’ll align with IT. Eventually, we get overwhelmed and hopeless because no matter what we try to fix within ourselves, it still doesn’t fit. The reality is, if something feels li...
What IS the Real YOU??
November 18, 2019 14:28 - 16 minutes - 22.9 MBWHAT IS THE REAL YOU?? As I started down the path of my healing journey, I’d often hear/read things such as "Just speak your truth" "You need to be the real YOU" And I’d wonder… What is my truth? Aren’t I being honest? What is the "real" me? In this episode, I talk about how learning to see the things that WEREN’T ME helped me uncover the things that WERE ME, and the true definition of Essential Healing. (Watch Video) ….. [Essential Healing - Episode 18] #essentia...
We Are The Hero In Our Own Journey
November 13, 2019 14:18 - 12 minutes - 18.7 MBWE ARE THE HERO IN OUR OWN JOURNEY As kids, all of us fantasize about being a "hero" or "heroine." As women, some of us may have (or still) fantasize about our "knight in shining armor" coming to rescue us. Growing up, imagining an alternate reality or that we have "super-powers" is a normal part of our growth. But for those of us who experienced childhood trauma, imagining a different reality was in fact, a longing to be free. Fortunately, as adults, we CAN be the hero in our...
I’ve Been Told To Just Get Over IT
November 12, 2019 18:49 - 24 minutes - 30.2 MBI’VE BEEN TOLD TO JUST GET OVER IT Sometimes our emotions feel bigger than us. Like we’re overwhelmed by them. They consume us. We may wonder why we can’t just "shut them off." But emotions in general, especially those related to trauma, don’t work that way… (Watch Video) ..... Article mentioned in this Episode: https://dawnpetek.com/from-darkness-to-light/ ….. [Essential Healing - Episode 16] #essentialhealing
Emotions Are Like Paper Mache
November 11, 2019 19:13 - 15 minutes - 21.6 MBEMOTIONS ARE LIKE PAPER MACHE If you’ve ever worked with paper mâché, you know that it involves dipping strips of paper into a thin paste and then layering the strips onto a form (such as a balloon or chicken wire). The end result is used to make sculptures such as masks, float decorations, etc. The lessons we learn in life are a little like paper mâché. We take each lesson and stick it to us like we’re creating a sculpture (and we are). The problem is, if we’re not careful, we c...
When Planning Ahead Turns Into Expectation
November 11, 2019 00:28 - 22 minutes - 28 MBWHEN PLANNING AHEAD TURNS INTO EXPECTATION Prioritizing our task list and the things we work on is one aspect of managing expectations of both ourselves and others. It can be a balancing act to be realistic about what our expectations are so don’t set ourselves up for frustration and disappointment. On the other hand, knowing what to "expect" can help us feel prepared. It’s how we make sure we have the right gear in the car when the seasons change or how we make sure we’re in the ri...
Assumptions BOMB Relationships
November 09, 2019 14:45 - 14 minutes - 20.6 MBASSUMPTIONS BOMB RELATIONSHIPS Making assumptions is natural. We use them to keep us safe from things that could harm us (like assuming a stick is a snake), and we use them to save time. For example, when we’re doing activities such as performing tasks in our jobs or cooking, etc., we’re able to get into a rhythm because we get used to the pattern, assume it will be the same each time and are able to operate on "automatic pilot." It’s what allows us to multi-task and be productive. ...
Does Healing Feel Like A Job?
November 08, 2019 14:53 - 13 minutes - 20 MBDOES HEALING FEEL LIKE A JOB? When we’re trying to heal ourselves, sometimes it can feel like "healing" has its own category in our life. Like if we were to list the different "duties" that we have (wife, mom, business owner, manager), that "healing" would get its own bullet point in the list. It can feel like having another full or part time job. Sometimes it can be overwhelming. It can also feel like it’s at the bottom of the list and we don’t have time for it. I’ve learn...
Speaking Your Truth Can Feel Like An Internal War
November 07, 2019 12:39 - 11 minutes - 17.6 MBSPEAKING YOUR TRUTH CAN FEEL LIKE AN INTERNAL WAR This post started out as a warm up video… and then I realized that what I was trying to accomplish was getting into a mindset of speaking my truth. Because as much as I try to be authentic in speaking to others, there are times when I’m "structuring" what I say because I’m trying to make a statement, prove a point, convey a particular message, or affect an outcome. And by "structuring" what I say, I feel like I’m moving myself away f...
Who Opened the Flood Gates?
November 06, 2019 14:51 - 11 minutes - 17.8 MBWHO OPENED THE FLOOD GATES? Do you ever feel like just when you start to enjoy a new sense of freedom and perspective due to a breakthrough in your healing that you get hit with another mountain to climb or the universe puts more on your plate? It can feel like "Enough already! Can’t I just enjoy the feeling of freedom and peace for a FEW minutes?!?" It can feel a little like we’re being punished, like someone just opened the flood gates to hit us with more than we bargained for. ...
In order to see what's in front of you, sometimes you have to walk backwards
November 05, 2019 20:39 - 8 minutes - 15.2 MBIN ORDER TO SEE WHAT’S IN FRONT OF YOU, SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO WALK BACKWARDS In my healing journey, I’ve realized that in order to get to a place where I feel like I’m able to move forward is when I can see something in a different light, in essence - shift my perspective. Sometimes we resist shifting our mindset in relation to our trauma because we think that it means we have to dismiss, pardon, agree with, or forget about it. In this week’s episode I talk about how the path to cla...
In Order To See What's In Front Of You, Sometimes You Have To Walk Backwards
November 05, 2019 20:39 - 8 minutes - 15.2 MBIN ORDER TO SEE WHAT’S IN FRONT OF YOU, SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO WALK BACKWARDS In my healing journey, I’ve realized that in order to get to a place where I feel like I’m able to move forward is when I can see something in a different light, in essence - shift my perspective. Sometimes we resist shifting our mindset in relation to our trauma because we think that it means we have to dismiss, pardon, agree with, or forget about it. In this week’s episode I talk about how the path to cla...
Are your emotions running high on Tuesdays?
October 29, 2019 13:40 - 16 minutes - 22.9 MBARE YOUR EMOTIONS RUNNING HIGH ON TUESDAYS? We all have times of the year where we may feel nostalgic about days of old. But if you’ve experienced a major loss or trauma, something as innocent as a calendar date can be overwhelming because it can cause emotions you thought were long gone to resurface. The problem is, if it’s something that’s in your distant past, you may not realize why you feel so emotional. Having something "unknown" impact your emotions can feel maddening. You ma...
Are Your Emotions Running High On Tuesdays?
October 29, 2019 13:40 - 16 minutes - 22.9 MBARE YOUR EMOTIONS RUNNING HIGH ON TUESDAYS? We all have times of the year where we may feel nostalgic about days of old. But if you’ve experienced a major loss or trauma, something as innocent as a calendar date can be overwhelming because it can cause emotions you thought were long gone to resurface. The problem is, if it’s something that’s in your distant past, you may not realize why you feel so emotional. Having something "unknown" impact your emotions can feel maddening. You ma...
Are You Stepping Into Someone Else’s Vortex?
October 19, 2019 20:47 - 16 minutes - 15.4 MBARE YOU STEPPING INTO SOMEONE ELSE’S VORTEX? Sometimes we can get sucked into chaos or toxicity with another person when they’re going through something in their lives, especially when they start acting in a way that triggers a trauma response in us. It can feel a little like stepping into someone else’s vortex. Fortunately, we don’t have to allow it to consume us. Here’s how… (Watch Video) ….. [Essential Healing - Episode 7] #essentialhealing
Scraping Your Knees Is Better Than Sitting Still
October 19, 2019 11:55 - 13 minutes - 12.4 MBSCRAPING YOUR KNEES IS BETTER THAN SITTING STILL Having PTSD/trauma related responses sucks. You’re just rolling along, trying to live and enjoy daily life and then all of the sudden, something you hear, see, feel, think, taste, or smell activates a trauma response. It can feel like you just hit the dirt. Here’s why feeling like you just scraped your knees and landed in the dirt means the opposite of what you think. (Watch Video) ….. [Essential Healing - Episode 6 - *Explic...
When We Get Clotheslined
October 17, 2019 21:04 - 17 minutes - 15.6 MBWHEN WE GET CLOTHESLINED As self-healers, we work really hard to heal ourselves and stay grounded and balanced. So when a comment someone makes or something we see on the news triggers/activates our trauma, it can feel a little like we just got knocked off our feet. Often times, we may not realize it’s activating a trauma response, so we get stuck in a loop of trying to figure out why this "small thing" is bothering us so much. And, it’s easy to start questioning whether we’re as fa...
Are You Stopping At A Threshold In Your Healing?
October 15, 2019 11:59 - 13 minutes - 19.6 MBARE YOU STOPPING AT A THRESHOLD IN YOUR HEALING? Sometimes, we’re so exhausted from fighting to survive that when we have a breakthrough in our healing, we feel like we’re done. The truth is that often it’s a gateway, not the destination. While it’s important to take time to regroup and gather up your strength, true healing comes from moving forward. In this episode, I talk about how to use that hope and promise as your foundation to weather what’s coming next. (Watch Video) ...
You Can't Do __Blank__ Because of __Blank__
October 14, 2019 13:03 - 18 minutes - 24.4 MBYOU CAN’T DO ____ BECAUSE OF ______ Most of us have something we believe we can’t do because of some limitation. But the reality is, it’s just a mindset. In this episode, I talk about owning your power and how what you’re holding yourself back from may be exactly where you’re needed. (Watch Video) ….. [Essential Healing - Episode 3] #essentialhealing
You Don't Have To Protect Others From Your Truth
October 13, 2019 16:23 - 15 minutes - 21.4 MBYOU DON’T HAVE TO PROTECT OTHERS FROM YOUR TRUTH Getting to a place in your healing journey where you can share your truth is a HUGE accomplishment and yet, it can be scary to do it, even if you feel "ready." Especially if you’ve been conditioned to protect others. In this episode, I share how I’ve experienced this and how I learned that when it comes to MY truth, it’s not my responsibility to keep something that someone else is ashamed of a secret if it’s part of my journey. (Wa...
From Darkness To Light
October 11, 2019 14:02 - 21 minutes - 27.1 MBEMBRACING THE DARKNESS LEADS TO THE LIGHT It isn’t easy to dive into the "dark" or painful parts in us. In fact, most of us avoid it. AND, with all the advice around us to "focus on the positive" it seems like looking at our pain and darkness is taboo. When talking about your pain (physical or emotional), you may have heard things like "You shouldn’t focus on it." "Just focus on the positive." "I wouldn’t manifest that if I were you." Sound familiar? You may have even ...