How to Get Over Your Ex
296 episodes - English - Latest episode: 6 days ago - ★★★★★ - 509 ratingsBreakup coach Dorothy, outlines the steps to get over your ex without it “just taking time”.
She has combined her background in psychology with her life coach certification tools to provide actionable insights so that you're not only learning the why but you're learning the HOW to getting over your ex.
Note: Dorothy utilizes the "he" pronoun when talking about her ex but this work can be applied to anyone. All genders and sexual orientations are encouraged to listen and apply the tools.
Loving the How to Get Over Your Ex podcast?
Grab the Get Over Your Ex in 3 months or less course and get started applying the tools you're learning today for only $185! Here's the link to get started feeling better TODAY: https://dorothyabjohnson.com/getoveryourexcourse
Homepage Apple Podcasts Google Podcasts Overcast Castro Pocket Casts RSS feed
Episodes
Ep. 38 - Turning pain into power
June 01, 2020 09:00 - 21 minutes - 29.7 MB“He’s not hurting” “He’s not upset” “He didn’t choose me” “He didn’t love me” “I’m always replaced” “He’s not the same person” -- All very real statements my bravehearts come to me with. They feel like its all SO true. And when they do, it creates so much pain for them. So I’ve created an episode that will be a GAME CHANGER for any of you who feel like your pain is so heavy. Let’s turn your pain into power! In this episode: Why statements like “he’s not hurting” feel so true to you ...
Ep. 37 - Confidence after a breakup
May 25, 2020 09:00 - 30 minutes - 41.8 MBAfter a breakup rebuilding confidence is SO important. This week I’ve invited a special guest, expert confidence coach Christina Kwan to talk to us about confidence specifically related to after a breakup. In this episode: Why is our confidence lowered after a breakup? Confidence, self-worth, self-esteem, what are the differences between them? Why is self-confidence so important? Next steps to help rebuild confidence after a breakup Christina Kwan: website: theroaduncovered...
Ep. 36 - Creating closure for yourself
May 18, 2020 09:00 - 8 minutes - 12.3 MBOftentimes we leave closure up to someone else. We think we need to have a conversation with our ex but closure isn’t what we think it is. And we have the power to create it for ourselves. Stop giving away your power and learn how to close this chapter on your own without his input. In this episode: Why we tend to give him the power when we’re looking for closure Why we don’t want his input in the closure discussion The exact steps to find closure for yourself without having a di...
Ep. 35 - How to stop competing with your ex
May 11, 2020 09:00 - 13 minutes - 17.9 MBWhy does it seem like we are in constant competition with our ex? We were once a team and now all of sudden I feel like I’m losing at life. Comparison is normal however I’m seeing with my clients that we use it against ourselves instead of to help us. In this episode: Learn why we compete and compare ourselves with our ex The different types of comparison The exact steps to use comparison as a way to catapult yourself into the life results you actually want
Ep. 34 - Opportunities in your breakup
May 04, 2020 09:00 - 13 minutes - 18.5 MBWhen we choose to find limitations in our life we will find limitations. It’s so hard to see opportunities and possibilities in the midst of heartbreak but doing so can be the difference between you staying stuck in heartbreak or finding the life you’ve always wanted. In this episode: Learn about opportunities vs limitations What’s on the other side of heartbreak How to focus and find your opportunities
Ep. 33 - Toxic people and relationships
April 27, 2020 09:00 - 11 minutes - 16.4 MBI often hear people talking about others as “toxic” or a relationship was “toxic” when in reality there are no toxic people, only toxic thoughts. And when we choose to think of someone as toxic, we are only doing ourselves a disservice. In this episode: Learn how there are no toxic humans just toxic thoughts How it hurts us to think about other humans in that way How to deal with “toxic” humans and relationships
Ep. 32 - Breakup Coach Q&As
April 20, 2020 09:00 - 25 minutes - 34.8 MBYay, you Bravehearts ask and I’m here to ANSWER. Today we are talking about frequently asked questions aka a question and answer session. I am here to serve you so therefore I wanted to answer some of your most burning breakup questions! In this episode: I can’t break away from wanting him back, I’ve tried to change my thinking but I just can’t Revenge Closure Getting back together with your ex Reaching out during isolation Guilt of leaving He moves on quickly Forgiving myse...
Ep. 31 - Having fun vs feeling sorry for myself
April 13, 2020 09:00 - 13 minutes - 18.3 MBToday we talk about how having fun during your breakup journey is 1) possible and 2) super transformational. We explore a specific client example of this and how having fun helped her let go and move on from her suffering and feeling sorry for herself. In this episode: How can we have fun during a breakup Why it’s so important to have fun during healing How having fun will speed up getting over your ex
Ep. 30 - What breakup lies are keeping you stuck?
April 06, 2020 09:00 - 17 minutes - 23.6 MBToday we are talking about breakup lies that I’m seeing so many of us mistake for truth. They are common and oh so sneaky. Many of us think them, believe them, and mistake them as facts when in reality there is so much evidence for how false the lie actually is. In this episode: What is a breakup lie How do I identify it and change it The steps to crack the lie so you can move on
Ep. 29 - Clean pain vs dirty pain
March 30, 2020 09:00 - 10 minutes - 15 MBThere are two types of pain going on during heartbreak. We have clean pain which is the typical grief, sadness and loss we experience with heartbreak but I also see a secondary pain that is being compounded which holds us back from actually getting over our ex and moving on. That pain is called “dirty pain” where we tend to shame ourselves because we are even experiencing emotional suffering in the first place. In this episode: What is clean pain vs dirty pain? How do I know if I’m ...
Ep. 28 - Post traumatic growth
March 23, 2020 09:00 - 14 minutes - 19.5 MBPost-traumatic growth is something I talk about with my clients pretty often however it’s very relevant to what everyone is experiencing in the world right now so I wanted to make sure to cover it with all the Braveheart listeners. During times of trauma or crisis, we can come out of it stronger and more developed than prior to the event taking place. What would it be like if you used this heartbreak as one of those moments to up-level your own personal development? FREE How to Get Over Yo...
Ep. 27 - Handling chaos during heartbreak
March 19, 2020 09:00 - 23 minutes - 32.1 MBOverall this is a time to rise up. In 3 to 4 months from now I want you to be STRONGER I want you to come out of this like OMG what did she do?!?! This is not a time for vacation, this is not time to buffer away our lives and just eat, drink, watch Netflix and chill. It’s time to step up, to provide value to the world, to create our goals, to overcome this all, together, as one. This is the time to CHANGE YOUR LIFE. This is the opportunity you’ve been looking for, you just haven’t seen it ye...
Ep. 26 - How to forgive your ex
March 16, 2020 09:00 - 16 minutes - 22 MBThis topic is the most life-changing topic for my clients. This is what CHANGED the game for me after my breakup and it took me a YEAR to figure this out, and now you won't have to. Learning to forgive will be what changes it all for YOU. It has nothing to do with him, you don’t even have to have a conversation with him. Learn how to forgive and let go so that you can move on! In this episode: What does it mean to forgive? Why forgiveness has nothing to do with your ex The exact steps...
Ep. 25 - Commitment and determination after a breakup
March 09, 2020 09:00 - 12 minutes - 16.6 MBThe reason this is so important is because we MUST show up as future you. Future you who is over her ex, who is THRIVING not just surviving, the woman who knows her worth, attracts what she wants in life, and makes decisions that benefit her long term not short term. The woman who isn’t constantly obsessing over her ex, stalking his and her social media. You are NOT That person. Being committed and determined and dedicated to your growth will be the difference between incremental growth vs...
Ep. 24 - Money and scarcity in breakup
March 06, 2020 10:00 - 44 minutes - 60.5 MBGoing through a breakup (and obviously divorce) costs money. Not only do your expenses double but you are also struggling with scarcity around your life in general, so living in financial scarcity can be an easy subconscious decision that leads to missing opportunities to make or save more. Join me as I discuss breakups, divorce, money and scarcity with my million dollar money coach Jill Wright. In this episode: Why are we living in scarcity when going through a breakup? What to do when...
Ep. 23 - Should I stay or should I go
March 02, 2020 10:00 - 15 minutes - 21.6 MBShould I leave the relationship or should I stay? Many individuals come to me confused, doubtful, and full of fear trying to make a decision because they think they’ll feel better either with or without this other human. What if I told you, you could make this decision and feel great no matter what? Let me teach you how! In this episode: We talk about why you’re struggling to make this decision Why you’re feeling confused and in limbo How to make this decision and feel great no ma...
Ep. 22 - The grief bubble
February 24, 2020 10:00 - 17 minutes - 24 MBI found out my ex got married this weekend via an Instagram story. Gotta love the gram. It’s been almost 4 years and ultimately I’m so grateful for him and have so much love towards him and now his new wife, I was surprised that I had overwhelming emotions from so long ago, bubble up. I share this experience and a new concept that was created through this called “the grief bubble”. In this episode: What a grief bubble is How to notice and become aware of a grief bubble before reacti...
Ep. 21 - The learn to love your loneliness experiment
February 17, 2020 10:00 - 16 minutes - 23.2 MBI don’t know about you, but for me, I did everything I could to not be alone after my breakup. I was busy during the week and ensured I was away for the weekend so I wouldn’t be alone with my thoughts. I didn’t want to feel lonely. I hated feeling lonely and even felt it when I was in a crowd of people. Learn how to love your loneliness through this new experiment. In this episode: Why do we hate being alone after a breakup? How can we learn to love our loneliness The learn to lov...
Ep. 20 - Time has NOTHING to do with getting over him
February 10, 2020 10:00 - 13 minutes - 19.2 MBTime has nothing to do with getting over your ex. Most people will say, “it’s just going to take some time for your heart to heal” but I’m here to tell you that’s ALL WRONG. After going through my own experience and spending years of helping women through breakups and divorce I know without a doubt time has nothing to do with it, but I know what does. Join me today as I explain this concept and what you can do about it. In this episode: Why time has nothing to do with heartbreak Wha...
Ep. 19 - Valentines day is neutral
February 03, 2020 10:00 - 13 minutes - 18.8 MBValentine's day is neutral, what are you making it mean? Are you dreading the day? Are you content about the day? Are you excited about the day? How are you thinking and feeling about valentines day and what kind of experience will be created because of that? Learn how and why Valentine's day is neutral and how to create and decide your experience for the day AHEAD of time! In this episode: How and why is valentines day neutral? What it means to create your own experience ahead of t...
Ep. 18 - Why is he not hurting?
January 27, 2020 10:00 - 14 minutes - 19.9 MBThis is one of my most frequently asked questions on consultations. We think that him moving on or him acting like everything is fine equates to him not hurting. But that’s simply not true. In this episode: Why do we let how he’s coping dictate how we feel? A specific client example The exact steps on how to overcome this for yourself
Ep. 17 - I just want to feel better
January 20, 2020 10:00 - 16 minutes - 22.5 MBImmediately following heartbreak we often just want to feel better, the pain coming from the end of the relationship can be so overbearing. But what if I told you that by switching “I just want to feel better” to something else, you would find so much relief? In this episode: How to find relief in the overbearing emotions of heartbreak 4 steps to feel better My experience with feeling better Thrive Wellness Retreat: Instagram: @thrivewellnessretreat_ Inquiries: hello@thriv...
Ep. 16 - Overwhelming memories of him
January 13, 2020 10:00 - 9 minutes - 13.4 MBMemories are sentences in our brain ABOUT our past. Not everyone will have the same thoughts about the past but after a breakup those thoughts and feelings that come with the past can be overwhelming. Often times we feel at the effect of our emotions in that moment but I promise you, YOU have control. In this episode: Why the overwhelming memories of him flood in How to cope with those thoughts and feelings in the moment What to do about the memories
Ep. 16 - Overwhelming memories of your ex
January 13, 2020 10:00 - 9 minutes - 13.4 MBMemories are sentences in our brain ABOUT our past. Not everyone will have the same thoughts about the past but after a breakup those thoughts and feelings that come with the past can be overwhelming. Often times we feel at the effect of our emotions in that moment but I promise you, YOU have control. In this episode: Why the overwhelming memories of him flood in How to cope with those thoughts and feelings in the moment What to do about the memories
Ep. 15 - Stop wasting your wants
January 06, 2020 10:00 - 10 minutes - 13.8 MBWhy are we focused on him not giving you what you want? This isn’t about him, it’s about YOU. Out of all the things we could be wanting and creating in our life why are we focused on changing other people? Why is this a problem and what can we do to overcome our “wants”? In this episode: What does wasting our wants mean? 3 biggest problems about “wanting” How to overcome wanting
Ep. 14 - Stop questioning and doubting your judgment
December 30, 2019 10:00 - 13 minutes - 18.9 MBI have many women that come to me who are experiencing an unexpected change in their life because of their heartbreak. They are left wondering, “how did I not see this coming?” “what was I thinking?” and it leads to them questioning and doubting their own judgment. Smart, successful, bomb AF women, questioning their own judgment. In today’s episode, I unwrap, what we tend to do this, why it’s a problem, and what to do about it. In this episode: Learn why we question and doubt our judg...
Ep. 13 - A no contact rule you haven't heard of
December 23, 2019 10:00 - 9 minutes - 13.1 MBThere is a lot of information out there about why the no contact rule after a breakup is a good or a bad thing. The pros, the cons, the benefits, and why it works or doesn’t work. Here’s my two cents. Everyone is different. Everyone’s relationship is different. I don’t think it needs to be a blanket statement. I have some clients that cut everything off and have zero contact, and that works for them. I have other clients who remained friends and hang out in the same friend groups and that wo...
Ep. 12 - When you run into your ex
December 16, 2019 10:00 - 10 minutes - 13.8 MBNothing is worse than running into your ex unexpectedly, showing up all kinds of weird and awkward. So many of my clients live in the same area as their ex and know they may or may not run into them. However, they don’t create a plan for how they want to show up in this moment. SO, in today’s episode, I give you the step by step process I walk through with my clients to create a plan on purpose for running into their ex so they are 100% never caught off guard! In this episode: What to...
Ep. 11 - Conscious Uncoupling with Alexander James
December 09, 2019 10:00 - 1 hour - 96.1 MBToday is the first interview I’m launching on the How to Get Over Your Ex podcast! So excited! Alexander James and I talk through the book Conscious Uncoupling by Katherine Woodward Thomas and his personal experiencing using this book to breakup with his partner. In this episode: What is conscious uncoupling? How can I use this in my breakup? What are the biggest takeaways from the book? What if it’s just me and my partner doesn’t want to read it? What is the best way to breakup...
Ep. 10 - 3rd phase to getting over your ex in 90 days
December 02, 2019 10:00 - 9 minutes - 12.8 MBIn today’s episode, I cover the third phase (getting excited about life again) to getting over your ex in 90 days. I remember freaking out about my future after my breakup. The future I built was with him so how in the world could I be excited about what is in the future if there was for certain no way I’d have that future without him? In this episode: Why it’s so important to build a future you’re obsessed with How to get excited about life again after a breakup Tactics and tools...
Ep. 9 - 2nd phase to getting over your ex in 90 days
November 25, 2019 10:00 - 15 minutes - 20.8 MBIn today’s episode, I cover the second phase (rebuilding your confidence and rewriting your breakup story) to getting over your ex in 90 days. Rewriting your place from a confident place is vital to not recreating your past over and over and over again. I give you the next steps to go and implement the second phase into your life so you can start the process of getting over your ex. In this episode: What does it mean to rebuild confidence and rewrite your breakup story? How do I bui...
Ep. 8 - 1st phase to getting over your ex in 90 days
November 18, 2019 10:00 - 23 minutes - 32.4 MBGetting over your ex doesn’t have to just take time. Time has nothing to do with it. In this three week series, I walk you through the three phases to getting over your ex in 90 days. This 3 phased approach is the process I take my clients through and today we take a deep dive into phase #1. 3 Phases: Taking back control of your emotions Rebuilding your confidence to rewrite your breakup story Getting excited about life again In today’s episode, I cover the first phase with y...
Ep. 7 - Overcoming fear to follow your intuition
November 11, 2019 10:00 - 25 minutes - 46.8 MBThis past weekend I had the opportunity to speak at The Summit of Love. I did a working session on following your intuition to live a happier and healthier life. So in the past 4 months I've done a DEEP DIVE into what does that actually mean? And what can I provide to the audience in this area? One of the biggest reasons people don’t listen to their intuition/inner voice is because of fear. Fear of failing, fear of uncertainty and ultimately it comes down to fear of feeling a negative...
Ep. 7 - Overcoming fear to follow your intuition
November 11, 2019 10:00 - 25 minutes - 34.9 MBThis past weekend I had the opportunity to speak at The Summit of Love. I did a working session on following your intuition to live a happier and healthier life. So in the past 4 months I've done a DEEP DIVE into what does that actually mean? And what can I provide to the audience in this area? One of the biggest reasons people don’t listen to their intuition/inner voice is because of fear. Fear of failing, fear of uncertainty and ultimately it comes down to fear of feeling a negative...
Ep. 6 - Building a new relationship with yourself
November 04, 2019 10:00 - 12 minutes - 16.6 MBYour relationship with yourself is EVERYTHING. It’s the number one relationship you’ll have in your life. It’s vital to build that relationship with yourself for two reasons. 1) to rebuild your confidence with yourself 2) learn to love spending time alone. If you’re anything like me, this was a new concept. I had built my life around someone else. I wasn't even aware that I didn't have true awareness around who I was, what I liked and what I disliked. I had no true sense of identity. I...
Ep. 5 - When the distractions stop working
October 20, 2019 21:36 - 13 minutes - 17.9 MBIf you’re anything like me during a breakup, you’ve jammed your schedule full of things to do to avoid being alone and feeling your loneliness. I would try to distract myself until I had to sleep so that I wouldn’t have to sit with my own thoughts by myself. But what happens when the distractions stop working? Or we can’t use a distraction? We must sit with our thoughts and learn how to handle our negative and painful emotions. Our life is 50% positive and 50% negative. Learning ...
Ep. 4 - When my ex starts to see someone new
October 20, 2019 21:32 - 15 minutes - 21.7 MBThe day is here! I’m sharing my breakup story with all of you which includes a third person. Learn what I was making the new girl mean about me and how in reality our ex dating someone new has EVERYTHING to do with them and nothing to do with us. Our brain’s default is to 1) compare and despair or 2) make it mean something about us or 3) both. How is this playing out in your life and what can we do about it? Finding compassion for the human he is, experiencing the 50% negative an...
Ep. 4 - When your ex starts to see someone new
October 20, 2019 21:32 - 15 minutes - 21.7 MBThe day is here! I’m sharing my breakup story with all of you which includes a third person. Learn what I was making the new girl mean about me and how in reality our ex dating someone new has EVERYTHING to do with them and nothing to do with us. Our brain’s default is to 1) compare and despair or 2) make it mean something about us or 3) both. How is this playing out in your life and what can we do about it? Finding compassion for the human he is, experiencing the 50% negative an...
Ep. 4 - When he starts to see someone new
October 20, 2019 21:32 - 15 minutes - 21.7 MBThe day is here! I’m sharing my breakup story with all of you which includes a third person. Learn what I was making the new girl mean about me and how in reality our ex dating someone new has EVERYTHING to do with them and nothing to do with us. Our brain’s default is to 1) compare and despair or 2) make it mean something about us or 3) both. How is this playing out in your life and what can we do about it? Finding compassion for the human he is, experiencing the 50% negative an...
Ep. 3 - How to stop stalking his social media
October 20, 2019 21:29 - 11 minutes - 16.4 MBSocial media has forever changed heartbreak. It’s this added layer of complexity. We continue to look at his feed even when we know it’s not gonna make us feel better after the fact. Why? We tend to scroll the social for two reasons 1) to avoid feeling negative emotion 2) we actually get a hit of dopamine when we look at his/her feed. It’s like an urge you get when you’ve given up sugar and flour for an extended period of time. There are two methods I teach my clients to ensure s...
Ep. 3 - How to stop stalking my ex's social media
October 20, 2019 21:29 - 11 minutes - 16.4 MBSocial media has forever changed heartbreak. It’s this added layer of complexity. We continue to look at his feed even when we know it’s not gonna make us feel better after the fact. Why? We tend to scroll the social for two reasons 1) to avoid feeling negative emotion 2) we actually get a hit of dopamine when we look at his/her feed. It’s like an urge you get when you’ve given up sugar and flour for an extended period of time. There are two methods I teach my clients to ensure s...
Ep. 2 - How to stop thinking about my ex
October 20, 2019 21:21 - 12 minutes - 17.9 MBI get it. It’s so damn annoying. Your brain is CONSUMED with him/her. It’s all you can think about… I would have paid big money to just mechanically erase him from my brain. I haven’t found that solution but I found something else that works! Our brain has 60k-80k thoughts in a day, and the brain is an efficient organ. So when it can run on default it wants to and it will. So when someone used to be in our life every day, it’s easy for the brain to focus on that person not being ...
Ep. 2 - I can’t stop thinking about him
October 20, 2019 21:21 - 12 minutes - 17.9 MBI get it. It’s so damn annoying. Your brain is CONSUMED with him/her. It’s all you can think about… I would have paid big money to just mechanically erase him from my brain. I haven’t found that solution but I found something else that works! Our brain has 60k-80k thoughts in a day, and the brain is an efficient organ. So when it can run on default it wants to and it will. So when someone used to be in our life every day, it’s easy for the brain to focus on that person not being ...
Ep. 2 - I can’t stop thinking about my ex
October 20, 2019 21:21 - 12 minutes - 17.9 MBI get it. It’s so damn annoying. Your brain is CONSUMED with him/her. It’s all you can think about… I would have paid big money to just mechanically erase him from my brain. I haven’t found that solution but I found something else that works! Our brain has 60k-80k thoughts in a day, and the brain is an efficient organ. So when it can run on default it wants to and it will. So when someone used to be in our life every day, it’s easy for the brain to focus on that person not being ...
Ep. 1 - Why you’re not over your ex yet
October 20, 2019 20:56 - 11 minutes - 15.4 MBWhen I went through my earth-shattering breakup after a 7 year relationship I googled “how to get over my ex” for a full year. I did everything I could to figure out how to forgive and move on. Everyone kept telling me it was just going to “take time”. After a year of waiting for the time to heal my heart I was over it. That’s when I found out, time had nothing to do with it. It had everything to do with what I was making my breakup mean about me that was holding me back. I was a...
Ep. 1 - Why you’re not over him yet
October 20, 2019 20:56 - 11 minutes - 15.4 MBWhen I went through my earth-shattering breakup after a 7 year relationship I googled “how to get over my ex” for a full year. I did everything I could to figure out how to forgive and move on. Everyone kept telling me it was just going to “take time”. After a year of waiting for the time to heal my heart I was over it. That’s when I found out, time had nothing to do with it. It had everything to do with what I was making my breakup mean about me that was holding me back. I was a...