Complex PTSD Recovery: We Are Traumatized Motherfuckers
282 episodes - English - Latest episode: 26 days ago - ★★★★★ - 152 ratingsPeer-review and irreverent dark humor meet relational trauma recovery, without the "enforced bright sides." Let's talk about the complicated experience of rectifying a life built on trauma and relearning to be human... more healthily than those shitheads who raised you. You aren't alone, damaged, doomed, or dead yet. But with all the grit and gumption necessary to keep growing, you might be a real MF.
Get 400+ research-heavy episodes and private community options @ Patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers or t-mfrs.com for more info.
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Episodes
Leveraging Anger in the war of Complex Trauma Recovery
July 07, 2020 14:00 - 22 minutes - 21.1 MBAnger has a bad rap. No, we don't need more angst or outrage in this world... but when your emotions are limited by anxiety, overwhelm, and triggers, a Motherfucker only has so many options. "Finding Peace," and, "Believing in Bright Sides," aren't going to be on that list. This is how indigence can be a useful tool to kickstart a trauma recovery journey. Git mad, git proactive, and prove that all those fuckers who held you back back before won't hold you down forever. By the way, I wron...
Trick your Trauma Brain into action
July 07, 2020 13:00 - 14 minutes - 13.2 MBWho's great at thinking about doing something, getting stressed out, and then guilting themselves for failing to start? For 10 years, it was this guy right here! And a lot of other Motherfuckers. That internal resistance. The thought that “nothing matters” or “you can’t do it right, anyways.” The voice that tells you it’s impossible. Or, the sense that you need to feel inspired to get started, and maybe that will all shift on its own tomorrow. It's convincing. But once you get over the initia...
Early Days Rerelease: Leveraging Anger in the war of Complex Trauma Recovery
July 05, 2020 17:50 - 25 minutes - 23.6 MBAnger has a bad rap. No, we don't need more angst or outrage in this world... but when your emotions are limited by anxiety, overwhelm, and triggers, a Motherfucker only has so many options. "Finding Peace," and, "Believing in Bright Sides," aren't going to be on that list. This is how indigence can be a useful tool to kickstart a trauma recovery journey. Git mad, git proactive, and prove that all those fuckers who held you back back before won't hold you down forever. By the way, I wron...
Turn universal human fears into comforts
July 04, 2020 19:00 - 21 minutes - 20 MBWhat happens when you've lost it all? You've got nothing left to lose, motherfucker. After your worst possible worries come true, it gives you a new perspective on what's coming next. Or, at least it did in this MF's case. This is a journal-turned-blog post-turned-podcast that you might not be ready for. Talking about universal human fears in no-nonsense terms. The worst case scenarios. The most terrifying ideas that creep up on us at night.... And how they're all completely true. 😬 Peopl...
Fear and Helplessness; There is no merit in worrying
July 02, 2020 17:00 - 59 minutes - 55.5 MBIt's a marathon episode of back-to-back blog posts, motherfucker! Talking about the mindset of fear and helplessness running the show of your life. What's stopping you from doing things you know you should? Probably yourself. For me, life gets stunted on repeat by runaway catastrophic thinking and sense of pending doom that fills my traumatized brain. How can you get started on anything when you're convinced it's going to be disastrous or deadly? Ya fucking can't. Where do these victimized ...
Blog | Fear and Helplessness; There is no merit in worrying
July 02, 2020 17:00 - 1 hour - 58.5 MBIt's a marathon episode of back-to-back blog posts, motherfucker! Talking about the mindset of fear and helplessness running the show of your life. What's stopping you from doing things you know you should? Probably yourself. For me, life gets stunted on repeat by runaway catastrophic thinking and sense of pending doom that fills my traumatized brain. How can you get started on anything when you're convinced it's going to be disastrous or deadly? Ya fucking can't. Where do these victimized ...
Fear and Helplessness controlled my life; There is no merit in worrying
July 02, 2020 17:00 - 59 minutes - 55.5 MBIt's a marathon episode of back-to-back blog posts, motherfucker! Talking about the mindset of fear and helplessness running the show of your life. What's stopping you from doing things you know you should? Probably yourself. For me, life gets stunted on repeat by runaway catastrophic thinking and sense of pending doom that fills my traumatized brain. How can you get started on anything when you're convinced it's going to be disastrous or deadly? Ya fucking can't. Where do these victimized ...
Early Days Rerelease: Fear and Helplessness | There is no merit in worrying
July 01, 2020 17:49 - 1 hour - 57.1 MBIt's a marathon episode of back-to-back blog posts, motherfucker! Talking about the mindset of fear and helplessness running the show of your life. What's stopping you from doing things you know you should? Probably yourself. For me, life gets stunted on repeat by runaway catastrophic thinking and sense of pending doom that fills my traumatized brain. How can you get started on anything when you're convinced it's going to be disastrous or deadly? Ya fucking can't. Where do these victimized ...
Early Days Rerelease: Live | Shaking off shitty behaviors and getting trauma on track
July 01, 2020 17:48 - 52 minutes - 47.9 MBA wild update 'cast from adventures in trauma; off the cuff and sharing a busy week of learning & developments. PLUS - A fellow trauma traveler from across the globe reaches out! Sharing the goosebump-raising voice message sent from an amazing New Zealander, now proud to call herself a Motherfucker. A gift I accept with so much gratitude, and oh, her beautiful accent. This week... your motherfucker's actually keeping the trauma terrors at bay. Why? Because I'm finally not acting like an ass...
Live | Shaking off shitty behaviors and getting trauma on track
July 01, 2020 17:14 - 53 minutes - 49.3 MBA wild update 'cast from adventures in trauma; off the cuff and sharing a busy week of learning & developments. PLUS - A fellow trauma traveler from across the globe reaches out! Sharing the goosebump-raising voice message sent from an amazing New Zealander, now proud to call herself a Motherfucker. A gift I accept with so much gratitude, and oh, her beautiful accent. This week... your motherfucker's actually keeping the trauma terrors at bay. Why? Because I'm finally not acting like an ass...
Shaking off shitty behaviors and getting trauma on track
July 01, 2020 17:14 - 49 minutes - 45.7 MBA wild update 'cast from adventures in trauma; off the cuff and sharing a busy week of learning & developments. PLUS - A fellow trauma traveler from across the globe reaches out! Sharing the goosebump-raising voice message sent from an amazing New Zealander, now proud to call herself a Motherfucker. A gift I accept with so much gratitude, and oh, her beautiful accent. This week... your motherfucker's actually keeping the trauma terrors at bay. Why? Because I'm finally not acting like an ass...
"Maybe in 10 years" with Daniel and Jess - Talking Vulnerability, Trauma Mindset Recovery, and Terrible Relationships
June 27, 2020 18:31 - 53 minutes - 49.6 MBThe very first episode of "Maybe in 10 years." The conversation and interview portion of the Complex Trauma podcast. Because no one needs to listen to my voice all day. Traumatized Motherfuckers' Community Makers/Moderators Daniel and Jess sit down with a fine box of wine and talk Trauma. And motherfucker, maybe it's that sweet rush of Franzia, but we cover a lot of ground. Topics include; getting over the fear of being vulnerable, learning about our diagnoses, leaning into depressive da...
Converse | "Maybe in 10 years" - Talking Vulnerability, Trauma Mindset Recovery, and Terrible Relationships
June 27, 2020 18:31 - 53 minutes - 49.6 MBThe very first episode of "Maybe in 10 years." The conversation and interview portion of the Complex Trauma podcast. Because no one needs to listen to my voice all day. Traumatized Motherfuckers' Community Makers/Moderators Daniel and Jess sit down with a fine box of wine and talk Trauma. And motherfucker, maybe it's that sweet rush of Franzia, but we cover a lot of ground. Topics include; getting over the fear of being vulnerable, learning about our diagnoses, leaning into depressive da...
Blog | Endless Trauma Loops; Why do they happen and how to forgive mistakes on repeat
June 26, 2020 17:00 - 32 minutes - 30.2 MBFor the past 2 years, I've had major epiphany moments about my trauma journey and recovery .I've made enormous progress in changing my mindset and behaviors to change my life - working towards building one I actually want, instead of one shaped by trauma. And then... I found an old journal that effectively demonstrates that I've known this information all along. Since, you know, a decade ago. I've had all the answers, I've known the right steps to take, and I've relived the same trauma patt...
Endless Trauma Loops; Why do they happen and how to forgive mistakes on repeat
June 26, 2020 17:00 - 29 minutes - 27.2 MBFor the past 2 years, I've had major epiphany moments about my trauma journey and recovery .I've made enormous progress in changing my mindset and behaviors to change my life - working towards building one I actually want, instead of one shaped by trauma. And then... I found an old journal that effectively demonstrates that I've known this information all along. Since, you know, a decade ago. I've had all the answers, I've known the right steps to take, and I've relived the same trauma patt...
Blog | Complex Trauma and insecure attachments. Why romantic relationships wreck my world
June 25, 2020 17:00 - 27 minutes - 25.7 MBI'm not proud to admit, I have bad relationships. I get obsessive and anxious. I fall into unhealthy patterns with unhealthy people. And I let them destroy my life from the inside out. Part of this pattern is due to insecure attachments and trauma brain. The other part? My love for equally damaged animals. I'm a sucker for "helping" people at the cost of helping myself. I'm drawn to people with problems. I'm skilled at orienting my life around someone else's. I'm great at being a little he...
Complex Trauma and insecure attachments. Why romantic relationships wreck my world
June 25, 2020 17:00 - 24 minutes - 22.7 MBI'm not proud to admit, I have bad relationships. I get obsessive and anxious. I fall into unhealthy patterns with unhealthy people. And I let them destroy my life from the inside out. Part of this pattern is due to insecure attachments and trauma brain. The other part? My love for equally damaged animals. I'm a sucker for "helping" people at the cost of helping myself. I'm drawn to people with problems. I'm skilled at orienting my life around someone else's. I'm great at being a little he...
Early Days Rerelease: Endless Trauma Loops | Why do they happen and how to forgive mistakes on repeat
June 24, 2020 17:46 - 31 minutes - 29 MBFor the past 2 years, I've had major epiphany moments about my trauma journey and recovery .I've made enormous progress in changing my mindset and behaviors to change my life - working towards building one I actually want, instead of one shaped by trauma. And then... I found an old journal that effectively demonstrates that I've known this information all along. Since, you know, a decade ago. I've had all the answers, I've known the right steps to take, and I've relived the same trauma patt...
Early Days Rerelease: Complex Trauma and insecure attachments. Why romantic relationships wreck my world
June 24, 2020 17:45 - 26 minutes - 24.6 MBI'm not proud to admit, I have bad relationships. I get obsessive and anxious. I fall into unhealthy patterns with unhealthy people. And I let them destroy my life from the inside out. Part of this pattern is due to insecure attachments and trauma brain. The other part? My love for equally damaged animals. I'm a sucker for "helping" people at the cost of helping myself. I'm drawn to people with problems. I'm skilled at orienting my life around someone else's. I'm great at being a little he...
Leaning into dark emotions; Getting honest about my lost relationship
June 24, 2020 15:50 - 29 minutes - 27.2 MBSo... for months I've been doing well, spitting optimism, and riding highs. But this hasn't been totally honest with myself. There's been something bubbling under the surface that I haven't wanted to deal with. I haven't been acknowledging the truth about a dangerous-feeling emotion. And it hasn't been doing me any favors. The more you avoid, the more the feeling disrupts your motherfucking life. Today, I'm talking off-script about how I lean into uncomfortable feelings and pull out the co...
LIVE from my childhood home; Experiments and Results in C-PTSD management
June 17, 2020 17:34 - 28 minutes - 26.8 MBWho’s back home and losing my trauma recovery footing? This guy! When we left off, I was talking trauma and triggers caused by revisiting my roots. What’s happened since then? Instead of fleeing from my discomfort for the safety of Atlanta.... I’ve been doing a lot of experimenting. These are the trials and the results in managing my trauma responses in my most triggering environment. Am I pulling it together this time? Or falling apart, like so many times in the past? To share your exper...
Early Days Rerelease: Visiting home and trauma journey backslides
June 10, 2020 17:44 - 29 minutes - 27.4 MBFor months I’ve been great (you know, relatively speaking for a Traumatized MF). I’ve been focused, uber productive, healthy, and happy, locked inside my room in Atlanta..... and then I came home to Illinois. Triggers: everywhere. Trauma mindset: ACTIVATED. I’ve been a fucking anxious, fearful, defeated mess, our of nowhere - and I can’t help but wonder.... How can such a high high be immediately followed by a descent to trauma lows? Will I pull this shit back together, or is this another sl...
LIVE: Visiting home and trauma journey backslides
June 10, 2020 16:18 - 30 minutes - 28.5 MBFor months I’ve been great (you know, relatively speaking for a Traumatized MF). I’ve been focused, uber productive, healthy, and happy, locked inside my room in Atlanta..... and then I came home to Illinois. Triggers: everywhere. Trauma mindset: ACTIVATED. I’ve been a fucking anxious, fearful, defeated mess, our of nowhere - and I can’t help but wonder.... How can such a high high be immediately followed by a descent to trauma lows? Will I pull this shit back together, or is this another sl...
An abusive relationship and a new purpose. Origins of a Motherfucker, Part 4.
May 28, 2020 18:43 - 20 minutes - 18.9 MBLessons; one year after leaving my abusive relationship and losing it all. I'm talking self-shame, inner critics, and forgiveness in the wake of another abusive circumstance. This is part 4 of my origin story; where I’ve been, what I’ve conquered, and how I began my trauma recovery journey after years of giving up on myself. This 'cast is about dark times... but these shadowy days are the origins of Traumatized Motherfuckers, my trauma support project. Let's get honest about it. If you're i...
Intro to stress, inflammation, and autoimmune disease. My origin story: Part 3.
May 28, 2020 18:04 - 18 minutes - 17.3 MBThis is the story of an overachiever lifestyle and decades of unmanaged childhood trauma resulting in autoimmune breakdown and mysterious illness in my early 20's. Part 3 of my personal origin story and my introduction to Trauma. There’s a lot more to say about this ongoing physical illness, but hey, these blog posts turned audio recordings are a start. Here's a concise overview of my rapid fall from ambitious, scientific grace into physical and mental debilitation. The onset of my "Traumati...
The father, the son, and the financial ruin: Part 2 of my Intro to C-PTSD
May 21, 2020 20:32 - 22 minutes - 21.1 MBWhat are the origins of my childhood trauma story? Where did this Trauma Project start? Buckle up, Motherfuckers. Learn - briefly and sensitively - about my personal trauma story as I continue recording through my original blog posts. The intention? Not to wallow or complain about hard times... but to connect with people who've always felt alone. I'm turning these writings into audio recordings, so strong Motherfuckers can connect without giving up their time and eyesight. Listen along and j...
Blog | Getting Vulnerable; Intro to my C-PSTD
May 21, 2020 19:45 - 17 minutes - 16.5 MBListen up! It's THE FIRST blog post I made (and kept) for Traumatized Motherfuckers... read in audiobook style for your easy consumption. Get to know my inner shit from a difficult early life, and see if it sounds a lot like yours. At the end of the day, we’re just Traumatized Motherfuckers (AKA trauma warriors leveraging our pasts to help ourselves in the future). If you're into the message, come hang out! Join the community, find mindset support for your C-PTSD journey, and share your st...
Getting Vulnerable: Intro to my C-PSTD
May 21, 2020 19:45 - 14 minutes - 13.5 MBListen up! It's THE FIRST blog post I made (and kept) for Traumatized Motherfuckers... read in audiobook style for your easy consumption. Get to know my inner shit from a difficult early life, and see if it sounds a lot like yours. At the end of the day, we’re just Traumatized Motherfuckers (AKA trauma warriors leveraging our pasts to help ourselves in the future). If you're into the message, come hang out! Join the community, find mindset support for your C-PTSD journey, and share your st...
Early Days Rerelease: Intro to my C-PSTD
May 21, 2020 04:00 - 16 minutes - 15.5 MBListen up! It's THE FIRST blog post I made (and kept) for Traumatized Motherfuckers... read in audiobook style for your easy consumption. Get to know my inner shit from a difficult early life, and see if it sounds a lot like yours. At the end of the day, we’re just Traumatized Motherfuckers (AKA trauma warriors leveraging our pasts to help ourselves in the future). If you're into the message, come hang out! Join the community, find mindset support for your C-PTSD journey, and share your st...
Start Here | Introduction to Traumatized Motherfuckers.
May 18, 2020 21:00 - 12 minutes - 11.1 MBHanding you the information you need to understand your brain. The research and reasons for our internal events - our obsession, anxiety, apprehension, ADHD, overwhelm, brain fog, exhaustion, mania, depression, memory failure, relationship destruction, and struggle to rehabilitate long-term… among the other mental and inflammatory horsemen of CPTSD. Detailing the basic emotional and relational skills that no one ever taught us, and reframing the fucked up core beliefs that have shaped your w...
I am the Traumatized Motherfucker
May 18, 2020 19:46 - 23 minutes - 21.6 MBI’ve been too chicken shit to follow through with creating a podcast for the past year. The brutal voice in my head gave a million reasons not to. But Traumatized Motherfuckers don’t let fear determine their lives anymore. And I am the OG TMF. This is my Complex Trauma project, and I hope it can help - first, I just have to take the motherfucking steps. Join the community, find mindset support for your C-PTSD journey, and share your story at www.t-mfrs.com! Search the socials for Traumatized...
Early Days Rerelease: I am the Traumatized Motherfucker
May 18, 2020 17:41 - 23 minutes - 21.4 MBI’ve been too chicken shit to follow through with creating a podcast for the past year. The brutal voice in my head gave a million reasons not to. But Traumatized Motherfuckers don’t let fear determine their lives anymore. And I am the OG TMF. This is my Complex Trauma project, and I hope it can help - first, I just have to take the motherfucking steps. Join the community, find mindset support for your C-PTSD journey, and share your story at www.t-mfrs.com! Search the socials for Traumatized...