But Really, How Are You?
41 episodes - English - Latest episode: over 3 years ago -Learn, grow, and gain knowledge on emotional wellness. “But really, how are you?” dives into many of the real feelings you experience and investigates emotional wellbeing. Hear from psychology experts about how to dig into your emotions to experience a stronger connection with yourself and others. There’s something to learn from every episode. We hope you’ll grow in your ability to recognize and understand your emotions and gain wellness tools to express your feelings in healthy ways. You’ll learn new skills for communication, conflict resolution, and relationship-building. With emotional wellbeing comes a centered understanding of you—meaning more balance, mindfulness, resilience, purposeful living, and a positive self-image. Join us on the journey to emotional wellbeing and personal growth!
Homepage Google Podcasts Overcast Castro Pocket Casts RSS feed
Episodes
Episode 40: Ending Well & Starting New with Debbie Laaser
March 14, 2021 05:00 - 56 minutes - 38.8 MBThis is the final episode for this season! Endings can bring up mixed emotions: sadness, excitement, grief, anticipation, and gratefulness to name a few. Some endings happen intentionally and some are without choice. Whether that’s leaving a job, ending a relationship, selling a home, or even moving, we can end well by intentionally thinking how we would like to exit. Ending well makes room for new beginnings. In episode 40, we speak with Debbie Laaser on ending well and starting new beginn...
Episode 39: Mindfulness, Meditation, and Yoga with Dr. Sara Lazar
March 07, 2021 05:00 - 41 minutes - 28.3 MBOver the past few years, there has been growing popularity around the practices of mindfulness, meditation, and yoga. Curious about the life changing effects these practices had on so many, researchers began to question if there really was scientific evidence to support these practices. Dr. Sara Lazar was one of these individuals who wanted solid evidence that these practices produced changes in the brain. In Episode 39, we discuss with Dr. Sara Lazar about her research in the effects of mi...
Episode 38: The Purpose of Emotions with Karla McLaren
February 28, 2021 05:00 - 49 minutes - 34 MBWhen emotions arise, oftentimes we try to figure out how to fix them, rather than asking what they are trying to tell us. However, our emotions are not separate from or intelligence or logic. In fact, emotions are messengers telling us about what we may need or events to pay attention to. In Episode 38, we speak with Karla McLaren on the purpose of emotions. She explains the importance of connecting with them and how it benefits our well-being. Karla dives into the specific messages that a...
Episode 37: The Enneagram Part 2: Exploring Relationships with Leslie Root
February 21, 2021 05:00 - 46 minutes - 32.2 MBThis week’s episode is the second part of The Enneagram mini-series. This tool is useful for understanding ourselves, our roles, how we relate to one another, and how we find our place in the world. In Episode 37, we explore with Leslie Root how the enneagram affects our relationships. We will learn about the positives and pitfalls of each enneagram type, and how we can deepen our relational understanding with each particular personality type, growing greater compassion towards those aroun...
Episode 36: The Enneagram Part 1 with Ramona Reid
February 14, 2021 05:00 - 57 minutes - 39.8 MBFrom the moment a child is born, they are shaped by the world outside themselves. However, if you look at a young child, it is evident that they have their own unique personality. Because of this, various personality typing tools have evolved to help a person understand one’s self and others better. The Enneagram has its roots in ancient tradition, and has become a modern way to synthesize various personality types. The Enneagram outlines only nine personality types; however, this seemingl...
Episode 35: Opening Up Creativity with Dr. Terri Goslin-Jones
February 07, 2021 05:00 - 42 minutes - 29 MBOftentimes, when we think of being creative, we associate it with a form of art or creating a product. But being a creative person is more about how we think than what we produce. And living a creative life can affect every aspect from relationships, to problem solving, or self expression. In this episode, we talk with Dr. Terri Goslin-Jones about creativity and how it impacts our emotional well-being. She helps define what everyday creativity is and how it can change the way we view life...
Episode 34: Visceral Sensations with Danielle Braun-Kauffman
January 31, 2021 05:00 - 44 minutes - 30.6 MBWe often think of emotions as experiences of the mind, but our body has visceral sensations -- a body feeling -- for every emotion. When you are anxious, your stomach may feel in a knot. You may feel a flutter with a romantic touch of your hand. Or when you’re angry your chest gets tight. Our experiences may be different, but we all have visceral sensations for each emotion. In Episode 34, we speak with Danielle Braun-Kauffman who is a marriage and family therapist and is trained in Satir ...
Episode 33: Our Integrative Health with Shannon Myers
January 24, 2021 05:00 - 49 minutes - 34.3 MBSocieties over time have held different beliefs about how to look at the self and how to approach health and healing. In our westernized society, we frequently isolate the body and our physical nature when we look at health. However, in doing so, we ignore the interrelated nature of our mental, emotional, and spiritual parts and their combined impact on our health. In this episode, we talk with Shannon Myers, an integrated medicine provider. She explains that our whole being is interconnect...
Episode 32: Attachment Bonds with Jim Farm
January 17, 2021 05:00 - 58 minutes - 40.1 MBHave you ever wondered what is one of the greatest influences on your ability to trust yourself and others? In episode 32, we talk to Jim Farm about different attachment styles that form when we are young, and how they continue to influence every relationship that we have in our adulthood. Jim describes the four attachment styles: avoidant, anxious, disorganized, and secure. These styles continue throughout our life, unless we intentionally change them. Jim explains how an insecure attachm...
Episode 31: Creating Our Body Image with Dr. Katherine Iscoe
January 10, 2021 05:00 - 53 minutes - 36.6 MBBody image is the picture we create in our mind about ourselves. It can be positive or negative, constant or ever-changing. Our parents, culture, friends, and even our thoughts contribute to how we form our body image. Are there things you would like to change about the way you look? And if those things changed, how would that impact your life? These are some of the questions we talk about in this episode with Dr. Katherine Iscoe, a leading expert in cultivating positive body image. In this...
Episode 30: Stop Self-Sabotaging with Dr. Judy Ho
January 03, 2021 05:00 - 44 minutes - 30.3 MBSee ya later 2020! Happy New Year! And a new year means New Year’s resolutions and goals. It can be easy to dream up the things we would like to change. Do you have goals related to your career, relationship, lifestyle, or hobbies? But to make the changes we desire, we need to consider what will really make us happy and what are the things we do to get in the way - the ways we self-sabotage. In this episode we talk with Dr. Judy Ho, an expert on overcoming self-sabotage. She shares with u...
Episode 29: Ending the Year with Forgiveness with Dr. Everett Worthington
December 27, 2020 05:00 - 54 minutes - 37.6 MBThis year has brought many unexpected turns, yet just around the corner is a new year… a fresh slate. Our approach to forgiveness affects our emotional, relational, and physical health. Harboring resentment, anger and unforgiveness creates roadblocks in our personal lives. Through the process of forgiveness, we are able to clear the road to fresh beginnings. In this episode, we speak with Dr. Everett Worthington who is an expert on the subject of forgiveness. Through his research on the pr...
Episode 28: How Spirituality Affects Our Well-Being with Beth Miller
December 20, 2020 05:00 - 52 minutes - 36.4 MBThis week we speak with Beth Miller on the topic of spirituality. This episode is not about one particular religion, but rather about how spirituality is one important aspect of emotional well-being. Some of the important aspects of spirituality are faith, love, surrendering, and forgiveness. Beth shares about her new book, and how loss and anger can actually be healthy aspects of emotional well-being. Beth shares how being spiritually alive also means living in the present moment, and how ...
Episode 27: Stories from the Front Line with Dr. Audrey Shafer
December 13, 2020 05:00 - 1 hour - 42.1 MBWhat is it like to work on the front lines in this unprecedented pandemic? Are you a front line worker and have your own story to tell? In this very special episode, we will speak with Dr. Audrey Shafer who is the founder and director of the Medicine and the Muse Program at Stanford University and hear from front line workers about their experiences working during these difficult times. We will learn that medicine is an art, and that there is a great amount of ambivalence and decision fat...
Episode 26: Managing Anxiety with Dr. Rosean Bishop
December 06, 2020 05:00 - 52 minutes - 36.3 MBWe know this year has been tough. Many of us have experienced an increase in stress and anxiety. Dr. Rosean Bishop is a licensed psychologist at the Mayo Clinic Health Care System and an expert resource on the topic of anxiety. In this episode we talk about what causes our anxiety and what symptoms are associated with the various types of anxiety. Dr. Bishop also shares how we can manage our anxiety better. She shares when it’s appropriate to introduce a medication to help manage our sympt...
Episode 25: Family dynamics with Dr. Jessica Lougheed
November 29, 2020 05:00 - 48 minutes - 33.4 MBFamily dynamics are always tricky to navigate, especially around the holiday season. Dr. Jessica Lougheed focuses her research on family dynamics, and specifically on conflict resolution. In this episode she shares two important scales family can use to measure a healthy family dynamic: 1) family cohesion: the balance between separateness and connectedness 2) family flexibility: the balance between stability and change. Family conflict is a natural part of human life and can be healthy ...
Episode 24: Navigating the Holidays with Debbie Laaser
November 22, 2020 05:00 - 54 minutes - 37.5 MBSome say it’s the most wonderful time of the year—the holidays are just around the corner! We all have expectations about how the holidays will go, whether it’s family traditions or what we’ve learned from Hallmark movies. Some love the holidays, but for others it may bring up loss or disappointment. While the holidays are often tricky to navigate, the pandemic complicates things even more. We chat with Debbie Laaser again as she sheds some light on difficult holiday situations. In this epi...
Episode 23: Satir Psychology Part 2: Self-doubt and Self-esteem with Linda Lucas
November 15, 2020 05:00 - 49 minutes - 34.3 MBHas the phrase ‘I’m not good enough’ ever crossed your mind? It could be, I’m not good enough for this job, for this partner, to be on the team, or to make the cut. This is a common phrase that occurs in people’s minds, and it reveals a level of self-doubt that we believe about ourselves. This is part two of the Satir Model discussion. In this episode, Linda Lucas will share a little more about the Satir method, specifically how it related to our view of ourselves. We will discuss the dif...
Episode 22: Coming back to yourself: Satir psychology with Jennifer Nagel
November 08, 2020 05:00 - 50 minutes - 35 MBIn this episode, we learn about the Satir method of psychology, created by Virginia Satir. A pioneer in the the field, Satir took a different approach to family dynamics and became known known as the “Mother of Family Therapy.” Jennifer Nagel is an amazing psychologist who has had a leading role in the Satir Institute of the Pacific and other Satir networks. In this episode, Jennifer discusses how we develop our belief system and how this impacts our everyday experiences. She talks about ...
Episode 21: Emotionally immature parents with Dr. Lindsay Gibson
November 01, 2020 04:00 - 57 minutes - 39.3 MBHow we are raised and who raises us is one of the greatest influences on our lives. Some of us easily find faults in our parents or wish they had shown up in different ways. For others of us, we hold our parents in high esteem and believe they did a great job. But none of us had perfect parents. It can be hard to admit that our parents may have fallen short at times and it can be even harder to examine how this may have impacted us. It all left an imprint on our lives. In this episode, w...
Episode 20: Stress and calming techniques with Talya Feldman
October 25, 2020 04:00 - 1 hour - 42.8 MBThis year hasn't been easy. And we're still in a pandemic, folks. Fortunately, there are researchers who are trying to learn how we can become more resilient while dealing with COVID-19 related stresses for frontline workers and families. In this episode, researcher Talya Feldman shares about the challenges we're still facing during the pandemic and how we can learn and grow from them. Sleep and support are just two of the essential ingredients to maintaining our resilience—tune in to lear...
Episode 19: Communicating with your partner with Dr. John Crossen
October 18, 2020 04:00 - 43 minutes - 29.6 MBProblems and communication occur with every single romantic relationship. The good news is that you’re not alone. The Gottman Institute even deems poor communication in relationships a “standard perpetual problem.” Dr. John Crossen, a certified masters Gottman therapist, has been involved in this research at the institute for years. In this episode, we discuss the standard perpetual problems that every couple faces. Dr. Crossen also shares the things we do in our relationships that lead to...
Episode 18: Communicating at the workplace with Brandon Smith
October 11, 2020 04:00 - 48 minutes - 33.6 MBCommunication is important in all aspects of our lives, but why is it at work that our communication style can look incredibly different from when we are away from our job? Brandon Smith is a psychologist who specializes in communication in the working environment. In this episode we will discuss what are healthy and dysfunctional workplace dynamics. In this episode, Brandon shares that we can have boundaries while on the job. We talk about the energy that is created in the workplace envir...
Episode 17: Become a body language expert with Dr. David Matsumoto
October 04, 2020 04:00 - 55 minutes - 38.2 MBIn episode 2 of our communication series we learn about what is said when no one is speaking. This is non-verbal communication. Dr. David Matsumoto is the leading expert in the field of non-verbal communication—he and his team at Humintell have focused their research on body language and facial expression. Dr. Matsumoto talks about the common emotions in every culture and how facial expressions help us recognize them. As much as we would like to think we can hide how we feel, Dr. Matsumoto...
Episode 16: Effective communication with Bento Leal
September 27, 2020 04:00 - 47 minutes - 33 MBCommunication is an important aspect in any human relationship. So how can something so important lead to mixed messages? Bento Leal, a relationship skills trainer and author, focuses on helping individuals improve their communication skills and the importance of empathy—an essential ingredient in communication. In this episode, Bento shares some of the obstacles that often prevent effective communication. He also shares how we can use empathy to become active listeners and speakers in our ...
Episode 15: The essentials of a healthy brain with Dr. Shane Creado
September 20, 2020 04:00 - 1 hour - 44.8 MBTo achieve emotional and mental well-being, our brain needs to be healthy. Dr. Shane Creado is a board certified psychiatrist and sleep medicine doctor. This episode is all about how to get a healthy brain. Brain health includes multiple factors, including sleep, nutrition, toxins, exercise, and your environment. Dr. Creado talks us through these factors and takes a deep dive on the importance of sleep! This episode is full of practical tips to help you improve your brain health. A healthy ...
Episode 14: Psychology and Racism- a discussion with Dr. Richard Lee
September 13, 2020 04:00 - 59 minutes - 40.6 MBThe death of George Floyd during the pandemic forever changed the world. His brutal death demonstrates that racism is still an issue in our modern world today. This issue is too important not to talk about, so it is imperative we look at the psychology and history behind racism. For over 20 years, Dr. Richard Lee has been researching racial, ethnic, and migration experiences of immigrant and minoritized youth and families and how these experiences impact their development and mental health...
Episode 13: Grief and loss with Dr. Mary-Frances O’Connor
September 06, 2020 04:00 - 53 minutes - 36.6 MBGrief is a common emotion. It can be big or small. Big in the event of losing a loved one or experiencing a break up. And small in the everyday changes living through a pandemic has created. While it’s a common human experience, it’s often difficult to share it or understand how to work through it. Dr. Mary-Frances O’Connor is a top researcher in the field of psychology and grief. In this episode we discuss what causes grief, how it manifests in our body and mind, and how to work through i...
Episode 12: Am I drinking too much in the pandemic? Let’s discuss addiction with Dr. Jorja Jamison
August 30, 2020 04:00 - 44 minutes - 30.9 MBLiquor sales have soared through the roof with the onset of the global pandemic. You’re not alone if your alcohol consumption has increased this year. Do you ever wonder how much is okay? Have you asked yourself if you should cut back? In this episode, we talk with Dr. Jorja Jamison from Hazelden Betty Ford Graduate School of Addiction Studies. She talks about substance abuse disorders, ways to reflect on our own alcohol use, and how to recognize when we or someone we know has a problem wi...
Episode 11: Caution Fatigue with Heather Erickson
August 23, 2020 04:00 - 43 minutes - 29.9 MBCaution! We are in the middle of a world pandemic, if you didn’t already know. There are warning signs everywhere about what we need to do to protect ourselves and others. But did you know that being warned of danger over and over again can lead to a phenomenon called “Caution Fatigue”? We can also experience another challenge called “Compassion Fatigue” especially those who care for others such as parents, teachers, and frontline workers. In this episode we talk with Heather Erickson, th...
Episode 10: Cultivating Mindfulness with Dr. Ellen Langer
August 16, 2020 04:00 - 51 minutes - 35.5 MB“Mindfulness” is thrown around in our modern vocabulary, but what does it actually mean? Dr. Ellen Langer, the Mother of Mindfulness and Harvard professor, has researched this subject for over 40 years. In this episode we’ll learn what mindfulness is and how to practice it. Being present in the here and now is important for improving our mental well-being. It improves our relationships, increases contentment in life, and decreases our anxiety. Being present also has tremendous influences on...
Episode 9: How to Be Resilient with Dr. Rick Hanson
August 09, 2020 04:00 - 56 minutes - 38.9 MBLife can throw many major challenges at us. Sometimes it is a big event that we need to find resilience for, but for most people it is normal, everyday life that we need to learn how to find resilience within - we need to learn how to thrive in the mundane normal events of life. In today's episode, we talk with Dr. Rick Hanson who shares about how to find resilience in normal everyday life. He describes resilience as the capacity to recover from terrible experiences, as well as the ability...
Episode 8: Negativity Bias and Your Mindframe with Dr. Alison Ledgerwood
August 02, 2020 04:00 - 59 minutes - 40.6 MBIs the glass half full or half empty? It is quite obvious that not everyone sees the glass exactly the same. Negative and positive views are often formed by how something is described, but research by Dr. Alison Ledgerwood shows that it is a human tendency to get stuck in the negative mindframe. Join us for a discussion about positive and negative mindframes, what research says about them, and tactics for learning to reverse a negative outlook. In an approachable conversation, Dr. Ledgerw...
Episode 7: Triggers and the layers below an emotion with Elizabeth Hardesty
July 26, 2020 04:00 - 53 minutes - 36.9 MBSomething happens and you begin to feel a particular way. This is a trigger and what you feel is an emotion. But what do you do next to respond from a place of emotional well-being? In this episode, mental health counselor Elizabeth Hardesty shares the techniques she uses to help her clients dig deeper into an emotion. Learn about the iceberg technique, where you investigate what meanings, beliefs, and needs you may have around an emotion. Through this technique, you can learn to work thro...
Episode 6: Why Bother: Discovering the Desire for What’s Next by Jennifer Louden
July 19, 2020 04:00 - 45 minutes - 31 MBWhat is it in life that you are bothering to care about? With the onset of COVID-19, life can sometimes seem even more mundane and purposeless. But every person needs a reason, a bother if you will, to care about and to give you purpose in your life. Join us for our discussion with Jennifer Louden as we learn about her most recent book, Why Bother: Discover the Desire for What’s Next. Jennifer gives simple and practical ideas to help open yourself up to finding what it is you want to do in...
Episode 5: COVID-19 and trauma with Dr. Madeleine De Little
July 12, 2020 04:00 - 54 minutes - 37.4 MBIt was inevitable that a once-in-a-lifetime pandemic would impact our health and affect our emotional wellbeing. In this episode, Dr. Madeleine De Little, a trauma expert, shares about the impact of COVID-19 on our mental health. As Dr. De Little shares, trauma with a capital T is one big event, however, there are small traumas that happen to us on a daily basis—not realizing how they impact our wellbeing. With COVID-19, we’re afraid of getting sick and the way we interact with others has ...
Episode 4: Emotional Eating and COVID-19 with Dr. Heather Gallivan
July 05, 2020 04:00 - 36 minutes - 25.1 MBEverywhere in the world, food brings people together. With restaurants closing and limited gatherings, COVID-19 has significantly changed the way that we interact with food and with each other. It has also affected, and maybe exaggerated, how we personally relate to food. In this episode, we hear from Dr. Heather Gallivan, Clinical Director of the Melrose Center. Dr. Gallivan shares how COVID-19 has impacted our relationship with food. She also provides practical tips for working toward a ...
Episode 2: What emotional well-being is with Debbie Laaser
June 28, 2020 04:00 - 56 minutes - 38.6 MBTo begin the journey towards emotional wellbeing, it’s important to understand why we have emotions and what they tell us. To help us better define emotional wellbeing, we talk to Debbie Laaser, who is a licensed marriage and family therapist. Not only will she help us understand the benefits of emotional health, but she will also share about how learning to listen to our own needs is one of the first important steps on the wellbeing journey. In this episode, we cover all the basics of em...
Episode 3: Financial psychology with Dr. Megan McCoy
June 28, 2020 04:00 - 47 minutes - 32.3 MBFinancial wellbeing is an important factor that influences our emotional wellness. Financial stress happens to everyone, but there are ways to cope with the anxieties that might arise because of it. Understanding our own views and beliefs around money is the first step toward financial wellbeing. On this episode, Dr. Megan McCoy joins us to discuss the various psychological views individuals hold about money called money scripts. She shares how our beliefs around money impacts our relations...
Episode 1: But really, how are you? Introduction with CoryAnn Kleinhaus
June 19, 2020 13:00 - 9 minutes - 6.79 MBIf you’re big into emotional wellness, we have just the right podcast for you! Welcome to the premier of “But Really, How Are You?” We created this podcast to help people (myself included) learn, grow, and gain more knowledge about emotional wellness. In today’s show, I covered some of the questions you might have about the podcast as well as a few exciting projects we’re working on that you might find beneficial. Our hope is you’d be able to recognize and understand your emotions better w...
Episode 1: But Really, How Are You? introduction with CoryAnn Kleinhaus
June 19, 2020 13:00 - 9 minutes - 6.8 MBWelcome to the premier of “But Really, How Are You?” — a podcast focused on emotional wellbeing! We created this podcast to help people (myself included) learn, grow, and gain more knowledge about how to better understand our emotions and their impact on daily life. In today’s show, I cover what our podcast is all about as well as a few of our other exciting projects that will help in this journey. Our hope is you’d be able to better recognize and understand your emotions with each episod...