Friendshipping!

OK Mildred

My friend sends me extremely long text messages. Paragraphs and paragraphs. All the time. Can I clue her in that this is a little much for me? This one's got advice, a little bit of Love is Blind, a little bit of politics, some quotes from literature, everything you could ever want. CW: at 3:00 min, hyperbolic cancer mention; discussion of politics; brief mention of COVID-19.

Find Your Moon Shirt

How can I get more comfortable in group settings? How can I feel more relaxed and unlearn some of my conversational go-to's? This episode is mostly about Love is Blind, Mick Jagger, and wearing your best shirt!

A Lunar Eclipse Happens

We've got a listener who is new to town! "I (he/him, gay) was lucky enough to graduate from college and move to Chicago. How do I go about finding Hobbies for Gays™ that I’m interested in? How have you made and found friends after getting out of school?" Here's some ideas for meeting new people and finding a community. CW: repeated use of the word 'penis' in the first three minutes.

Double-fisting Fire

"I told my best friend not to share my pronouns with his parents so they don't tell MY parents, but he did anyway. How can I move forward from this?" This week's episode is all about boundaries, respect, and privacy, with a little metal smithing thrown in for good measure. Do better, Jared!!! CW: depression (brief), gender identities.

Dad's Power Tools

"I’m throwing a Galentine’s Day party. I’m not sure if I should invite my (AFAB, she/they) non-binary friend. How can I do this without making them feel misgendered?" How timely! Includes discussion about Birds of Prey and our absolute perfect taste in movies. CWs: gender discussion, genitalia mentions, discussion of sexual assault portrayals in movies, Trin lists several queer stereotypes in a row (humorous intent).

Rich Euro Aunt

Do you have to make nice and visit with your distant family members? In this episode we discuss your obligations, if any, to your family and buds. Frankly, you gotta wonder: what's the point of having an aunt in Europe if you can't jet off to Paris. CWs: frank homophobia discussion, parents, transphobia, racism mentions.

Don't Email My Wife

"My friend is undergoing a volatile divorce. It's making him angry and impatient, and he's even made a few jabs at me. How do I handle this?" Allow us to give you permission to take a break from your friends! Put 'em on ice for now! And don't miss another gripping Pop Culture Corner. CW: divorce, break-ups, depression, size/weight, and shopping with your mother

Gooey Weird Things

"I've become friends with my massage therapist, and now when I go in for an appointment, we end up just hanging out instead of giving me the massage I need!" Here's an episode about boundaries with friends who also provide a professional service for you. There's a very minor spoiler for the show CHEER in the first ten minutes (it's not really a spoiler, but just incase). Please note strong content warnings for sex and vaginas.

Trash to Treasure To Trash

We hear from a listener in an open marriage who wants to maybe make a move on a new friend. This episode's got everything: Oscar snubs, metalworking class, make a haiku together, and even some advice. Content warnings for marriage discussion, dating, sex.

Tallahassee vs. The World

Do you HAVE to be friends with your partners friends? No, you do not. Look, some friendships just aren't meant to work out. Just people are meant to be polite acquaintances and that's A-OK. This episode is about deciding not to struggle through a makeshift, forced relationship. You have enough to worry about. Content warnings for discussion of insecurities!

Don't be a Flat Earther

It Better Be Gay

This one's about people who flake. Some friends just don't show up when they say they will. Some friends are unreliable. When's the right time to cut the cord and move on? Let's discuss! Please note: content warning for discussion of parent death.

Friends With Absolutely No benefits Whatsoever

A question older than Father Time: Can I be friends with my ex? SHOULD I be friends with my ex? In this case, we're here to give you a resounding and loving "no."

Always With The Pissing

A listener wants to know how to be a better roommate, especially because her roommate is too midwestern to say what they need! Meanwhile, Jenn & Trin go places they have never been before. Stick around to the end for this one, folks. Content warnings: around 33:00, the word penis is mentioned roughly 500 times.

Two Wood for One Sheep

"I am going to be a bridesmaid next year for a friend. The problem is, this friend has some very offensive things about another friends of ours--like doubting her struggles with suicidal thoughts and depression." This one's about handling (or NOT HANDLING) a friend who is being incredibly unkind! We also dive into that Twitter thread about the template. You know the one! (Content warnings for broad discussion of mental health, depression, suicide.)

For Clearer Skin, Pour Ranch Dressing On Yourself

This week, we tackle: "I'm in a group chat and one of the participants has blocked me. We used to be friends, but we're not any longer. I hate that she thinks I'm toxic because I'm not the same person I was back then." Some people don't want to be your friend. This hurts. This sucks. No denying that. But fortunately there are about 8 billion other people on the planet. Here are some thoughts on moving on from mistakes, learning, growing, you know the deal. Content warnings: discussio...

Hey You Funky Gals

"My friend's boyfriend won't leave me alone on Instagram." This episode is literally about someone sliding into your DMs. Listen as we become physically and emotionally overheated! Content warnings for discussions of harassment and misogyny.

Taking Emo Seriously

Collaborating with your pals! Sometimes it goes poorly! The question: “I was working on a professional project with my friend. She completely botched the deadline and really let me down. How do I move forward from here?” Counter question: How do we get Jimmy Eat World on our show? Content warnings: 5:02 mentions of fetish, racism. 17:30 animal death, environmental distress. 34:30 balls!

Let It Be Awkward

"I have a friend who brags about himself constantly. Every other conversation he starts is about how desirable, intelligent, or successful he is." We've got follow-up questions, such as: "What's it like to have positive self-esteem?" and "So which coast are you from?" Some advice snuck itself in there too.

You Might Enjoy Fun

What if you don't like the person your friend is dating? Can you speak up? Let's discuss the many shades of this very common and confusing topic. Plus. intriguing update on the snail front! Content warning for light sexual content throughout. Gross bug from 9m40s to 10m46s.

Reach Across the Aisle to Slap ‘Em in the Face

Trin is mad online, Jenn finally meets Trin’s snails, and capitalism ruins the party yet again. What can you do about friends who continually try to entrap you into selling crap (makeup, jewelry, Tupperware, sex toys, etc) with them? Shouldn't there be laws regulating this kind of thing? Why do we even have a government? Content warning 14m05s - 15m30s where we complain about sex toy parties and make several graphic jokes about penises.

When Your Roomba Runs Away

Trin cleans off her fire escape, Jenn unloads her feelings about her former neighbors, and together your humble narrators make a stabbing attempt to answer this question: How do I decide who to be friends with? Who is worth investing my time in? Strong language warning for 7:40 to 8:12. Thank you to a listener for sending us pins from your Esty shop! https://www.etsy.com/market/juniper_moon

Snailbiters

Jenn shares what is delighting her this week, Trin manages her snail eggs, and a listener writes us to ask if it's OK that she doesn't have or want friends because she just is too exhausted between work and parenting. Is friendship even worth the effort? What if you just don't have energy to socialize? Can you just not have any friends? Is that bad? Is that OK? Do you want to name our book or what?

Reintroduce the Cats

Great question this week. A listener asks, "How do I know when I'm wanted in social situations? How can I tell?" We've got first-hand insight into this one, as well as snail eggs, night lotion, and hey, do you want to name our book for us? Please and thanks!

Snail Baby Registry

A listener brought a friend into her D&D group. New friend is not really acclimating so well. In fact, the other folks want him out! How can you smooth things over here? Should you even?! Content warning for mention of death at 28:27.

Underwear On Your Arm

A listener wrote us and said they made a bunch of positive life changes and now feel like they need to leave their old group of friends. But first we want to ask: are you sure you should do that? Content warnings: discussions of prisons, brief mention of violence

Succulents and Ferns

Best friends, college buds, road trip friends... you can be all of these things! Or none of them! This week, a listener wrote in after they took a hard look at a decades-long friendship and found that it just wasn't what he thought it was. Their old friend just doesn't initiate convos or hang-outs or seem to love them quite the same! Let's discuss having friends who don't treat you quite as you hoped. (Content warnings for brief mention of blood. Raw-doggin’ snails. Trin singing Marv...

Sharks With Dream Powers

A listener lended out her favorite kitchen mixer to a friend who has not given it back. And this friend now also has a crush on her! We love this question very much. We also love snails, sharks, the ocean, fish tubes, all of it, everything.

Sorry to Muffy

Scooters are all the rage! And by that we mean, they're making us feel rage. This week, we heard from a listener who wants to know how to move on from a past hurt: years ago, her friends didn't give her the help she asked for. What now? What do?

Dang Good Losers

Jenn got married, Trin's snails are happy, and a listener loves to play board games with her friends but is feeling a liitttlee uneasy about how she keeps losing at them. Allow us, two certified losers, to help you with this. [Content warnings 2m41-56s - sex mention; 7m17-25s climate emergency mention. Food mentions throughout intro. We throw around “stupid” a lot in this episode.]

Being a Jagweed Online

Jenn has a nemesis, Trin's snails continue to enjoy their retirement, and a listener wants to know how to make friends and connections online--because their boss wants them to. Uggghhh.

G-g-g-gaaaayyy?????

What do you do when you think a friend is crushing on you? Do you speak up? Let it go? We have thoughts. Trin’s snails are doing well btw.

Drop Out Of School, Watch TV

What do you do when you meet a new friend who seems great, but then plants a few red flags? Do you write them off completely? Does anyone want some snails?

Iguanas, 16 of them

A listener doesn't want to be chummy with their new colleagues. We understand! We're also going to challenge you juuust a little, though. Content warning for discussions of social biases, brief mention of racial stereotyping.

Talk Nice To Yourself

Jenn's softball team is being bullied online, Trin visits a spa, and a listener asks how to adjust their inner monologue so they can be be kinder to themselves and their friends. What a lovely idea. You're doing the right thing with your face, by the way. Content warnings this week: discussions of body, fitness, self-esteem.

The Poison and The Antidote

This week, we heard from an awesome listener who wants to support a friend who is receiving bad treatment from her family for being gay. Strong content warnings for homophobia, discussion of religion. We threw in "levity breaks" to add a little laughter back into this stupid world. Timestamps below! Cancer Mention Start time: 1m35s Duration: 4s Being Gross about the word "Engorged" Start Tim3: 3m19s Duration: 6s Levity Break #1 Start Time: 15m21s Duration: 3m45s Levity Break #2 S...

The Poison and The Antidote

This week, we heard from an awesome listener who wants to support a friend who is receiving bad treatment from her family for being gay. Strong content warnings for homophobia, discussion of religion. We threw in "levity breaks" to add a little laughter back into this stupid world. Timestamps below! Cancer Mention Start time: 1m35s Duration: 4s Being Gross about the word "Engorged" Start Tim3: 3m19s Duration: 6s Levity Break #1 Start Time: 15m21s Duration: 3m45s Levity Break #2 Start Time:...

Crashing on Couches

If a friend is visiting the city you live, are you supposed to show them around? Let them crash on your couch? Skip work to hang out together? Really, what are your obligations as a host? We've got answers to this and also quick mentions of vomit from 4:00 to 6:00, feel free to skip that part.

Scouting DILFs at Home Depot

A few dedicated listeners asked us to lighten things up and talk about ourselves for some reason. Careful what you wish for. This week, no advice. Instead, plants, sinus infections, some new projects we're working on(!!!), and finally, FINALLY, we grapple with cinematic masterpiece Detective Pikachu.

Pretend You Have A Broken Penis

Let's get META. Our first asker wants to know the best way to ask us a question without giving away their identity, so we went through some best practices when asking us for advice. The next asker is about to embark on the journey of therapy, and wants to know how to do therapy correctly. CW: mention of animal death, mention of penis injury. If you don't care to hear our animal stories, skip to 12m57s for advice.

Lube it Up Downtown

My friend has terrible etiquette on Twitter--what do I do? Am I a bad friend if I delete Facebook altogether and sometimes miss birthday notifications? This episode it's about friendship and social media. Listen as we try to convince you to never subtweet again! Content warnings: we get into discussion of pregnancy in the first eight minutes or so.

A Little Bit of Give, A Little Bit of Take

- My friend uses social media to brag about how busy she is with work. - I was offered a job at a toxic company. My friends keep telling me not to take it, but I need to! This week, it's all about: being annoyed that your friends might be working too much; letting your friends make their own life decisions; and decidedly not grinding yourself down to dust for someone else’s enrichment! Let's do this thang.

Kettlebell Classes and Other Concerns

"I have become flooded with Facebook messages, at all hours of the day and night, with my friend pouring her life out. What do I do?" is our first question. And our second question: "My friend uses Twitter to tell people to kill themselves." This week, we discuss how to put up boundaries and be direct. Content warnings: very brief hypothetical rape mention and fat shaming mentions. Mention of suicide. In-depth discussion of suicidal ideation.

Jorts Season, Baby

We're stoked on spring time and excited to bring you an episode about little bebes. Sometimes you want to hang out with your friend's kids and sometimes you don't. Here are some thoughts on how to be accommodating to your friends who are parents. Minor CW for brief mention of sick children.

Pee Your Pants and Run Away

What do you do when an almost-friend becomes suddenly distant and uninterested? That's our first question. We're here to tell you that it's OK to feel a little bummed. Our second question, now, got us all frazzled and excited: How can I get my friend to stop taking MORTAL RISKS WITH HER LIFE? Check the content warnings for this one: Erections, war, discussion of violence. Geez.

Live at C2E2 2019

A live episode! We swear we're getting better at these. First we consider what we've learned over the years, and then take some questions from listeners, including, "how do I tell my friend I can't afford to donate to all the fundraisers she's organizing?" And don't miss the audience Q&A, which really was wonderful. Thanks for being there.

Wearing Capes For Personal Reasons

Small talk gets a bad rep. People think it's boring and awkward. But! It's actually an important tool! This week, we hear from listeners who want to improve their active listening skills, especially when it comes to meeting people you REALLY ADMIRE AND YOU JUST LOVE THEIR WORK OMG!

Wearing Capes For Personal Reasons

Small talk gets a bad rep. People think it's boring and awkward. But! It's actually an important tool! This week, we hear from listeners who want to improve their active listening skills, especially when it comes to meeting people you REALLY ADMIRE AND YOU JUST LOVE THEIR WORK OMG!

Walk Around Like A Happy Rooster

This week, our listeners just need a little nudge in the right direction. Our first asker wants to know how to make friends online. Luckily, we are very online! Our second asker wants to know how to meet folks while volunteering at an animal shelter. Let's do this thang.

You're My Best Friend, But I'm Not Yours

This week we tackle something pretty common in adult friendships - you feel that you have a best friend, but you're not THEIR best friend in return. Not as depressing as it sounds, we promise!