Finding You: An Evoke Therapy Podcast
998 episodes - English - Latest episode: 1 day ago - ★★★★★ - 133 ratingsEvoke Therapy Programs is an experientially based therapeutic program serving adolescents, young adults, parents, couples, and families. Email the host [email protected]
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Episodes
Trauma and Codependency - Ep 616
July 10, 2024 19:39 - 1 hour - 58.7 MBDr. Reedy explores the definition and origins of Codependency. He explains that the root of codependency is the way parents and other big people talk to and respond to the child. Codependency is a modern term that encompasses anxious attachment styles. He explains that codependency is NOT the cause of addiction in another but rather is at the core of all addictions. He teaches that healing codependency does not cure another person’s addiction but only resolves the codependency in the individu...
Be Curious About a Child’s Behavior (Q&A) - Ep 615
July 03, 2024 23:57 - 52 minutes - 47.7 MBDr. Reedy takes live questions from audience members on the how to respond to a child that won’t open up and when it is okay to take a vacation from the work in therapy.
Aftercare and Transitions - Ep 614
June 28, 2024 23:06 - 1 hour - 59.4 MBDr. Reedy talks about how aftercare is the key to a successful treatment intervention. He also talks about the pitfalls and vulnerabilities we encounter during any transition.
Mindfulness and Psychotherapy - Ep 613
June 22, 2024 00:08 - 54 minutes - 49.6 MBLargely drawing from the book with the same name by Thich Nhat Hanh, Dr. Reedy explains mindfulness as a boarder idea than what people think of when considering mindfulness. He explains how therapy is a “talking mindfulness” practice. He explains several tenants on Buddhism including impermanence, non-duality, inter-being, and radical acceptance. He also clarifies that what Buddhists refer to as the concept of “non-attachment” is synonymous with the characteristic in psychology associated wit...
Attachment Theory in Therapy (Q&A) - Ep 612
June 20, 2024 00:01 - 49 minutes - 45.7 MBDr. Reedy talks about how when we accept ourselves and are able to see who we are, we are able to move forward. Conversely, thinking of mental health in terms of being completely free of our issues is a breeding ground for denial. He talks about how guilt and shame are at the crux of so many of our dilemmas. He explains attachment theory and how it is thought of in the therapeutic relationship. He explains how we listen when we can and it is absolutely okay to set a boundary and remove ourse...
Technology Addiction - Ep 611
June 14, 2024 19:47 - 1 hour - 64.9 MBDr. Reedy talks about the new epidemic in addiction: technology addiction. He covers some of the science behind game and technology design and how developers are using the most up-to-date and sophisticated science to hook their users. He explains how these designs, focused on dopamine and need for an individual’s sense of wellbeing, prey upon the chemical reaction when we experience a connection to others. He explains how nature-based therapy and mindfulness and starting early are keys in our...
Loving All of You: An Interview with Esin Pinarli - Ep 610
June 12, 2024 15:58 - 1 hour - 57.5 MBDr. Reedy welcomes Esin Pinarli to the podcast, Esin is a psychotherapist, licensed clinical social worker (LCSW), and a Master’s Level Certified Addiction Professional (MCAP) specializing in IMAGO, brainspotting, Internal Family Systems (IFS), Somatic practices, and psychodrama. Through an integrative experiential approach, she helps individuals, couples, and families suffering from anxiety, depression, addiction, codependency, trauma, dysfunctional family system dynamics, and relational att...
Mothers and Guilt (Q&A) - Ep 609
June 06, 2024 15:59 - 44 minutes - 40.8 MBDr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience. He discusses the challenges when a spouse doesn’t want to go to therapy. He explores the dynamics in our culture around expectations of mothers and how guilt can be the barrier to improved mental health. And he further explains how the suicidal impulse can be a call to a higher level of consciousness.
How Children Suffer Because of Our Issues (Q&A) - Ep 608
June 04, 2024 21:18 - 41 minutes - 38.3 MBDr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience. He talks about why children take risks on their devices and on social media. He talks about when we take care of ourselves, we can be there for those we love. He talks about how we may need to set strong boundaries with our parents if engaging eth them reaches a certain level of toxicity.
Ego and Soul - Ep 607
May 29, 2024 21:30 - 50 minutes - 46.6 MBDr. Reedy discusses ego and soul and explains how these two ideas represent two primary driving energies. Ego, he explains, is the part of us than manages and represents the conscious mind. Defenses, the need to be right, and gatekeeping the unconscious material are its primary roles or duties. Ego is fear based and operates withing a scarcity mindset. Soul is the whole, authentic, or real self- it is our whole self. It is our wisest knowing, and it is fueled by love – love for self and others.
The Do’s and Don’ts of Co-Parenting - Ep 606
May 22, 2024 18:11 - 1 hour - 64.4 MBDr. Reedy discusses the challenges of co-parenting. He explains how to avoid making things worse. He emphasizes that we “stay on our side of the street” and not become overly focused on the other’s shortcomings.
Parenting Through an Attachment Lens - Ep 606
May 15, 2024 17:01 - 56 minutes - 51.9 MBDr. Reedy discusses attachment, what it takes to provide a secure attachment, and what to consider to prioritize a secure attachment over behavior or symptom management.
Parenting Through an Attachment Lens - Ep 605
May 15, 2024 17:01 - 56 minutes - 51.9 MBDr. Reedy discusses attachment, what it takes to provide a secure attachment, and what to consider to prioritize a secure attachment over behavior or symptom management.
Love and Fear - Ep 604
May 01, 2024 17:12 - 59 minutes - 54.4 MBDr. Reedy explains how love and fear are driving forces in our unconscious, motivating much of our behavior. He explains that we need to learn to distinguish between love and fear and understand when we are taking from others and when and how we can show our love to our children and partners.
Evoke Therapy Intensives for Couples, Parents, and Families - Ep 603
April 25, 2024 02:28 - 53 minutes - 49.3 MBDr. Reedy discusses Evoke’s custom private intensives for couples and families. He explains what make Evoke’s Intensive work different and how we aim to be the experts, not on your life, but on creating a process where you can discover your truth.
Evoke Intensives: What Sets Us Apart - Ep 602
April 17, 2024 04:11 - 1 hour - 54.9 MBDr. Reedy discusses what sets Evoke Therapy Intensives apart from other programs. He explains the clinical model and explains how Evoke uses attachment and the concepts of transference and counter transference.
When Apologizing Doesn’t Work (Q&A) - Ep 601
April 10, 2024 23:22 - 39 minutes - 35.8 MBDr. Reedy takes questions from the audience on what to do if doing your own work and apologizing to your children doesn’t make a difference.
Blocked Care: Regaining Compassion for Your Child - Ep 600
April 05, 2024 16:04 - 53 minutes - 49.1 MBFrom an article by Melissa Corkum and Lisa Qualls, Dr. Reedy discusses what happens when the chronic stress from children struggling with mental health issues bring parents to a point of numbness, disconnection, and shame. He talks about the isolation and shame that comes when a parent loses their ability to feel warmth and love for a struggling child. Dr. Reedy talks about this dynamic in the context of attachment, parental guilt, and self-care. Full article here: https://thearchibaldproject...
Is Taking Care of Yourself Selfish? (Q&A) - Ep 599
April 03, 2024 00:53 - 41 minutes - 38.1 MBDr. Reedy talks takes live questions from the audience and talks about self-care in the context of the child parent dynamic. He talks about looking for a therapist that is patient, kind, and secure. He explains attachment-based therapy and the upcoming Master Class and how the medicine in therapy is the way the therapist is with the client.
Communication Theory and Skills - Ep 598
March 29, 2024 01:20 - 1 hour - 59 MBDr. Reedy talks about communication skills and how “why” we share is more important than the words we use.
Helping Children Move Through Feelings (Q&A) - Ep 597
March 27, 2024 16:00 - 40 minutes - 37 MBDr. Reedy take live questions from the audience. He discusses how to deal with an angry, resentful child. He also talks about what can happen when one spouse doesn’t want to do their therapy work.
Addiction and Self-Medication - Ep 596
March 21, 2024 15:00 - 56 minutes - 52.2 MBAddiction and Self-Medication - Ep 596 by Dr. Brad Reedy
Modeling Change for Our Children (Q&A) - Ep 595
March 20, 2024 15:41 - 53 minutes - 49.3 MBDr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience on the process of wilderness therapy, how to support a family member in treatment, the new book "Bad Therapy," and how to model the change you want to see in your children.
Myth, Story, and the Heroic Journey Inward - Ep 594
March 15, 2024 13:48 - 1 hour - 60.8 MBDr. Reedy talks about how myth and stories provide a template for the heroic journey inward to discover ourselves. He uses this idea to show that our stories and out myths are invitations to look at the lost parts of ourselves so that we can heal and become who we are.
Finding Hope After Mistakes (Q&A) - Ep 593
March 13, 2024 14:53 - 50 minutes - 46.5 MBDr. Reedy answers a question about finding hope and worth after an affair. He talks about how to make a repair with a child who doesn’t want to engage anymore. He explains that our context can be internalized and the way to healing is to spend time with a patient, empathic Other.
How to Find a Therapist - Ep 592
March 06, 2024 18:11 - 58 minutes - 53.6 MBDr. Reedy talks about what to look for in a therapist. He talks about how to recognize a mature therapist who is capable of holding you with compassion and patience. He explains that "the way a therapist is with you" is the medicine. He talks about characteristics of the adequate or "good enough" therapist. He emphasizes that the therapist must first model being human since that is the task in therapy. He explains that if the therapist can hold your anger, frustration, and resistance with lov...
How to Find as Therapist - Ep 592
March 06, 2024 18:11 - 58 minutes - 53.6 MBDr. Reedy talks about what to look for in a therapist. He talks about how to recognize a mature therapist who is capable of holding you with compassion and patience. He explains that "the way a therapist is with you" is the medicine. He talks about characteristics of the adequate or "good enough" therapist. He emphasizes that the therapist must first model being human since that is the task in therapy. He explains that if the therapist can hold your anger, frustration, and resistance with lov...
Let’s Talk About the “Defense” (Q&A) – Ep 591
March 01, 2024 19:09 - 46 minutes - 42.2 MBDr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience. He talks about defenses, where and why they happen, what it feels like when we encounter the defense in ourselves or the Other, and what healing looks like so we don’t need the protection of the defense.
The Eden Project: In Search of the Magical Other by James Hollis (Book Review) - Ep 590
February 28, 2024 16:39 - 57 minutes - 52.5 MBDr. Reedy provide an overview of The Eden Project by James Hollis. He explains how the early stages of romantic love are fraught with pitfalls of projection, blame, and the working out of the unconscious, unexplored parts of ourselves. He talks about the responsibility to live our own life and cease abdicating our chief responsibility – to individuate and become more whole, more conscious as the pathway to greater intimacy and love in marriage.
How We Love Those Hurting Themselves - Ep 589
February 23, 2024 16:00 - 45 minutes - 41.4 MBDr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience on loving our children when they are hurting themselves and on finding the right kind of therapist for ourselves.
The Teen Whisperer: An Interview with Kirsten Cobabe - Ep 588
February 21, 2024 20:26 - 37 minutes - 34.1 MBThe Teen Whisperer: An Interview with Kirsten Cobabe - Ep 588 by Dr. Brad Reedy
Skills and Self - Ep 587
February 21, 2024 01:59 - 51 minutes - 47.2 MBDr. Reedy talks about the value and limitations of skill-based work and therapy. He talks about how the development of the self is the foundation for deeper change and how that can be accomplished. He posits that the outcome of therapy is that we become who we are.
Owning and Dealing with Your Guilt (Q&A) - Ep 586
February 14, 2024 16:19 - 57 minutes - 52.8 MBDr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience. He discusses that the work isn’t always about learning to put up with more and more, but may be setting boundaries with people in your life. He explains that the primary barriers to higher enlightenment are shame and guilt. He says that the dominant cultures offers erroneous ideas on the subject of becoming and person and loving others. Dr. Reedy explains that enlightenment means that we deal with the parts of ourselves we avoid.
How Al-anon and Coda Help - Ep 585
February 07, 2024 18:06 - 1 hour - 66 MBDr. Reedy discusses Al-anon, Codependency, and how the 12-Steps apply to the non-identified patient. He defines codependency and talks about its connection to attachment and the attachment wound we suffered. He goes through each of the 12 Steps and ties them back to the principles they address. He debunks the excuses people have when resisting attending meetings for themselves.
Shadow Work - Ep 584
January 31, 2024 15:52 - 1 hour - 67.1 MBDr. Reedy discuss the shadow and how the repressed energy of our unconscious impacts our behaviors and relationships. He talks about how to recognize the shadow and how to unpack and heal so that we don’t ask our children and our partners to carry our unconscious, undone work.
Listen to What the Symptom is Saying (Q&A) - Ep 583
January 26, 2024 16:07 - 1 hour - 55.4 MBDr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience on dealing with children who fight, co-parenting, and learning how to love. He explains that before we try to eradicate behaviors in our children, we learn to listen to them to hear the untold story of the child’s dilemma.
Repairing Fractures with Your Children - Ep 582
January 19, 2024 17:08 - 1 hour - 55.7 MBDr. Reedy discusses repairing relationships in the context of attachment. He emphasizes that repair, forgiveness and reconciliation come on the terms and the timeline of the person who was hurt. He talks about the ego and how we need to let it die to mature and grow.
Parenting with Older Children (Q&A) - Ep 581
January 17, 2024 19:43 - 35 minutes - 32.9 MBDr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience on parenting older children: what is different and what is the same. He talks about what boundaries sound like and how the measure of a good boundary is not in how the child or other person responds.
A New Take on Goals and Resolutions - Ep 580
January 12, 2024 22:30 - 48 minutes - 44.5 MBDr. Reedy explores the problems with setting goals and measuring our progress. He explains that goals often need to be altered, surrendered, and discarded. He gives a list of goals that relate to being and growing in contrast to goals which point towards arriving.
Good Parenting is its Own Reward - Ep 579
January 11, 2024 17:47 - 57 minutes - 53 MBDr. Reedy takes live questions from audience members who have tried everything, and they are still not able to reach their child. He talks about the goals of healthy parenting: peace, confidence, clarity…he also explains how the goal in therapy is not to become “better,” but to become yourself.
Understanding How Human Development Leads to Compassion - Ep 578
January 05, 2024 18:14 - 52 minutes - 47.9 MBDr. Reedy explains various models of human development and how they lead to a more compassionate understanding of mental illness in our children. He explains how parents are often going through a parallel process with their children of individuation and identity development.
“My Child is Avoiding Their Work” (Q&A) - Ep 577
January 03, 2024 17:37 - 50 minutes - 45.9 MB“My Child is Avoiding Their Work” (Q&A) - Ep 577 by Dr. Brad Reedy
Oppositional Defiant Disorder, Rebellion and the Cure - Ep 576
December 29, 2023 22:56 - 1 hour - 71 MBOppositional Defiant Disorder, Rebellion and the Cure - Ep 576 by Dr. Brad Reedy
School Refusal – A Post Pandemic Look - Ep 575
December 15, 2023 16:23 - 1 hour - 64.1 MBDr. Reedy discusses school refusal. He considers behavioral modification 9in the context of what we know about trauma informed approaches. He encourages parents to be flexible and look for the root issues when dealing with school refusal.
You Are the Problem and the Solution (Q&A) - Ep 574
December 13, 2023 17:18 - 55 minutes - 50.6 MBDr. Reedy takes live questions from the audience. He talks about staying connected to yourself and how our anger and resentment are signals to set better boundaries. The talks about how parents must put themselves first if they are to love and compassionately care for their children and others.
An Interview with Parent Coach Andy Goldstrom - Ep 573
December 12, 2023 16:54 - 40 minutes - 37.2 MBDr. Brad Reedy welcomes Parent Coach Andy Goldstrom to the podcast. From a career in business, to a journey supporting a child struggling with mental health issues, Andy brings his passion for helping parents find the tools and empowerment they are looking for while navigating a family's journey towards mental health. Go to www.parentsjourneycoaching.net for more on his work and www.oplm.com and www.skysthelimitfund.org for more information on donations.
Boundaries, Boundaries, Boundaries (& Self-Care) - Ep 572
December 06, 2023 18:19 - 1 hour - 58.4 MBDr. Reedy talks about principles involved in discovering and setting healthy boundaries. He explains that boundaries are synonymous with - or come out of - self-care. He warns against trying to explain your boundaries and using boundaries to change other people.
Choosing How to Die (Q&A) - Ep 571
December 01, 2023 17:08 - 48 minutes - 44 MBChoosing How to Die (Q&A) - Ep 571
Communication and Differentiation - Ep 570
November 29, 2023 19:28 - 1 hour - 59.1 MBCommunication and Differentiation - Ep 570 by Dr. Brad Reedy
Parenting: The Wisdom to Know the Difference (Q&A) - Ep 569
November 17, 2023 17:00 - 56 minutes - 51.6 MBDr. Reedy takes live questions on difficult parenting issues. He talks about learning what is inside of our control and how to face life threatening dilemmas with our children. He talks about understanding the boundaries between self and others and unlearning what we learned about love and life as a way towards greater enlightenment.