Booty Machine: daily experimental guitar and bass podcast
365 episodes - English - Latest episode: over 16 years ago - ★★★★ - 2 ratingsVinston comes and adds his touch to the daily Bass O Matic podcast from Z ( www.bassomatic.info ).
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Episodes
Eleven jumps and the nice lady goes
April 24, 2007 23:00 - 1.98 MBHappy. That's how Jeff felt about his evening ride to the disco. He was feeling frivolous and bounced all over the dance floor. And to his great surprise, eleven jumps and the nice lady goes horny.
The sausage master
April 23, 2007 23:00 - 2.52 MBIn the cage you could feel the chill. The beasts are hardly manageable, and the faintest drop of sweat will just make you a perfect bait. Gladfully, Harold was the sausage master, he was the only one to master them in every occasion.
You could fetch the butter croissant
April 22, 2007 23:00 - 3.46 MBTo be polite you could fetch the butter croissant. But err on the face of all the manners you try to elaborate and your profile will loose all credibility, including the one with the croissant.
The trees salute you
April 21, 2007 23:00 - 1.77 MBI like to run in the morning. I like to look at the sky. I wish sometimes I where a bird, that I could fly. I am all nuts. And that is when the trees salute you.
Streets of London in bad weather
April 20, 2007 23:00 - 1.54 MBNothing beats the beating you can get from the rain, the penetrating coldness of a thick british fog. You may like fish and chips, and all will match nicely together, you like the streets of London in bad weather.
Ole la vache est de retour
April 19, 2007 23:00 - 1.62 MBThis is not an ordinary cow. She did it all, climbed the everest, the k2, had gone to space, ran the marathon, and even survived the feria. She was proud but showed it with a classy subtility. This was Ole, and ole la vache est de retour.
Despite the weather take a hotdog
April 18, 2007 23:00 - 1.17 MBFor weeks it had rained. This was an exceptional time of the year when the elements would go through you, freeze you in a incredible humidity making you feel like if you where swimming in a cold pond. Anita, as only a vengerous spanish rebel could speak was direct: despite the weather take a hotdog.
Tunafish can make an easy pet
April 17, 2007 23:00 - 1.38 MBShe had long ago decided to switch her chihuhaha (who can spell that correctly, hm) for one of those hip new tunafishes from the petgrocery on fifth avenue. Tunafish can make an easy pet, and they are gentle too.
The tulips are growing
April 16, 2007 23:00 - 2.59 MBThis is a great feeling. It has finally happened, and as everytime the sun puts its hand onto the job, thing come true. The tulips are growing, and this is really a great sight.
Take the next elevator on the left just before you get out
April 15, 2007 23:00 - 2.12 MBYou're lost. Let me help you. You know, the path you followed yesterday to get your coffee. Well, just take the next elevator on the left just before you get out. There it will be.
Level it out with envy
April 14, 2007 23:00 - 3.33 MBGot tired of competing with your workmates. Instead of trying to be better or stronger or whatever, just level it out with envy, it'll make you feel good. Yes, it's true!
Drilling your way through clay
April 13, 2007 23:00 - 2.1 MBAt a time when all seems important is personal carreer, it is a fact that drilling your way through clay can be rewarding. It will also really impress your secretary.
Will it tell me anything
April 12, 2007 23:00 - 1.67 MBThis is a sponge. I use it to scrub my back, sometimes. It is rather soft, and once soapy makes for a rather comfy and efficient back scrubber. But will it tell me anything if I ask it gently?
Cervelas is not a quiche but a kind of sausage
April 11, 2007 23:00 - 1.19 MBQuiche looks like a pizza with more stuff on it. Sometimes you can find pizza with sausage on, or respectively quiche with sausage on it. Don't hesitate however to be firm and state that cervelas is not a quiche but a kind of sausage, and that you will likely never find any on a pizza.
Pride in repetitive behaviour
April 10, 2007 23:00 - 2.11 MBNever mind what others say. I could move my feet back and forth, drag my leg in always the same task, rotate my neck round and round, I will always have pride in repetitive behaviour, and that's how I feel good. Try it.
High heels and a baguette
April 09, 2007 23:00 - 1.98 MBFrench and sexy is not a goal so hard to reach for most women living in the hexagonal country. Simply wear your high heels and a baguette, and you'll just look as good as you can get. Just beware that the baguette needs to be held with class as many other possibilities could be thought of but not very polite.
Level it up with mjama
April 08, 2007 23:00 - 860 KBCommon man, you know you where a bit harsh on him regarding the affair. Still you should have made things clear. You should definitely level it up with mjama. But stay cool.
Crunch the herd
April 07, 2007 23:00 - 1.16 MBTo gain a substantial amount of space you have a few practical options. First, you can reduce the size of your herd. Take a few out and you'll get something lighter for your out in the prairie rundowns. Otherwise there is the always fun to do, crunch the herd method. A little sadistic, but so, oh so efficient and humorous.
Rap the carrots
April 06, 2007 23:00 - 1.54 MBIn no other langage than French can new musical trends be of such an arrogance to rabbits. For example if you say rap the carrots to a French rabbit, he will show you what it means to mess around with his pride.
Take the third door after the elevator
April 05, 2007 23:00 - 1.36 MBI knew you wanted to go and visit Alphonso the royal oak alligator. He works at the top of the Stanley Humby liver building. Just take the third door after the elevator, there he'll be.
Porcupine dreams of sweet pumpkin
April 04, 2007 23:00 - 1.44 MBWorking on the field for an impressive twenty years, doc Smithymomokaskoviak has been able to dig deep into the porcupine's unconscious mechanism. Using his models and behavioural tools to go beyond our common knowledge, he was able to state for sure that the porcupine dreams od sweet pumpkin. No less.
Airplanes to go where ever you want
April 03, 2007 23:00 - 1.54 MBThis is really a neat feature. She was impressed. Nowhere else did she found such an attractive offer. For long had she been unsatisfied with her week end club life, but know she had learnt that in Zeberzuviskovinskevia there where airplanes to go where ever you want, and for less too.
Latin rabbit
April 02, 2007 23:00 - 1.62 MBNeed say more. He's a latin rabbit. There is however an spelling problem. Does rabbit take one or two b's? Hmm.
Sixteen times around town
April 01, 2007 23:00 - 2.28 MBThis is a small town. But hey, sixteen times around town isn't nothing. If you calculate the total length of one, it comes to approximatively 15 kilometers, so wow, just multiply this by sixteen and think how boring this must have been for them.
Drums are a plenty
March 31, 2007 23:00 - 1.31 MBIn a symphonic orchestra you will rarely find anything like it. You can expect some mean grouping of violins and other stringies, but rarely a complete set of modern drums, double pedal and all. While this holds true for a chamber orchestra too, in a funk band drums are a plenty.
Road to yellow tank brigade
March 30, 2007 23:00 - 1.12 MBFirst on the left, 12 miles north, 100 yards on the left, follow the dotted red line, up the mountains, down on the other side for about 7.3 miles, turn after the big dead tree (there is only one), look for an old rusty tractor abandoned on the right side, this is the road to yellow tank brigade.
Pineapple confettis and cream
March 29, 2007 23:00 - 1.42 MBTrue, there is no s at the end of confetti. It is already plural in italian. Ok, but this is not very important. What is is that fantastic dessert that are pineapple confettis and cream, or if you prefer, you purist, pineapple confetti and cream.
Take your tooth out of my leg
March 28, 2007 23:00 - 1.16 MBYou know I don't have anything against you, I even do enjoy your sense of humor sometimes. You do have a chic sense of party, but this is too much, please take your tooth out of my leg.
Mucho grando biggo enormusso
March 27, 2007 23:00 - 1.99 MBIn most anglo-european langages, it is simple to say something is great. In Hoppoleggononoyoho dialect it is a bit longer, but this is a langage poets love. You want to tackle a poet carreer, try: mucho grano biggo enormusso. This is how to say it.
Catch up yes time
March 26, 2007 23:00 - 1.38 MBBe quick to respond. This is only a limited time offer. If you send an email fast with your coordinates to the underscribed unknown non-functional address, and we get it, you will catch up yes time, yes, yes time.
Take a slice of pie
March 25, 2007 23:00 - 1.49 MBYou're hungry, don't be shy. Take a slice of pie. It's full of meat, cheese and onion. It was freshly baked and still has the crusty feeling to it, just waiting for your teeth to bite.
The program was too dry or hot or both
March 24, 2007 23:00 - 2.17 MBProgramming takes a lot of dexterity, even from Dexter. This guy was shallow. He thought big of himself but couldn't fool his roommates. He did some programming on his time off, but the program was to dry, or hot, or both.
Impossible monophonic note
March 23, 2007 23:00 - 1.54 MBTake two trumpets, one saxophone, a tuba, a few clarinets, and try this out. You will find it rather impossible to get that impossible monophonic note. Impossible.
Snakes in the banana box
March 22, 2007 23:00 - 1.26 MBMoving from a flat to another, every once and then, to get your mind some fresh air, to clean all the angry souvenirs, to make things seem so much better, at least for a few weeks. And even thought sometimes there are snakes in the banana box.
Live to your full potential or take a glass of milk
March 21, 2007 23:00 - 1.46 MBBe serious. Stop talking nonesense. Get your stuff together and do it. This is the time. Live to your full potential or take a glass of milk.
Mojito on the rocks with lemon
March 20, 2007 23:00 - 1010 KBThirsty? We have what you need to satisfy you. Get down to our fantastic bar, say hello to our wonderful barmen and barmaids, and check out that radical mojito on the rocks with lemon.
Samba libre move your babay
March 19, 2007 23:00 - 1.35 MBWhen you want to say something stupid, something that means nothing but sounds cool, try the following phrase: samba libre move your babay.
Pancakes are made of flour
March 18, 2007 23:00 - 1.54 MBToday, most of us think pancakes grow on trees. No. Let's be clear about this. Pancakes are not made out of old recycled tires neither. They aren't made in hard steel, pancakes are made of flour, essentially.
Ugly duck cantonese style
March 17, 2007 23:00 - 1.26 MBFables and culinary art can mix. Yes, does anyone know about these few receipes that can make all your guests oh so happy. Let's take the ugly duckling cantonese style, or the lesser delicatessen ugly duck cantonese style. They are always a success.
He won her playing poker
March 16, 2007 23:00 - 2.02 MBNo romantism here. He liked her, she didn't care. There where a few pretending men. They played and he won her playing poker. Simply, and she still didn't care.
The week has been rude
March 15, 2007 23:00 - 1.55 MBMonday started rather well, with all the usual work from the week-end easily wiped off. Tuesday was as usual, with no real surprises, calm. Wednesday a bit more surprising with a few last-minute appointments to clear. Thursday was hopeful as the week-end got near. Friday is here to tell us all the week has been rude and the next might be too.
Fantasy made of playa and islands
March 14, 2007 23:00 - 2.04 MBThe smiling faces of tourists are what makes the travel agent purr with content. All they need is a bit of a dream come true, all they want is a bit of a fantasy made of playa and islands.
Twentyfive and all the chives
March 13, 2007 23:00 - 2.3 MBGetting old is an everyday job. Today Joe is going twenty five. It is the golden age for an active businessman like him. His carreer is wide open to him and his expectation can be high. It's twentyfive and all the chives.
A bear with ears is a bear that hears
March 12, 2007 23:00 - 1.73 MBThe little white rabbit was confident he could get along with the old Joe bear. He thougt he could go on farting his little carrot farts, the odorless ones, without bothering him. But, wrong he was, oh so wrong, he heard him and a bear with ears is a bear that hears.
This is Jake walking
March 11, 2007 23:00 - 2.14 MBDreaming that she might be coming tonight, he does have a few hopes. He already had tried a few times to get to know her better, but the occasion has never been comfortable enough. Today he felt more confident. This is Jake walking, he is happy end hopes well.
Terrible extra midget slug
March 10, 2007 23:00 - 1.35 MBSlugs have a strict code of conduct. According to their individual talent and caracter, they will expect to have a job position where they can express themeselves best. The terrible extra midget slug could readily expect to sell soft ice at the local luba park.
The cactus was not where it should
March 09, 2007 23:00 - 1.72 MBThe desert is dry, is hot. The sand followed the wind. A few birds of prey where cruising around in the search of some carcass. Everything was as usual, except for the cactus. The cactus was not where it should. Someone had to do something.
Rumble in the basement, stay home
March 08, 2007 23:00 - 1.26 MBLike when in an earthquake, the earth was vibrating. The windows didn't break but the distorted views through the glass gave some weird appearance to the usually calm neighbourhood. Outside, it was chaos. Rumble in the basement, stay home.
This is not a snail even if it looks like
March 07, 2007 23:00 - 776 KBSlow, brown, with two telescopic eyes, making bubbles along its path, going forth like a snake but without all of its glory, this is not a snail even if it looks like.
Eightyfive kilometers an hour
March 06, 2007 23:00 - 2.07 MBThe whistling of the turbo was constant, the rumor coming from the exhaust pipe added the rest. What a sensation you did get with this fantastic convertible. The roar of the eight cylinders, back and forth, sliding and thumping like precisely. Eightyfive kilometers an hour where nothing, what was left was plentyful.