Husband In Law
221 episodes - English - Latest episode: 17 days ago - ★★★★★ - 268 ratingsConnect with the Husband In Law crew: https://theboldlogic.com/boldetin
Hey Friend! If you are new here, be sure to start with Episode One. This is not your typical podcast and you aren’t going to want to miss a thing! Jessica, Steve (her gay ex-husband) and Matt (her current husband) are sharing their stories of love, marriage, infidelity, divorce, coming out, remarriage and co-parenting to help others know they are not alone. This podcast is for those who are open-minded enough to let go of the religious and social norms we have been taught we should fit into and live a life that feels true and authentic to who they are. Steve, Jessica, and Matt are here to walk through the science of making relationsh!t successful.
Steve and Jessica were happily married for 7 years until Steve came out as being gay which inevitably ended in divorce. Now, Matt and Jessica have been happily married for over 8 years. The crazy part is, Matt, Jessica, and Steve all get along, to the extent that Matt and Steve work together, every dang day… Don’t worry you will get all the details while you listen. Matt, Jessica, and Steve have a relationship that, by most standards, would be considered atypical.
Sharing stories of love, marriage, children, divorce, the struggles of religious norms, homosexuality, and trying to be our best selves, this podcast holds nothing back and shares what most people are scared to talk about.
Listen in as they take you on this journey of learning how to love and accept themselves enough to love and accept others for who they are during this experience called “Life”.
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Episodes
Dear Partner of a Porn "Addict"
October 20, 2021 11:00 - 45 minutes - 42.1 MBHere are some of the main talking points from this episode.: ✨Taking the shame out of your conversations by tempering your reactions and acknowledging your mistakes. ✨Take care of yourself first! ✨Owning your part. Their “issues” might seem bigger but you still need to own your part in the relationship. ✨Sharing with people you and your partner trust. Can’t wait to hear what you think! Get some Be BOLD Swag, pick up a coloring book and take advantage of our other resources at https://t...
Finding Happiness with Elia Gourgouris
October 13, 2021 11:00 - 47 minutes - 43.3 MBThis week we interview a blast from our past, Dr. Elia Gourgouris. If you want to find more happiness in your life, this episode is for you! Dr. Elia Gourgouris is the president of The Happiness Center, an organization of world-leading experts in the field of Positive Psychology dedicated to creating personal success and happiness. He is also Founding Partner at The Global Institute of Thought Leadership, an organization that brings together bestselling authors, world-renowned speakers, ind...
We're BACK!
October 06, 2021 11:00 - 49 minutes - 44.9 MBEver wonder if there is a story we have not shared or have said we would never share? Well, we wanted to come back strong by sharing a story I (Jessica) said I would never share here on the podcast. It is something I have never even talked to my parents about. 😳 Why have we not shared it? Because I KNOW there will be people who judge me hardcore for this one. Why are we sharing it now? Because I KNOW there is someone who needs to hear it to heal and feel seen. Plus it is part of our story ...
Dating Diaries Part 2 [Replay]
September 15, 2021 11:00 - 54 minutes - 49.9 MBIn this episode, Matt, Steve, and Jessica will dive back into Steve and Jessica’s journal entries from the period when they had patched things up to try and give dating another try. They were each going through a very tough time because things were not working out as they had expected. They go back to June 10, 2012, when Steve was journaling about his spiritual struggles. He believed that he had lost connection with God due to his inability to stop pursuing a gay lifestyle, and he used to ...
Dating Diaries - Part 1 [Replay]
September 01, 2021 11:00 - 56 minutes - 51.5 MBIn this episode, Matt, Steve, and Jessica will take a deeper dive back into the time when Steve and Jessica were getting back together to give things another try, and each of them will pull up their journals and read through their six months of dating post-divorce period. Jessica will start by sharing a journal entry about how she and Steve passed by some of their friends in Colorado as they were heading back to Boise together, and how ballsy that was because she had just a few months befo...
Oklahoma - Part 2 [Replay]
August 18, 2021 11:00 - 38 minutes - 35.3 MBIn this episode, Steve and Jessica will talk about the beginning of the end of their marriage, and how quickly it fell apart. - - - > Learn more at: https://linktr.ee/theboldlogic Additional Resources: Come hang out with us at our first in-person LIVE event. We can't wait to meet you! https://theboldlogic.com/hillive Are you a Stepmom? Is being a Stepmom something that may happen in your near future? I have a FREE ticket just for you to the Stepmom Summit. Claim it here: https://thest...
Oklahoma [Replay]
August 04, 2021 11:00 - 45 minutes - 41.9 MBThis was the time of the most turmoil and stress in Jessica and Steve's marriage. It was the breaking point. Steve had an affair with a man in hopes that it would shut down the gay side of himself, but the reality was quite the opposite. Learn more at: https://linktr.ee/theboldlogic Additional Resources Come hang out with us at our first in-person LIVE event. We can't wait to meet you! https://theboldlogic.com/hillive Are you a Stepmom? Is being a Stepmom something that may happen in...
Break
July 21, 2021 11:00 - 33 minutes - 30.5 MBHey Guys, Jessica, Matt, and Steve here with a big announcement to make. Ever since we recorded our first episode of the Husband in Law podcast, we have really enjoyed the ride. We are grateful that you always tune in each week. Most importantly, we are humbled to know that we have helped many people with our perspective on issues such as coming out, divorce, and co-parenting We are always happy to receive feedback from our listeners that a certain episode helped them navigate something b...
Do It Your Way
July 14, 2021 11:00 - 37 minutes - 34.5 MBLast week, we answered one question from a listener, and this week we answer some more. This week’s set of questions are specifically directed to Steve. Among the questions we answer is one from a listener who wants to know how Steve navigated through coming out and divorce. This listener is in a similar situation, and hopefully, Steve’s perspective makes it easier for them. In addition, we chat about normalizing being gay by being open about it and showing children that gay couples are ...
Pick Your Battles
July 07, 2021 11:00 - 43 minutes - 40.1 MBThis week, Matt, Steve, and I tackle the topic of co-parenting and having the hard conversations that need to be had when raising kids in this situation. The key to successful co-parenting is swallowing your pride and putting aside your ego, and always remember that it is not about either of you; it’s about the wellbeing of the kids. Any anger or resentment you have towards the other parent must not affect the kids in any way. But even with the best of intentions, you and your ex will o...
Want A Date?
June 30, 2021 11:00 - 48 minutes - 44.7 MBLast week Matt, Steve, and I discussed how to talk to kids about gender and sexuality…. This week we build on this by talking about how to approach the topic of dating with kids. 🙌 It is important for kids to learn about healthy relationships before they enter the dating world 💯 Opening up these conversations around sexuality and dating sends a clear message that they can be open with you about what is happening in their life. 👌 Our discussion today is based on a sheet of paper that Matt’...
Talking to Your Kids
June 23, 2021 11:00 - 39 minutes - 36.5 MBJune is Pride Month, and just like we have done with previous episodes this month, we continue to celebrate and support the LGBTQ community. Today, Matt, Steve, and I discuss some ways you can talk with your kids about gender identity sexual orientation. It is important to open up these conversations with your children because the truth is that they are going to hear about these topics. The question is, are they going to hear it from you, or are they going to hear it from other kids in the...
Be An Ally!
June 16, 2021 11:00 - 55 minutes - 50.5 MBHey guys, Jessica here with a new episode. 🙌 And today, Matt, Steve, and I are looking at ways straight, or cisgender people can be good allies to the LGBTQ community. 🏳🌈 If you are wondering, an ally is someone who has privilege but chooses to stand for and with a marginalized community by taking tangible ongoing actions to dismantle systems of oppression. A good ally to the LGBTQ community chooses to love and support people with a different sexual or gender orientation than theirs and...
Show Grace
June 09, 2021 11:00 - 46 minutes - 42.8 MBHi guys, Jessica here! Following on from last week's episode, Matt, Steve, and I continue our conversation about coming out. Steve shares his experience coming out and some of the lessons he learned, and things he could have done differently. One important piece of advice we talk about is why you should manage your expectations of the response you will get from people. The best way to go about this is to give people time and space to process the new information. Remember, this is affecti...
Are You Naked?
June 02, 2021 11:00 - 1 hour - 55.4 MBHey Guys, Jessica here with another exciting episode for you. This week, we start off with an embarrassing co-parenting story that recently happened when I was dropping Penny off at Steve’s house. You’ve got to listen to this one. June is Pride Month, and we thought we could give some advice on how to respond when somebody comes out to you. As Steve always says, somebody very close to you will come out at some point in your life, and how you respond in that instance will shape your relati...
Summertime
May 26, 2021 11:00 - 49 minutes - 45 MBHi everyone, Jessica here 🙌! And today, we're talking about making plans for the summer. Navigating summertime as a blended family can be a little stressful. We’ve had a lot of big moments in our co-parenting situation in the summertime. As we approach summer, we thought we could share our experiences and some of the things that have helped us out in this situation. One of the things we talk about in this episode is approaching summer with the right mindset. Some parents don’t want to mak...
Plate Privileges
May 19, 2021 11:00 - 48 minutes - 44 MBHi guys, Jessica here again with a new episode. This week we talk about what many parents struggle with; how to get kids to do their chores and teaching them why this is important. Getting kids to do chores is often a source of frustration to both the parent and the kid. The parent gets tired of saying it over and over again while the kid doesn't understand the fuss around it. In this episode, we discuss the approach we are using with Penny to get her to do her chores in a way that doesn't...
Mistakes Were Made
May 12, 2021 11:00 - 47 minutes - 43.4 MBHi guys, this is Jessica, and this week, we're back with a new episode! In it, we discuss something a lot of women experience: the realities of being a step-mom. Just like being a mother, being a step-mom can be difficult, scary, and emotionally draining. Navigating those relationships with your spouse's ex and your step-children is never easy, and so, sometimes, mistakes happen. And today, I own up to the mistakes I made as a new step-mom. I believe all mistakes can be lessons, and I hope...
You’re Not My Mom
May 05, 2021 11:00 - 47 minutes - 43.1 MBHi everyone, Jessica here! And today, we're back with a new episode about something that's a pretty big part of our lives. But first, a little catch up: Steve is back from vacation and he is TANNED. He's spent some time on the beach, and he's feeling energized and better than ever now (I must say, I’m a bit jealous)! Now, let’s move on to this week's discussion: how Mother's Day goes in blended families. The beginning was a bit difficult for us. We had to find a way to manage Mother's Day...
Bathtub Confessional
April 28, 2021 11:00 - 40 minutes - 37 MBHi guys, it's Jessica! And today, we're coming back with another episode. Our 100th one as it happens (YAYY)!! And because we've reached such a huge milestone, this week, we're going back to the beginning. But first, since this is our 100th episode (again, YAYY), we have a gift for you guys. I mean, where would we be without you all? We wanted to show our gratitude, so we created a special line of greeting cards for you. They're free, so get them while they're still hot! Now, going back ...
Copoazu
April 21, 2021 11:00 - 43 minutes - 40 MBHey guys, it's Jessica! And today, we're following up on the awkward situation from last week, because the best way to clear things up is to talk about it!! As you can see, good communication is pretty important to us, but last week, some things kind of got lost in translation. If you remember, we discussed some pretty heavy subjects, talked about boundaries, and about my marriage with Matt and our different ways of showing love. This led to a pretty awkward situation where Matt kept thi...
That Didn't Go As Planned!
April 14, 2021 11:00 - 34 minutes - 31.4 MBHi guys, it's Jessica! And in this week's episode, Matt, Steve, and I discuss the importance of setting boundaries! Or at least, we try to... But first, we start with a little catch up! I got my first COVID vaccine (YAY!), we talk about the time Matt had the flu in the beginning of our marriage (fun times), and Steve talks about his Zoom issues (he keeps having Zoom-related incidents and it’s getting out of hand!). Then we go on to discuss this week's subject: Boundaries. Specifically,...
Go and Do Good
April 07, 2021 11:00 - 42 minutes - 39.3 MBHi guys, Jessica here! Following on from last week's episode, Matt, Steve, and I continue our conversation about the church’s stance on LGBTQ people. But first, Matt starts by reading some of the reviews you're leaving us. We love hearing your feedback, it keeps us going, and truly helps us remember why we decided to share our story in the first place. We go on to discuss the responses we got after dropping last week's episode. To be honest, it was all a bit of a doozy! Some comments wer...
Gays in the Church
March 31, 2021 11:00 - 57 minutes - 52.7 MBHi there, it’s Jessica! And this week, Steve, Matt, and I discuss a topic we hold close to our heart: the church’s stance on LGBTQ people. But first, a little update! We start with welcoming Steve, who is back with us now after his COVID mishap, and he is healthier than ever! Hooray to that! We then go on to talk about the most fun subject you can discuss with your friends: funerals! And this is when we find out that Steve wants to be cremated when he dies, because who wants to spend etern...
The Kid Connection
March 24, 2021 11:00 - 50 minutes - 46.4 MBHi there, it’s Jessica! In this week’s episode, Steve, Matt and I discuss our lives with our children, the ups and downs, and what we hope they know! We start with me (yay!) telling a story about Penny’s latest visit to the doctor. Always dreadful for a child, isn’t it? Steve and I also discuss Penny’s slight phone addiction (she’s really into playing Among Us these days) and how we’re trying to minimize her screen time! Matt jumps in on the conversation and we all discuss the many ways we...
Casual Encounters
March 17, 2021 11:00 - 58 minutes - 53.4 MBThis week’s episode starts with Matt talking about his latest trip to Moab, which prompts Steve to discuss his and Jessica’s first trip to Moab, back when they had just gotten married, and tells all about their adventures there. Matt also touches on the change of dynamic with his ex-wife. He discusses their latest court hearing and its effect on their relationship. He goes on to talk about how he had to learn to set up hard boundaries, not only for his own sake, but for the sake of their k...
Space: the Final Frontier
March 10, 2021 12:00 - 44 minutes - 41.2 MBIn this week’s episode, Steve and Jessica discuss how they moved on after the end of their marriage and how different the process was for each of them. They also talk about how they had to take time for themselves to emotionally heal first before they were able to become friends and navigate and nurture their new relationship. They share how their divorce journey was different, and Steve discusses the difficult things he went through after the separation. Finally, Matt expresses how differ...
Creating a Life You Love
March 03, 2021 12:00 - 31 minutes - 28.9 MBThis month is Jessica’s birthday month, and as always, she’s making it worth her while! So get ready, because in this week’s solo episode, you’ll learn all about Jessica’s birthday month traditions, how they started, and why she's not giving up on them any time soon. But that’s not the only thing she discusses in today’s episode! Jessica also shares how she created a life she loved after her divorce, even when she felt like everything was working against her. From teaching you how to s...
Closure
February 24, 2021 12:00 - 38 minutes - 35.7 MBPicking up from last week’s episode, Matt, Steve, and Jessica talk about the end of Steve and Tommy’s relationship. It was one of Steve’s longest relationships and definitely not an easy breakup for him. They talk about the catalyst for the dissolution of that relationship and trying to hold it together for Pride weekend. Steve shares how he felt after it all ended and whether he got any closure at the end. They also touch on Penny’s feelings during it all and how it taught her the lesson o...
Penny's Baptism
February 17, 2021 12:00 - 49 minutes - 45.3 MBThis week, Steve, Matt, and Jessica discuss Penny's baptism and the emotions surrounding this event in her life. Jessica and Steve weren't sure what Penny's involvement in the church would look like. With Steve choosing to leave the church when Penny was a baby, they both agreed to let her decide how active she would be in an effort not to sway her in any direction. When Penny chose to be baptized, she was wholly supported, but it brought some emotions and tensions. Steve was reminded that...
The New Boyfriend
February 10, 2021 12:00 - 41 minutes - 38.1 MBDating after divorce can be tough. In this episode, Matt, Steve, and Jessica talk about Steve’s longest relationship since his marriage. Steve shares how he met Tommy and reveals why their relationship wasn’t the best fit. The pair got along very well, but Steve started to realize that their lifestyles just weren’t compatible. As a single parent, Steve’s schedule is often hectic and filled with activities, and his partnership with Tommy seemed to suffer due to the demands of life. He disc...
You are Good
February 03, 2021 12:00 - 46 minutes - 42.5 MBThis week's episode is a little different. Jessica is on the mic sharing her thoughts on how leaders can inadvertently lead us to feel shame. Recently, Jessica was working on a weekly bible study and was taken aback by the lesson's message. Instead of uplifting her, it had the opposite effect and reinforced some of the negative ideals we put on women. In so many ways, women are fighting an uphill battle when it comes to issues of equality. Today, Jessica discusses her perspective on some ...
Case Closed
January 27, 2021 12:00 - 37 minutes - 34.1 MBFirst, they talk about the impact the reviews have on their lives. They are thankful for the feedback and support of the show. Jessica spends some time reflecting on moments with Penny, and why it’s important to soak in the everyday moments, we spend with our families. Matt shares what unfolded after the court situation and talks about the new custody arrangement with the kids. They all talk about how they’ve coped with that timeline events and where they are now in their relationship with ...
Ball Drop
January 20, 2021 12:00 - 41 minutes - 37.7 MBMatt, Jessica, and Steve discuss how they make it through the rough times and offer some tips that may help you! But first, they spend some time talking about going “viral” on Instagram, reminisce on some of their “first time” experiences, and finally recap this most recent holiday season. If you’ve been listening to the past few episodes, then you know they’ve been covering Matt’s custody issues with his kids. Those experiences have caused an immense amount of stress and have certainly be...
This Podcast is S**T
January 13, 2021 12:00 - 46 minutes - 42.6 MBThis week, we welcome back Steve to the podcast. He was out last week on a trip to Arizona. He shares his new year’s intentions and discusses his training schedule for his upcoming ultra marathon. Matt and Jessica describe what led to Matt’s kids getting a psychiatric evaluation. They talk about what life was like during this time. They tell the stress it put on the entire family and how Matt dealt with his parenting being scrutinized. At the end of the day, the best we can do is stick t...
Golden Nugget
January 06, 2021 12:00 - 29 minutes - 27 MBHappy new year, everyone! We are so thankful to start off 2021 with you all and looking forward to the great things to come. This week, Matt and Jessica discuss goals vs. intentions and how to be successful in setting goals. Many of us start the year with our hopes for what we want to change and accomplish. Matt and Jessica share their goals for the upcoming twelve months and the energy they’ll be bringing into it. They also cover the differences between goals and intentions and how to im...
Bold Boundaries
December 30, 2020 12:00 - 51 minutes - 47.2 MBThis week, Jessica shares her live lesson on creating Bold Boundaries in your life and relationships. Maybe you feel like you've lost a part of who you are or are looking to create change in your life but not sure where to start. Or you've been struggling to show up to your life or relationships in a way that feels authentic to who you are. You let other people's opinions determine how you act or what you do, and you want to create more joy in your life. If you are feeling any of those th...
Shop With a Cop
December 23, 2020 12:00 - 38 minutes - 35.7 MBThis week, Matt, Steve, and Jessica keep things light and answer some questions you guys may have had from previous episodes. They share what it’s like to put personal details about their life out in the open and revisit the conversation from last week. Matt describes Jack’s perspective on his custody issues with Ann. Jessica tells the parameters they’ve implemented in their interactions with Ann and how she and Matt struggled during this time in their relationship. Jessica needed Matt to k...
Cold Lunch
December 16, 2020 12:00 - 44 minutes - 40.9 MBThis week, Steve, Jessica, and Matt discuss more of the issues they faced navigating Ann's custody arrangement. It seems the constant lesson to be learned through this season of Matt and Jessica's life is boundary setting. In this episode, Matt and Jessica are back into a routine with the kids but continually deal with the stress of having Ann's frequent interference. Jessica is accused of withholding food from the kids, leaving her hurt and frustrated. She struggles with determining wher...
Kid Exchange Take Two
December 09, 2020 12:00 - 45 minutes - 42.1 MBThis week, Matt, Jessica, and Steve pick up where they left off last week on their story about Ann’s restraining order against Matt. During the whole custody fiasco, Matt got a knock on the door from the police. Ann had accused Matt of domestic violence and requested to have a restraining order put on him. This resulted in an incredibly tumultuous several weeks for the entire family as they went back and forth, trying to handle the situation best. Tune into this week’s episode to hear how ...
The Kid Exchange
December 02, 2020 12:00 - 51 minutes - 47 MBJessica, Matt, and Steve are back from their break to talk about that cliffhanger they left you on! If you’ve been following along with their timeline, then you know tensions are high between Matt’s ex-wife Ann and him. Today, they’re discussing the incident that ended with the cops intervening and Matt ending the day with charges pressed against him. Tune in as they tell the whole story, what Matt had to do to protect his family, pursue his own healing, and learn from the whole situation!...
Surprise!
November 25, 2020 12:00 - 6 minutes - 6.33 MBWe’ll be back for a regular episode next week but in the meantime, we wanted to pop in and give you an exclusive opportunity to join us in one of our favorite holiday traditions! Jessica is making “little dudes” for the shop this year. They are gnomes that we have been gifting throughout our family for the last decade and we thought it would be a great idea to bring you in on the fun! Listen to this short episode for the story behind our little gnomes and details for ordering one for your...
Time for a Little Break
November 18, 2020 12:00 - 11 minutes - 11 MBLife has been pretty stressful and hectic recently, so Matt, Steve, and Jessica decided to do some boundary setting and take a break for the next two weeks. Matt’s business keeps him and Steve very busy, and Jessica has been in quarantine as she recovers from COVID. They thought it’d be best to take a little break and reenergize themselves so they can bring their best selves back on December 2nd for the next episode. In the meantime, tune in for details on Jessica’s upcoming lessons and ...
Life Isn't Fair
November 11, 2020 11:00 - 44 minutes - 41 MBMatt and Jessica thought that buying a home would be an opportunity for a fresh and positive start. What ended up happening was Ann coming after Matt for more child support because in her mind it wasn’t fair that he was able to take that next step. This led Matt and Jessica needing to get really clear on their boundaries as they navigated the storm to come. They struggled to agree on custody terms as well as what school the kids should go to. Because of the custody arrangement, the kids had...
Matt's A Diva
November 04, 2020 12:00 - 40 minutes - 37.1 MBDon’t give your time to people who make you cry on the playground. This week we are tackling the importance of setting boundaries! Steve talks about quitting his job and his new career working with Matt’s company, Ship Zoom. They all muse on this new and exciting dynamic, and Matt explains his initial hesitation with bringing Steve on the team. Jessica talks about her upcoming training on setting boundaries. She tells a story when a close friend confronted her to tell her she should leave ...
Moving Out Moving On
October 28, 2020 11:00 - 44 minutes - 40.8 MBThis week, Matt, Steve, and Jessica discuss some of the trials that can come up with co-parenting. Matt and Jessica share their experience helping Ann move out and get an apartment for herself and the kids. They describe their hopes that showing support would help strengthen their relationship with her. And for a while, it did until miscommunication got in the way and disrupted the progress they were making. Jessica explains the catalyst of that divide, and the three of them talk about tr...
He's back...
October 21, 2020 11:00 - 44 minutes - 40.5 MBIn this episode, Steve, Matt, and Jessica talk about how Steve and Sebastien decided to get back together and give their relationship another try. Steve could never quite get over Sebastien after they first broke up. He struggled to date anyone else for three years as his heart still very much belonged to him. The second time around, it became incredibly clear that they just weren’t the right match. Steve reveals some of the issues in the relationship and the growth he endured during that ...
Jess and Ann
October 14, 2020 11:00 - 40 minutes - 37.3 MBThis week, Matt, Steve, and Jessica go over the timeline of Jessica and Ann’s relationship. The beginning of their relationship was pretty promising, and they got along quite well. Jessica discusses what she did to keep the relationship positive and as happy as possible. She explains what it was like to let her guard down around Ann and their growing relationship. They also cover the moment the relationship began to dissolve and what the aftermath of that has been like. The three offer an ...
Red Feather
October 07, 2020 11:00 - 47 minutes - 43.4 MBThis week, Matt, Steve, and Jessica discuss Matt and Jessica buying a home together, and Matt and Jessica’s dinner with Jack and Ann. Buying a home was a pivotal moment in Jessica and Matt’s relationship. They struggled a lot during the early years of their marriage and questioned whether they would even stay together. The home signaled a unifying moment between them that they were hopeful of sticking together and acted as a commitment to working together. One of the issues they tackled...
Disciplinary Council
September 30, 2020 11:00 - 47 minutes - 43.4 MBYou might remember Jessica, Matt, and Steve discussing this in previous episodes. It's the meeting Steve had with the bishopric council to decide how he moved forward in his relationship with the church and Jessica. At this point, he still had hope that they could be together as he was unwilling to accept himself fully. A disciplinary council meeting is conducted when a church member has sinned in a way that the church feels they need to be sat in front of a council of priesthood holders. ...