Think Act Be Podcast

Ep. 126: Bunmi Laditan — Discovering Divine Love That Transcends Our Trauma and Pain

My guest this week is Bunmi Laditan, author of a new book called Dear God: Honest Prayers to a God Who Listens. I really loved talking with Bunmi. She has a sincerity and an authenticity that are impossible to miss. We explored her moments of darkness and doubt, the difficulty we might have in relating to the concept of “God” as a male figure, whether God appreciates our irreverence, and the nature of divine love, among other topics. I don’t think Bunmi would mind my saying that she has a ...

Ep. 125: Dr. Michael J. Stephen — How to Connect with the Extraordinary Power of Your Lungs

My guest this week is Dr. Michael Stephen. He’s the author of a new book called Breath Taking: The Power, Fragility, and Future of Our Extraordinary Lungs (affiliate link). Michael and I talked about some really important ideas related to the lungs, including life itself, of course, and COVID, mind-body breathwork, the communal nature of our atmosphere, the extraordinary human feats our lungs make possible, and a lot more.

Ep. 124: Dr. Ted Brodkin & Ashley Pallathra — How to Strengthen Our Relationships Through Better Attunement

My guests this week are Dr. Ted Brodkin and Ashley Pallathra, authors of the recent book Missing Each Other (affiliate link), which is about finding social attunement. I really enjoyed this discussion, where we explored the benefits of greater connection during our interactions with others, and how we can cultivate that connection.

Ep. 123: Malachi Gillihan — How to Let Life Live Through You After Trauma

My guest this week is my brother, Malachi Gillihan. He’s currently doing graduate work in east-west psychology, studying the intersection of trauma and spirituality. So we talked a lot about that connection (which builds on my conversation with Jonah Paquette in last week’s episode). We also got into issues like Steve Porges’s polyvagal theory, the harsh self-judgments we often make after trauma, and what it means to say yes to all of life. It hope you find our discussion to be helpful.

Ep. 122: Dr. Jonah Paquette — Why Not Make Room for All of Your Experience?

I’m very pleased this week to have Dr. Jonah Paquette back on the podcast for a second time. Jonah is the author of an excellent book called Awestruck (affiliate link), which we talked a lot about in our first conversation. This time we focused on a couple of main topics. The first was trauma, and especially posttraumatic growth. We explored the question of whether there is any contradiction between the pain and confusion of trauma, and the possibility that we can grow from our most difficul...

Ep. 121: Tim Payton & Douglass Teschner— How to Have Better Political Discussions

I have two important and enjoyable conversations to share with you this week. Both are about finding greater unity and harmony in our political conversations, even when we hold very different views. Tim Payton and Douglass Teschner are both to the right of me on the political spectrum, but we share a lot of similar values, and a deep concern about the corrosive division in our country. I really appreciate the perspective that each of my guests brings. The biggest overarching theme in this ...

Ep. 120: Dr. Joel Minden — The Best Tools for Managing Anxiety & Depression

My guest this week is Dr. Joel Minden, who’s been on the podcast twice before (check out episode 21 and epidose 87). I always enjoy talking with Joel, who has such a wealth of knowledge about treating anxiety and depression. We thought together again about the most effective way to approach these conditions, especially the question of how much we try to change our emotions versus making peace with them, and focusing on doing what’s important to us. As always, Joel does a really nice job at...

Ep. 119: Dr. Jason Ong — The Most Important Principles for Good Sleep

My guest this week is Dr. Jason Ong, who specializes in the treatment of sleep disorders. I’ve wanted to have Jason on the podcast for a while now because he’s done some really pioneering work in applying mindfulness to the treatment of insomnia. If you struggle with getting sound sleep sometimes, which so many of us do, Jason has a lot to say about the most effective ways to get better sleep.

Ep. 118: Dr. Mitch Greene — Managing Loss & Upheaval in the Time of COVID

My guest this week is my friend and fellow psychologist Dr. Mitch Greene, who was on the podcast way back on episode 28. I love talking with Mitch, and this conversation was no exception. We focused on the mental health challenges we’re facing related to COVID and the shutdowns, including for the many athletes that Mitch works with in his sport psychology practice. I’m guessing you’ll find a lot you can relate to in this discussion.

Ep. 117: Mark Gregory Karris — Rewriting Destructive Beliefs About God & Faith

My guest this week is Mark Gregory Karris. We discussed his recent book, Religious Refugees, which describes the process so many of us will go through of losing our faith, and needing to reconstruct it in a new way. Mark is intimately familiar with this process having gone through it himself, and he guides other religious refugees as they wrestle with issues of faith. Mark and I had a lot of overlap in our backgrounds, having left fundamentalist Christian denominations, and also a shared h...

Ep. 116: What Does Love Look Like When Our Politics Clash?

I have a different kind of discussion for you this week. My guests are my brother, Timothy Gillihan, and my mom, Carolyn Gillihan. I invited them on to talk about their political differences, which came up recently in the aftermath of the 2020 presidential election. I want to do what I can to promote civil dialogue, and this conversation is one step in that direction. For full disclosure in where I stand, I’m registered as an Independent and I voted for Joe Biden and Kamala Harris, though I’...

Ep. 115: Blake D. Bauer — How to Be Kinder to Yourself

My guest this week is Blake D. Bauer, author of the bestselling book, You Were Not Born to Suffer. I was really struck as I read this book by how similar many of Blake’s ideas are to the way that I see human nature. His main focus is on loving ourselves deeply, and what that means in practical terms. We also explored how denying our needs can lead to physical and emotional distress, and why we need to give ourselves permission to be well and happy. I hope you take a lot from our discussion.

Ep. 114: Jared Byas — Why Love Is More Important Than Being Right

My guest this week is Jared Byas, author of the new book, Love Matters More: How Fighting to Be Right Keeps Us From Loving Like Jesus. This was a great conversation, as Jared and I found a many points of connection. The book focuses on matters of faith, but the principles apply to anything we can have strong beliefs and opinions about, including of course, politics. We talked specifically about how we might emphasize love in our discussions with those who hold different political beliefs, an...

Ep. 113: Dr. Scott Kellogg — A Powerful Technique for Healing, Love, and Growth

My guest this week is Dr. Scott Kellogg, a therapist in private practice in New York. He’s the author of a book called Transformational Chairwork, and we focused on what chairwork is and why it can be so powerful. It was a great discussion about how we’re all made of different parts, and we can give voice to all of these facets of ourselves in a way that promotes integration and growth. One thing I hadn’t expected in this discussion was the demonstration I did with Scott, where he led me thr...

Ep. 112: Dr. Steve Taylor — How to Find Spiritual Connection in Everything You Do

Ep. 111: Anita Friday — How to Promote Racial Healing Through Love and Empathy

My guest this week is Anita Friday, creator of an organization called Open Hearts: A Path for Racial Healing. Anita and I talked about her experiences as a Black woman and mother, and the things that those of us who are White can take for granted. We also explored the distinction between racism and related concepts, how to make a difference right where we live, and the love and faith that motivate Anita’s work. I also wanted to let you know that you’ll hear the N-word in this episode. It’s a...

Ep. 110: Dr. Peter Enns — What If God Actually Likes You?

I’ve got a very special guest for you this week. Professor Peter Enns, author of books that include The Sin of Certainty and How the Bible Actually Works (affiliate links), joins me for a discussion about the Bible, Christianity, love, trust, and the evolving nature of faith. I grew up with a very fundamentalist understanding of the Bible, and can relate to so many of the things that Pete writes and talks about, including the fear of getting our facts wrong and offending God. As Pete point...

Ep. 109: Alison McKleroy — How to Overcome Social Anxiety

My guest this week is Alison McKleroy, a psychotherapist who just wrote a book called Essential Strategies for Social Anxiety: Practical Techniques to Face Your Fears, Overcome Self-Doubt, and Thrive (affiliate link). This is episode 109 and I believe my first focusing specifically on social anxiety, so this is long overdue. Alison had a lot to share about the essentials of evidence-based cognitive behavioral therapy for social anxiety, including many of the big ideas from her book. Toward...

Ep. 108: Dr. Steven C. Hayes — You Want to Feel All of It

My guest this week is none other than the creator of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (or ACT), Dr. Steve Hayes. I was excited for the opportunity to talk with Steve, and he certainly did not disappoint. We got into some really fascinating territory together, starting with the crucial importance of psychological flexibility. From there we ranged into comparisons of ACT and traditional cognitive behavioral therapy, and some of the potential pitfalls of a cognitive approach. Many of the i...

Ep. 107: Dr. Benjamin Hardy — How to Craft Your Best Future Self

My guest this week is psychologist Dr. Benjamin Hardy. Ben recently wrote an excellent book called Personality Isn’t Permanent: Break Free From Self-Limiting Beliefs and Rewrite Your Story. This conversation is all about overcoming self-imposed limitations so your past doesn’t have to define your future. I find Ben’s message very uplifting, with his focus on the choice that each of us has in determining our path and our identity, and the freedom we can find as we decide who our future self w...

Ep. 106: Dr. Paul Greene — The Fundamentals of Effective Treatment for Trauma & Anxiety

My guest this week is fellow clinical psychologist and CBT therapist Dr. Paul Greene. We talked about our experiences with mindfulness, both in our own lives and in our clinical practice. We also explored the effectiveness of CBT for treating trauma and posttraumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and our thoughts on combining these treatment programs with some of the body-focused treatments (like those I discussed in a recent episode with Ilene Smith). Paul and I also got into some of the personal...

Ep. 105: Dr. Jonah Paquette — How to Find Awe in Everyday Experiences

Ep. 105: Dr. Jonah Paquette — How to Find Awe in Your Everyday Experiences

My guest this week is psychologist Dr. Jonah Paquette. We focused on his new book, Awestruck: How Embracing Wonder Can Make You Happier, Healthier, and More Connected. Jonah and I explored what awe is and what causes it, and how we can cultivate more experiences of awe in our everyday lives, even in situations that seem anything but awe-inspiring. These experiences have everything to do with attention, and with waking up to what it means to have what we call an “ordinary life.”

Ep. 104: Dr. Joseph Luciani — How to Unlearn Anxiety, Depression, and Worry

Ep. 104: Dr. Joseph Luciani — How to Unlearn Anxiety, Depression, & Stress

My guest this week is Dr. Joseph Luciani, author of a book called Unlearning Anxiety & Depression: The 4-Step Self-Coaching Program to Reclaim Your Life. Joe and I explored some of his background in more depth-oriented psychology, especially a Jungian approach where we explore symbols and dreams and archetypes, and his transition to a more action-oriented style. We got into some pretty interesting territory, especially about the spiritual implications of psychotherapy. As Joe said, if we t...

Ep. 103: Dr. Mark Weisberg — How Hypnosis Can Help Relieve Stress, Anxiety, & Pain

Ep. 103: Dr. Mark Weisberg — How Hypnosis Can Help Relieve Stress, Anxiety, and Pain

My guest this week is clinical health psychologist Dr. Mark Weisberg. We talked about his specialty in clinical hypnosis, and how it can make treatment more effective. I’m sure you’ve heard of hypnosis, but the way Mark uses it might be different from the images that come to mind when we hear the word. We talked about using it to help treat stress, anxiety, irritable bowel syndrome, and other conditions. 

Ep. 102: Devon & Craig Hase — How to Energize Every Moment with Buddhist Principles

My guests this week are Devon Hase and Craig Hase, authors of the new book, How Not to Be a Hot Mess. These two have a way of making the principles of mindfulness and Buddhism relevant and easy to understand. As you’ll hear, we discussed many points of intersection in how they and I think about mindfulness, and the need for additional practices besides simply being present and open. We talked a lot about “waking up from the dream” to more fully inhabit our lives, what Buddhism has to say a...

Ep. 101: Ilene Smith — How to Heal from Trauma by Being in the Body

My guest this week is Ilene Smith, author of the recent book, Moving Beyond Trauma: The Roadmap to Healing from Your Past and Living with Ease and Vitality (affiliate link). If you’ve been through a trauma—and most of us have—then this is a conversation for you. Ilene shared her expertise on how we can use the body to help us heal from traumatic events. If you’ve read anything by Peter Levine or maybe Bessel van der Kolk’s book The Body Keeps the Score (affiliate link), you’ll recognize a lo...

Ep. 100: Bridgit Dengel Gaspard — How to Fulfill Your Biggest Goals

My guest this week is Bridgit Dengel Gaspard, therapist and author of the forthcoming book, The Final Eighth (affiliate link). We discussed something that I’m guessing all of us can relate to at some point in our lives: Why is it that we often make a lot of progress toward our goals, and then we stall out in the home stretch? Maybe it's buying a house, starting a business, starting a family, writing that book—whatever it is, we might even get seven-eighths of the way there. And then we hit...

Ep. 99: Dr. Michael Lovell — Serving the Greater Good Through Trauma-Informed Care

My guest this week is Dr. Michael Lovell, president of Marquette University. Michael is deeply committed to trauma-informed care in the city of Milwaukee (where Marquette is located), and to addressing the persistent racial disparities in our society. He’s been outspoken about his own history of childhood trauma, and is using the pain of his past in his efforts to serve others. That’s something I see so often in my clinical work—that our own struggles can be transformed into a way to help ...

Ep. 98: Sarah McCafferty — How to Overcome Fear with Love to Talk About Race

My guest this week is Sarah McCafferty. As you’ll hear, Sarah is passionate about issues of justice and equality. We focused on issues of race, in light of the developments in our society in recent weeks. I don’t know about you but I was really reluctant to talk about race, because I was afraid I would say the wrong things, as I mentioned on a recent episode. Sarah has some really helpful things to say about moving through that fear, and why joining the conversation is so important—and no ...

Ep. 97: Worthy Stokes — How to Embrace the Healing Power of Human Presence

My guest this week is Worthy Stokes, author of The Daily Meditation Book of Healing: 365 Reflections for Positivity, Peace, and Prosperity. I got so much out of this discussion with Worthy. She had a near-death experience a few years ago that opened her eyes to the full reality of who she is. A lot of what I love about her perspective is that she fully values all parts of our experience—our bodies, our minds, our spirits, our souls—the full range of what it means to be a human. We talked abo...

Ep. 96: Ashley James — How to Effectively Lower Stress and Manage Anxiety

My guest this week is Ashley James. We had planned to focus on anxiety in this episode, which we did spend a good bit of time talking about. But we also talked a lot about general health and nutrition, and the important role of diet in our physical and mental health. This is a topic that’s gotten a lot more attention in recent years. For some reason it was quite controversial for a long time to suggest that what we put in our mouths could affect our minds and spirits, and could contribute ...

Ep. 95: Robert Dilenschneider — How to Take Responsibility for Your Most Important Decisions

My guest this week is Robert Dilenschneider, author of the recent book Decisions: Practical Advice from 23 Men and Women Who Changed the World (affiliate link). Bob had some really important things to say about this moment we find ourselves in, with the many problems we’re facing. A global pandemic, economic turmoil, and now the pain and upheaval following the deaths of George Floyd and other Black men and women in the US at the hands of the police. These events have compelled all of us to...

Ep. 94: Nick Davies — How to Create a Life You Love One Step at a Time

My guest this week is business and career coach Nick Davies. As you’ll hear, Nick is from England, though he’s currently living in the States. I really enjoyed talking with Nick, not only because he’s easy to listen to, but because he speaks very clearly about principles that we find in cognitive behavioral therapy. He and I talked about things like how to develop better habits, learning to recognize the stories we tell ourselves, and the importance of a compelling Why for our goals. I’m s...

Ep. 93: Dr. Adam Meadows — A Prescription for Finding Faith, Trust, and Love

My guest this week is psychiatrist Dr. Adam Meadows, author of the recent book, A Prescription for Living with Purpose: Maintaining Hope, Healing, & Connection as You Create the Life You Were Destined to Live (affiliate link). It was great to catch up with Adam and hear his passion for changing lives, including his own. I’ve known Adam for about 10 years, and I've enjoyed seeing the direction he’s pursued since leaving Penn, where we met. In this episode we talked about faith, trust, the i...

Ep. 92: Kevin Hancock — How to Own, Love, and Share Your Unique Voice

My guest this week is Kevin Hancock, author of the recent book, The Seventh Power: One CEO’s Journey into the Business of Shared Leadership (affiliate link). I loved this conversation with Kevin. There were so many profound points that emerged as we explored what it means to find our voice, and to be heard. This topic is close to my heart for several reasons, including my own history of vocal difficulties and throat surgery. As you’ll hear, Kevin has dealt with a rare neurological conditio...

Ep. 91: Lorraine Ladish — Overcoming Challenges to Create a Life You Love

My guest this week is author and content creator Lorraine Ladish. We talked about the value of mind-body work, Lorraine’s favorite self-care activities, the importance of daily practices in caring for our minds and bodies, and spirituality as letting go of the illusion of control, among other topics. Lorraine has been through a lot in her lifetime, and she describes where she has found strength and grace along the way.

Ep. 90: Darren Gold — How to Rewrite Your Unconscious Programming

My guest this week is Darren Gold, author of the new book Master Your Code: The Art, Wisdom, and Science of Leading an Extraordinary Life (affiliate link). Darren offers many powerful ideas that I know you’re going to find useful, like how to set yourself up for success, and learning how to rewrite your unconscious programs. As you’ll hear, Darren really speaks my language, because the things he’s describing are in line with solid cognitive and behavioral principles. There’s a lot here tha...

Ep. 89: Caroline Wright — Finding Love and Joy No Matter What

My guest this week is cook and author Caroline Wright. At the age of 32, Caroline was diagnosed with a brain tumor and given one year to live. Three years later she’s beaten the odds, and is full of enthusiasm and hope and vitality. We discussed her very moving children’s book Lasting Love (affiliate link), which is a love letter to her children and also to any family dealing with the loss of a loved one. To be honest, this was not the conversation I was expecting. I thought we’d talk a lo...

Ep. 88: Dr. Christopher Kerr — Finding Hope and Comfort at the End of Life

My guest this week is Dr. Christopher Kerr. Chris is a hospice physician and author of the recent book, Death Is But a Dream: Finding Hope and Meaning at Life's End (affiliate link). This was an important topic, but I hadn’t realized the implications for the current situation we find ourselves in with the coronavirus pandemic. One of the things that’s so many of us are deeply troubled by is that people are dying now without being able to have their loved ones by their side. Chris and I tal...

Ep. 87: Dr. Joel Minden — How to Move Through Anxiety and Live Your Best Life

My guest this week is Dr. Joel Minden, a psychologist who specializes in the treatment of anxiety. We focused on the ideas from his excellent new book, Show Your Anxiety Who's Boss (affiliate link). Joel's emphasis is on finding effective long-term strategies that can change our relationship with anxiety in a big way, rather than on trying to find tricks to use in the moment to just get through spells of high anxiety. He stresses the importance of letting our values decide what’s important a...

Ep. 86: Dr. David Richo — How Triggers Can Free You From Anxiety and Pain

My guest this week in Dr. David Richo, who was on the podcast before back in 2018 when we talked about mindfulness in relationships. This time we were focusing on his new book, Triggers: How to Stop Reacting and Start Healing (affiliate link). It’s a great guide for how to use your emotional reactions when you’re triggered as the starting point for identifying and resolving the underlying issues. One of the things I love most about Dave’s approach is how he doesn’t pretend there’s some tri...

Ep. 85: Dr. Robert Leeman — How to Develop a Healthier Relationship With Alcohol

My guest this week is Dr. Rob Leeman, who specializes in research on alcohol use among adults. Rob has been a good friend of mine for the past two decades, since we met in graduate school in 2001. He’s a real expert on alcohol and addiction, and he shared from his wealth of knowledge in this discussion. There are a lot of important takeaways here—things like the effects of alcohol on anxiety and sleep, the relation between trauma and alcohol use, effective treatments for reducing alcohol con...

Ep. 84: Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman — How to Transcend Fear, Anxiety, and Uncertainty

My guest this week is psychologist Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman, author of the brand new book, Transcend: The New Science of Self-Actualization (affiliate link). We spent a good bit of time thinking together about how the ideas from his terrific book apply to ongoing coronavirus crisis and the social distancing that’s affecting our lives in so many ways. (One effect is that our family members are home all the time, so you may hear some kid sounds during the episode.) Scott and I also talked abo...

Fourteen Breaths: Grounding Meditation for Anxiety, Stress, and Worry

What a time this is for all of us. My thoughts and prayers are with those with COVID-19 and the courageous loved ones and medical staff taking care of them. In these anxious times we need ways to come back to center, as the stress and uncertainty can lead to being wound up, scattered, out of our bodies and stuck in our minds. So this week I have a simple centering practice for you, called Fourteen Breaths. This meditation actually comes from a new course I've created called Balance: Mindful...

Fourteen Breaths: Grounding Meditation for Anxiety, Stress, & Worry

In these anxious times we need ways to come back to center, as stress and uncertainty can lead to being wound up, scattered, out of our bodies and stuck in our minds. So this week I have a simple centering practice for you, called Fourteen Breaths. This meditation actually comes from a new course I've created called Balance: Mindfulness-Centered Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Anxiety, Stress, & Worry. This is a paid 4-week course with one lesson per week, but it's available to all regard...

Ep. 83: Linda Carroll — How to Build a More Loving Relationship

My guest this week is Linda Carroll, author of the recent book, Love Skills: The Keys to Unlocking Lasting, Wholehearted Love (affiliate link). This is an important conversation for any time, and it may be especially important now as so many of us are social distancing on the one hand but are also with our partners 24/7. This can be great, and also presents challenges, and opportunities to work together toward a stronger union. Linda and I discussed things like how our adult relationships ...

Ep. 82: Drs. Paul Napper & Anthony Rao — How to Reclaim a Life on Your Terms

I have two guests this week—psychologists Dr. Paul Napper and Dr. Anthony Rao. We discussed their recent book, The Power of Agency: The 7 Principles to Conquer Obstacles, Make Effective Decisions, and Create a Life on Your Own Terms (affiliate link). Agency’s an important topic that we probably don’t talk about enough. The three of us explored ways to reclaim greater control over our lives, from engaging more with the physical world to releasing fear and honoring our intuition. We also discu...