Save Your Sanity - Help for Toxic Relationships
475 episodes - English - Latest episode: about 2 months ago - ★★★★★ - 44 ratingsThe Save Your Sanity podcast offers episodes filled with the expert insights, validation, strategies, and support you need to recognize, manage, and recover from relationships with the relentlessly difficult, toxic--and often disturbing--people that host Dr. Rhoberta Shaler calls Hijackals®.
She offers invaluable help to stop the second-guessing, undermining, and crazy-making traits, patterns, and cycles you have encountered in relationships with folks like those. Understand the ways, whys, and hows that verbal abuse, emotional abuse, and spiritual abuse affect you over time. Whether the Hijackal is a partner, parent, ex, or colleague, what you will learn here will strengthen and empower you to step up, speak up, and stand up for yourself in healthy, assertive ways.
Many Hijackals have behaviors that are considered the same as those who are diagnosed as narcissists, borderlines, psychopaths, sociopaths, and histrionic personality disorder. These insights will help you to make the changes--and good decisions--to move from pain to power, and that's exactly what you want to do! Listen now.
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Episodes
What a Formerly Toxic CEO Learned That Transformed All His Relationships
April 29, 2021 17:26 - 49 minutes - 39.9 MBHave you experienced a toxic boss? Were you one? Today's guest, Krister Ungerbock, admits to, at one time, being an aggressive boss. Maybe, even, a toxic one. He changed. Learn why and how it became important to him to shift, and how that lead to his writing 22 TALK SHIFTS: TOOLS TO TRANSFORM LEADERSHIP When you have a toxic parent, you may pick up toxic behaviors. That can ruin your personal relationships, for sure. However, that can also have a huge, negative impact on how you lead in bus...
RECOGNIZING REACTIVE ABUSE
April 27, 2021 03:38 - 34 minutes - 27.9 MBDo you ever wonder if you're the problem in a relationship when you know that the other person is forever pushing your buttons, blaming and shaming you? You may be suffering from "Reactive Abuse," and that's a cycle that you can put a stop to. You are patient. You give the benefit of the doubt. You take the blame. You apologize when you have done nothing wrong. Any of those sound familiar? Do you do them too often? Do you find yourself on the apologizing, even begging, end of abuse? Well,...
PASTCASTING™? What it is
April 20, 2021 06:14 - 35 minutes - 28.2 MBWonder why you don't seem to create the momentum to address your toxic relationship? PastCasting™ is one way. It's my term for a well-established internal program that immediately causes you to stay stuck, even when you know you're settling and unhappy. Or, why you are fearful and exhausted. It's so much easier to think of the past than face the present when you're in a toxic relationship. Distant memories can be made to seem like truth when your mind doesn't want to deal with reality in th...
10 Childhood Traumas You Need to Recognize & Recover From
April 15, 2021 23:46 - 1 hour - 48.8 MBEver wonder why you give difficult or toxic people too many chances? Ever wonder why you make a plan to leave, execute it, and end up going back? It happens, and it has a reason...or twelve! Childhood trauma often is recognized when it was obvious. Much of childhood trauma can be subtle and somewhat under the radar, too. You can heal that, too, and it can make a huge difference to your satisfaction and joy in relationships. Riana Milne has a great definition of a toxic partner: "anyone w...
Wonder Why People-Pleasers Attract Emotional Abusers?
April 13, 2021 03:51 - 45 minutes - 36.5 MBGrowing up in an emotionally abusive home, or an overly compassionate home, or even and emotionally neglectful home can set you up to accept emotional abuse. It's not your fault! Maybe, you had a perfectly lovely home, but you were encouraged to put other people's needs, wants, expectations, and desires ahead of your own. That can happen, and you being so giving gets sadly and badly taken advantage of by a #Hijackal. People pleasers make great targets--and easy pickings--for a Hijackal, a...
Feeling Stuck & Second-Guessing Yourself?
April 06, 2021 05:18 - 32 minutes - 26.2 MBYes, you are wise to be self-reflective, asking yourself "What is my part in the relationship difficulties?" #Hijackals and other toxic people want you to taking responsibility for the whole relationship. They are happy to tell you that everything is your fault. You know that. In this episode, I'm addressing the three BIG questions I am asked so frequently when someone gets to the point of considering leaving, or has recently left a toxic relationship. These three questions cause them to fu...
MEN: How to Revive a Dormant Sex Life After You've Killed the Connection
April 03, 2021 20:29 - 49 minutes - 39.4 MBMen, would you like to know what to say when your female partner is really angry? The answer--and many more--are in this episode with GS Youngblood, author of The Masculine in Relationship. He says, "There are so many couples in pain in the world. The man feeling that his partner criticizes and belittles him, and is not interested in sex. The woman dying for more emotional connection, and to feel much more power, leadership, and clarity from her man." Oh, yes, you can bet I was champing a...
Future Faking
March 30, 2021 05:35 - 28 minutes - 23.1 MBAll those promises! All those dreams! Was it future faking? That's a very common way that #Hijackals keep you engaged in the relationship. Learn how it works...and, what really doesn't work about it. You need to see this clearly, or you'll be hooked on hope! All you ever wanted and more...one day. That's the promise of future faking: when a Hijackal promises or alludes to giving you something you want in the future to get what they want in the present. And, so much more. A Hijackal makes b...
Future Faking
March 30, 2021 05:35 - 28 minutes - 23.1 MBAll those promises! All those dreams! Was it future faking? That's a very common way that #Hijackals keep you engaged in the relationship. Learn how it works...and, what really doesn't work about it. You need to see this clearly, or you'll be hooked on hope! All you ever wanted and more...one day. That's the promise of future faking: when a Hijackal promises or alludes to giving you something you want in the future to get what they want in the present. And, so much more. A Hijackal makes b...
Renowned Thoracic Surgeon Shares How Doctors Can Increase Empathy & Compassion
March 25, 2021 20:54 - 53 minutes - 43.2 MBWhy is this episode important on a show about toxic relationships? Because your doctor--and other healers--need to be empathetic, aware, interested, listening, and compassionate. Some are wonderful. Others, not so much. You need to find one that cares about all of you, not just the numbers, graphs, and medications. In your toxic relationship, have you ever been seriously ill or injured? What kind of care did you get at home? That's a big moment, isn't it, when you realize that the toxic per...
7 Unhealthy Patterns You Learn Growing Up in a Narcissistic Family
March 23, 2021 04:32 - 43 minutes - 34.5 MBYou may not even know you picked up all this from narcissistic family dynamics in your life. When you hear these things, you may find the key to unlocking relationship difficulties you've had in your adult life. Definitely worth listening to! We take SO much in as young children, even before we have any language skills at all! We come to know if we're wanted, loved, appreciated, welcomed, and heard before we ever understand a word anyone says to us. That impacts our whole life...unless we r...
GASLIGHTING: Sneaky Emotional Abuse
March 16, 2021 05:34 - 36 minutes - 29.6 MBUnderstanding the many faces of gaslighting helps you see it coming. Then, seeing it for what it is, you can discount it, reject and deny it. In this episode, I help you see ten faces of gaslighting that can help you recognize it for what it is: emotional abuse. The actual definition of gaslighting I like from www.urbandictionary.com is: "an increasing frequency of systematically withholding factual information from, and/or providing false information to, the victim - having the gradual e...
GASLIGHTING: Sneaky Emotional Abuse
March 16, 2021 05:34 - 36 minutes - 29.6 MBUnderstanding the many faces of gaslighting helps you see it coming. Then, seeing it for what it is, you can discount it, reject and deny it. In this episode, I help you see ten faces of gaslighting that can help you recognize it for what it is: emotional abuse. The actual definition of gaslighting I like from www.urbandictionary.com is: "an increasing frequency of systematically withholding factual information from, and/or providing false information to, the victim - having the gradual e...
How Toxic Relationships Can Wear Down Your Body & Ruin Your Health - Guest: Dr. Elizabeth Hughes
March 12, 2021 04:23 - 42 minutes - 33.8 MBYou may think that you're experiencing the natural wear and tear on your health. But, if you're in a toxic relationship, it is making things so much worse! Learn about the most likely ways your body and its immune system can respond to toxic relationships with narcissistic people, or antisocial people. Talk about wear and tear!!! Two things that cause physical health issues (among many) start with emotional abuse: stress and isolation. Both of those are present in most relationships with Hi...
How to Finally Believe A Hijackal Doesn't Love You
March 09, 2021 05:32 - 33 minutes - 26.9 MBYou want to believe that a Hijackal--a toxic, difficult, perhaps narcissistic person--love you. You SO want to believe it. They don't have much love to give and here's 16 ways to recognize that they aren't giving it to you. An eye-opener! People who love you listen to you. They want to listen to you. And, you want to listen to them. You're interested in each other. Not so with a #Hijackal. The Hijackal is interested in themselves and want you to be interested in them, too. Sure, in the beg...
How Hijackals Hook You Into Toxic Relationships
March 02, 2021 04:41 - 33 minutes - 26.5 MBHijackals create toxic relationships, and it's important to see the patterns, traits, cycles, and behaviors clearly. That's not easy, but it is necessary. If you've been with a Hijackal or other toxic person for long, you may feel as though you suffer from brain fog. You can't think straight and you're too exhausted to do so anyway. Gain perspective about your situation and best next steps to consider in this episode. Hijackals are those relentlessly difficult, toxic people who seem so pe...
How Hijackals Hook You Into Toxic Relationships
March 02, 2021 04:41 - 33 minutes - 26.5 MBHijackals create toxic relationships, and it's important to see the patterns, traits, cycles, and behaviors clearly. That's not easy, but it is necessary. If you've been with a Hijackal or other toxic person for long, you may feel as though you suffer from brain fog. You can't think straight and you're too exhausted to do so anyway. Gain perspective about your situation and best next steps to consider in this episode. Hijackals are those relentlessly difficult, toxic people who seem so pe...
Can Narcissists Actually Make Lasting Changes to Stop the Abuse? GUEST: Dr. Laura Dabney
February 26, 2021 17:56 - 42 minutes - 33.9 MBYou hope, hope, hope that a narcissistic person will change. You buy into their promises to change. And, you cross your fingers! Change occurs for a hot minute...or even a warm week, right? And, then, nothing. What's up with that? People with narcissistic tendencies, or those diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder, have a hard time listening and caring about changes you would like to see. You know that already. So, will #Hijackals ever change? Can narcissists ever change? Do t...
How to Handle the Emotional Abuse of Microaggressions Using the PWR Response
February 23, 2021 04:30 - 30 minutes - 24.3 MBThe small, subtle, often sneaky words, actions, and gestures that are small or brief slights, insults, insinuations, or put downs used to marginalize you are microaggressions. These behaviors are frequent and painful. But, they are small and they catch you off guard, wondering if you should speak up. Or, would it be making a mountain out of a molehill? Is that familiar? Hand in hand with microaggressions are microinvalidations: small and frequent ways that you are discounted, dismissed, or...
How Vulnerability and Healing Can Prevent Toxic Masculinity
February 19, 2021 22:09 - 41 minutes - 33.3 MBEver wondered how you could possibly find forgiveness for a seemingly unforgivable act? Like being raped, beaten, and left for dead? Today's guest, Lois Wagner, found it, and she shares that journey with you today. Toxic relationships include many kinds of abuse: verbal abuse, emotional abuse, physical, sexual, financial, and spiritual abuse. Moving beyond the toxic relationships is the first step on the healing journey, with so much more to follow. In her book, Walking Without Skin: A Jou...
How Vulnerability and Healing Can Prevent Toxic Masculinity
February 19, 2021 22:09 - 41 minutes - 33.3 MBEver wondered how you could possibly find forgiveness for a seemingly unforgivable act? Like being raped, beaten, and left for dead? Today's guest, Lois Wagner, found it, and she shares that journey with you today. Toxic relationships include many kinds of abuse: verbal abuse, emotional abuse, physical, sexual, financial, and spiritual abuse. Moving beyond the toxic relationships is the first step on the healing journey, with so much more to follow. In her book, Walking Without Skin: A Jou...
EMOTIONAL BRAINWASHING
February 17, 2021 00:17 - 34 minutes - 27.6 MBSneaky stuff this emotional brainwashing! It often starts slowly and seems understandable. But, it continues and tips you over into second-guessing yourself and questioning your sanity, right? And, down the slippery slope! Listen in to uncover what may be happening--or has happened--to you. Great start! What's actual brainwashing? Cambridge Dictionary: "the process of making someone believe something by repeatedly telling them its true and preventing any other information from reaching th...
How the Strong Pull of Trauma-Bonding Creates Addiction to a Toxic Relationship
February 09, 2021 05:07 - 34 minutes - 27.5 MBTrauma-bonding is circular. The abuser creates the trauma, and then wants you to turn to them when you're hurt and traumatized. You are traumatized by something the abuser does, and you want the abuser to feel understood and you lean in. Circular! That's why it is SO important to understand the fourteen signs of a trauma-bonded person that I talk about in this episode. You may recognized the patterns--and the drama--that you are experiencing or have experienced. So helpful! Dr. Patrick Car...
How the Strong Pull of Trauma-Bonding Creates Addiction to a Toxic Relationship
February 09, 2021 05:07 - 34 minutes - 27.5 MBTrauma-bonding is circular. The abuser creates the trauma, and then wants you to turn to them when you're hurt and traumatized. You are traumatized by something the abuser does, and you want the abuser to feel understood and you lean in. Circular! That's why it is SO important to understand the fourteen signs of a trauma-bonded person that I talk about in this episode. You may recognized the patterns--and the drama--that you are experiencing or have experienced. So helpful! Dr. Patrick Car...
Recognizing The Impact of Shame in Toxic Relationships
February 05, 2021 22:37 - 37 minutes - 29.7 MBShame is often not spoken of, or acknowledged on both sides of an emotionally abusive relationship with anyone. Today's episode puts the spotlight on this component of emotional abuse, for both the perpetrator and the recipient. My guest, Beverly Engel, wrote in her most recent book, Escaping Emotional Abuse: Healing From the Shame You Don't Deserve: "Shame is the most destructive aspect of emotional abuse and it can be the most difficult to heal." Sometimes people stay in abusive relati...
EMOTIONAL ABUSE: The High Cost of Enabling a Narcissistic Hijackal
February 02, 2021 04:25 - 34 minutes - 27.5 MBYou think you're doing your best, giving your all, compromising, and cooperating. In a healthy relationship, that's great. In a toxic relationship, you'll be expected to over-give and more. It's a setup for emotional abuse. Listen in to see it even more clearly! You may hear the word "enabling" and know that it is not a good thing. That's true. Knowing what it IS so you can clearly observe it and recognize it is primary. My definition of enabling is: "When you usually step in to fix, ...
40 Underhanded, Undermining Signs of a Toxic Relationship
January 26, 2021 05:23 - 1 hour - 75.7 MBEvery now and again, everyone has an off minute, and says or does something unkind, thoughtless, or just plain hurtful. Toxic people have many traits that happen too consistently...and, too often. The difference between a person having a toxic moment, and a person who has many toxic traits is that the healthier person will acknowledge, take responsibility for, and apologize after behaving poorly. A #Hijackal--a relentlessly difficult, often narcissistic one--will not be accountable or respo...
Have ADHD? Why You Might Be An Unwitting Hijackal Magnet
January 22, 2021 17:14 - 45 minutes - 36.5 MBToxic relationships are created when a partner exploits the vulnerabilities of the other. If you have ADHD tendencies, you may easily miss red flags as you pay attention to the charms, and are intrigued by the possibilities of the fake future they paint so readily. Fear and shame also play a part you need to recognize. Hijackals have a honed sense of recognition of vulnerabilities. They are on high alert, looking for these to use to their advantage. You can be the most successful person an...
Why Not To Believe The Promise Of Change From A Narcissist - Dr. Rhoberta Shaler
January 19, 2021 05:07 - 33 minutes - 26.7 MBPeople with narcissistic tendencies and traits want to have their way, and want you to do their bidding. If they really, really, really want something, or, if they are really, really, really afraid of losing something, they sometimes promise to change. How many promises has a narcissist--a narcissistic #Hijackal--made to you about changing behaviors? How many of those promises were kept? Right! Not many. Oh, yes, maybe for a hot minute things improved. That is usually to get you to belie...
Got chemistry? Nice But Not Enough!
January 12, 2021 06:11 - 28 minutes - 23 MBHijackals use chemistry to manipulate and control you. They exploit it to feel they have power over you. It is a significant part of trauma-bonding. Get clear on what's really happening when you think you're in love, rather than knowing you're being used. HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE: What lust, attraction, and attachment have to do with creating toxic relationships Why #Hijackals want to recreate their trauma from a position of control What part trauma-bonding plays in thinking you ha...
The Endless, Exhausting Competitiveness of Hijackals in Toxic Relationships
January 05, 2021 05:53 - 39 minutes - 31.3 MBConstant emotional competition is exhausting. Most people only do it in one or two small areas of life. When you have a Hijackal parent or partner, it is a daily occurrence--even minute-to-minute--in large and tiny ways. Some ways, you may not even recognize. Listen to learn ten tips to help you emotionally disengage! That's the first, and maybe most important, step! #Hijackals turn every relationship into a competition. Even things you would not imagine they would find a need to win in, ...
Why Narcissistic People Hijack Holidays & Ruin Celebrations
December 29, 2020 05:22 - 37 minutes - 29.7 MBIt's common for Hijackals to ruin holidays. Narcissistic folks can be counted on to do it, too. What's up with that? They'll do it for any celebration. This episode will help you understand why it happens, AND offers practical suggestions for responding to it in healthier ways. You don't want to dread the holidays, yet that often happens. You just know that things are going to be tense, at a minimum, right? There are reasons why these sad folks get so mean around the holidays, or any cel...
Recognize When It's Become Verbal Abuse!
December 22, 2020 06:54 - 37 minutes - 55.1 MBYou might give someone the benefit of the doubt too often. You may be on the receiving end of verbal abuse AND it's important to be clear about it. Verbal abuse is bullying to win. It's unacceptable. Recognize the many faces of verbal abuse now! According to USLegal.com, verbal abuse is "words used to cause harm to the person being spoken to." It's all about the intent to cause harm: verbal, emotional harm. That can include shouting, insulting, intimidating, threatening, shaming, and d...
Recognize When It's Become Verbal Abuse!
December 22, 2020 06:54 - 37 minutes - 55.1 MBYou might give someone the benefit of the doubt too often. You may be on the receiving end of verbal abuse AND it's important to be clear about it. Verbal abuse is bullying to win. It's unacceptable. Recognize the many faces of verbal abuse now! According to USLegal.com, verbal abuse is "words used to cause harm to the person being spoken to." It's all about the intent to cause harm: verbal, emotional harm. That can include shouting, insulting, intimidating, threatening, shaming, and d...
What's Narcissistic? What's Self-Centered,? What's Healthy?
December 15, 2020 05:15 - 29 minutes - 23.5 MBThe term "narcissistic" is used too commonly now, in my opinion. When people even talk about themselves a little too much for your liking, you may label it "narcissistic." It's important to be able to tell the differences among people who are narcissistic, people who are self-centered, and those who are healthy and maybe having a bad day. Why? Because they require different responses. Both narcissistic and self-centered people talk about themselves more than most folks are comfortable with...
What's Narcissistic? What's Self-Centered,? What's Healthy?
December 15, 2020 05:15 - 29 minutes - 23.5 MBThe term "narcissistic" is used too commonly now, in my opinion. When people even talk about themselves a little too much for your liking, you may label it "narcissistic." It's important to be able to tell the differences among people who are narcissistic, people who are self-centered, and those who are healthy and maybe having a bad day. Why? Because they require different responses. Both narcissistic and self-centered people talk about themselves more than most folks are comfortable with...
Being Successful In Spite Of A Toxic Father GUEST: Corey Poirier
December 12, 2020 19:21 - 47 minutes - 38.3 MBSucceeding in spite of having toxic parents and a difficult past! We talk about that journey, and what succeeding really means. It's not about money only, but SO much more. A shaky emotional start in life doesn't define you. Don't let it! Corey Poirier, author of Book Of WHY, shares his path from life with an absent, though toxic, father to becoming the founder of bLU Talks, and being featured on the foremost radio and television shows, as well as being a columnist for top business magazi...
The SHAME Of It All: Narcissistic, Over-Nurturing Or Needy?
December 08, 2020 06:12 - 32 minutes - 26 MBShame is a painful emotion caused by recognizing guilt, shortcomings or impropriety, and the basis for narcissistic, over-nurturing, and needy behaviors. SO important to recognize these to understand the dynamics and how you may be caught by the cycle of shame in toxic relationships with partners and parents. Things happen when you're little and you don't realize what's becoming part of you. Being shamed at an early age by the people who were supposed to protect you makes a huge impact on ...
Tips on Negotiating Child Custody and Visitation GUEST: Andrea Schneider, Attorney
December 05, 2020 23:52 - 38 minutes - 38.9 MBDivorce is difficult, especially when you have children. Multiply the difficulties by tens if you're divorcing a #Hijackal, a #narcissistic person, or any other toxic person. You want to feel confident about negotiating custody and negotiating visitation. Andrea Schneider, attorney in San Diego, offers what you need to know to do your best in mediation and court. Andrea Schneider recognizes the added difficulties of dealing with divorce after years of stress, distress, anxiety, and put do...
Narcissistic Folks: Unable Or Unwilling To Empathize?
December 01, 2020 06:39 - 26 minutes - 40 MBLack of empathy in one partner creates a deficit that the other partner cannot fill...no matter how hard one tries! Learn more about the differences in functioning, and the decisions #Hijackals and other narcissistic people make about demonstrating empathy. Eye-opening! Empathy is the ability to identify what someone is thinking or feeling, and then to be able to respond to THEIR thoughts and feelings with an appropriate response. Can the person you have in mind do this? When do they do ...
Narcissistic Folks: Unable Or Unwilling To Empathize?
December 01, 2020 06:39 - 26 minutes - 40 MBLack of empathy in one partner creates a deficit that the other partner cannot fill...no matter how hard one tries! Learn more about the differences in functioning, and the decisions #Hijackals and other narcissistic people make about demonstrating empathy. Eye-opening! Empathy is the ability to identify what someone is thinking or feeling, and then to be able to respond to THEIR thoughts and feelings with an appropriate response. Can the person you have in mind do this? When do they do ...
Isolation: A Nasty Tactic of Coercive Control
November 24, 2020 06:42 - 49 minutes - 39.3 MBWhen you are first with a #Hijackal, you are flattered that they want you all to themselves. You're delighted that they want to be with you, and "can't get enough of you." That's the normal joy of a new relationship. Then, when you're with a toxic person, a #Hijackal, a #narcissist, there comes a moment when you find yourself isolated, alone, and marginalized. You look around and you have been separated from your family and friends. #Hijackals are happy then. You're not and in this episod...
Isolation: A Nasty Tactic of Coercive Control
November 24, 2020 06:42 - 49 minutes - 39.3 MBWhen you are first with a #Hijackal, you are flattered that they want you all to themselves. You're delighted that they want to be with you, and "can't get enough of you." That's the normal joy of a new relationship. Then, when you're with a toxic person, a #Hijackal, a #narcissist, there comes a moment when you find yourself isolated, alone, and marginalized. You look around and you have been separated from your family and friends. #Hijackals are happy then. You're not and in this episod...
The Differences Between Well-Formed vs Badly-Formed Love GUEST: Dr. Gary Salyer
November 21, 2020 21:48 - 31 minutes - 32.5 MBAre you suffering as a result of what Dr. Gary Salyer calls "badly-formed love?" You could be. Suffering is part of it, for sure. And, so much more. Do you know what well-formed love is? Have you seen it when you were growing up, or created it as an adult? Were you comfortable with it? BIG QUESTIONS! Dr. Gary Salyer has been my guest on Save Your Sanity before, and we talked about Trauma-Bonding. He was also on my Emotional Savvy podcast and we talked in-depth about Attachment Theor...
Intimidation and Coercive Control: How and Why It's Holding You Hostage - Dr. Rhoberta Shaler
November 17, 2020 05:48 - 32 minutes - 48.6 MBYou're worn, torn, and put down. You're exhausting in every way. The #narcissist, the #Hijackal, see that as an accomplishment. Hijackals are intimidating. They expect you to comply with their wishes, wants, demands, and supposed needs. #Hijackals threaten you. They want to instill fear and make you dependent on them, all the while complaining that you are, right? It's SO important that you recognize the ways--small and large--that emotional abusers intimidate you, or could intimidate y...
Self-Centered, Selfish Or Narcissistic? GUEST: Dr. Laura Dabney
November 14, 2020 19:37 - 42 minutes - 42.2 MBThere can be a razor's edge difference between a self-centered person and a narcissistic one. Does it really matter if you know when you are dealing with them? Dr. Laura Dabney offers her experience as a psychiatrist dealing with some of the most difficult cases in the field. Her insights will help you more deeply understand those differences between a generally self-centered person, and a truly narcissistic one. I've often spoken about "healthy selfishness" and we continue that convers...
Boomeranging: How To Leave and Stay Gone!
November 10, 2020 06:13 - 35 minutes - 52.5 MBIt's common for folks to desperately find their way to get away from a toxic relationship. Then, the doubts start, as well as the pleading and promises from a toxic spouse. You'll need these helpful insights into how to plan to leave so that you won't give in to the temptation to return. And, if you have left, what to do when you want to go running back to the abuse. Yes, you're leaving a toxic person, a #Hijackal, because they are emotionally abusive. You may not want to think of it as a...
How Differences in Attachment Affect the Wisdom of Staying Together GUEST: Jennifer Lehr
November 05, 2020 19:05 - 40 minutes - 40.6 MBWondering why your relationship always seems a bit off? Why you cannot get the emotional intimacy you crave? The Attachment Style you adopted as a result of your early life experiences plays a big part in how you create and relate with others. Knowing your Attachment Style provides you with invaluable insights into how you create relationships, what you expect from them, and where your fears about them lie. GOOD NEWS! Just because you may have had poor models of healthy relationships in...
Blame Shifting: Counteracting This Crazy-Making Way Narcissists Try To Win
November 03, 2020 06:37 - 36 minutes - 53.7 MBTry these strategies and tactics to change the dynamics in your relationship with a #Hijackal when they try to avoid responsibility or accountability, even--and especially--when they feel threatened by a potential flaw of theirs being mentioned. You know that everything will be your fault if you're with a narcissist, a Hijackal. The nasty skill of blame-shifting is a sneaky specialty. they hone carefully and practice faithfully. Infuriating. Frustrating. Unfair. So, how do you respond? It...
Successful Consultant Shares Her Story and Steps To Recovery From Toxic Relationships GUEST: Christie Lawler
October 30, 2020 18:52 - 38 minutes - 38.9 MBAn inspiring story of recovery and success after abuse in a toxic relationship! You'll be motivated by what my guest, Christie Lawler, shares. What she walked through, and went on to create is uplifting and positive. Just what you need to hear today? Probably! Christie Lawler is a successful consultant in what she calls the "eatertainment space." Very clever! She has thrived, but she walked through a lot of pain, second-guessing, and wondering. Being in a toxic relationship is confusing, a...