Looking For The Middle: The Christian’s Guide to Modern Dating
350 episodes - English - Latest episode: 4 months ago - ★★★★★ - 159 ratingsThe Christian’s Guide To Modern Dating.
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Episodes
Backstage Pass: How Do I Bring Up Marriage?
May 06, 2022 09:00 - 11 minutes - 20.7 MBWe got this question from a male listener who has been dating his girlfriend for a while now and wants to know how to bring up discussions about marriage... not a proposal necessarily, but starting to broach the subject of spending a lifetime together. There are a lot of different factors to this, but we're taking a look at several common ones.
8 Ways to End Up Alone (...and how to avoid them)
May 04, 2022 09:00 - 46 minutes - 84.5 MBWell, this episode is a bit of a departure from what we would normally talk about, but as we've gone through this season, we've found that we've repeated the phrase "...and that's a good way to end up alone" a lot, so we decided to just devote a whole episode to it! So, we're covering all sorts of common things we all do that if we're not careful will ensure that we end up alone.
10 Common Dating Fears And What To Do About Them
April 27, 2022 14:00 - 54 minutes - 98.9 MBWe are diving into the things we're probably all scared of to some level but don't want to admit to! Are you afraid you'll become your parents? Are you afraid you're not "ready"? Are you afraid you don't know how to date to begin with? Well, we are right there with you... or, we have been at some point and can totally relate to how that can affect how you approach relationships. So, in this episode, we're breaking these fears down and taking a look at what you can replace it with instead.
Backstage Pass: Help! I Get Attached too Quickly
April 22, 2022 19:47 - 14 minutes - 27.2 MBThis was a really great question from one of our guy listeners! More often than not, it's us girls who talk about getting attached too quickly, but this is an issue that guys run into too, so today we're taking a look at how to navigate this tough situation and give some insight into the female perspective on this!
Things We Wish Our Moms (Generation) Knew
April 20, 2022 09:00 - 55 minutes - 101 MBDating is not what it once was! That's our starting point today and we're diving deeper into this idea and hopefully giving some clarity to a topic that seems to be at odds with older generations sometimes.
CouchCast on Steroids (Part 2)
April 13, 2022 09:00 - 45 minutes - 84.2 MBWe're continuing our Q&A series from our Facebook Group from last week... this week's questions include: How do you regain trust within yourself and eventually with someone when your trust was 100% broken by the person you dated previously? I’d love to hear more about dating in your 30s! I know there was an episode of dating in your 20s versus your 30s, but maybe there could be one specifically about 30s and how to navigate that. I feel like there are some unique challenges because both...
CouchCast Revisited: Can Guys & Girls Be Just Friends?
April 08, 2022 09:00 - 13 minutes - 24.3 MBWe're pulling another CouchCast from the archives and taking a look at how our opinions and thoughts have changed since we first recorded it. With this one, I don't know that they have "changed" so much as they've just evolved and matured. So, if you're wondering if you can just be friends with the guys in your life, take a listen and let us know what you think!
CouchCast on Steroids (Part 1)
April 06, 2022 11:32 - 49 minutes - 90.5 MBA couple of weeks ago, we asked our Facebook group what they wanted to hear us talk about and there were so many great questions we couldn't narrow it down! So, we're answering them all instead! Rapid fire style and like a CouchCast on steroids. Today's Questions: 1. Thoughts on dating someone who is divorced and/or has kids when you haven’t been divorced and don’t have kids. 2. How do you know if you’re dealing with a gut feeling, doubt, or self sabotage when you are first getting to kno...
Opposite Day: What We’ve Learned from Each Other
March 30, 2022 09:00 - 44 minutes - 82.2 MBKristen and I have discovered that we're complete opposites when it comes to dating, in a lot of ways... But, we've also discovered that "opposite" can often mean "great learning opportunity" too! In this episode, we're both taking a look at some of the things we've learned along the way from each other and also taking a look at the value of having people in your life who aren't exactly like you when it comes to dating.
CouchCast Revisited: Should a Girl Ask a Guy Out?
March 25, 2022 13:23 - 13 minutes - 25.3 MBI think this is probably the one topic that our thoughts have changed the most about since we originally recorded this CouchCast! It's also a huge lesson in "never say never..."
How to Approach Dating... Rules vs. Grace
March 23, 2022 09:00 - 1 hour - 121 MBIf you're like us, it's easy to find yourself with a list of requirements and boxes to check that you're measuring this guy up to. But, is that really the best way of producing a happy future marriage? Maybe not? We're taking a look at how to approach your "list", expectations, and managing being a rule follower when it comes to dating today.
Should This Be Just a Crush or Should I Really Like This Guy?
March 16, 2022 12:32 - 56 minutes - 104 MBWe answered a similar question during the 12 Days of CouchCast last year and it quickly became our most popular episode of all time! So, we knew there was plenty here to discuss in a full episode too. In this episode, we're giving you several guidelines for determining if this is the kind of guy who you should really like or if he should just remain a crush. Questions to ask yourself and qualities to look for in him too!
Backstage Pass: Girl ”A” Likes Me. I Like Her Friend, Girl ”B”. What Do I Do?
March 11, 2022 10:00 - 16 minutes - 30.5 MBThis question came in from one of our dear guy listeners and we can feel his pain! We've both been in very similar situations over the years and it can be tricky. We're taking a look at this potential problem from several different angles and coming up with several suggestions for how to figure out where Girl "A" stands without blowing up any friendships in the process!
Common Online Dating Questions... How to Ask and Answer them Better
March 09, 2022 10:00 - 1 hour - 138 MBWe all know that most of online dating is just managing to somehow stand out from the crowd! What better way to do that than with your answers to the most common questions you're going to be asked? We're giving you some great answers to questions, but that's not all... we're going to give you some alternative ways of asking them too. Just one more way to avoid blending in!
Do Opposites Really Attract?
March 02, 2022 10:00 - 50 minutes - 92.1 MBOk, we've all heard the age old adage "opposites attract".... do they really though? That's what we're taking a look at in this week's episode. Do opposites always attract? Does it matter which qualities are opposite? I mean, I don't want to date the boy version of me, but I don't want to be absolute polar opposites either. So, we're going to dive in and see what happens.
CouchCast Revisited: How Important Are Common Interests?
February 25, 2022 15:30 - 17 minutes - 31.9 MBCouchCast is going to look a little different this season! We're going back into the archives, wayyy back into the archives, and we are picking out some CouchCast questions that we know our thoughts have changed on since we originally recorded it and then we're going to take another crack at it with our new and updated thoughts! This should be fun... so today, we're diving into common interests and how important they really are.
Men Tell All! An Interview with Kevin (and Kristen)
February 23, 2022 10:00 - 1 hour - 173 MBOk guys... you've been (not so) patiently waiting for this! We are back and kicking things off with a bang! Kevin, Kristen's fiance, is here with us today and we are getting all of the details of their story. How they met, how they re-met, when they knew this was "the one", and what they've learned along the way. We can't wait for you guys to hear this!
12 Days of CouchCast: Day 12 - Do I Like Him or is it Just a Crush?
December 24, 2021 10:00 - 13 minutes - 25.1 MBMerry Christmas!! We have reached our final day of the 12 days of CouchCast and Christmas is tomorrow! We hope you guys are all able to take some time to relax, recharge, and enjoy friends and family. But, before that... we're taking a look at ways to tell between actually liking someone or just having a crush on them. It can be tough to tell the difference at the beginning sometimes so we're going to explore the difference between the two!
12 Days of CouchCast: Day 11 - I‘m Jealous of My Friend and Her New Boyfriend, What Do I Do?
December 23, 2021 10:00 - 11 minutes - 21 MBSo, your friend just started dating this new guy and he seems great, but now it's opened up this glaring hole in your life and you just want what she has... how do you combat the jealousy and bitterness that you might find creeping in? That's what we're diving into today!
12 Days of CouchCast: Day 10 - When to Bring Up Kids
December 22, 2021 10:00 - 14 minutes - 26.2 MBWell this one can be a doozy! Kids and when to have them can be a pressurized topic sometimes. When is the best time to bring up kids and not seem too "heavy"? What if you don't want to have biological kids? How do you approach all of these things with the guy you're dating?
12 Days of CouchCast: Day 9 - Why Does the Church Equate Marriage with Spiritual Maturity
December 21, 2021 10:00 - 11 minutes - 21.8 MBI bet you guys are all nodding your heads in agreement just after reading that title, aren't you? We sure were! It seems that the church at large holds up marriage as a symbol of spiritual maturity, but is that really even a valid assumption? Why does the church do this? Is it intentional? These are all things we're diving into today!
12 Days of CouchCast: Day 8 - When You‘re the Only Single Person Left at the Holidays
December 20, 2021 10:00 - 13 minutes - 24.7 MBDoes it seem like everyone has someone this Christmas? Do you feel like you're the only person who doesn't? We get it! We're speaking from our plentiful 1st hand experience on this one... things we've done, and are doing, to combat the loneliness and bitterness that threaten around this time of year!
12 Days of CouhCast: Day 7 - Can You Know ”Too Much” About Dating?
December 19, 2021 10:00 - 10 minutes - 19.4 MBWe might be out of a job if talking and thinking about dating is a problem! haha The original question is a good one though.... is it possible to know too much about dating to the point that it is detrimental to your relationships? At it's core, I think this comes down to overthinking... knowing a lot about dating is helpful... overthinking a lot about dating is not. We're going to get into this all more in today's episode!
12 Days of CouchCast: Day 6 - Not Dating in a Bubble When Family Isn‘t Around
December 18, 2021 10:00 - 11 minutes - 21 MBNot dating in a bubble can be tough enough as it is... add a toxic or distant family into the mix and it gets even tougher! When you're the only believer in your family and they just don't understand your standards, boundaries, and worldview, it can seem impossible! So, today we're taking a look at some ways to bring community into your relationship when your family isn't your closest community.
12 Days of CouchCast: Day 5 - Moving On When the Guy I Like is Dating Someone Else
December 17, 2021 10:00 - 12 minutes - 22.4 MBWe've all been there, right? You like this guy and have been trying to drop some hints, only to find out he's actually started dating someone else... not fun! It can almost feel like a break-up from your side, but he doesn't even know. We've got some tips and strategies for moving on even when it's hard.
12 Days of CouchCast: Day 4 - Should You Always Have Important Conversations in Person?
December 16, 2021 10:00 - 12 minutes - 22.6 MBSometimes it's easier to remember everything you want to say if you write it down first, or you can talk without someone else sitting there waiting to respond, but does that mean it's ok to have big, important conversations (think DTR) over text message or a voice recording app?
12 Days of CouchCast: Day 3 - It‘s Not Halloween, but Let‘s Talk About Ghosting
December 15, 2021 10:00 - 13 minutes - 24 MBThis question takes a different approach to the ghosting issue... what if you you both just don't text or call after a date? Is it still ghosting? Mutual ghosting? Does that make it ok?
12 Days of CouchCast: Day 2 - How Do I Help My Friend Not Stay Hung-Up Over This Guy?
December 14, 2021 10:00 - 12 minutes - 23.6 MBWe got this question from a caring friend who has tried to tactfully tell her friend that she doesn't think the guy she's crushing on is actually interested.... and now, she's not sure where to go from here. We've been in this place, so today we're looking at ways to help your friend move on when the guy's just not interested but also keep your friendship intact at the same time.
12 Days of CouchCast: Day 1 - I‘ve Been Blindsided by a Breakup, Now What Do I Do?
December 13, 2021 10:00 - 14 minutes - 27.1 MBHonestly, we wish none of you guys ever had to deal with this, but unfortunately that's just not possible! When you've been broken up with out of the blue like this, it's easy to feel a little lost at sea, so to speak. This is something we've had to walk through and we'll be taking a look at some of the things that have helped us in the past.
What is Love?
December 08, 2021 10:00 - 1 hour - 122 MBIs this a loaded question or what?! But, what better time to answer it than at Christmas time when we are focused on the greatest demonstration of love ever? God sent His Son, to redeem His people in the ultimate display of love. We're taking a look at some of your common questions about love... how do I know I'm in love? When to say I love you? and more. Then, we're going to take a look at what we can learn about love from God's love for us.
Backstage Pass: Why is a Confidence in a Guy so Attractive?
December 03, 2021 11:48 - 15 minutes - 29.1 MBWe have talked a lot about confidence, and how attractive it is, on this podcast. So, the question was posed... WHY is it attractive? What is it about a confident guy that is just so attractive? That's the question we're answering today!
Being Single in the Church
December 01, 2021 10:00 - 1 hour - 118 MBIt's our "Question Episode" for this season! We asked you guys what are the hard parts and what are the good parts of being single in the church? And oh boy, did you guys have things to say! We created this episode entirely around the feedback we got from you.
It‘s Gameday!
November 24, 2021 10:00 - 56 minutes - 104 MBThis is a little different than our usual episode format! Since it's a holiday week, we're going to have some fun with it! Today, we're playing games... dating games to be specific... Would You Rather, True/False, and Never Have I Ever. It was super fun and if you go follow along on IG (@lftm_podcast) on release day, you can play too! Then, we're going to take a look at the games we all tend to play when it comes to dating. Playing hard to get, stringing people along, all that sort of thing...
CouchCast: How do I Stop the Self-Sabotage in Relationships?
November 19, 2021 10:00 - 25 minutes - 47 MBThis was one of our longest CouchCast episodes ever! We loved this conversation. As two girls who definitely have self-sabotage tendencies when it comes to relationships, we can definitely relate. We discuss what can cause this kind of thinking, what we should be thinking instead, how to overcome it, and the role your community plays in this.
Men Tell All! An Interview with Dalton
November 17, 2021 10:00 - 1 hour - 159 MBOur Men Tell All series returns with this interview with Dalton Teal. Dalton is 26 years old and works in full-time ministry. This was a great conversation that provided lots of insight into the male brain when it comes to dating, wisdom for pursuing Godly relationships, and plenty of laughs along the way. Normally, we trim these down and only release the full-length interview on Patreon, but we just couldn't decide what to cut out, so enjoy all of it!
Men Tell All: An Interview w/Jared - Uncut Version
November 10, 2021 10:00 - 1 hour - 181 MBIf you follow us on Instagram (@lftm_podcast), you saw yesterday that we had some unexpected audio issues with this week's original episode and we're going to have to re-record part of it. So, in the meantime, enjoy this full, uncut interview with Jared that was previously only released on Patreon in its full length form. In this Men Tell All episode, we interviewed Kristen's boss, Jared. He is a great godly husband and father who brings a great variety of perspective to this series. We ...
Backstage Pass: As a Guy, Should I Let My Female Friends Know I Want to Date Someone?
November 05, 2021 09:00 - 10 minutes - 18.7 MBThe answer to this question could go two ways... Are you interested in dating one of your friends or do you just want them to be on the lookout for someone you could date? We're taking a look at both scenarios in today's episode.
How to Talk to Single People
November 03, 2021 09:00 - 1 hour - 115 MBLet's be honest... it can be tricky sometimes trying to figure out what to say, or what not to say, to single friends. Whether you yourself are single or not, either way it can be tough. We're taking a look at some of the things that are really helpful and encouraging, and then some of the things that aren't really all that helpful too. We're also talking about extending lots of grace! **We go on several rabbit trails at the beginning. You've been warned! If that's not your thing, skip to...
Dating in a Social Media Age
October 27, 2021 09:00 - 1 hour - 112 MBWe all know the internet and social media are everywhere! This is not news to anyone... between ordering groceries online, buying a car online, it would naturally follow that we should just be able to order a husband from Amazon, right?! Dating in a social media age though isn't quite that simple. It's not all bad either. In today's episode, we're looking at some ways the internet and social media have helped dating (when used correctly) and then also some drawbacks to it as well.
CouchCast: Is it a Red Flag to Guys if I Haven‘t Ever Been in a Serious Relationship?
October 22, 2021 09:00 - 16 minutes - 30.3 MBI think this was Kristen's favorite ever CouchCast question! ....the person asking made a reference to The Bachelor in her question and that's all it took! If you find yourself in this same place of worrying about what potential dates might think of your previous dating history (or lack thereof), we're talking about several different perspectives you can take that will hopefully lessen that worry and burden!
Are We Equally Yoked?
October 20, 2021 09:00 - 1 hour - 129 MBThis term "equally yoked" gets thrown around a lot, but do you know how to apply it to your current or future relationships? Sometimes it gets over-simplified to "just marry someone who loves Jesus"... and sometimes we make it way more complicated than it has to be. So, today, we're taking a look at what 2 Corinthians 6:14 does say, what it doesn't say, and how you can take the principle behind it and apply it to your relationship, or future relationship, today.
It‘s Ok for Dating to be Fun!
October 13, 2021 09:00 - 56 minutes - 103 MBWe over-think. We over-complicate. We over-analyze. And in the process we end up looking at dating as a chore rather than a fun experience! It's ok for dating to be fun! Let's put some of that fun back into it.... we've got some tips and ideas for doing just that today.
Backstage Pass: What Can I Do to Make Myself More Attractive to a Girl?
October 08, 2021 09:00 - 14 minutes - 27.2 MBThis was a great question from one of our male listeners! We're taking a look at those intangible things that really up the attractiveness factor outside of someone's looks!
What Are You Waiting For?
October 06, 2021 09:00 - 42 minutes - 77.5 MBIf you heard last week's episode, you heard us talk about what it looks like when life doesn't go according to plan and you find yourself in a season of waiting. Today, we're going to take that a step further and look at what to do while you're waiting. We're answering questions like what are you actually waiting for? What's the purpose of waiting? and what to do in the meantime?
When Life Hasn‘t Gone According to Plan
September 29, 2021 09:00 - 51 minutes - 94.2 MBWe can all say this to some extent, right? Life never fully goes how we plan and especially when it comes to dating and relationships, we will most likely all find our lives going somewhat differently than we had planned. Does that mean God's forgotten us? Is He still good? What does His Word have to say about the feelings that come along with a life that didn't go according to plan?
CouchCast: When to Bring up Physical Boundaries
September 24, 2021 09:00 - 14 minutes - 26.9 MBThere's a tricky balance between talking about the deeper, important things and "scaring someone off". A lot of it comes down to timing and how you choose to broach the subject in the first place. So, today, we're taking a look at those things and offering some advice from the times we've had these same conversations.
What Does Pursuit Look Like?
September 22, 2021 09:00 - 42 minutes - 78 MBThis is one of our most requested topics! How do I know a guy's interested? What will he do when he is? Is he pursuing? Is it ok for me to pursue? We get all of these questions on the regular, so today we're breaking down pursuit... what it looks like, what it doesn't, how it looks at different relationship stages, and more!
Dating Advice from Kindergarten
September 15, 2021 09:00 - 53 minutes - 98.9 MBWe're convinced you learned everything you needed to know about dating before you ever left Kindergarten! And today, we're going to walk through the top 10 things on that list... clean up your own mess, use your words, keep your hands to yourself, and more!
Don‘t Date in a Bubble
September 10, 2021 09:00 - 43 minutes - 79.3 MBIt's the second half of "Mantra Week" today and we're rounding things out with Bethany's mantra, "Don't Date in a Bubble". We're going to talk about what it looks like when you are dating in a bubble, what it looks like when you're not dating in a bubble, and what to do if you find yourself in a dating bubble but want to get out.
You Want to be With Someone Who Wants to be With You
September 08, 2021 09:00 - 54 minutes - 100 MBSeason 7 is here! And we're kicking the season off with "Mantra Week". Over the past few seasons we've both developed what could be called our dating mantras... and if you've been around for a bit, you've for sure heard them! Kristen's is "You want to be with someone who wants to be with you!" So, to kick-off our new season with a bang, we've decided to do an entire episode on each of those mantras. This is going to be fun!