Late To The Table

Ep. 333 Black Swan: Kill Yourself University

Oh man. Another banner week on your favorite podcast, Late to the Table! Does 2010’s(?!?) Black Swan hold up? Have we made the perfect episode of this podcast? BECAUSE I FELT IT. I WANT TO BE PERFECT. MORE FART JOKES! MORE AVENGERS JOKES, YES, YES. PERFECT.

Ep. 332 Oliver & Company: Goodship Lollipopping

America’s foremost forensic experts investigate the forgotten Disney film, Oliver & Company. Does it hold up in 2022 or is it just a pile of Billy Joel leavings? Ch-ch-check it out babies!

Ep. 331 F9:Optimus Subprime Mortgage Loans

Ep. 330 Armageddon: Kurt Russell Is The Light Of The Valinor

Let’s take another dip into the Michael Bay, bay-bee!  Can Armageddon possibly hold up?  I mean it’s got a pretty good cast.  Ben Affleck is there too.  Eddie Griffin has an immortal dog.  What's not to like?  Right?  RIGHT?!

Ep. 329 The Notebook: E for Enabler

Mike and Rich drop in to check out 2004’s The Notebook.  Is it a timeless love story of days gone past or does it not hold up to the harsh light of 2022?  Find out baby!

Ep. 328 The Fly: J. Jonah Jameson’s Penis Cage

We’ve watched Jeff Goldblum transform in his career from a sexy leading man to a sexy eccentric grandpa.  Now we watch him turn into a goddamn hamburger skinned fly.  Does David Cronenberg’s cult classic movie hold up? WE. WILL. PROBABLY. TELL. YOU!

Ep. 327 Amistad: Frame Perfect Boobies

The crew checks out the quasi-forgotten Spielberg film, Amistad.  Does this 1997 legal thriller hold up in 2022 or are we just distracted by a young Matthew McConaughey cosplaying?  FIND OUT MY DUDES. 

Ep. 326 Train to Busan: Nic Cage Flailing

Whoa whoa whoa.  Who goes there?  Is it a refreshing take on the zombie genre or a train to no where?  TRAIN TO BUSAN, DOES IT HOLD UP?  FIND OUT YOU INFANT.

Ep. 325 8 Mile: Rap Vision of the Future

The guys lose themselves in the moment of checking out a movie that is somehow twenty fucking years old.  Holy shit.  Does the Eminem quasi biopic hold up or is it just vomiting spaghetti?  FIND OUT BABY.

Ep. 324 The Green Mile: Good Snake Powers

The gang attempts to go 3/3 watching good movies in 2022!  Can they do it, or will they become way too depressed by The Green Mile?!?  I don’t want to brag, but I’m ALWAYS depressed!  Do your worst Frank Darabont!

Ep. 323: Eastern Promises: Doogie Howser Vape Juice

Aw Yeah baybee!  It’s time for another episode of America’s only podcast, Late To The Table.  Does the 2007 David Cronenberg film Eastern Promises hold up in 2022?  Who brings a dong to a knife fight?  What animal would you feel comfortable having sex in front of? FIND OUT NOW.

Ep. 322 Heat: Michael Mann Infinity Gauntlet

Whooooaaa Nellie!  The gang kicks off 2022 proper with an extra long and meaty episode of Late to the Table!  Does the 1995 movie heat hold up or is it just a beautiful doll house of mid 90s action?  FIND OUT NOW YOU LITTLE INFANTS. 

Ep. 321 2021 A Year In Review: A Year Of Joel Edergtons

The boys countdown their top and bottom 5 movies of the year.  Rich accidentally time travels. Mike tries to break a curse by finding a loophole where you make love to an automobile.  You know.  Standard stuff. 

Ep. 320 Howl’s Moving Castle: Sephiroth Granny Fetish

Ho ho ho howelcome!  To the last Late To The Table of 2021!  Does the 2004 Miyzaki film Howl’s Moving Castle hold up to two sexy losers in 2021?  Or is the thin veneer of the main character’s criminal actions wash away like so many tears in the rain?  HELL IF I KNOW DAWG! But you can find out…..now!

Ep. 329 National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation: Joff Bozos, A Christmas Carol

It’s that time of year!  The crew of elves here at Late To The Table are watching your favorite holiday films!  Does the 1989 Christmas vacation hold up?  Do any John Hughes films really hold up?  Does Chevy Chase really hold up?  He looks terrible. 

Ep. 319 National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation: Joff Bozos, A Christmas Carol

It’s that time of year!  The crew of elves here at Late To The Table are watching your favorite holiday films!  Does the 1989 Christmas vacation hold up?  Do any John Hughes films really hold up?  Does Chevy Chase really hold up?  He looks terrible. 

Ep. 328 My Best Friend’s Wedding: Sleek, Sexy, Giamatti Legs

Rich is getting married in real life!  Will this 1997 Julia Roberts vehicle inspire his love to great new heights?  Probably not.  She’s like a sociopath here.  I mean jeez.  BUT DOES IT HOLD UP?  FIND OUT NOW YOU LOVELY BONES. 

Ep. 318 My Best Friend’s Wedding: Sleek, Sexy, Giamatti Legs

Rich is getting married in real life!  Will this 1997 Julia Roberts vehicle inspire his love to great new heights?  Probably not.  She’s like a sociopath here.  I mean jeez.  BUT DOES IT HOLD UP?  FIND OUT NOW YOU LOVELY BONES. 

Ep. 317 The Iron Giant: Mad Max Awareness Month

In 1999 Brad Bird had one mission: make grown assed adults cry.  I’m proud to say here, 22 years later, he has succeeded.  Does the Iron Giant hold up?  Why are all movie parents bad parents?  Did Rich only want to watch this movie because it was brought up in Ted Lasso?  FIND OUT SOON YOU SWEET LITTLE NUGGETS.  

Ep. 327 The Iron Giant: Mad Max Awareness Month

In 1999 Brad Bird had one mission: make grown assed adults cry.  I’m proud to say here, 22 years later, he has succeeded.  Does the Iron Giant hold up?  Why are all movie parents bad parents?  Did Rich only want to watch this movie because it was brought up in Ted Lasso?  FIND OUT SOON YOU SWEET LITTLE NUGGETS.  

Ep. 316 It Follows: Blue Whale Sex Loophole

The guys finish their spooktacular on a high note! Mike and Rich check in to see if the 2014 film, It Follows, rocks it or sucks shit.  Topics include Dune and so so so much besitality.

Ep. 315 Paranormal Activity: Batman Adoption Criteria

BOOOOOOOOOO babies!  It’s October and you know what that means!  It’s time for another spooktacular!  Does the 2007 found footage film Paranormal Activity hold up?  You know what’s not scary? The dope ass profit margins of this movie.  If we play our cards right we’re gonna be rich!* *Home and garden podcast, Late To The Table declare bankruptcy later that day

Ep. 314: Oceans 11: A Battalion of Stripper Cops

We’re looking to put together a crew with a very particular set of skills.  Skills to steal the jokes from 3 other movie podcasts owned by Andy Garcia.  Are you in or out?  Right now.  I need to know.  You’re out?  You’re wearing a wire? SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT…also does Oceans 11 hold up?  Find out babies!

Ep. 313: The Mask: That Donkey Kong Liquor License

The greatest trick the devil ever played on mankind was giving them nostalgic feelings about Jim Carey’s The Mask.  Does it hold up?  Will Rich’s suggestion of watching The Mask strain their friendship past the breaking point?  Are there wholly inappropriate Rodney King jokes in this movie? FIND OUT YOU BABY COWARDS.

Ep. 312 Cowboy Bebop: May Cause Severe Anal Leakage

The guys check out the first three episodes of the seminal anime, Cowboy Bebop.  Does it hold up to two handsome nerds in 2021?  Why erry’budy so hungry?  Is your dog and NFT?  Find out now!

Ep. 311 Stand By Me: Maine Cinematic Universe

Come original to episode 311 of Late To The Table!  Mike and Rich are super sleepy and lose their goddamn minds.  Topics include, deer, deer, and getting your balls ripped off.  Uh oh!

Ep. 310 Minority Report: Bayou Bond And The Precogators

The gang watches a Tom Cruise movie that doesn’t seem like it should be 20 fucking years old.  Holy shit.  Man.  Where did the time go?  We’re all just dust in the wind brought to you by nokia and aquafina.

Ep. 309 The Wiz: The John Wickzard Of Oz

I don’t think anyone reads these descriptions.  Sure.  I could talk about if the 1978 The Wiz holds up...ORRRR I could let you in on my dark secret.  For the past 5 years I’ve hidden clues in all of these episode descriptions as to the true identity of the golden state killer!  What?  He was caught?  Well.  Shit.  What have I been doing with my time then?

Ep. 308 The French Connection: A Bob Hoskins Wolverine At Popeyes

The guys watch the highly decorated, prestige film The French Connection to see if it holds up.  Tempers flare and nothing is as it seems when Mike forever ruins Rich’s favorite fast food haven.  Who will survive the coming purge?  FIND OUT BABIES.

Ep. 307 Kingsmen, The Secret Service: People Be Horny

Well, well, well.  Look who showed back up.  You have a lot of nerve coming to this podcast feed.  Acting like you know something about nothing when you really know nothing about something!  You disgust me.  I bet you don't even know if the 2014 movie Kingsmen holds up!  Wait.  You do?  You're director Matthew Vaughn?  SHIT. Scatter!

Ep.306 Clue: Male Gaze Powers, ACTIVATE

The guys are uncharacteristically on track while watching the 1985 movie Clue.  Does it hold up or is it a mercenary cash grab?  Is it a piece of anti-capitalist film?  Is anyone going to help Tim Curry carry the weight of this dang thing?  FIND OUT YOU INFANTS. 

305: Kung Fu Panda: Don Bluth, Smut Consultant

The gang continues “MAY I Watch Jack Black Movies? Month” with the 2008 animated film Kung Fu Panda.  Does this Dreamworks film reach for the stars or crash to earth among the slovenly lives of pathetic mortals?  FIND OUT NOW.

304: School of Rock: Andy Serkis’ CGI Tears, “I Can’t Mo-Cap My Pain Away…”

The Late to the Table crew check in on Richard Linklater’s School of Rock and finally invent a new drinking game that will kill you.  Topics include the agility of Jack Black, dick rating services, and Andy Serkis being everywhere, even right behind you...RIGHT NOW!

303: Training Day: R2-What He Has 2

The guys check out Denzel’s electric performance in the 2001 classic, Training Day.  They discuss R2-D2, VR Fantasies, and Mike almost poops himself. You know, standard Late To The Table.

302: Fate of the Furious: Genre Chameleon

Hey sorry for the late upload but you know how life be.   On the heels of watching one the greatest films of all time, the Late To The Table crew watch one of the most fast and most furious movies in cinematic history.  Does it hold up?  Find out babies!

Ep. 301 Seven Samurai (Part Two): Grandma War Crime

The boys give it all they’ve got and learn lessons about life, love, and becoming aroused by the prospect of plane crashes.  Does the 1954 film Seven Samurai hold up in 2021?  FIND OUT NOW. 

Ep. 300 Seven Samurai (Part One): A Village of William H. Macys

Mike and Rich’s friendship finally comes to the breaking point as they battle it out in episode 300 of America’s number one home and garden podcast.  Does Akira Kurosawa’s 1954 samurai epic stand the test of time?  How horny are ronin?  Ready to dunk on some famers?  LET’S GO BABIES. 

Ep. 299 Se7en: Spaghetti Trap House

On the eve of their 300th episode the guys explore the themes, motifs, and grossness of David Fincher’s Se7en.  How much do they talk about Sonic the Hedgehog?  MORE THAN YOU MIGHT THINK! GET INTO IT.

Ep. 298 Logan’s Run: Racist Utopia

Logan may be running and may be a highly influential 1970s sci fi film, BUT DOES IT HOLD UP TO TWO RADICAL DUDES IN 2021?!

Ep. 298 Logan’s Run: Racist Utopia

Logan may be running and may be a highly influential 1970s sci fi film, BUT DOES IT HOLD UP TO TWO RADICAL DUDES IN 2021?!

Ep. 297 Platoon: Snickerdoodle Planking

Does the 1986 Oliver Stone film hold up?  Vietnam may be hell but any movie with Keith David in it must be heaven!  Right?  Find out you cheese dicks!  (That’s a reference...I didn’t just lose my mind.

Ep. 296 The Town: Ben Affleck Nursery Themes

What ho you nerds!  We're doing it!  We're trying to watch only good movies in 2021!  Will Ben Affleck stop us?  NO NOTHING CAN STOP US!

Ep. 295 Akira: Agrabah Magical Forensics

Akira? Hold up? Movie good? Bad movie?  Out find? NOW!

Ep. 294 2020, A Year In Review: TNT Standards

The guys look back on the poop chute of a year.  Did they watch good movies?  Bad movies?  Did they survive? FIND OUT.

Ep. 293 Rankin & Bass Christmas Special Combo: Rudolph’s Sexual Awakenin

The guys watch the classic Rankin & Bass Christmas specials, Santa Claus Is Comin’ To Town and Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer.  Do these holiday stalwarts hold up for a person on the go in the dumpster fire that is 2020?  Find out you yuletide yokel!

Ep. 292 Grave Of The Fireflies: Death Note’s Death Boat’s Death Goat

Wow!  The perfect 2020 movie...bleak, sad, juuuuuust the right amount of abject suffering. BUT DOES IT HOLD UP IN 2020?  I mean...I just said it’s the perfect 2020 movie.  BUT CAN YOU REALLY TRUST ME?  Think of all I have to gain, access to your delicious anime suffering dollars. 

Ep. 291 Joke: Art Deco Supercomputer

The boys dive head first into DC comics lore and engage in a stupid discussion about the artistic merits of Todd Phillips’ Joker.  Does it hold up one year later? What job would you trust the Joker to do?  How do Batman villains get into this country?  Find out if you want to...it’s not a big deal if you don’t.

Ep. 291 Joker: Art Deco Supercomputer

The boys dive head first into DC comics lore and engage in a stupid discussion about the artistic merits of Todd Phillips’ Joker.  Does it hold up one year later? What job would you trust the Joker to do?  How do Batman villains get into this country?  Find out if you want to...it’s not a big deal if you don’t.

Ep. 290 Glory: Fiverr For Racists

The guys accidentally watched a hyper pertinent movie on the night before the election of 2020 was decided. Does Glory hold up? How woke can an 80s movie really be? Does Ferris Bueller take a day off because he's tired of flogging? Find out babies!

Ep. 289 I Know What You Did Last Summer: James Earl Jones’ Sexy Teen Body

Let’s keep spooking!  Does the1997 slasher film hold up?  What’s REALLY the best way to murder someone? Find out now you little ghosts and ghouls!