092: Surviving Loss and Divorce: A Journey Towards Healing and Hope with Jon Hazilla

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Next Episode: 093: From Trauma to Triumph: A Journey of Healing and Self-Discovery with Dr. Allison Jackson-Dyer

Welcome to Rock Your Shine: After you’ve been cracked wide open. On this show, I sit down with people from all over the world to hear their transformational stories on their deep grief and loss journeys.

In this episode, we delve into the depths of grief and loss with Jon Hazilla, who has experienced unimaginable pain. Jon shares his heartbreaking journey of losing three siblings and going through a divorce while processing deep grief. Discover the transformative power of 'heart play' and gain insights into understanding your own dark place.

Jon opens up about his experience with therapy and his thoughts on medication. We explore practical tools to pull yourself out of a dark place and discuss whether Jon took time to withdraw and shut everything out. Navigating the loss of his siblings and the impact of divorce on handling other losses are explored.

We delve into the topic of receiving signs from the other side and how Jon tapped into music and playfulness as sources of healing. Discover how Jon found moments of joy while still in darkness. We also explore what Jon's relationship with his ex-wife looks like post-divorce and gain insights into his journey of self-love.

Jon Hazilla has performed and/or recorded with: Jo Anne Brackeen, James Williams, John Hicks, Billy Taylor, Aaron Goldberg, Ray Drummond, Ron Carter, George Garzone, Benny Golson, Billy Pierce, Steve Grossman, Larry Coryell, Kenny Wheeler, Sheila Jordan, Ran Blake, John Clayton, and Max Roach. He continues to perform in countless global festivals from the Azores to Costa Rica, Warsaw, Rome, Nice, Serbia, and Kyoto, to name a few. He is a graduate of New England Conservatory of Music.

He received a National Endowment Award in 1987, The Robert Porter Memorial Advancement Award in Education from the American Federation of Teachers in 2002, a Berklee Fellowship Grant in 2006, and the Steelgrass residency in Kauai, Hawaii in 2012.

Jon has produced eight CDs as a leader, and recorded over 45 more as a sideman. Berklee Press published his first book Mastering the Art of Brushes in 2002, and its second edition in 2017. His second book Rhythmic Reflections on Creative Teaching was published by Mosaic Eye Publishing in 2013. Hal Leonard released his DVD Brush Control in 2008.

He is co-founder of “Jazz on Wheels,” a volunteer group of musicians that performs free concerts at Boston Public libraries for inner-city children. He was a mentor for the City Music Program, volunteered for Habitat for Humanity helping survivors of Hurricane Katrina, was music facilitator for Project COMMON BOND serving young adults from around the world who have experienced trauma, and is artistic coordinator for Peace by Piece, a community trauma outreach program in South Boston. He is a certified hospice volunteer for Aseracare Hospice. He was a Pastoral Associate at First Parish in Brookline (Unitarian Universalist) and taught in the Religious Exploration program. He has run over 40 marathons and one ultra, and has a PR of 2:38.

Jon is a professor at Berklee College of Music where he has taught since 1987. Jon’s natural gift for teaching keeps him in high demand in and around Boston and worldwide.

Join us as we navigate the depths of loss, find healing, and embrace the resilience of the human spirit.

**TRIGGER WARNING** This episode covers sensitive subject matter and is not suitable for all listeners. If this topic could be a trigger for you, listen to this episode with a friend, a sibling, a loved one or a parent so you can talk about any emotions that come up for you. The contents of this episode are not intended to replace therapy and should not be taken as such. If you need immediate help, please call the crisis hotline listed below in our resources.

Listen in as we talk about:

[2:45] The 3 siblings he has lost

[5:25] Going through a divorce and processing deep grief and loss at the same time

[8:15] The power of ‘heart play’

[12:50] Understanding your dark place

[13:50] Seeing a therapist and his thoughts on medication

[16:00] Tools to pull yourself out of a dark place

[20:10] Did he take time to withdraw and shut everything out?

[22:55] Navigating the loss of his brother

[24:15] Did the loss from divorce help him handle the other losses in his life?

[27:35] Receiving signs from the other side

[32:45] Tapping into music and playfulness