Keep It Hush Hush with Sarah and Jessica
32 episodes - English - Latest episode: 4 months ago - ★★★★★ - 4 ratingsWe are two mental health advocates from Canada! Sarah has Bipolar Disorder Type 2 and is a musician/artist/dancer, while Jessica has Bipolar Disorder Type 1 and is an HR professional - complete opposite fields and passions! Because we have the same disorder but experience it in wildly different ways, we can connect with a wide variety of folks with lived experience. Collectively we also have BPD traits, OCD, Anxiety, CPSTD, ADHD, and other letters of the alphabet. Join us as we discuss our ongoing mental health journey and interview folks along the way!
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Episodes
S2 | Ep2 Hush Hush No More - Soft Launch into Childhood Trauma & Bipolar
March 15, 2024 21:09 - 55 minutes - 50.6 MBJessica gets ready to speak her truth about her childhood for the first time. Sarah and Jessica both have big feelings about their little sisters. There are tears. *Disclaimer* If you are a father of either of these women, skip this one.
S2 | Ep1 - We're Back! (Part 2 - Jessica uncovers her authentic voice!)
January 10, 2024 04:05 - 46 minutes - 42.9 MBJessica and Sarah reflect on Jessica's 2022 vs. 2023 and the wild changes that happened. Two new diagnosis, a feeling of abandonment, a new home, a dog - anything and everything that could ever happened, happened. From darkest days to full mania. Sarah talks about Pure O (OCD) and why she needs to listen to podcasts and music while living! Something Jessica never knew about! Jessica finds her voice and gets honest about what her intentions are for this podcast and this year while Sarah re...
S2 | Ep1 - We're Back! (Part 1 - Sarah's clumped years)
January 08, 2024 06:41 - 45 minutes - 42.6 MBWhat we thought was going to be a two month break turned out to be a 2 year break from Hush Hush and boy are we ever happy to be back. Sarah and Jessica talk about what they've been up to for the last two years, the ups and downs of 2022/2023 (Sarah can't recall what happened in what year and lacks a concept of time - what is time anyways? While Jessica lists it out like a memoir, cause you know, the woman loves her structure and agendas) This is part one of two as a lot has happened - Jessic...
NEW SHOW: Episode one of Sarah's new solo show Get Well Sooner
February 10, 2022 01:19 - 30 minutes - 42.5 MBWhile Jessica is taking a break, Sarah has started her own show about mental health and spirituality, claims of the paranormal, and yes, even cults. To subscribe, visit the podcast page for Get Well Sooner.
Episode 26: Relationship Series Part 1 (featuring Greg McLeod)
November 21, 2021 22:30 - 1 hour - 63.5 MBSarah and Jessica talk to Greg McLeod: musician, librarian, and Sarah's partner. Jessica turns into a relationship counselor as Sarah and Greg talk about the mental illness symptoms that tore them apart and what rock bottom looked like for Sarah without her support person and romantic partner. Greg explains why he came back, and the three answer listener questions about the tricky task of having a healthy relationship while mentally ill. Check out Greg's music on spotify here. CW: Due to the ...
Episode 25: Mental Illness is NOT spooky (belated Halloween edition)
November 08, 2021 23:26 - 57 minutes - 53.5 MBSarah and Jessica record on Halloween and there are some spooky things on their minds. Come for the hot takes on stigma and Halloween costumes, stay for the review of the Joker by two women who could only bear to watch the first 25 minutes of the movie but have HEARD about how it ends. Even though halloween is over, society treats mental illness and mental illness treatment like it's an entertaining horror movie all year round. Follow us on Instagram @hushushpod! . . . CW: Due to the na...
Episode 24: The month that took us down (unedited edition)
October 05, 2021 18:39 - 50 minutes - 46.3 MBSarah and Jessica struggled with their mental health last month and didn't release any episodes. Sarah can't stop bringing up everything that went wrong for Jessica last month. Jessica is strangely cool with releasing an episode without editing it first. There are three important things in these podcasters lives: Mental health, the podcast, and access to a hot tub. Or maybe it's mental health, access to a hot tub, and the podcast. Either way, mental health comes first. . CW: Due to the nat...
Episode 23: Rebecca and Mental Health In Dance PART 2 (Pole Dance Edition)
August 16, 2021 20:40 - 41 minutes - 38.7 MBSarah and Jessica continue to chat with Rebecca Karpus about mental health and dance, and specifically focus on pole dance for the rest of the conversation. Sarah talks about her insecurities as a dancer and an instructor. Rebecca discusses the great thing about tiny pole outfits (it's not what you think). Jessica wants to feel sexy and everyone encourages her to do so. CW: Due to the nature of our subject matter, topics like suicide, mental illness symptoms, self-harm, and trauma may come...
Epsiode 22: Rebecca and Mental Health in Dance PART 1 (ballet edition)
August 07, 2021 15:00 - 49 minutes - 45.8 MBSarah and Jessica chat with Rebecca Karpus about mental health in the dance world. Isn't dancing supposed to be good for you? What could possibly go wrong? Or maybe the better question is, what could we possibly change? Both Sarah and Rebecca have a love for dance, and Rebecca approaches this subject with a wealth of knowledge and understanding. Part one features Rebecca discussing mental health and ballet/contemporary dance and helps us to better understand why dance can both be amazing and...
Episode 21 - Self soothing with Sarah and Jessica ( the upside down edition)
July 23, 2021 20:10 - 1 hour - 56.6 MBSarah and Jessica share things that they do to self-soothe when things get rough. Sarah is strangely calmed by conspiracy theories. Jessica thinks there are only 4 good movies in the world. Digressions include Lil John songs, Princess Anastasia as a historical figure, and McDonald's coffee. CW: Due to the nature of our subject matter, topics like suicide, mental illness symptoms, self-harm, and trauma may come up. For privacy and triggering reasons, we do not talk about these topics in gra...
Episode 20: Autism with Sarah/Rowan (lost episode edition)
July 08, 2021 02:29 - 1 hour - 111 MB(CW: Brief mention of suicide, offensive language used to quote bullies) Sarah and Jessica talk to autism activist/filmmaker @brain_vessel for the second time because the recording of the first time has disappeared into the ether. Sarah Duncan (aka Rowan Duncan) discusses how they weren't diagnosed until recently due to most autism research being done on little white boys. A surprise film review has been expertly inserted into the episode (it's not an awkward transition at all). To learn mor...
Episode 19: Mentally ill and employed (extra tired edition)
June 22, 2021 20:51 - 57 minutes - 79.6 MBSarah and Jessica both got jobs and are not quite sure how to balance everything. Jessica talks work accommodations and how the pandemic has given her access to a more forgiving work environment. Sarah tells her students that insisting they show up on exactly on time is ableism. Diversions include bachelorette parties, live concerts, and some sleepy nonsense. CW: Due to the nature of our subject matter, topics like suicide, mental illness symptoms, self-harm, and trauma may come up. For pr...
Episode 18: The Fuck It Diet & Anti-Diet Culture (Double Big Mac Edition)
June 03, 2021 22:05 - 1 hour - 96.1 MB(CW: binge eating disorder, binge drinking) Sarah and Jessica discuss Sarah's favourite book The Fuck It Diet by Caroline Dooner. Sarah talks about being "addicted" to sugar, and how this book completely changed her life and her diagnosed binge eating disorder. Jessica realizes that the Fuck It Diet is very similar to her case manager's attitude towards alcohol, and discusses her history of eating at McDonalds. Some of the Instagram accounts Sarah mentions are @Your.Latina.Nutritionist, @die...
Episode 17: the other Jess on body image, food, and race (secret DBT edition)
May 20, 2021 21:35 - 1 hour - 112 MBSarah and Jessica check in with @j.e.s.s.s to discuss her experience growing up mixed race and learning to take ownership of her body. Sarah and Jessica insert DBT (dialectical behavioral therapy) into everything. CW: Due to the nature of our subject matter, topics like suicide, mental illness symptoms, self-harm, and trauma may come up. For privacy and triggering reasons, we do not talk about these topics in graphic detail. If you are struggling with thoughts of suicide or urges to self-h...
Episode 16: Bipolar Rapid Cycle vs BPD mood changes (time travel edition)
April 30, 2021 20:17 - 1 hour - 84.6 MBSarah and Jessica listen to themselves playing I'm Not Really Strangers in the past and have some new things to add to the conversation. Jessica has a new diagnosis that no one told her about. Sarah also had that diagnosis and has a LOT to say about it. Can two people have different personalities but have the same personality disorder? (The answer is yes. Absolutely.) CW: Due to the nature of our subject matter, topics like suicide, mental illness symptoms, self-harm, and trauma may come up...
Episode 15: Bipolar Bicostal share their stories (twins edition)
April 14, 2021 20:30 - 1 hour - 130 MB(Attention: The interview starts at 13 minutes if you want to skip straight to it! Our intro is a bit longer today because we made changes to our mood scale due to new information from Jessica's doctor. ) This week, Sarah and Jessica talk to Anna and Maria, the twin sisters behind the podcast Bipolar Bicostal. Anna and Maria share their unique bipolar stories and how it affected their lives and their extremely close relationship. Sarah is reassured that her under-employed existence has value...
Episode 14: Sarah and Jessica play "We're Not Really Strangers"
April 01, 2021 21:01 - 41 minutes - 57.6 MBSarah and Jessica play the card game "We're Not Really Strangers" in which they have to ask each other increasingly personal questions. Topics range from self-doubt to favourite cereals. . CW: Due to the nature of our subject matter, topics like suicide, mental illness symptoms, self-harm, and trauma may come up. For privacy and triggering reasons, we do not talk about these topics in graphic detail. If you are struggling with thoughts of suicide or urges to self-harm, please call your l...
Episode 13: The Ugly Side of the Beauty Industry
March 17, 2021 18:33 - 1 hour - 91.8 MBCW: Bulimia, Disordered Eating Sarah and Jessica sit down with their mutual friend Jena Jacquot, who is the reason why they met in the first place! Jena and Jessica talk about their time working at toxic hair and makeup salons, and Jena and Sarah talk about working in industries where mental illnesses come with the job and looks matter more than anything else. The three also discuss gymnastics, glitter, and how bipolar disorder can mess with your hair. (The music video that Jena scaled a ...
Episode 12: Unedited with Sarah and Jessica
March 01, 2021 22:03 - 56 minutes - 77.1 MBSarah and Jessica talk about what's really on their minds when it comes to mental health, the meaning of life, and all that good stuff. Jessica gets angry at her bipolar. Sarah rants about ableism and why it's okay to be late. This is just an unedited, unplanned, and super open discussion. Theme song: Crybaby by Sarah Jickling and her Good Bad Luck CW: Due to the nature of our subject matter, topics like suicide, mental illness symptoms, self-harm, and trauma may come up. For privacy and ...
Episode 12: Real Talk with Sarah and Jessica
March 01, 2021 22:03 - 56 minutes - 77.1 MBSarah and Jessica talk about what's really on their minds when it comes to mental health, the meaning of life, and all that good stuff. Jessica gets angry at her bipolar. Sarah rants about ableism and why it's okay to be late. This is just an unedited, unplanned, and super open discussion. Theme song: Crybaby by Sarah Jickling and her Good Bad Luck CW: Due to the nature of our subject matter, topics like suicide, mental illness symptoms, self-harm, and trauma may come up. For privacy and ...
Episode 11: Self care and break ups (backwards terminator edition)
February 14, 2021 18:59 - 1 hour - 96.5 MB(CW: death of parents at a young age) Sarah and Jessica talk to Anita Lee about the softening of her "tough as nails" mindset, getting out of a toxic relationship, and putting all her energy into her relationship with herself. CW: Due to the nature of our subject matter, topics like suicide, mental illness symptoms, self-harm, and trauma may come up. For privacy and triggering reasons, we do not talk about these topics in graphic detail. If you are struggling with thoughts of suicide or ur...
Episode 10: To manifest or not to manifest? (victim blaming edition)
February 01, 2021 20:18 - 44 minutes - 61.2 MBSarah and Jessica talk about the idea of manifesting your dreams, and how it's pretty unhelpful, especially for those of us with bipolar disorder. Jessica has always interpreted manifesting as "fake it 'til you make it," to varying results. Sarah used to believe in the law of attraction, and she explains how it's actually victim-blaming in disguise. Neither of them are really on board for manifesting. CW: Due to the nature of our subject matter, topics like suicide, mental illness symptoms...
Episode 9: Amanda and the 'hush hush' eating disorder
January 15, 2021 16:00 - 1 hour - 85 MBOur guest Amanda tells her story and advocates for a future where our worth isn't tied to the sizes and shapes of our bodies. Amanda and Sarah share the diagnosis of Binge Eating Disorder, but their experiences are very different. Jessica asks how to approach a friend or a loved one who may have an eating disorder and need help. CW: Due to the nature of our subject matter, topics like suicide, mental illness symptoms, self-harm, and trauma may come up. For privacy and triggering reasons...
Episode 8: New year, same you!
January 01, 2021 16:00 - 46 minutes - 63.3 MBSarah and Jessica talk about how new year's resolutions are a recipe for disappointment and discuss different ways to avoid falling into the self-improvement trap. Sarah chooses her special, super-serious word of the year for 2021. Jessica decides what her core values are in like three seconds. CW: Due to the nature of our subject matter, topics like suicide, mental illness symptoms, self-harm, and trauma may come up. For privacy and triggering reasons, we do not talk about these topics ...
Episode 7: Sydney, Uni, and ADHD
December 15, 2020 18:54 - 1 hour - 84.1 MBSydney Thorne tells Sarah and Jessica about her experience of being in denial for years until she finally got diagnosed with ADHD. All three of them go off about their terrible experiences with post-secondary education. Sydney gets into the details of what ADHD really is, and how being diagnosed has changed her life. Here are some of the ADHD accounts that helped Sydney: https://twitter.com/danidonovan?s=21 https://twitter.com/howtoadhd?s=21 https://twitter.com/dustychipura?s=21 https:/...
Episode 6: Winter Blues (seasonal affective disorder edition)
December 01, 2020 18:56 - 37 minutes - 51.1 MBSarah talks about how she has combatted SAD in the past, and why it particularly affects people with bipolar disorder. Jessica discusses all things cozy, and reveals her Jersey Shore inspired past. Both girls mix up serotonin, adrenaline, and dopamine because they are NOT DOCTORS! Learn a little more about SAD here if you think you might suffer from this. Follow Allison Bickerstaff (the insta girl jessica mentions) for cozy inspo here. . . . . CW: Due to the nature of our subject matt...
Episode 5: Let's talk about death, baby! (Super Hush-Hush Edition)
November 19, 2020 01:24 - 1 hour - 95.7 MBCW: personal accounts of suicide attempts, near-death experiences, death anxiety, grief, differing religious beliefs, elder neglect Jessica and Sarah discuss their most hush-hush topic yet with Bridget Ganger, who is active in the death positivity movement and has a lot of personal experience with grief. In spite of the dark subject matter, this episode is filled with laughter and interesting new ways of looking at the things we constantly push to the back of our minds. Jessica gets grosse...
Episode 4: Is Your Hobby Good For Your Mental Health?
November 01, 2020 14:00 - 45 minutes - 63.2 MBSarah talks about how pole dancing and aerial arts have improved her mental health and changed her life. Jessica discovers that she actually had a hobby THE WHOLE TIME! YOUR hobby is valid, and YOUR hobby is valid! All of our hobbies are valid! CW: Due to the nature of our subject matter, topics like suicide, mental illness symptoms, self-harm, and trauma may come up. For privacy and triggering reasons, we do not talk about these topics in graphic detail. If you are struggling with thoug...
Episode 3: The other Jess and our MLM mess
October 15, 2020 13:00 - 1 hour - 98.8 MB@j.e.s.s, the other Jess, joins us for this episode as we discuss predatory health care, multilevel marketing wellness scams, and what to expect when you are searching for mental health treatments. Jessica talks about her experience with crystals and the strange places she put them. Sarah and Jess are very passionate about debunking scam treatments and can't stop talking about it, which is why this episode is so long! Follow Jess on Instagram For more information about MLMs: John Oliver...
Episode 2: Things We Wish People Knew About Our Illness
October 01, 2020 13:00 - 41 minutes - 56.6 MBThe girls talk about the everyday realities of living with Bipolar Disorder. Jessica opens up about something big. Sarah makes an analogy that almost works. Sort of. CW: Due to the nature of our subject matter, topics like suicide, mental illness symptoms, self-harm, and trauma may come up. For privacy and triggering reasons, we do not talk about these topics in graphic detail. If you are struggling with thoughts of suicide or urges to self-harm, please call your local crisis line. Follow...
Episode 1: Sarah and Jessica explain themselves
October 01, 2020 13:00 - 35 minutes - 48.9 MBSarah and Jessica talk about their journeys with bipolar disorder and what they want to accomplish with this podcast. Jessica shares stuff for the first time! Sarah shares stuff that she has shared before, but it's still fun! CW: Due to the nature of our subject matter, topics like suicide, mental illness symptoms, self-harm, and trauma may come up. For privacy and triggering reasons, we do not talk about these topics in graphic detail. If you are struggling with thoughts of suicide or urg...
Start here! Episode 1: Sarah and Jessica explain themselves
October 01, 2020 13:00 - 35 minutes - 48.9 MBSarah and Jessica talk about their journeys with bipolar disorder and what they want to accomplish with this podcast. Jessica shares stuff for the first time! Sarah shares stuff that she has shared before, but it's still fun! CW: Due to the nature of our subject matter, topics like suicide, mental illness symptoms, self-harm, and trauma may come up. For privacy and triggering reasons, we do not talk about these topics in graphic detail. If you are struggling with thoughts of suicide or urg...