Bible Beaters – Canada Comedy
348 episodes - English - Latest episode: 5 months ago - ★★★★ - 32 ratingsCanada's Comedy Podcast Network
Homepage Apple Podcasts Google Podcasts Overcast Castro Pocket Casts RSS feed
Episodes
Live From Sweden
August 16, 2021 01:59 - 1 hour - 88.7 MBEp192 The post Live From Sweden appeared first on Canada Comedy.
I Thought This Was War
August 08, 2021 19:11 - 55 minutes - 75.7 MBEp191 The post I Thought This Was War appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Prophecy Inception
August 01, 2021 18:15 - 1 hour - 108 MBEp190 The post Prophecy Inception appeared first on Canada Comedy.
A Convenient Prophecy
July 25, 2021 13:00 - 1 hour - 121 MBEp189 The post A Convenient Prophecy appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Can I Pay You in Dove Shit?
July 18, 2021 13:00 - 1 hour - 102 MBEp188 The post Can I Pay You in Dove Shit? appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Canadian Mayhem
July 12, 2021 20:50 - 56 minutes - 77.5 MBEp187 It’s the hottest Canada on record and people are burning down churches. Kyle is in love. In bible times there is a horrible forestry accident. An axe head flies of off the handle and sinks the bottom of the river and to top it all off, the axe was borrowed! Elisha gets trapped in... The post Canadian Mayhem appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Follow Me or Else
July 04, 2021 17:28 - 1 hour - 119 MBEp186 It’s the beginning of the the hottest week in Canada’s history. Kyle’s new neighbors have called the cops on his parties. After in enjoying the presence of the Shummanite woman Elisha meanders over to Gilgal and on the way him and his buddies make a stew. Somebody throws some poison in the pot by... The post Follow Me or Else appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Tell Her Thanks
June 27, 2021 18:05 - 1 hour - 106 MBEp185 The post Tell Her Thanks appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Lost In The Dessert Again
June 20, 2021 21:29 - 1 hour - 114 MBEp184 The post Lost In The Dessert Again appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Two Bears, Twice the Power
June 13, 2021 18:12 - 1 hour - 113 MBEp183 The post Two Bears, Twice the Power appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Chariots of Fire
June 06, 2021 17:58 - 1 hour - 103 MBEp182 (2 Kings 2) We get right into it on this podcast. We have to hold reserve host Simeon up before the lord in healing prayer as he has sustained a horrific scootering accident. Kyle is sliding into married women’s DM’s. In bible times the hairy man from the dessert has picked up an adoring... The post Chariots of Fire appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Heaven Gender
May 30, 2021 11:00 - 1 hour - 104 MBEp179 (2 Kings 1) Kyle has annoying neighbors. Caleb has a JW neighbor. We get talking about genders in heaven and their complicated relationship. This leads into discussions about consciousness and cancer. The king of Israel had a few too many and falls off his balcony. Whilst he recovers he sends messengers to Baal Zebub... The post Heaven Gender appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Well Fuck
May 23, 2021 11:00 - 58 minutes - 79.7 MBEp178 (1 Kings 22) It finally happened. We lost half a recorded episode and this is our best attempt at recreation. Caleb has a righteous stalker heaven bent on silencing him on facebook. We talk about the ideal way to get martyred and how shitty it would be to be a corporate prophet. Asa (the... The post Well Fuck appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Pastafarian
May 16, 2021 16:39 - 1 hour - 117 MBEp177 The post Pastafarian appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Don’t Kink Shame God (1 Kings 21)
May 09, 2021 17:04 - 1 hour - 140 MBEp176 (1 Kings 21) Blessings to the patrons! Kyle shares his feelings for once. Ahab, the worst king in 7 generations, whom god helped win a war against 32 kings, wants to buy Naboths vineyard. Naboth will not sell his vineyard. Ahab throws a temper tantrum and stop eating until his bea Jezebel takes matters... The post Don’t Kink Shame God (1 Kings 21) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Don’t Kink Shame God
May 09, 2021 17:04 - 1 hour - 140 MBThe post Don’t Kink Shame God appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Drunk and Lost
May 02, 2021 23:41 - 1 hour - 129 MBEp176 The post Drunk and Lost appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Bluffing and Winning
April 25, 2021 15:25 - 1 hour - 127 MBEp175 The post Bluffing and Winning appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Pro Choice
April 18, 2021 13:00 - 1 hour - 89.8 MBEp174 The post Pro Choice appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Toddlers On The Sidewalk
April 11, 2021 13:00 - 1 hour - 93.4 MBEp173 The post Toddlers On The Sidewalk appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Philosophers Stoned
April 04, 2021 13:00 - 1 hour - 107 MBWe’re doing something different this week. The post Philosophers Stoned appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Muhammed Toast (1 kings 18)
March 28, 2021 13:00 - 1 hour - 88.1 MBEp172 (1 kings 18) Caleb has a run in with a crazy person. At Bethel church in California and they hold 6 days of resurrection services before having a funeral. Are miracles even possible? Next we have absolute banger of story. Elijah returns from the desert to tell the king to go fuck himself in... The post Muhammed Toast (1 kings 18) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Make Me A Sandwich
March 21, 2021 20:23 - 1 hour - 116 MBEp171 The post Make Me A Sandwich appeared first on Canada Comedy.
It’s My Party
March 15, 2021 00:36 - 1 hour - 108 MBEp171 The post It’s My Party appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Bible Beaters Goes Heavy Metal (1 Kings 16)
March 07, 2021 14:00 - 1 hour - 88.6 MBEp170 (1 Kings 16) Today we react to 2 thousand years of oppression. Some genius put gods voice to guitar and we had to sit through it. In bible times we had to sit through 3 non hall of famers to get to Elijah the greatest prayer of ALL time. You wouldn’t believe how lame... The post Bible Beaters Goes Heavy Metal (1 Kings 16) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Harbor Freight J’s (1 Kings 15 -16)
February 28, 2021 14:00 - 1 hour - 114 MBEp169 (1 Kings 15 -16) Me and my homies talk about revisiting old movies that you thought were good but are actually just a premake of a newer movie with the same characters and the drug trips are fake af. The Jewish civil war continues even after the death of King Jeroboam. Caleb makes a... The post Harbor Freight J’s (1 Kings 15 -16) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Thinking Cool
February 23, 2021 18:14 - 2 hours - 170 MBEp62 Homeless Comedian Taz McNally joins the boys. Chad finds a girl that weirds HIM out. He’s got two dates lined up, we’ll see what happens. The post Thinking Cool appeared first on Canada Comedy.
I Thought We Were Friends (1 Kings 15)
February 21, 2021 18:38 - 1 hour - 101 MBEp168 (1 Kings 15) It’s Caleb’s birthday so everyone gets handjob because we are close buddies. We get into the reign of Asa no not the pornstar. Asa has a civil war with the Jeroboam in the north. Unfortunately all the details are recorded in another book which we do not have access to. This... The post I Thought We Were Friends (1 Kings 15) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
If You Can Read This… (1 Kings 14)
February 14, 2021 14:00 - 1 hour - 102 MBEp16 (1 Kings 14) Happy Valentines day dipshits. We reinvestigate the story of Steve and Larry the lying prophet and how this relates to biblical interpretation. So king Jeroboam’s kid gets sick. The king tells his wife to don a disguise and go visit a blind prophet. Why she needs a disguise for blind man... The post If You Can Read This… (1 Kings 14) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Here Comes The Bride (1 Kings 13)
February 07, 2021 14:00 - 49 minutes - 67.6 MBEp166 (1 Kings 13) Caleb has had his balls removed. In Bible times, king Jeroboam is worshipping cows will nilly so god sends a man from Judah to put a stop to it. The man uses his god powers to wither the king’s hand and then restore it. The king tries to repay the jesus... The post Here Comes The Bride (1 Kings 13) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Jeroboam Rehoboam
January 31, 2021 14:00 - 1 hour - 115 MBEp165 (1 Kings 12) Kyle gets beat down worse than Connor Macgregor. Solomon has died and the Kingdom is passed to his son Rehoboam. His first order of business is to tell all his dad’s advisors to go fuck themselves and hire his buddies. Next, he tells his subjects that the beatings will continue until... The post Jeroboam Rehoboam appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Justice Boner (1 Kings 11)
January 24, 2021 19:54 - 1 hour - 106 MBEp 164 (1 Kings 11) Much like christ, the Lord of Hosts has been forsaken by his father. The King of Tardness finds this hilarious and bullies him. 3000 years ago Solomon has finished notching his bed post for the literal thousandth time. Dem asses makes Solomon worship the wrong god(s) by accident and this... The post Justice Boner (1 Kings 11) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Solomon’s Hoes(1 Kings 11)
January 17, 2021 14:00 - 58 minutes - 80.1 MBEP163 (1 Kings 11) The interupter gets ripped off on Facebook marketplace. This week the bible reads more like a magazine listing all of the hookups of king Solomon. Solomon, the wisest man to have ever lived past, present, or future, takes for himself 700 royal wives. If that were not enough he picked up... The post Solomon’s Hoes(1 Kings 11) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Solomon’s Hoes (1 Kings 11)
January 17, 2021 14:00 - 58 minutes - 80.1 MBEP163 (1 Kings 11) The interupter gets ripped off on Facebook marketplace. This week the bible reads more like a magazine listing all of the hookups of king Solomon. Solomon, the wisest man to have ever lived past, present, or future, takes for himself 700 royal wives. If that were not enough he picked up... The post Solomon’s Hoes (1 Kings 11) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Smoke Sheba Sheba (1 Kings 10)
January 10, 2021 20:05 - 1 hour - 90.3 MBEP162 (1 Kings 10) Caleb delves into his dark past as a crackhead. The bible turns into a reality show. The Queen of Sheba visits Solomon to validate the claims of his wealth and wisdom. Solomon of course lives up to the hype as the smartest man that ever lived. Next, it turns into an... The post Smoke Sheba Sheba (1 Kings 10) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Anti-Semantic-ism (1 Kings 9)
January 04, 2021 03:27 - 1 hour - 106 MBEP161 (1 Kings 9) Happy New Year Dipshits! The year of our lord 2020 is over and it ended with a spectacular shit show. The boys head up to the woods for a bonfire and somebody gets real stuck. In the distant, non existent past the lord answers King Solomons prayers. He says some nice... The post Anti-Semantic-ism (1 Kings 9) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Anti-Semantic-ism
January 04, 2021 03:27 - 1 hour - 106 MBEP161 Happy New Year Dipshits! The year of our lord 2020 is over and it ended with a spectacular shit show. The boys head up to the woods for a bonfire and somebody gets real stuck. In the distant, non existent past the lord answers King Solomons prayers. He says some nice things about the... The post Anti-Semantic-ism appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Cheeseburgers in the Snow (1 Kings 8)
December 27, 2020 19:58 - 1 hour - 107 MBEP160 (1 Kings 8) Merry Christmas dildos! Its a covid Christmas nightmare. The Interrupters family comes to town with hives of bees. We’re not kidding. The Lord of Hosts tries Zoom Caroling. 4000 years ago Solomon dedicated the temple to the lord, humble bragging the entire time. We discuss the preposterous number of animals sacrificed.... The post Cheeseburgers in the Snow (1 Kings 8) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Cheeseburgers in the Snow (1 Kings 7)
December 27, 2020 19:58 - 1 hour - 107 MBEP160 (1 Kings 7) Merry Christmas dildos! Its a covid Christmas nightmare. The Interrupters family comes to town with hives of bees. We’re not kidding. The Lord of Hosts tries Zoom Caroling. 4000 years ago Solomon dedicated the temple to the lord, humble bragging the entire time. We discuss the preposterous number of animals sacrificed.... The post Cheeseburgers in the Snow (1 Kings 7) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Reason Must Bow (1 Kings 8)
December 20, 2020 19:54 - 1 hour - 91.5 MBEp159 (1 Kings 8) King Solomon’s Dedication This week the humble lord god almighty who was, and is, and is, to come, demands King Solomon and the entire assembly of Israel that had gathered about him were before the ark, sacrificing so many sheep and cattle that they could not be recorded or counted. And... The post Reason Must Bow (1 Kings 8) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Reason Must Bow (1 Kings 7)
December 20, 2020 14:00 - 1 hour - 91.5 MBEp159 (1 Kings 7) King Solomon’s Dedication This week the humble lord god almighty who was, and is, and is, to come, demands King Solomon and the entire assembly of Israel that had gathered about him were before the ark, sacrificing so many sheep and cattle that they could not be recorded or counted. And […] The post Reason Must Bow (1 Kings 7) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Dream Temple Makeover (1 Kings 7)
December 13, 2020 19:41 - 56 minutes - 78.1 MBEP158 (1 Kings 7) The Interrupter returns from a ski trip and Covid regulations are in full effect. Solomon is decorating god’s house and he thinks god will LOVE it. The temple has an above ground pool, sticks everywhere, wreath’s n shit, and some bronze basins. He get sidetracked talking about religious hairstyles and who... The post Dream Temple Makeover (1 Kings 7) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Dream Temple Makeover (1 Kings 8)
December 13, 2020 14:00 - 56 minutes - 78.1 MBEP158 (1 Kings 8) The Interrupter returns from a ski trip and Covid regulations are in full effect. Solomon is decorating god’s house and he thinks god will LOVE it. The temple has an above ground pool, sticks everywhere, wreath’s n shit, and some bronze basins. He get sidetracked talking about religious hairstyles and who […] The post Dream Temple Makeover (1 Kings 8) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Pillar Measuring Contest (1 Kings 7)
December 06, 2020 19:36 - 1 hour - 89.7 MBEP157 (1 Kings 7) Hurricane Wesley has hit Kelowna and Caleb is stressed. Kyle is jovial. Everybody, including the closet dwelling weirdo Uncle Gus, tells about the the time when they were caught polishing their idols. In bible times, king Solomon begins his next project: The Palace. Many building materials and dimensions are relayed as... The post Pillar Measuring Contest (1 Kings 7) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Getting Caleb With High
November 29, 2020 14:00 - 1 hour - 89.2 MBEP156 The post Getting Caleb With High appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Getting Caleb With High (1 Kings 5)
November 29, 2020 14:00 - 1 hour - 89.2 MBEP156 (1 Kings 5) Caleb believes he can get away with coming in to work stoned. Kyle’s gym has a weird smell. We talk about going to church high. Solomon begins what will become his lives work. He starts by talking to his buddies in Lebanon to get some cedar and pine trees. We discuss... The post Getting Caleb With High (1 Kings 5) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Getting Caleb With High (1 Kings 5-6)
November 29, 2020 14:00 - 1 hour - 89.2 MBEP156 (1 Kings 5) Caleb believes he can get away with coming in to work stoned. Kyle’s gym has a weird smell. We talk about going to church high. Solomon begins what will become his lives work. He starts by talking to his buddies in Lebanon to get some cedar and pine trees. We discuss […] The post Getting Caleb With High (1 Kings 5-6) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Holy Reparations
November 22, 2020 14:00 - 1 hour - 96.1 MBEP155 This week Caleb’s faith wavers and Kyle admonishes him like Jesus did to Satan. In the midst of pages of hard to pronounce names we stumble into a theological debate over god’s plan and human intervention. We talk about the tax system of ancient Israel and how much king Solomon ate in a day. […] The post Holy Reparations appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Holy Reparations (1 Kings 4)
November 22, 2020 14:00 - 1 hour - 96.1 MBEP155 (1 Kings 4) This week Caleb’s faith wavers and Kyle admonishes him like Jesus did to Satan. In the midst of pages of hard to pronounce names we stumble into a theological debate over god’s plan and human intervention. We talk about the tax system of ancient Israel and how much king Solomon ate... The post Holy Reparations (1 Kings 4) appeared first on Canada Comedy.
Switcharoo (1 Kings 3)
November 15, 2020 14:00 - 1 hour - 112 MBEP154 (1 Kings 3) 2020 is taking is toll on the gang and Kyle is going bald about it. We half heartedly discuss revolution. In the bible Solomon has consolidated his position as king by eliminating his rivals and settling old scores. Solomon has a dream in which god visits him and says “I’ll give... The post Switcharoo (1 Kings 3) appeared first on Canada Comedy.