How I Reparented Myself Through Chronic Feelings of Emptiness & Fear of Dying

I was scared to post this episode. My inner critic was telling me if I didn't prepare plenty of research and uphold my usual standards of perfection, my listeners would immediately unfollow the podcast. I decided to question that inner voice this time. On this episode, I get candid about my fear of dying and chronic feelings of emptiness, a core feature of borderline personality disorder (BPD) and complex trauma (cPTSD.)

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Below are some concepts discussed in this episode:

■ My personal experience of chronic feelings of emptiness and numbness throughout my struggle with BPD and complex trauma (CPTSD)

■ Identifying the first time I ever felt empty and numb as a child

■ Fear of dying / fear of the concept of "forever"

■ How big feelings can paralyze us as children and trap us in what feels like a permanently frozen state if we don't have caregivers who can support us through this process (often, our parents never had anyone to help them move through their OWN big feelings)

■ The negative impact of expecting a constant state of happiness as a measuring stick for successful recovery

■ Making the decision to switch my expectation of happiness for a state of contented, grounded, wise mind

■ Questioning my inner critic and re-parenting my inner child self

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