Unlimited
180 episodes - English - Latest episode: 12 days ago - ★★★★★ - 11 ratingsThe Unlimited Podcast is a podcast for badass women who are on a journey to release learned limitations and live a more present, joyful, and intentional life. It's about reaching for the stars while keeping your feet on the ground. Your Host, Valerie Friedlander is an ICF certified coach, sociologist, business owner, and mom. You can find out more at www.valeriefriedlander.com and follow her on Instagram @unlimitedcoachval
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Episodes
Learning and Living Outside the Box with Tiana Kubik
May 26, 2021 07:00 - 41 minutes - 28.8 MBLearning and living outside the box makes the ability to think outside the box SO much more natural. Yet, while thinking outside the box is considered an asset in entrepreneurship and business, it’s isn’t very supported when it comes to education or how we do life. Our society gets so caught up in measuring sticks like standardized test scores and house sizes to determine whether someone is “doing well” in school and life. How often do you stop to think “How well is this really working for m...
Girl, Learn to Apologize
May 19, 2021 07:00 - 33 minutes - 22.9 MBIf you don’t learn how to apologize, you will likely end up repeating the harm that led to the need for an apology in the first place. We’ve seen this recently with a number of highly visible people. This isn’t surprising since, like so most aspects of relating to others in a healthy way, apologies aren’t something we’re taught how to do. However, I do find the blundering of the apology particularly ironic with those in the self-help space because the root of a meaningful apology is in perso...
#29 Girl, Learn to Apologize
May 19, 2021 07:00 - 33 minutes - 22.8 MBIf you don’t learn how to apologize, you will likely end up repeating the harm that led to the need for an apology in the first place. We’ve seen this recently with a number of highly visible people. This isn’t surprising since, like so most aspects of relating to others in a healthy way, apologies aren’t something we’re taught how to do. However, I do find the blundering of the apology particularly ironic with those in the self-help space because the root of a meaningful apology is in perso...
Stop Being Nice and Start Being Resilient
May 12, 2021 07:00 - 33 minutes - 23 MBWe need to stop being nice and start being resilient. Hurt feelings happen but we've been trained to avoid them, rather than how to process and deal with them in a productive way. This leads to codependent behaviors on an individual level and feeds problematic power dynamics on a societal level. This is emphasized in corporate culture etiquette and unconscious expectations on women to manage other people's (especially men's) emotional comfort. These expectations are often deeply internalized...
#28 Stop Being Nice and Start Being Resilient
May 12, 2021 07:00 - 33 minutes - 23 MBWe need to stop being nice and start being resilient. Hurt feelings happen but we've been trained to avoid them, rather than how to process and deal with them in a productive way. This leads to codependent behaviors on an individual level and feeds problematic power dynamics on a societal level. This is emphasized in corporate culture etiquette and unconscious expectations on women to manage other people's (especially men's) emotional comfort. These expectations are often deeply internalized...
Supporting Your Relationship With YOU
May 05, 2021 07:00 - 38 minutes - 26.5 MBThe number one relationship in your life is the one you have with yourself. It influences how you experience and engage every other relationship be it with people, situations, or resources. Interestingly though, your relationship with yourself is also built by all your other relationships. Most of the dynamics of your self-relationship happen in the background of your mind, unconsciously influencing what you notice around you, how you feel about what you notice, and how you then show up to t...
#27 Supporting Your Relationship With YOU
May 05, 2021 07:00 - 38 minutes - 26.5 MBThe number one relationship in your life is the one you have with yourself. It influences how you experience and engage every other relationship be it with people, situations, or resources. Interestingly though, your relationship with yourself is also built by all your other relationships. Most of the dynamics of your self-relationship happen in the background of your mind, unconsciously influencing what you notice around you, how you feel about what you notice, and how you then show up to t...
#26 Healing from Toxic Money Stories [coaching]
April 28, 2021 06:00 - 46 minutes - 32.3 MBMoney stories. Many of the ones our society is swimming in are toxic. In order to change those stories and create healthier structures, we need to consciously engage them as individuals. I have many clients who are working to step out of lack mentality and create a greater sense of abundance in their life. They come from a variety of backgrounds and make anywhere from $0 staring out to 6 figures. The woman I’m coaching in this episode is a current client. She signed up for this session becau...
Healing from Toxic Money Stories [coaching]
April 28, 2021 06:00 - 46 minutes - 32.3 MBMoney stories. Many of the ones our society is swimming in are toxic. In order to change those stories and create healthier structures, we need to consciously engage them as individuals. I have many clients who are working to step out of lack mentality and create a greater sense of abundance in their life. They come from a variety of backgrounds and make anywhere from $0 staring out to 6 figures. The woman I’m coaching in this episode is a current client. She signed up for this session becau...
Sustainable & Ethical Entrepreneurship with Erika Tebbens
April 21, 2021 07:00 - 51 minutes - 35.5 MBGrowing up we learn to follow the rules, hustle to create success, if we make enough money we'll be happy and valuable... Most of these stories are rooted in toxic systems that reinforce harmful ways of engaging money and people. This doesn’t make money bad. But it does mean that we need an additional level of mindfulness to engage running a business that is sustainable and ethical in practice as well as product. It takes cutting out the noise from all the “right way” gurus and following a ...
#25 Sustainable & Ethical Entrepreneurship
April 21, 2021 07:00 - 51 minutes - 35.4 MBGrowing up we learn to follow the rules, hustle to create success, if we make enough money we'll be happy and valuable... Most of these stories are rooted in toxic systems that reinforce harmful ways of engaging money and people. This doesn’t make money bad. But it does mean that we need an additional level of mindfulness to engage running a business that is sustainable and ethical in practice as well as product. It takes cutting out the noise from all the “right way” gurus and following a ...
#25 Sustainable & Ethical Entrepreneurship with Erika Tebbens
April 21, 2021 07:00 - 51 minutes - 35.4 MBGrowing up we learn to follow the rules, hustle to create success, if we make enough money we'll be happy and valuable... Most of these stories are rooted in toxic systems that reinforce harmful ways of engaging money and people. This doesn’t make money bad. But it does mean that we need an additional level of mindfulness to engage running a business that is sustainable and ethical in practice as well as product. It takes cutting out the noise from all the “right way” gurus and following a ...
Ditch the Shame & Support Your Goals with Ornella Yovo
April 14, 2021 07:00 - 39 minutes - 27 MBMoney is a topic we are obsessed with in this society. It’s incredibly sensitive, so we rarely talk about it directly. Yet we’re constantly surrounded by conversations related to it. Part of the reason is that there is a great deal of shame surrounding it – mostly in not having it, though for some there’s shame in having it that leads them to not have it. All this emotional weight and avoidance creates a very disempowering dynamic. In order to reclaim this tool to build sustainable lives an...
#24 Ditch the Shame & Support Your Goals
April 14, 2021 07:00 - 39 minutes - 27 MBMoney is a topic we are obsessed with in this society. It’s incredibly sensitive, so we rarely talk about it directly. Yet we’re constantly surrounded by conversations related to it. Part of the reason is that there is a great deal of shame surrounding it – mostly in not having it, though for some there’s shame in having it that leads them to not have it. All this emotional weight and avoidance creates a very disempowering dynamic. In order to reclaim this tool to build sustainable lives an...
#24 Ditch the Shame & Support Your Goals with Ornella Yovo
April 14, 2021 07:00 - 39 minutes - 27 MBMoney is a topic we are obsessed with in this society. It’s incredibly sensitive, so we rarely talk about it directly. Yet we’re constantly surrounded by conversations related to it. Part of the reason is that there is a great deal of shame surrounding it – mostly in not having it, though for some there’s shame in having it that leads them to not have it. All this emotional weight and avoidance creates a very disempowering dynamic. In order to reclaim this tool to build sustainable lives an...
How to Plan for the Future AND Enjoy the Present
April 07, 2021 07:00 - 40 minutes - 28.2 MBWe're taught from a young age to look toward the future. That life really begins once something in the future happens, such as once you become the person you're going to be when you grow up. The problem is that this sets us up in a pattern of chasing, not having. Many clients come to me saying they have big dreams and want to make an impact in the world but they don't want to sacrifice the present moment. They believe both is possible but don't know HOW. It starts with relearning how to visi...
#23 How to Plan for the Future AND Enjoy the Present
April 07, 2021 07:00 - 40 minutes - 28.2 MBWe're taught from a young age to look toward the future. That life really begins once something in the future happens, such as once you become the person you're going to be when you grow up. The problem is that this sets us up in a pattern of chasing, not having. Many clients come to me saying they have big dreams and want to make an impact in the world but they don't want to sacrifice the present moment. They believe both is possible but don't know HOW. It starts with relearning how to visi...
Creating Your Ideal Day YOUR Way
March 31, 2021 07:00 - 42 minutes - 28.9 MBThere are tons of books all about creating an ideal day or how to start your day so that you set yourself up for success. The problem with all these strategies is that they often tell you to do things that may not fit YOU and instead leave you feeling more frustrated and less productive. The truth is that your level of productivity will look different on different days and how you support your day needs to meet you where you’re at. At the same time, outlining what you want and creating routi...
#22 Creating Your Ideal Day YOUR Way
March 31, 2021 07:00 - 42 minutes - 28.9 MBThere are tons of books all about creating an ideal day or how to start your day so that you set yourself up for success. The problem with all these strategies is that they often tell you to do things that may not fit YOU and instead leave you feeling more frustrated and less productive. The truth is that your level of productivity will look different on different days and how you support your day needs to meet you where you’re at. At the same time, outlining what you want and creating routi...
It's Simple, So Why Am I Not Doing It? [coaching]
March 24, 2021 06:00 - 47 minutes - 33 MBHave you ever really wanted to do something yet kept not doing it? The woman in this session came to me because she wanted to write a book and she couldn’t figure out why she wasn’t. All her natural obstacles were gone, and she had the perfect conditions for finally doing it: stable income, older kids, stuck at home… yet she still didn’t write. In this episode of Unlimited, we dig into what creates “stuck” and develop practical steps to taking action with added inspiration from a surprise...
#21 It's Simple, So Why Am I Not Doing It?
March 24, 2021 06:00 - 47 minutes - 32.7 MBHave you ever really wanted to do something yet kept not doing it? The woman in this session came to me because she wanted to write a book and she couldn’t figure out why she wasn’t. All her natural obstacles were gone, and she had the perfect conditions for finally doing it: stable income, older kids, stuck at home… yet she still didn’t write. In this episode of Unlimited, we dig into what creates “stuck” and develop practical steps to taking action with added inspiration from a surprise...
#21 It's Simple, So Why Am I Not Doing It? [coaching]
March 24, 2021 06:00 - 47 minutes - 32.9 MBHave you ever really wanted to do something yet kept not doing it? The woman in this session came to me because she wanted to write a book and she couldn’t figure out why she wasn’t. All her natural obstacles were gone, and she had the perfect conditions for finally doing it: stable income, older kids, stuck at home… yet she still didn’t write. In this episode of Unlimited, we dig into what creates “stuck” and develop practical steps to taking action with added inspiration from a surprise...
#20 Embracing Your Identity with Ellie Dote
March 17, 2021 07:00 - 50 minutes - 34.6 MBYou can follow all the strategies but ultimately, success is multi-faceted and can only be defined by you. Yet authenticity is vulnerable and comes with greater risk, especially for people who are marginalized in our society. Stepping into greater alignment with your true self involves letting go of pieces of your life that you were previously defined by. It’s never comfortable, often messy, and there is no perfect – only progress. In this episode of the Unlimited Podcast I invited Ellie D...
Embracing Your Identity with Ellie Dote
March 17, 2021 07:00 - 50 minutes - 34.6 MBYou can follow all the strategies but ultimately, success is multi-faceted and can only be defined by you. Yet authenticity is vulnerable and comes with greater risk, especially for people who are marginalized in our society. Stepping into greater alignment with your true self involves letting go of pieces of your life that you were previously defined by. It’s never comfortable, often messy, and there is no perfect – only progress. In this episode of the Unlimited Podcast I invited Ellie D...
Toxic Positivity
March 10, 2021 08:00 - 46 minutes - 32 MBToxic positivity is a hot topic right now because the growing awareness of its presence in the health and wellness industry. It’s used as a way to spoof life coaching in the media and I’ve even had someone at a networking event assume I’d agree that a positive attitude would cure illnesses such as Covid. (That’s a no BTW – less stress helps but it’s not a cure). Based on personal and professional experiences, I’ve come to believe that it is one of the biggest blocks to personal and societal ...
#19 Toxic Positivity
March 10, 2021 08:00 - 46 minutes - 31.9 MBToxic positivity is a hot topic right now because the growing awareness of its presence in the health and wellness industry. It’s used as a way to spoof life coaching in the media and I’ve even had someone at a networking event assume I’d agree that a positive attitude would cure illnesses such as Covid. (That’s a no BTW – less stress helps but it’s not a cure). Based on personal and professional experiences, I’ve come to believe that it is one of the biggest blocks to personal and societal ...
How Do I Find What I Really Want? [coaching]
March 03, 2021 06:00 - 43 minutes - 29.7 MBA single woman in her early 40’s who loves to sing, dance, craft, and cook was contemplating starting a business in performance until the Coronapocolypse began. She’s trying to use this time now for introspection and personal development while also balancing a fulfilling but low paying day job with paying student loans and renovating a house. She signed up for this session because she has a history of people pleasing and wanted support to learn how to identify her own wants and needs more ...
#18 How Do I Find What I Really Want? [coaching]
March 03, 2021 06:00 - 43 minutes - 29.7 MBA single woman in her early 40’s who loves to sing, dance, craft, and cook was contemplating starting a business in performance until the Coronapocolypse began. She’s trying to use this time now for introspection and personal development while also balancing a fulfilling but low paying day job with paying student loans and renovating a house. She signed up for this session because she has a history of people pleasing and wanted support to learn how to identify her own wants and needs more ...
#18 What Do I Really Want?
March 03, 2021 06:00 - 43 minutes - 29.7 MBA single woman in her early 40’s who loves to sing, dance, craft, and cook was contemplating starting a business in performance until the Coronapocolypse began. She’s trying to use this time now for introspection and personal development while also balancing a fulfilling but low paying day job with paying student loans and renovating a house. She signed up for this session because she has a history of people pleasing and wanted support to learn how to identify her own wants and needs more ...
#17 Learning to Trust Ourselves with Shelly Robinson
February 24, 2021 06:00 - 38 minutes - 26.7 MBHow much do you trust yourself to make decisions? Women especially are taught in both subtle and not so subtle ways not to trust ourselves. We are given messages over and over again that we don’t know enough, that we don’t do enough, that we aren’t enough. (Then, when we ARE true to ourselves, we’re told we’re “too much.”) This feeds a need to prove ourselves and to try to control other people’s behavior and emotions for us to be “okay.” The self-relationship is the cornerstone of all relati...
Learning to Trust Ourselves with Shelly Robinson
February 24, 2021 06:00 - 38 minutes - 26.7 MBHow much do you trust yourself to make decisions? Women especially are taught in both subtle and not so subtle ways not to trust ourselves. We are given messages over and over again that we don’t know enough, that we don’t do enough, that we aren’t enough. (Then, when we ARE true to ourselves, we’re told we’re “too much.”) This feeds a need to prove ourselves and to try to control other people’s behavior and emotions for us to be “okay.” The self-relationship is the cornerstone of all relati...
#17 Learning to Trust Ourselves
February 24, 2021 06:00 - 38 minutes - 26.7 MBHow much do you trust yourself to make decisions? Women especially are taught in both subtle and not so subtle ways not to trust ourselves. We are given messages over and over again that we don’t know enough, that we don’t do enough, that we aren’t enough. (Then, when we ARE true to ourselves, we’re told we’re “too much.”) This feeds a need to prove ourselves and to try to control other people’s behavior and emotions for us to be “okay.” The self-relationship is the cornerstone of all relati...
Feeling Confident Being Visible [coaching]
February 17, 2021 09:00 - 42 minutes - 29.6 MBThis gifted intuitive is tired of just “getting by” in a job she doesn’t feel spiritually or emotionally fulfilled by. She recently became certified as a crystal practitioner and is working toward a tarot certification and wants to start a business but struggles to believe she really can. As a recovering alcoholic she’s done a lot of self-work in recovery as well as around a traumatic past. Her hope from this session was to uncover and explore what attitudes/beliefs were holding her back and...
#16 Feeling Confident Being Visible [coaching]
February 17, 2021 09:00 - 42 minutes - 29.5 MBThis gifted intuitive is tired of just “getting by” in a job she doesn’t feel spiritually or emotionally fulfilled by. She recently became certified as a crystal practitioner and is working toward a tarot certification and wants to start a business but struggles to believe she really can. As a recovering alcoholic she’s done a lot of self-work in recovery as well as around a traumatic past. Her hope from this session was to uncover and explore what attitudes/beliefs were holding her back and...
#16 Feeling Confident Being Visible
February 17, 2021 09:00 - 42 minutes - 29.5 MBThis gifted intuitive is tired of just “getting by” in a job she doesn’t feel spiritually or emotionally fulfilled by. She recently became certified as a crystal practitioner and is working toward a tarot certification and wants to start a business but struggles to believe she really can. As a recovering alcoholic she’s done a lot of self-work in recovery as well as around a traumatic past. Her hope from this session was to uncover and explore what attitudes/beliefs were holding her back and...
#15 Owning Your Worth
February 10, 2021 07:00 - 41 minutes - 28.4 MBMarried, mom of a 3 year old, wants to make a career shift but is feeling stuck as to how. She had a near death experience after her son’s birth that rearranged her priorities and inspired the non-profit she started. She has a PhD in virology and is working on her Masters in Public Health but has been struggling to land a position that fits the work she wants to do. Her hope from this session was to have a little bit more clarity and an idea for a path forward. In this episode of Unlimited,...
Owning Your Worth [coaching]
February 10, 2021 07:00 - 41 minutes - 28.4 MBMarried, mom of a 3 year old, wants to make a career shift but is feeling stuck as to how. She had a near death experience after her son’s birth that rearranged her priorities and inspired the non-profit she started. She has a PhD in virology and is working on her Masters in Public Health but has been struggling to land a position that fits the work she wants to do. Her hope from this session was to have a little bit more clarity and an idea for a path forward. In this episode of Unlimited,...
#15 Owning Your Worth [coaching]
February 10, 2021 07:00 - 41 minutes - 28.4 MBMarried, mom of a 3 year old, wants to make a career shift but is feeling stuck as to how. She had a near death experience after her son’s birth that rearranged her priorities and inspired the non-profit she started. She has a PhD in virology and is working on her Masters in Public Health but has been struggling to land a position that fits the work she wants to do. Her hope from this session was to have a little bit more clarity and an idea for a path forward. In this episode of Unlimited,...
Planting Seeds to Take Confident Action
February 03, 2021 08:00 - 29 minutes - 20 MBWe are right between winter and spring equinox, which is a time for preparing seeds to plant for the year. The next few coaching sessions I’m sharing in the next few weeks all centered around finding not only clarity to take action but uncovering the hidden blocks to confidence that were ultimately preventing that clarity. Ultimately this is a deeply personal process (as you’ll see in the coaching episodes) but there are some concepts that can help you engage your own process. In this epis...
#14 Planting Seeds to Take Confident Action
February 03, 2021 08:00 - 29 minutes - 20 MBWe are right between winter and spring equinox, which is a time for preparing seeds to plant for the year. The next few coaching sessions I’m sharing in the next few weeks all centered around finding not only clarity to take action but uncovering the hidden blocks to confidence that were ultimately preventing that clarity. Ultimately this is a deeply personal process (as you’ll see in the coaching episodes) but there are some concepts that can help you engage your own process. In this epis...
#13 Breaking through Paralysis by Analysis [coaching]
January 27, 2021 07:00 - 35 minutes - 24.1 MBMulti-passionate entrepreneur and married mom of 2 wants to create a new branch of her business but is lost in the weeds of how. A self-identified “ideas person” she’s been stuck in analysis paralysis for months now. She signed up for this session because she was longing for someone to just tell her the “right way” even though she knows there isn’t really a “right way.” In this episode of Unlimited, we dig in to understand the block and use that knowledge to help her create a plan that app...
Breaking through Paralysis by Analysis [coaching]
January 27, 2021 07:00 - 35 minutes - 24.2 MBMulti-passionate entrepreneur and married mom of 2 wants to create a new branch of her business but is lost in the weeds of how. A self-identified “ideas person” she’s been stuck in analysis paralysis for months now. She signed up for this session because she was longing for someone to just tell her the “right way” even though she knows there isn’t really a “right way.” In this episode of Unlimited, we dig in to understand the block and use that knowledge to help her create a plan that app...
#13 [Coaching Session] Breaking through Paralysis by Analysis
January 27, 2021 07:00 - 35 minutes - 24.1 MBMulti-passionate entrepreneur and married mom of 2 wants to create a new branch of her business but is lost in the weeds of how. A self-identified “ideas person” she’s been stuck in analysis paralysis for months now. She signed up for this session because she was longing for someone to just tell her the “right way” even though she knows there isn’t really a “right way.” In this episode of Unlimited, we dig in to understand the block and use that knowledge to help her create a plan that app...
#13 Breaking through Paralysis by Analysis
January 27, 2021 07:00 - 35 minutes - 24.1 MBMulti-passionate entrepreneur and married mom of 2 wants to create a new branch of her business but is lost in the weeds of how. A self-identified “ideas person” she’s been stuck in analysis paralysis for months now. She signed up for this session because she was longing for someone to just tell her the “right way” even though she knows there isn’t really a “right way.” In this episode of Unlimited, we dig in to understand the block and use that knowledge to help her create a plan that app...
Clarifying Next Steps [coaching]
January 20, 2021 06:00 - 39 minutes - 27.2 MBWhat is coaching? It’s a question I get asked a lot and I talk about it in episode #1 but it’s one thing to talk about and another thing to experience. So, I put out an invitation to participate in a recorded coaching session to share with you and received a number of applications. Today’s episode of Unlimited is the first of those sessions. In this episode of Unlimited, I share a coaching session I did with an artist, community activist, entrepreneur, and soon to be divorced mom of a teena...
#12 Clarifying Next Steps
January 20, 2021 06:00 - 39 minutes - 27.2 MBWhat is coaching? It’s a question I get asked a lot and I talk about it in episode #1 but it’s one thing to talk about and another thing to experience. So, I put out an invitation to participate in a recorded coaching session to share with you and received a number of applications. Today’s episode of Unlimited is the first of those sessions. In this episode of Unlimited, I share a coaching session I did with an artist, community activist, entrepreneur, and soon to be divorced mom of a teena...
#12 [Coaching Session] Clarifying Next Steps
January 20, 2021 06:00 - 39 minutes - 27.2 MBWhat is coaching? It’s a question I get asked a lot and I talk about it in episode #1 but it’s one thing to talk about and another thing to experience. So, I put out an invitation to participate in a recorded coaching session to share with you and received a number of applications. Today’s episode of Unlimited is the first of those sessions. In this episode of Unlimited, I share a coaching session I did with an artist, community activist, entrepreneur, and soon to be divorced mom of a teena...
#12 Clarifying Next Steps [coaching]
January 20, 2021 06:00 - 39 minutes - 27.2 MBWhat is coaching? It’s a question I get asked a lot and I talk about it in episode #1 but it’s one thing to talk about and another thing to experience. So, I put out an invitation to participate in a recorded coaching session to share with you and received a number of applications. Today’s episode of Unlimited is the first of those sessions. In this episode of Unlimited, I share a coaching session I did with an artist, community activist, entrepreneur, and soon to be divorced mom of a teena...
Relearning Self-Love
January 13, 2021 06:00 - 33 minutes - 23.1 MBThere is A LOT going on right now. It’s heavy and draining yet you don’t want to get sucked into the yuck. You want to be a light in the darkness. You want to show up for the people who you love and the things that really matter. Your relationship with yourself is the foundation for your relationship with everyone and everything else, however it tends to be the thing we poke holes in first. In this episode of Unlimited, I’m diving into actively cultivating self-love, especially in times whe...
#11 Relearning Self-Love
January 13, 2021 06:00 - 33 minutes - 23.1 MBThere is A LOT going on right now. It’s heavy and draining yet you don’t want to get sucked into the yuck. You want to be a light in the darkness. You want to show up for the people who you love and the things that really matter. Your relationship with yourself is the foundation for your relationship with everyone and everything else, however it tends to be the thing we poke holes in first. In this episode of Unlimited, I’m diving into actively cultivating self-love, especially in times whe...