Says Who?
341 episodes - English - Latest episode: 4 days ago - ★★★★★ - 354 ratingsIn 2016, two friends—and author and a journalist--sat down to ride through the final weeks of the Presidential election by talking to the journalists covering it. They thought they were doing eight episodes. They were wrong. What started as a short trip has become a long and strange journey. They’ve gotten weird. They’ve made friends along the way. Mostly, the weird part, though.
Join #1 New York Times bestselling author Maureen Johnson, and legendary publisher of Punk Planet Magazine Dan Sinker as they digest the news each week. Says Who: it’s not a podcast—it’s a coping strategy.
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Episodes
NEW YORK STATE OF MIND
April 24, 2024 05:05 - 1 hour - 55.4 MBThis week, we find out that Maureen’s been right about New York all along: It’s the place to be. Everything happens there! Broadway! Great food! Amazing music! Cutting-edge dance and fashion! Large-scale arrests! Weird trials! Trash in bins! You name it, New York has it. It’s all NYC, all the time this week. Chicago can absolutely eat it. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
SNOOZEFLASH
April 17, 2024 05:05 - 1 hour - 57.2 MBOh hello, SaysWhovia. Maureen was just getting her mail. What’s this? A jury summons? LOL, that’s a joke, of course. She would never be so lucky. It’s the ticket of the season! Which lucky New Yorkers will get to hang out in a waiting room with hundreds of other hopefuls, all trying out for one of the big roles as a Trump juror. Everyone is excited! Except, perhaps, except Donal Trump, who keeps taking court naps. He does not want to be there. He is bored and itchy and needs a snack. Meanw...
WOODCHIPPER
April 10, 2024 05:05 - 1 hour - 57.9 MBOh hello, SaysWhovia. We were just examining this ancient book of spells and portents. Let’s see…an earthquake, an eclipse, lightning hitting the Empire State Building…oh. Just a typical week in New York City. Nothing weird going on at all. Oh wait. The Trump trial is about to start in Maureen’s hometown! That must be it. 2024 is finally turning on the gas and showing us what’s made of. Or IS it? Is it still making us wait? Why is Dan just listing the names of cities? Why is Maureen coughin...
THE LENTIL PRINCESS
April 03, 2024 05:05 - 1 hour - 55.3 MBSaysWhovia, Maureen has had a rough week. But it's OK because she's TOTALLY FINE. Yes, that's what she is. She is also the lentil princess, so she has that going for her. Meanwhile the world is going to complete and utter shi... Happy days for she's the lentil princess! Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
INCORPORATE THE INTERRUPTION
March 27, 2024 05:05 - 1 hour - 60.3 MBSays Whovians! 2024 is starting to show its whole ass now as the former president Goes Through Some Things in the last 24 hours and somehow has emerged... better off? Great. Also, Dan is in Colorado and Maureen is at her folks and, well, she's coming in hot. And then, suddenly, she's reading from the elaborate guide for getting on the internet she made for her parents back in the 90s. As one does. Ride the weird wind. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Pat...
A CAREFULLY BALANCED DAN IN A CAREFULLY BALANCED VAN
March 20, 2024 05:05 - 56 minutes - 51.7 MBSometimes, SayWhovia, it’s important to think about balance. Work and life balance. Physical balance. Bank balance. The balance of an overladen van teetering on the edge of a cliff. This is the balance episode, where all of these things will come up. Dan’s work and life balance is a little off again. Maureen is learning physical balance! Trump has a low bank balance. And off of us are living out the end sequence of the 1967 classic film, the Italian Job. This episode makes more sense than m...
FOG OF JUDGEMENT
March 06, 2024 06:05 - 51 minutes - 47.6 MBIt’s Super Tuesday, SaysWhovia! How are YOU celebrating? A party? A casual gathering? A quiet cry in the closet? All of these are valid! And who will win? No one knows! Except, everyone! Meanwhile, Maureen reveals the joys of living in New York City once again, Dan gets a new fencepost, and COVID is over! More importantly, plans for Disney on Election Day are being finalized. It’s really happening. Dan and Maureen are going to ride the Haunted Mansion as the results come in, and then Says W...
TICK TOCK DOLE WHIP O'CLOCK
February 28, 2024 06:05 - 58 minutes - 53.9 MBThis week, Maureen spends a lot of time convincing Dan it’s time to get serious about making Disney plans for the election while Dan falls gently to pieces. It’s that time. Get in line with us, SaysWhovia. Note: this episode contains a brief discussion of the death of Aaron Bushnell. There is no detailed discussion of physical events, but the significance is discussed for a short time. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
AN IDEA, A FEELING, AND A HAT
February 21, 2024 06:05 - 59 minutes - 54.7 MBBrrrr. Shut the door! There’s a cold winter wind blowing. All is snug and safe here in the Says Who fort. Dan’s son is recovering from COVID and has had adventures in a hotel room. Mauren wants to get right to the news! 2024 is ramping up! Trump is making shiny shoes because he owes SO MUCH MONEY. So much money! Surely these shiny sneakers will fix everything. Seriously, though—he owes all the money. Does he have it? How will he get it? How many shiny shoes will be sell? And what’s with th...
HAUNTED WHITE HOUSE
February 14, 2024 06:05 - 1 hour - 61.5 MBIt’s 2024, SaysWhovia. Everything has changed. Dan has too many jobs. Maureen bought a planner. Trump is running against Biden and Biden is running against Trump. Wait… We’ve been on this ride, haven’t we? No matter. We’ll get in line again. And there are always new twists. For example, Dan’s new job is in the MORNING. Maureen’s new planner is DIFFERENT. Trump is threatening to KILL US ALL. It’s still the same, isn't it? Come with us anyway, SayWhovia. We’ll hold your place in line. Sa...
TALE OF THE WHALE
February 07, 2024 06:05 - 52 minutes - 47.8 MBMaureen is in paradise; Dan is in Chicago. You can probably guess how this is going to go. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
MAUREEN'S PLAN
January 24, 2024 06:05 - 1 hour - 58.5 MBIt’s the first big political event of 2024, sort of! It’s the New Hampshire primary, and everyone is excited. Right? Is that excitement? Dan isn’t sure. Ron DeSantis has dropped out of the race, dragging Florida down with him into the swamp, where he will live with sewage and alligators. Trump continues to be on trial. So…is any of this news? Is it news if you knew it already? What to do with this zombie of a year? Enter Maureen, with a plan. She has a plan, everyone. A good plan to fix i...
IOWA YOU AN EXPLAINATION
January 17, 2024 06:05 - 1 hour - 58.8 MBCome in! Take a seat her by the fire that Maureen and Dan have made sure to keep burnin’. Have some hot tea. Get a blanket. It’s cold! At least, it is at Dan’s house. For some reason, Maureen’s place is a thousand degrees, her feet are trapped in a footstool, and she can’t see right out of one eye. No matter. No one wants to come into 2024 being able to see all of it. Best to keep it in soft focus. The Iowa caucus has happened! And…um. It happened! Exactly as everyone knew it would! There i...
GHOSTWROTER
January 10, 2024 06:05 - 1 hour - 55.6 MBOh hey! Dan and Maureen are swinging into the first week of 2024 with ease and style! Maureen has left behind her dead snake and gotten a fast car back to New York City because things got complicated. Dan dropped his son off at the airport to return to school and is definitely not still crying. But also, VAXXING. Because COVID is back for year four. And would you believe it, it’s infecting people in the SAME EXACT WAY it surges every year. Who would have known. Meanwhile, Trump is in court ...
KEEP BURNIN'
January 03, 2024 06:05 - 59 minutes - 54.1 MBWelcome to 2024, motherf****rs. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
PREPISODE: 2024
December 27, 2023 06:05 - 32 minutes - 30.1 MBSaysWhovians! The year is RAPIDLY coming to a close, and Maureen and Dan are building a (don't call it a) bunker and stocking it with everything we need to make it through 2024. Yes, it's a VERY SPECIAL Prepisode! (Note: this was recorded ahead of Maureen heading to England in mid-December) Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
FOOT LINE
December 13, 2023 06:05 - 1 hour - 59 MBWell, it’s that time of year again! Not the holidays—but for Maureen to have a weird medical issue in the middle of a deadline. She’s fine. She had a line. A real line. On her foot. Dan does not believe her. Meanwhile, Dan has a story about a bad man and his bad friends. Not Friends, the show he never watched. These are Evil Friends, and they have ruined a good place. Yes, we have to talk about Elon Musk. But on a bright note, Moms for Liberty is getting their ass handed to them all over t...
DREAM BIGGEST
December 06, 2023 06:05 - 1 hour - 57.3 MBMaureen is trying to take a bath. Maureen is trying to do a lot of things. She is having some trouble, but is not giving up. Dan has advice. Maybe she should take it easy? But that’s not the SaysWhovian way. Maureen is going TO THE MAXX. And so is the subject of today’s story—a little dreamer named George Santos. Keep dreaming, SayWhovia. Then dream bigger. Dream biggest. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
THE FRANCHISE
November 29, 2023 06:05 - 1 hour - 58.2 MBHello, SayWhovia! Did you make it through Thanksgiving? Dan and Maureen did! Mostly! Dan has only part of a car, though. And Maureen is still in Philadelphia. She went to the craft store. She has a tale to tell. Many tales—tales of birds in walls, spiders, slugs—so many creatures. She may never leave Philadelphia. She is trapped forever, like she is in the Phantom Zone. Dan does not want to talk about the news, but Maureen insists on a little, as a treat. So it’s just a little. But it does ...
BIRTHDAYS AND DEADLINES
November 15, 2023 06:05 - 1 hour - 56.4 MBIt's someone's birthday! And someone else is on deadline! And there are nightmares happening in the world. So you know it's a real normal one over in SaysWhovia. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
THE EYE OF THE PORN
November 08, 2023 06:05 - 58 minutes - 53.8 MBToday, Dan and Maureen celebrate their favorite holiday: Happy Four Seasons Total Landscaping Day! Yes, it’s been three years since the best day ever. In the present, Maureen is focused on her book. She’s going to make the landing, but what a landing it will be. Dan, meanwhile, has a haunted mouth. And he’s not the only one! Because somewhere out there is an app called Covenant Eyes, and our new Speaker of the House loves it. He uses it with his son. To monitor their mutual porn use. Say it...
DE-PENCE
November 01, 2023 05:05 - 58 minutes - 53.7 MBOh, hello, SaysWhovian! What a nice costume you have! Dan and Maureen have treats for you! Here’s a Snickers, a Kit Kat, a Reece’s Cup… and also, the news! Which, as you may have noticed, IS SCARY THIS WEEK. Too scary for Halloween. But the most scared person is Mike Pence, who dropped out of the Presidential race because he’s adorable. They were going to kill that guy! Meanwhile, Trump keeps going to court, and the in the UK, there’s a reckoning over COVID. At least, people are swearing at...
NUT PUNCHIN SEASON
October 25, 2023 05:05 - 59 minutes - 54.1 MBAs always, dear listener, news happened after Maureen and Dan finished recording. These two sweet innocent children believed that Tom Emmer would at least make it to a floor vote before dropping out of the speaker's race. Joke's on them. And all of us. Also, lots of people flipping on Trump. Or maybe Rudy. Probably Rudy. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
PODCRAFTING
October 18, 2023 05:05 - 56 minutes - 52 MBToday, Dan and Maureen battle a series of seemingly endless recording failures, while everyone’s worst gym teacher, Jim Jordan, tries to become head of Slytherin. And because this is a week of truly horrific news, we talk about self care. For example, Maureen is in PA and has gone to Michael’s craft store. Also, Dan tells a story about getting stuck inside his haunted car. All of this with a microphone balanced on a plastic pumpkin. Get your glue gun, SaysWhovia. Things are getting sti...
RUDY TUESDAY
October 11, 2023 05:05 - 55 minutes - 50.5 MBNo, YOU’RE drunk, SaysWhovia. *hic* *falls in trash* Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
BIG MAC CITY
October 04, 2023 05:05 - 1 hour - 58.6 MBOctober has arrived, and the very first trick or treat bags have appeared on the streets of NYC! Trump is on trial, and he is ordering a lot of McDonalds. Lots and lots of McDonalds. He has a lot of feelings to eat as he risks losing all his towers. Yes, trial season has started. It comes earlier every year, doesn’t it? They’re even starting to flip down in Georgia. Meanwhile, the House is losing its Speaker. Large-headed predator Matt Gaetz is leading the charge. It’s all quite a lot, and ...
FUN LADY
September 27, 2023 05:05 - 1 hour - 60.3 MBMaureen has been out in the rain. She is damp and bedraggled. Dan is here to cheer her up with news! The WGA strike appears to be over! Collection action works! So we’ve got that going for us! Also, the government is probably going to shut down, a Democratic Senator is taking gold bars, there’s a debate happening that no one wants to watch, and Donald Trump expressed a wish to buy a Glock. But all of this is just preamble to Maureen talking about a weird meeting, and Dan recreating that ...
SAYS BOOBERT
September 20, 2023 05:05 - 1 hour - 55.8 MBAfter the tribulations of last week, Maureen and Dan are back and in better form. They have nice shirts on. They’re awake. Everything’s going great! Except that there’s COVID in the house of mj. Also, she saw a good dead rat. Was last week a dream? Did that impeachment threat ever materialize? No. No one can explain it. But Hunter Biden is in the news because of a gun. Because we care about guns now? lol. Also, Lauren Boebert went to a show. Things got juicy. Put your phones and vapes aw...
SAVE DAN SINKER
September 13, 2023 05:05 - 1 hour - 55.7 MBDan hasn’t slept in four days. Maureen just had a root canal three hours ago and is still groggy from drugs. Things start a bit loosey-goosey, but take a strong turn when Maureen tells Dan about some news he hasn’t heard. A certain dot f y I fella isn’t quite ready to handle it. Group nap after this one, Sayswhovia. Group nap. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
YOU'LL BE A DENTIST
September 06, 2023 05:05 - 50 minutes - 46.5 MBImagine you start an episode and you discuss the events of the week and then someone gets a toothache and it gets worse and worse and you end up cutting things short. Just imagine. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
GET ON THE BUS
August 30, 2023 05:05 - 59 minutes - 54.7 MBEveryone's back home! Summer is coming to a close and school is back in session. But mostly... get ready for a bonkers fall which will be nothing compared to the spring. Come March, right now is what you will be nostalgic for. Yes, there were mugshots but mostly things got weird. Here comes the school bus, get on board. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
SOMEONE GET CLINT
August 23, 2023 05:05 - 57 minutes - 52.6 MBGreetings from the road, SaysWhovia! Well, Maureen isn’t exactly on the road. She’s in Philadelphia, though occasionally sounds like she's underwater (we don't know why and apologize). But Dan very much is, and the road is not being nice to Dan. Dan is having a time of it, and it doesn’t help that the Trump Fuck Around And Find Out calendar is again targeting him personally. Yes, we’re ending a hot and weird summer and likely going into a hot and even weirder fall. So many trials. So many...
REACH FOR THE ORANGE
August 16, 2023 05:18 - 1 hour - 57.4 MBDan is off dropping the teen off at college and stopped crying long enough to record. And that's good because there has been NEWS and Maureen wants to talk about it while Dan just wants to pick oranges and weep. Anyway, there's been an indictment! No, not the Georgia one, which happened about 5 hours after these two finished recording, but the other indictment which happened just after they finished recording *last* time. Remember when this podcast used to come out only every two weeks...
EAT THE CANDLE, KID
August 02, 2023 05:05 - 1 hour - 55.8 MBCheerio! Maureen is in England, where everything is cool and rainy. There is cream and tea and cake and ice cream and teeth—all the classics. Meanwhile, Dan is somewhere in a heat swamp next to a sewage drain situation. So everything is as it should be! Dan and Maureen catch up, talking about the summer, life, how everything is on fire, and how Mitch McConnell stopped working for a while. And about indictments. So many indictments. It’s a good thing neither of them run a site called indict...
SUMMER MELTDOWN
July 19, 2023 05:05 - 59 minutes - 54 MBIt's summertime and the living is... well, the living is not that easy. It's hot for one, and there's a lot going on. A lot. So much. Too much. Plus, it's summertime and that means summer travels for both Maureen and Dan. Turn a fan on, dunk yourself into some cold water, and listen in. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
SLIP N SLIDE
July 12, 2023 05:05 - 1 hour - 58.5 MBThis week, Maureen is too hot and too wet. New York is not easy in the summer. Dan has ideas to help, but Maureen is not interested. She’s also not the only person who is too hot and too wet. It’s a Climate Change Summer! How do people keep doing normal stuff while the world changes around us? Not sure! Meanwhile, Dan is preparing to send his oldest child off to college and he is…not okay! Neither is Rudy Giuliani, for that matter. And possibly Donald Trump. Their problems continue to attac...
MAYHEM GRAVY
July 05, 2023 05:05 - 1 hour - 57.3 MBThis week, the Supreme Court did some stuff. It wasn’t great! But remember; this system is FLAWLESS! Also, Elon Musk did some stuff! But remember: rich people are always smart? Dan and Maureen probe these and other life lessons. This is basically the summer calm before the fall storm so enjoy it while you can! Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
DING!
June 28, 2023 05:05 - 57 minutes - 53.1 MBToday, Dan and Maureen talk about the Russian coup—or, no they don’t. No one knows what that was about! So they get down to the new Trump tapes. But mostly this is about Maureen’s speed dating strategy and Dan saying “Ding!” Ding! Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
SALMON HAT
June 21, 2023 05:05 - 1 hour - 57.6 MBFirst, Maureen wants to talk about the terrible and entirely predictable story of the missing submarine. Maureen has been thinking a lot about things that go in the water as she has spent the weekend in the Thousand Islands. She suggests that SaysWhovia resettle there. It is peaceful and lush, with clear water and nice people who commute on jet skis and eat ice cream all day. Dan likes this idea, but has other things on his mind. In a move that he takes as a personal attack, Trump’s initial...
TRON CLUB
June 15, 2023 05:05 - 1 hour - 55 MBMaureen insisted that Dan get off the airplane and record because a few things have happened since he left for Disney World. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
ROLLING THUNDER
June 07, 2023 05:05 - 1 hour - 58.4 MBGreetings SaysWhovia! By the time you read this, Dan is already halfway up Big Thunder Mountain and Maureen is packing for beautiful checks notes Syracuse. Yes, it's summertime in SaysWhovia, and that means things are getting a little loose. But not so loose that Maureen and Dan miss the BIG NEWS, that the MAN THAT EVERYONE WANTED TO KILL, Mike Pence, has decided to run for president. And what better way to convince a lot of people that literally erected a gallows in your honor to vote for...
MARGINALLY EMPLOYED
May 31, 2023 05:05 - 1 hour - 56.2 MBThis week, Maureen gets to the bottom of her notebook crisis. Dan has an emotional breakthrough at a barbecue. And Ron DeSantis enters the ring in the most SaysWhovian way possible. Grab another Spicy Sizzler Sando, SaysWhovia! Because we’re not going anywhere! Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho
CRYSTAL CHINOS
May 24, 2023 13:26 - 1 hour - 56.1 MBWelcome to this week’s Says Who, where… oh, Maureen’s already off the rails. She needs to tell you all about her gynecologist’s TV career and all of his bees. Dan tries to steer the car back on to the road to Florida, where Ron DeSantis continues tilting at windmills and Marco Rubio gets mad at a distant baseball game. But Maureen lunges for the wheel again. Since this week is about weird hobbies and grifters, why not bring it all home to the Says Who commune. Maureen has a plan to fund ...
SOMEBODY GET GARY
May 17, 2023 05:05 - 1 hour - 56.9 MBWell, SaysWhovia, we begin this week with tales of Rudy Giuliani—terrible tales that Dan and Maureen go over in not great detail, because the details are not great. (For those worried about the more upsetting content, we skip this completely. We’ve got your back on this.) There are tales of pardons for sale and bags of phones. Which somehow leads Dan to a long discussion of the Most Dan Side Quest Ever, and the adventures of an imaginary Ron and fake Paul Stanley from KISS, a sinkhole, a sui...
TOO MUCH NEWS
May 10, 2023 05:05 - 1 hour - 63.4 MBIn a SaysWho first, Dan and Maureen break into their own podcast with... another podcast. Literally the moment after they finished recording today's episode which was about the E Jean Carroll lawsuit against Donald Trump, the verdict came in. So, back to the microphones! Then, during that, George Santos is charged with…something? So, it's one of those easy days. Also Maureen may have a new boyfriend. Hold on to your butts, SayWhovia. This one comes at you fast. Says Who is made possibl...
HARRY POTTER AND THE GO F**K YOURSELF STONE
May 03, 2023 05:05 - 59 minutes - 54.9 MBOnce again, Maureen is in Pennsylvania, surrounded by eagles, beavers, turtles, and floating sheds. Dan is in Chicago, marveling at the new adult human he has produced. And that’s it! Well, until Dan goes pro and gets to the news. Trans rights and humanity are under attack, and Maureen…well, Maureen goes off. (Content note: trans friends, this one should be a-okay to listen to because instead of hearing bad stuff with no pushback you get to listen to Maureen throwing f-bombs at a once-belo...
HAPPY FEET
April 26, 2023 18:20 - 1 hour - 56.9 MBMaureen’s fresh off a plane from Los Angeles, full of tacos and weird vibes. Dan is in his workshop, full of ideas and news. So many things to talk about. There’s the Fox lawsuit settlement. There’s Tucker, and Dom, and Nate Silver, and the Pillow Guy. But there’s also a very excited shoe, A very excited shoe. We’re about to do 2020 all over again. Low and slow. Walk with us, SaysWhovia. We have a lot to discuss. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at pat...
DAN NEEDS A NAP
April 19, 2023 05:05 - 1 hour - 55.4 MBDoes anyone have a pillow or blanket? Dan’s here, at least in body. He has just arrived back from LA and he has not slept. Maureen is worried. Against medical advice, Dan proceeds to the news. It’s the next chapter in the Disney saga. DeSantis is taking things personally. Things are getting weird. Do you know how hard it is to be weird in Florida? Meanwhile, Dan should really go to bed. Get cozy, SaysWhovia. It’s time to curl up and listen to a man fall apart in real time. Says Who is ma...
MOUSETRAP
April 12, 2023 05:05 - 59 minutes - 54.3 MBIt’s finally time, SaysWhovia. Dan and Maureen are going on their long-planned trip to DisneyWorld! Sort of! Dan has a story to tell everyone at any rate—a long and wonderful tale of a man named Ron who decided to make beef with a big mouse. This story has everything! Sort of Nazis! A frozen head! Magic water! The British royal family! And the fate of a man who thought he could take down Disney. He fucked around, and he found out. Get a drink and sit back. Dan is here to tell it all. Say...
SEE YOU TOMORROW: ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT
April 05, 2023 17:56 - 1 hour - 57.3 MBWe entered a See You Tomorrow situation fully expecting to see you tomorrow, but then two weeks passed, Maureen floated in the water then had a near-death experience, while Dan just kept stacking more plates into his spinning-plate pile and then, Donald Trump went and got himself arrested and now, finally we SEE YOU TOMORROW, today. Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho