Tales from the Drum artwork

Tales from the Drum

285 episodes - English - Latest episode: over 2 years ago - ★★★★★ - 8 ratings

On the first, second, and third Friday of every month, it’s Tales From the Drum—the Mended Drum, that is. We also bring you three-minute long mini-episodes, cleverly entitled Pratchips (like potato chips, see?) every Monday-Thursday. All of these are (usually) about the places, spaces, races, and other words that end in aces of the Discworld, that pizza-shaped place (but no anchovies) that rides through space on the backs of the massive elephants Tubul, Berilia, Jerakeen and Great T’Phon, which themselves stand atop the 10,000 mile-long world Turtle, A’Tuin. (According to the dwarfs, there was once a Fifth Elephant, which slipped of A’Tuin’s carapace and crashed into the Disc. But the dwarfs can be funny that way.) Obviously, a place such as this could exist only every normal curve must have its outliers, where the fabric of reality is thin, and magic is an everyday—well, reality. Of course, it was actually the late Sir Terry Pratchett, OBE, who created the Discworld. He chronicled those places, spaces, etc. in 41 Discworld novels. In 500 years, he will probably be the only 20th-century author who is still being read. Seriously. He was that good. He was also incredibly prolific. In a span of 32 years, he wrote 70 books. They’ve sold northward of 50 million copies, last I saw. He was knighted in 2008 by Queen Elizabeth II. Sir Terry passed away in 2015 from a rare form of early onset Alzheimer’s disease. GNU Terry Pratchett. If you don’t understand that, you can find out about it in Going Postal. Also, il miglior fabbro. That’s from T.S. Eliot’s “The Waste Land.” But you knew that. Thanks for listening—and mind how you go! GNU Terry Pratchett

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Episodes

Pratchips 29- By Jingo!

August 24, 2021 18:00 - 2 minutes - 2.06 MB

Jingo, #21 in the Discworld series, is our subject for today.  The Patrician recruits Leonard of Quirm, Fred Colon and Nobby Nobbs to help him stop a war. In a submarine. What else could you want? (Oh, the Patrician demonstrates jaw-dropping juggling skills, even though he’s never juggled before. Ever. Email us at our new address: [email protected]. You never know what might happen!!    Thanks for listening.   GNU Terry Pratchett    Mind how y'all go. 

Season 10 episode 6–Fred and Nobby

August 20, 2021 23:00 - 20 minutes - 14.1 MB

Remember that we have two contests going on: The Portal Poetry Contest, and the Name That Show Contest. Deadline for entries for each contest is NEXT FRIDAY, August 20th.         The Poetry Contest is your chance to get creative, and to maybe win a custom episode of the Portal just for you. Send you poems to me at [email protected], and I will read them on the show (unless you’d rather I didn’t). I’ll also select three winners from among the entries, and those three winners will each rec...

Fred and Nobby

August 20, 2021 23:00 - 20 minutes - 14.1 MB

Remember that we have two contests going on: The Portal Poetry Contest, and the Name That Show Contest. Deadline for entries for each contest is NEXT FRIDAY, August 20th.         The Poetry Contest is your chance to get creative, and to maybe win a custom episode of the Portal just for you. Send you poems to me at [email protected], and I will read them on the show (unless you’d rather I didn’t). I’ll also select three winners from among the entries, and those three winners will each rec...

Fred and Nobby (S10E6)

August 20, 2021 23:00 - 20 minutes - 14.1 MB

Remember that we have two contests going on: The Portal Poetry Contest, and the Name That Show Contest. Deadline for entries for each contest is NEXT FRIDAY, August 20th.         The Poetry Contest is your chance to get creative, and to maybe win a custom episode of the Portal just for you. Send you poems to me at [email protected], and I will read them on the show (unless you’d rather I didn’t). I’ll also select three winners from among the entries, and those three winners will each rec...

Pratchips 28–Ghlen Livid (hmm)

August 19, 2021 23:00 - 2 minutes - 2.09 MB

Reannuals travel back in time, so Ghlen Livid, made from the reannual called the Vul Nut, can give its drinkers a vision of the future, which is, from the nut’s point of view, the past.  With Ghlen Livid you get a hangunder—a hangover which precedes the drinking.  Reannuals are strange, to put it mildly. You harvest them the year before you plant them. If you forget to plant the seeds after you’ve harvested them, you may be endangering the entire fabric of causality. That would be bad.  B...

Ghlen Livid (PCv2n8)

August 19, 2021 23:00 - 2 minutes - 2.08 MB

Reannuals travel back in time, so Ghlen Livid, made from the reannual called the Vul Nut, can give its drinkers a vision of the future, which is, from the nut’s point of view, the past.  With Ghlen Livid you get a hangunder—a hangover which precedes the drinking.  Reannuals are strange, to put it mildly. You harvest them the year before you plant them. If you forget to plant the seeds after you’ve harvested them, you may be endangering the entire fabric of causality. That would be bad.  B...

The Great Outdoors (PCv2n7)

August 19, 2021 23:00 - 2 minutes - 2.08 MB

The Great Outdoors is a geographic area most Discworld readers will not recognize. That’s because it’s far from Ankh-Morpork, or any other locale found in the novels. It’s a wild and unsettled area, just as the name implies. Today you find out just enough about it to get yourself into trouble. Be the first to email us at our new address: [email protected]. You never know what might happen!!    Thanks for listening.   GNU Terry Pratchett    Mind how y'all go. 

Pratchips 27–The Great Outdoors

August 19, 2021 23:00 - 2 minutes - 2.09 MB

The Great Outdoors is a geographic area most Discworld readers will not recognize. That’s because it’s far from Ankh-Morpork, or any other locale found in the novels. It’s a wild and unsettled area, just as the name implies. Today you find out just enough about it to get yourself into trouble. Be the first to email us at our new address: [email protected]. You never know what might happen!!    Thanks for listening.   GNU Terry Pratchett    Mind how y'all go. 

The Great Outdoors (PCn2v7)

August 19, 2021 23:00 - 2 minutes - 2.08 MB

The Great Outdoors is a geographic area most Discworld readers will not recognize. That’s because it’s far from Ankh-Morpork, or any other locale found in the novels. It’s a wild and unsettled area, just as the name implies. Today you find out just enough about it to get yourself into trouble. Be the first to email us at our new address: [email protected]. You never know what might happen!!    Thanks for listening.   GNU Terry Pratchett    Mind how y'all go. 

Pratchips 26– Done It Duncan

August 17, 2021 23:00 - 2 minutes - 2.09 MB

Done It Duncan is our first person of the week. Duncan is a resident of Ankh Morpor, and according to Carrot, the worst thief in Ankh Morpork. He's also the best informant, though, since it's all a game designed to get him a night in a warm cell and a hot meal. "It wasn't the Der Brys gang which knocked over Portin's warehouse. It was me!" Thank you for your inadvertent public service, Mr. Duncan-- as Carrot might put it. Be the first to email us at our new address: www.medievalgnome@gmail...

Done It Duncan (PCv2n6)

August 17, 2021 23:00 - 2 minutes - 2.08 MB

Done It Duncan is our first person of the week. Duncan is a resident of Ankh Morpor, and according to Carrot, the worst thief in Ankh Morpork. He's also the best informant, though, since it's all a game designed to get him a night in a warm cell and a hot meal. "It wasn't the Der Brys gang which knocked over Portin's warehouse. It was me!" Thank you for your inadvertent public service, Mr. Duncan-- as Carrot might put it. Be the first to email us at our new address: www.medievalgnome@gmail...

Interesting Times (PCv2n5)

August 16, 2021 22:00 - 2 minutes - 2.05 MB

Here it is—a structured Pratchips format: (!) Mondays—a Discworld book Tuesdays—a Discworld Person (aka character) Wednesdays—a Discworld place (aka place) Thursdays—a Discworld thing (oh baby this one covers a lot of ground) Today’s book, selected by random number generation, is Interesting Times. Check it out. And let me know how you like this format vis-à-vis the previous freeform approach.  You can reach me at [email protected].  The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How ...

Interesting Times

August 16, 2021 22:00 - 2 minutes - 2.05 MB

Here it is—a structured Pratchips format: (!) Mondays—a Discworld book Tuesdays—a Discworld Person (aka character) Wednesdays—a Discworld place (aka place) Thursdays—a Discworld thing (oh baby this one covers a lot of ground) Today’s book, selected by random number generation, is Interesting Times. Check it out. And let me know how you like this format vis-à-vis the previous freeform approach.  You can reach me at [email protected].  The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How ...

Wizards and Witches

August 13, 2021 22:00 - 35 minutes - 24.3 MB

This week we consider wizardry and witchcraft on the Disc. Specifically, we look at how they are portrayed over time in the series. Wizards and wizardry begin and end as buffoonish. They are comic relief. Witchcraft, on the other hand, is serious business, and we learn more and more about this as time goes on. Ultimately, we realize that, at least day-to-day, wizardry is superfluous, and witchcraft important, and often vital to the lives of the inhabitants of the Discworld.  Remember that ...

Wizards and Witches (S10E5)

August 13, 2021 22:00 - 35 minutes - 24.3 MB

This week we consider wizardry and witchcraft on the Disc. Specifically, we look at how they are portrayed over time in the series. Wizards and wizardry begin and end as buffoonish. They are comic relief. Witchcraft, on the other hand, is serious business, and we learn more and more about this as time goes on. Ultimately, we realize that, at least day-to-day, wizardry is superfluous, and witchcraft important, and often vital to the lives of the inhabitants of the Discworld.  Remember that ...

Wizards and Witches (Season 10 episode 6)

August 13, 2021 22:00 - 35 minutes - 24.3 MB

This week we consider wizardry and witchcraft on the Disc. Specifically, we look at how they are portrayed over time in the series. Wizards and wizardry begin and end as buffoonish. They are comic relief. Witchcraft, on the other hand, is serious business, and we learn more and more about this as time goes on. Ultimately, we realize that, at least day-to-day, wizardry is superfluous, and witchcraft important, and often vital to the lives of the inhabitants of the Discworld.  Remember that ...

Wit and Wisdom

August 12, 2021 22:00 - 2 minutes - 2.08 MB

Sometimes you just need to hear from the master. You can reach me at [email protected]. I’d love to hear from you! The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go    

Wit and Wisdom (PCv2n4)

August 12, 2021 22:00 - 2 minutes - 2.08 MB

Sometimes you just need to hear from the master. You can reach me at [email protected]. I’d love to hear from you! The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go    

Hex and Gaspode

August 11, 2021 23:00 - 3 minutes - 2.11 MB

Thinking engine, thinking brain dog. Huh.    You can reach me at [email protected]. I’d love to hear from you! The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go  

Hex and Gaspode (PCv2n3)

August 11, 2021 23:00 - 3 minutes - 2.11 MB

Thinking engine, thinking brain dog. Huh.    You can reach me at [email protected]. I’d love to hear from you! The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go  

Melon! Melon! Out of Cheese Error! (PCv2n2)

August 10, 2021 22:00 - 2 minutes - 2.07 MB

When it comes to technomancy, you can't beat Hex! You can reach me at [email protected]. I’d love to hear from you! The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go  

Melon! Melon! Out of Cheese Error!

August 10, 2021 22:00 - 2 minutes - 2.07 MB

When it comes to technomancy, you can't beat Hex! You can reach me at [email protected]. I’d love to hear from you! The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go  

Earworms and Frying Pans (PCv2n1)

August 09, 2021 20:00 - 2 minutes - 2.07 MB

Not a very appetizing combination, certainly. But misery loves company, so I will tell you about earworms, with the flimsy excuse that I get Disworld-line earworms. This one, currently, is bedeviling me: "Jimmy Tropes is in trouble, though. He's up a tree in Hyde Park." Also a few words about Tiffany Aching's frying pan, and a few more words about Hex. Hey, I've only got 180 seconds!  [email protected]

Earworms and Frying Pans

August 09, 2021 20:00 - 2 minutes - 2.07 MB

Not a very appetizing combination, certainly. But misery loves company, so I will tell you about earworms, with the flimsy excuse that I get Disworld-line earworms. This one, currently, is bedeviling me: "Jimmy Tropes is in trouble, though. He's up a tree in Hyde Park." Also a few words about Tiffany Aching's frying pan, and a few more words about Hex. Hey, I've only got 180 seconds!  [email protected]

Technology, by Request (Season 10 episode 5)

August 06, 2021 21:00 - 28 minutes - 19.8 MB

Bethany is a listener, Patreon subscriber, and member of our Discord community (thanks, Bethany!) who recently requested/suggested a show about how technology affects the Disc’s inhabitants. And yes, it affects them; i.e. it has an effect on them. Affect/effect is a tricky one. (Chorus: Get on with it!!!) So, here it is. From Twoflower’s iconograph to Dick Simnel’s Iron Girder, a look at how the Disc responded to, and was affected by technology over the course of the books.  Remember, you ...

Technology, by Request (S10E4)

August 06, 2021 21:00 - 28 minutes - 19.8 MB

Bethany is a listener, Patreon subscriber, and member of our Discord community (thanks, Bethany!) who recently requested/suggested a show about how technology affects the Disc’s inhabitants. And yes, it affects them; i.e. it has an effect on them. Affect/effect is a tricky one. (Chorus: Get on with it!!!) So, here it is. From Twoflower’s iconograph to Dick Simnel’s Iron Girder, a look at how the Disc responded to, and was affected by technology over the course of the books.  Remember, you ...

Technology, by Request

August 06, 2021 21:00 - 28 minutes - 19.8 MB

Bethany is a listener, Patreon subscriber, and member of our Discord community (thanks, Bethany!) who recently requested/suggested a show about how technology affects the Disc’s inhabitants. And yes, it affects them; i.e. it has an effect on them. Affect/effect is a tricky one. (Chorus: Get on with it!!!) So, here it is. From Twoflower’s iconograph to Dick Simnel’s Iron Girder, a look at how the Disc responded to, and was affected by technology over the course of the books.  Remember, you ...

Creator(s)

August 05, 2021 20:00 - 3 minutes - 2.08 MB

There apparently is an anthropomorphic personification of the Creator of the Disc. He’s a little old man who carries the universe around in a sack. Maybe. Rincewind meets him twice, and he’s a bit different the second time. But then, who isn’t? You can reach me at [email protected]. I’d love to hear from you! The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go

Creator(s) (PCv1n20)

August 05, 2021 20:00 - 3 minutes - 2.08 MB

There apparently is an anthropomorphic personification of the Creator of the Disc. He’s a little old man who carries the universe around in a sack. Maybe. Rincewind meets him twice, and he’s a bit different the second time. But then, who isn’t? You can reach me at [email protected]. I’d love to hear from you! The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go

Tak Wrote (PCv1n19)

August 04, 2021 21:00 - 2 minutes - 2.08 MB

In the beginning, say the dwarfs, Tak wrote the world. He then wrote the dwarfs. Millenia later it became known throughout dwarfdom that Tak also wrote the trolls. This put an end to what then became recognized as a fratricidal vendetta… at least for the time being.  You can reach me at [email protected]. I’d love to hear from you! The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go  

Tak Wrote

August 04, 2021 21:00 - 2 minutes - 2.08 MB

In the beginning, say the dwarfs, Tak wrote the world. He then wrote the dwarfs. Millenia later it became known throughout dwarfdom that Tak also wrote the trolls. This put an end to what then became recognized as a fratricidal vendetta… at least for the time being.  You can reach me at [email protected]. I’d love to hear from you! The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go  

The Mage Wars

August 03, 2021 20:00 - 3 minutes - 2.09 MB

The Disc has its own, of course. In our very brief overview, we’ll take a look at a few of them over the next few days, beginning with The Mage Wars. You can reach me at [email protected]. I’d love to hear from you! The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go

The Mage Wars (PCv1n18)

August 03, 2021 20:00 - 3 minutes - 2.09 MB

The Disc has its own, of course. In our very brief overview, we’ll take a look at a few of them over the next few days, beginning with The Mage Wars. You can reach me at [email protected]. I’d love to hear from you! The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go

Continental Drift (PCn1v17)

August 03, 2021 00:00 - 3 minutes - 2.13 MB

Only on the Disc would one expect to find cruel and unusual geography. And it all starts with the continents. You can reach me at [email protected]. I’d love to hear from you! The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go

Continental Drift

August 03, 2021 00:00 - 3 minutes - 2.13 MB

Only on the Disc would one expect to find cruel and unusual geography. And it all starts with the continents. You can reach me at [email protected]. I’d love to hear from you! The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go

Time, for a Birthday Present (Bonus)

August 01, 2021 19:00 - 21 minutes - 14.5 MB

I've always liked the hobbit tradition of giving gifts to others on one's birthday. Here is my birthday gift to you: a meditation on time, and time travel, a la Sir Terry Pratchett. I hope you enjoy it.  Randy GNU Terry Pratchett The Turtle Moves Mind How You Go 

Time, for a Birthday Present

August 01, 2021 19:00 - 21 minutes - 14.5 MB

I've always liked the hobbit tradition of giving gifts to others on one's birthday. Here is my birthday gift to you: a meditation on time, and time travel, a la Sir Terry Pratchett. I hope you enjoy it.  Randy GNU Terry Pratchett The Turtle Moves Mind How You Go 

Time, for a Birthday Present (Season 10 episode 4)

August 01, 2021 19:00 - 21 minutes - 14.5 MB

I've always liked the hobbit tradition of giving gifts to others on one's birthday. Here is my birthday gift to you: a meditation on time, and time travel, a la Sir Terry Pratchett. I hope you enjoy it.  Randy GNU Terry Pratchett The Turtle Moves Mind How You Go 

Water, Water Everywhere

July 28, 2021 22:00 - 2 minutes - 2.05 MB

A brief look at the Disc’s more famous, or infamous bodies of water.   If you’re burning with curiosity, check out our new website at www.podpage.com/witches-and-wizards-portal.   It’s a work in progress, but you can get a sneak peek—and send some feedback about it via the page—either a message or a voicemail.  The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go

Water, Water Everywhere (PCv1n7)

July 28, 2021 22:00 - 2 minutes - 2.05 MB

A brief look at the Disc’s more famous, or infamous bodies of water.   If you’re burning with curiosity, check out our new website at www.podpage.com/witches-and-wizards-portal.   It’s a work in progress, but you can get a sneak peek—and send some feedback about it via the page—either a message or a voicemail.  The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go

Directions

July 27, 2021 19:00 - 2 minutes - 2.04 MB

A 3-minute primer on directions, Discworld style.    I’m excited to tease a new website for the show, and another (maybe easier) way for you to support Medieval Gnome Productions. Maybe ways. Stay tuned!   The Turtle Moves  GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go

Directions (PCv1n6)

July 27, 2021 19:00 - 2 minutes - 2.04 MB

A 3-minute primer on directions, Discworld style.    I’m excited to tease a new website for the show, and another (maybe easier) way for you to support Medieval Gnome Productions. Maybe ways. Stay tuned!   The Turtle Moves  GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go

Mapping a Sense of Humor (PCv1n5)

July 26, 2021 21:00 - 3 minutes - 2.1 MB

Pratchips turns to the Discworld Atlas today, and especially to the included map, as we begin a week of jography lessons. That’ll be two carrots and one egg, please.

Mapping a Sense of Humor

July 26, 2021 21:00 - 3 minutes - 2.1 MB

Pratchips turns to the Discworld Atlas today, and especially to the included map, as we begin a week of jography lessons. That’ll be two carrots and one egg, please.

Vetinari

July 22, 2021 22:00 - 2 minutes - 2.07 MB

Today we gain a greater understanding of the problem posed by the arrival of a thousand new golems in Ankh-Morpork, and then hear of Lord Vetinari’s simple, elegant solution. Because he is Lord Vetinari. Because he loves doing puzzles. Because he sees ruling Ankh-Morpork as one great, ongoing puzzle.  You can reach me at [email protected]. I’d love to hear from you! The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go

Vetinari (PCv1n4)

July 22, 2021 22:00 - 2 minutes - 2.07 MB

Today we gain a greater understanding of the problem posed by the arrival of a thousand new golems in Ankh-Morpork, and then hear of Lord Vetinari’s simple, elegant solution. Because he is Lord Vetinari. Because he loves doing puzzles. Because he sees ruling Ankh-Morpork as one great, ongoing puzzle.  You can reach me at [email protected]. I’d love to hear from you! The Turtle Moves GNU Terry Pratchett Mind How You Go

Gladys

July 21, 2021 18:00 - 3 minutes - 2.13 MB

Today we consider the golem who becomes Gladys, arbitrarily made female and given a dress to wear. Gladys goes from that artificial gender identification to a golem who considers herself feminine, mostly because of the books the counter girls in the post office, where Gladys works, give her to read.           Gladys, by the end of Making Money, has become a fully liberated woman, in every sense of the word.           That begs the question: what happens when the thousand golems with no che...

Gladys (PCv1n3)

July 21, 2021 18:00 - 3 minutes - 2.13 MB

Today we consider the golem who becomes Gladys, arbitrarily made female and given a dress to wear. Gladys goes from that artificial gender identification to a golem who considers herself feminine, mostly because of the books the counter girls in the post office, where Gladys works, give her to read.           Gladys, by the end of Making Money, has become a fully liberated woman, in every sense of the word.           That begs the question: what happens when the thousand golems with no che...

Dorfl (PCv1n2)

July 21, 2021 00:00 - 2 minutes - 2.07 MB

Have you ever thought about what might happen if the Golem Trust decided to buy the freedom of the 1,000 Umnian golems Adora Belle Dearheart brought to Ankh-Morpork? I bet somebody has. 

Dorfl

July 21, 2021 00:00 - 2 minutes - 2.07 MB

Have you ever thought about what might happen if the Golem Trust decided to buy the freedom of the 1,000 Umnian golems Adora Belle Dearheart brought to Ankh-Morpork? I bet somebody has.