EP4 - How to cultivate motivation

EP4 - How to cultivate motivation

[00:00:00] Welcome to another episode of moments of wisdom with Brett Williams. I really appreciate you all for being here and hopefully you're getting some good value out of the previous podcasts. Now, today, I want to talk about motivation and the reason why I want to talk about this one is because this morning I caught up with a mate of mine and we're having a conversation about some of the challenges that he's been facing.

[00:00:20] Some of the desires that he's wanting to get into different areas of, uh, I guess, online business and that sort of thing. And. Um, and I guess the biggest thing that really showed out for me there is the idea of around motivation and, and being motivated to actually take action. And I was sharing with him that, um, you know, my, where I am right now on my journey, I'm so far committed within, uh, the coaching within, within all the businesses.

[00:00:45] Just, I can't stop now. Like the motivation itself there is, is gathered momentum, but. I was emphasizing with where he was at, because I remember when I was at that place of, um, you know, wanting to get started kind of in a limbo place of wanting to change my reality, but at the same time, not really knowing where to start.

[00:01:05] Cause let's be honest in this world. In this day and age, there is so many different opportunities and options out there as to, you know, this one sounds exciting. You know, now maybe I'll do this. Um, Whether it's starting your own coaching business, whether it's going down the affiliate marketing route, whether it's going into network marketing, e-commerce all of these things.

[00:01:26] I've got such a, um, you know, shiny object syndrome about them. Um, And if you're unsure as to where to actually start, it can create a bit of overwhelm. And obviously when you get into that overwhelm stage, you're not going to do anything. And perhaps, maybe you're experiencing this right now, or perhaps you have been experiencing it, or perhaps you even know friends who are experiencing it.

[00:01:47] And that's the thing there when it comes to, uh, obviously not actually taking action in life and, you know, That can start to create this identity and belief about yourself. That you're a procrastinator that you're not, not good at anything and all of this, but yet when it comes back to being able to create the self belief, to be able to take an action.

[00:02:07] One of the things that I always talk about to my clients is look back in your past and think about one or two times, or if you've got a couple more, but you know, at least one or two times that. When you actually committed to something that you actually were able to achieve it. And the reason why I say that is because when it comes to the lack of action, there is a high chance that your caught up in the other belief that says, you know what, I'm going to fail.

[00:02:30] I'm no good at this. I've tried these things in the past and got nowhere and all of that. And that is the story that is ultimately running your actions right in this moment. And so obviously that's not going to support you for taking any action. Now it does come back to having a real conversation with yourself.

[00:02:46] And the biggest part there is being honest and saying, well, am I actually committed? Am I actually really committing to, and at the end of the day, We do have the ability to be able to choose something, give it a good go for a couple of months or thereabouts and, you know, and then go, you know what? This doesn't actually resonate for me.

[00:03:05] This isn't the right thing. Okay, cool. Let's try something else. And I think in there with the combination of the belief that you're going to fail at something, and of course you're going to live out that reality if you're not actually even committed to it. And if you just kind of liking it, you just kind of want to do it.

[00:03:20] Well then of course you are going to create that reality, which says. I'm a failure. I'm not good at things. And then just, just going to validate yourself and all of the social circles around you, who may have otherwise been trying to pull you back down into the, into the fold, because you've expressed that you wanted to do something different.

[00:03:37] And so you're going to prove all of them wrong. And then at the end of the day, all that does is resubmit the belief in the identity for yourself. That it doesn't matter what I try. It's never going to work. And so. It really is about having that real conversation with yourself. Like, am I actually doing this 100%?

[00:03:55] Because when you do have that evidence that you, I could look back upon that says, okay, there's a couple of things that you've done that you're able to actually say, well, I actually fully committed to those and I got the results for me personally. There's a couple of things that I look at. Now going through a primary school, high school, I was never really academic, actually, not even saying never really.

[00:04:16] I wasn't that academic. I was a C D student, a couple of F's or E's or whatever they were called, um, in, I guess the main core subjects maths I was okay. At pretty good at actually. But as far as English science and, and all of those sorts of things, I was absolutely hopeless at, um, and languages and all of that, which, um, for me, you know, I was more the sports, the woodwork, the metal work, automotive workshop, all of that side of things like that was where I really excelled.

[00:04:45] And so for me, after going through high school, I didn't know what I wanted to become. I didn't know what industry that I wanted to get into and because my father was a. Well previously at the time he had been a draftsman in the mining industry and I was all right at tech drawing. I was pretty many mechanically minded.

[00:05:03] So I thought, you know what, okay, I'm going to give this a go. Now, fast forward a couple of years, I got a traineeship with a engineering company. And then after doing my TAFE advanced diploma, I decided to go and do my engineering degree. And so I started my mechanical engineering degree here at Curtin university in Perth.

[00:05:21] And I. I failed. I failed maths multiple times. And for me that was only some mentoring in the belief that I'm no good at this. And so I found the strength and I made the commitment to myself, which I stuck to that a couple of years later, I was going to. Go for it again. And I was going to this time changed the way that I was doing it.

[00:05:45] I was going to do it externally, remotely so that I had more time to be able to focus on it. But I was also going to start back from scratch because when I got into the engineering, um, degree at Curtin, I had some credits from the TAFE. So it meant that I was kind of like second year, we're doing like one or two first year subjects.

[00:06:04] But this time around, I actually decided to go back to Deakin university in Melbourne and I was doing it via correspondence. Now, again, coming back to what I was saying, I was not a high achiever when it comes to school, give me the, you know, the sporting subjects or like the, all of that other stuff. Yeah, I was good at, um, And so what I actually decided to do when it came to the engineering degree, the second time around is I decided to commit, I literally gave it my all I was studying.

[00:06:36] I was committed to it. I was doing all the things that I needed to do in order to be able to achieve. And on the other side of that, after that first year, I ended up walking away with a distinction average. Now. And distinction average in university degree is about 75% plus as an overall Mark on all of the units.

[00:06:55] And for me, that was a real, real game changer when it came to my identity and belief about myself that said that I was no good at these things. And so that is one of the things that I always look back on and I guess have a bit of a check in with myself and it's like, okay, if I'm not getting the results in life right now, Brett, are you really actually going forward?

[00:07:15] Are you really actually committed to it? And I think about how I was committed to that one thing, and I realized that, you know, half the time I'm kind of like dangling my toe in the water. I'm not fully in like I'm not fully going for it. And so in that moment, I'll check in with myself and go, well, of course you're not getting the results because you're not committed.

[00:07:34] Okay. So what would be the possible outcome if I was actually to commit to this? Well, There's a high chance that I would actually get the results that I'm looking for. Okay, cool. So it's time to actually commit. And so another one that I look at as far as a past example that I look upon, uh, to remind myself that when I commit I achieve Dave is a couple of years ago, 2014, I decided to do a bodybuilding competition.

[00:07:59] Now that was fueled initially by a, uh, an unhealthy relationship breakdown and break up. And I. Uh, I wanted to kind of have a moment with, you know, getting back on my ex in some ways and being in the best possible shape that I could possibly be. And, uh, whilst the, that fuel did not last all of the competition prep time, it was what got me started initially.

[00:08:22] And so, uh, either way. I ended up finding another reason as to why I was doing it. And I was doing it for myself to get out of my comfort zone and put myself in a place where was quite literally, you're putting yourself in a very vulnerable state in place. And the whole focus of it is for people to judge you and tell you what you're not doing.

[00:08:42] Right. And so for me, I was like, okay, that's a place that's going to build character. I'm going to do it. And so I look at that and I look at what I achieved whilst I never. Placed anywhere when it came to the top five metals or anything like that in my competition, I still was there. I still walked up on stage and I was in pretty damn good shape.

[00:09:01] And I was so super proud of the commitment that I put to it. And ultimately, because I committed, I got the results. And so, you know, I talk about it at the start, you know, what are the two things that all like one thing at least that you can look upon and go, you know what? I actually put my effort into that and I got the result now.

[00:09:19] I'm sure. You've got something, you know, everybody has something, but there's also a high chance that maybe you've justified it as being a fluke or being lucky or, um, you know, somebody helped you out or something like that. And that's, they might be elements in some of that. But at the end of the day, the whole focus of all of this and everything that I want to share to be able to challenge your mindset and viewpoint is to.

[00:09:45] To allow you to find an empowering perspective of on all aspects in life. Because when you get an, a power and empowering perspective, then all of a sudden you can start taking control back of your life. And until then, you're just going to be constantly creating excuses for yourself since, as to why you not achieving the life that you're achieving.

[00:10:04] And ultimately you're going to be unhappy and. Let's be honest where he to have happiness, we're here to enjoy life. We're here to really embrace all of that. And so you have a choice and you have a choice as the way you view absolutely everything. And so I invite you to have a look into whatever the area is of life, whatever that experience was and see the empowering perspective that when you actually committed.

[00:10:28] To the activity, whatever it was, whether it was academic, whether it was sporting, whether it was a career choice or like a career progression, uh, whatever that was for yourself and actually acknowledge it. And remember it, like bookmark it in your memory to say, this is something that I can use as a tool to get leverage over myself every single time that I believe that I'm not good enough or I'm not achieving.

[00:10:52] And in those moments, ask yourself the questions. Am I actually fully committed to this? Or do I am. Or I'm, I'm more committed to the story of the idea of doing this. And when you can get clear between the two, then you can have that honest conversation with yourself and ultimately get that momentum, momentum, and motivation to get started.

[00:11:10] And so this is something that I do for myself now, because I'm so far committed within my, my direction. It's not as required, but there's still definitely only times when I'm trialing different things and new things like right now, for example, I'm in the process of hiring some assistants, I'm looking in the process of hiring a video editors, website designers, VA in that side of things, I've never hired somebody in my life.

[00:11:36] I've been a solo entrepreneur for all this time. And so now I'm like, okay, well, one thing that I know about myself is that I know how to figure it out. And no matter what comes up, I'll figure it out. And that also comes back to the example that I'm talking about here, knowing within myself, that when I actually fully commit and give it my focus.

[00:11:57] I will get the result. And I accept the fact that it might be a little bit messy. I accept the fact that I'm going to make some mistakes and learn from those and all of that aspect and being able to really work through it. And so I invite you to have a look into it for yourself. Like, are you more attached to the story about the idea of what you want to create in your life, or are you actually committed to actually creating it in your life?

[00:12:17] Because at the end of the day, one thing that I've experienced in the past is that it can be very easy to get. The emotional satisfaction by talking about what it is that you're going to do. But when it comes to actually taking action, then you kind of don't have that motivation anymore because, because you spoke about it with your friends in social circles, it's almost like.

[00:12:39] You've got the endorphin hit that says you've already achieved it because everybody's like, yeah, that'd be great. That'd be awesome. Like, yeah. Woo. You know, I cheering you on and all of that sort of thing. And then, so you've walked away. Hell holding, you're holding your head high. And now all of a sudden you've drained the tank of the desire to do it because you've spoken about it with friends and you've kind of got the endorphin hit.

[00:13:01] And so that can also lead to not taking action within your life, into what direction have you. That you're wanting to go. And so, you know, maybe I invite you as well, keep some of these things to yourself or. Be very selective as to who you actually share your, your thoughts with, perhaps share them with somebody who is going to hold you accountable.

[00:13:21] Like that's a different conversation. And that's one of the things that my mate knows. He knows that I can hold him accountable. And I know where he's, I said to him actually today, I'm like, I hope you're listening to what you're saying. Cause it's not me. You're trying to convince it's yourself. And so those are the sort of things that you're not going to get from friends and family who.

[00:13:40] Kind of not really that committed and don't understand the journey. And so, you know, are you listening to yourself and are you actually trying to convince yourself when you're telling your friends and family that this is what I want to do because at the end of the day, Honestly, they don't necessarily care.

[00:13:56] They might be interested. They might be excited for you, but they are too busy, worried about their own stuff and trying to survive in life or trying to, you know, make it in life for themselves then too. Um, You know, fully be committed to cheering you on. And so that's one of the things to be very mindful.

[00:14:13] And that's one of the reasons why over the last number of years, I think it was good. Couple of years back when I started on this journey, I was kind of declaring to the world that I'm going to take over the world and all of this side of things. And, um, you know, it really. It did two things. One, it gave me that endorphin hit.

[00:14:28] So I ultimately didn't do it. And ultimately sabotage myself with the other thing that I'd actually did as well. Was it actually created a, um, uh, I guess a reason for other people to shoot me down because I didn't have the evidence that said that I could achieve it. And so from that side of things, It was breaking down my confidence and self belief to actually be able to achieve it.

[00:14:49] So ultimately again, I sabotaged myself because it was like, well, what's the point of starting because of course I can't. And so couple of years back, I made the conscious decision to very literally stop telling people about my, my visions and being very mindful about. Telling who I tell and what detail that I tell them.

[00:15:08] And so now it's definitely getting to the point where, um, I can share a little bit more and people actually believe that it's going to happen because of the results that I've already gathered and that side of things. And so, um, But even still, even at this stage, I don't share too much about my focus or my, my visions.

[00:15:24] I definitely don't share it in detail, but, you know, I share it from a different place as well. Like I don't need somebody else to tell me how, how amazing it's going to be or to, to pump up my ego or anything like that in regards to achieving it all. I'm just sharing it cause I'm excited. Cause I know that I'm creating it as well.

[00:15:42] Whereas before. I was sharing it from the point of wanting somebody else to pretty much pump me up and tell me yes, you can do it. And so two very, very different places to be, to be communicating from and to be sharing that, that perspective on. And so, you know, it's really, really powerful for yourself to have that awareness and be able to understand, because at the end of the day, when it comes to motivation, it is an internal game.

[00:16:06] It is not an external thing. You can find motivation in external things, whether you're a family member, like if you've got kids partner or wife, husband, um, all of those runs responsibilities, you can absolutely find motivation externally to yourself, but you've also still got to find that motivation and reasoning within yourself to be able to get leverage on yourself, to take the action because.

[00:16:32] Otherwise, it can start to create resentment towards your family, even though it's an unspoken thing that you have against not against them, you have, uh, created in your mind that says I'm doing this for the family, because that's the way that you've created motivation in your own head. And that's the leverage that you've created on yourself.

[00:16:50] But then if the family doesn't show up in a way that is appreciative of the efforts that you're putting in, in the way that you want them to in that unspoken expectation way. Well then. It's going to create that resentment towards the family. It's going to start driving a wedge and you may not even be consciously aware that you're doing it.

[00:17:09] It's just showing up in the way that you're reacting and behaving towards the family or the family member and all of a sudden now, because you've used them as leverage to get motivation for yourself. They don't know anything about it. Yeah. All they know is that you're just showing up as being somebody who is rude, abrupt, short-tempered, whatever it might be yet.

[00:17:30] When it comes to getting leveraged within yourself, all of a sudden that's a completely different ballpark. All of a sudden, it doesn't matter what anybody else does around you. You can still show up to them 100%. Whereas at the same time you have the leverage on yourself because you're coming from more of a healthier place within yourself because you know that you can do it.

[00:17:49] Because you have the evidence that says, of course you can do it. And so that being said, You know, I hope for yourself that you got a lot of value out of this one. I know I dive through a lot of things. And again, as I said, I invite you to consider and look into your own life, to think of one or two things that you have as evidence that you can get over yourself that says when you.

[00:18:10] Actually focus on something that you can ultimately achieve. The result that you're actually wanting to have, because that in itself is one of the biggest things and the best things that you can do for yourself to be able to get started and start changing your life. So that being said, I appreciate you for tuning in to this episode of.

[00:18:29] Moments of wisdom with Brett Williams, the podcast. I think we're up to episode four here. So that being said, if you got value out of this one, let me know in the comments. If you've got also got value out of this one, then share it with somebody else that you believe will get value out of it as well. And that being said, I appreciate you for listening and I'll see you on the next episode.

[00:18:47] Cheers.