EP 5 - How happiness transforms your life

EP 5 - How happiness transforms your life

Transcript

[00:00:00] What's going on. It is Brett Williams here. And thank you so much for tuning into another episode here of moments of a wisdom with us, Brett Williams. Today, I want to talk about happiness. Um, and what does happiness outing ultimately mean to yourself? And I'm just sitting here this morning, just watching some YouTube videos and getting my day started and just thinking about a number of things.

[00:00:23] And today is actually a very, uh, Remarkable day for myself. And it's a very, it's going to be a very memorable day. And I guess that's where I was just sitting here. Just thinking about what makes me happy and what does happiness actually mean to myself. And before I get into that, let me just share my little bit of excitement.

[00:00:41] So today's the day that I have five new employees joining the team. Uh, finally shifting from being solo entrepreneur, to being, I guess, business owner and, um, the RP marketing brand is starting to build. So I'm super, super excited and I'm just super grateful and proud and happy about where my life is right now.

[00:01:01] And again, thinking about the contract, that's about where my life was some 12 months ago, if not, uh, probably the only, you know, six months ago. Um, but also at the same time, like looking over there, I guess the course of the last couple of years as well, and just thinking about, you know, What was different then that's different now.

[00:01:21] And ultimately it's coming back to happiness. Now, when it comes to, when I ask people most were with the coaching programs within a life with options or conscious brothers, either the part to be me program or the be the man program, you know, I ask what is it that you want to get out of it? This program at the end of the 12 weeks?

[00:01:39] And the men will say, Oh, well, it'll be happy. The women generally say, I want freedom. Ultimately, it's coming back to a higher level of happiness and you know, why aren't we happy in the moment? And I think one of it is, is just becoming so consumed by where we're at. What we believe is where we should be at.

[00:02:00] And that disconnect between the two. And ultimately what I found over the years is definitely the happiness side of things is really that acceptance of where you're at and being able to accept whether you and look disclaimer here, acceptance and liking are two very different things. You can accept where you're at and not like it.

[00:02:20] And that's actually a really healthy place to be because when you accept where you're at. And you don't like it. You can actually then go, okay. So what are the next steps that I need to take in order to be? I wouldn't change it and stop moving in the direction that I want. So that's a really or place to be.

[00:02:33] And yet, um, It's also the place that, you know, can start to lead towards that happiness and happiness for me is something that really shows up in slowing down and acknowledging where I'm at, what I've been doing and actually acknowledging myself for all of that. And happiness is really a kind of an arbitrary thing that most people are chasing.

[00:02:57] And look, sometimes it's wave it's, you know, some days I'm more happier, then I am others. But the thing is, is can you. Work through whatever's going on for you in that moment and step into a place of happiness. Now, the reason why I say this and in past episodes, I've talked about my fi my financial struggles and, uh, not having money for food and things like this.

[00:03:18] When I was in Bali over the last couple of years, and really confronting my biggest fear, which is the fear of being homeless. Now, when it came to those moments, one of the things that I knew is that I, I had to. Be able to be happy in my given situation. And that situation really sucked. I didn't like it, but I accepted it.

[00:03:43] And that situation was stressful. It was causing a lot of sleepless nights when it came to, you know, as I said, the fear of, you know, not having money for food. And that was a reality for me for a couple of times. And, um, whilst I had prepaid my rent, so I knew I had a place to stay. I didn't necessarily have money for food.

[00:04:02] And there was definitely a few meals that I went without, just because of that situation again. What I said in those episodes, I could have gone out to friends and family, but I knew I needed to confront it for myself, but. The reason why I say that is the biggest thing that I knew was in order for me to be able to change my current reality.

[00:04:19] At that point in time, I needed to understand how to be happy in that situation. And for me, the biggest thing that was holding me back, and perhaps this is something that you experienced as well, is that my happiness would dictate or would. Shift, depending on the amount of money in my bank account. And so for me, I went to a lot of them internal work to really understand, well, why is that?

[00:04:47] And why does my bank account or the number in my bank account have to dictate my level of happiness. And so. The motive behind this was because I knew that at the end of the day in the place that I was in, I wasn't going to be attracting the opportunities that were going to allow me to get out of that position.

[00:05:07] And so for me, maybe it was really, it was, you know, it was my back against the wall. This is the last option. This is what you have to do. It's, there's a quote. And I can't think of who says it at the moment. It's a do the best that you can until you realize that's not enough. And then do what you have to.

[00:05:23] And that was where I'd got to. I realized I'd been doing the best that I could up until that point, but I knew it wasn't what I had to, I actually do. And so in that moment, being able to then go, okay, so what is. Why is my emotions? Why is my happiness attached to the bank account? And then how can I actually detach the two and be happy within that moment?

[00:05:45] And ultimately it was just coming back to knowing who I am, and this is something that I teach in my programs. And whilst it's, you know, it's something that is really powerful in all areas of my life. For me over the years, money had always been something that was, uh, A relationship that was a work in progress.

[00:06:03] Let's put it that way. Um, ever since being 15 and convincing my dad to, uh, to lend me the other half of the money that I needed for my first push bike to my first car. And then all of a sudden one loan after the other. And then next minute is, you know, thousands and thousands of dollars in debt or, you know, hanging over me and that side of things.

[00:06:22] And so for me, the relationship with money was something that was a massive, massive, um, I guess dark hole that I needed to go down so that I can uncover and work out what was actually underneath it. And so in this, uh, journey, it really allowed me to be able to separate the two and separate my own happiness.

[00:06:42] And that number that was in the bank account and realize that at the end of the day, I needed to be happy first before that number in the bank account was actually going to change. And so being able to just really understand who I am and be able to show up in the best version of myself in any given moment led to one opportunity and then led to another opportunity and then led to the next opportunity and all of a sudden their finances and no longer an issue.

[00:07:08] And so one of the things that. You know, I wanted to just open up the conversation within your own mind for yourself is, you know, what dictates your happiness? What are you giving your power away when it comes to being happy? Um, perhaps right now, With all that's going on in the world, perhaps it is also finances as well.

[00:07:29] And I get it. And when the bank account is low, it really limits your options. It really limits your abilities to be able to do things. And that does have an impact emotionally, you know, you can't deny it and. You can't deny that, uh, for some time that it's, it's been something that's possibly held you back and kept you in that, that cycle.

[00:07:51] And to some degree you may also be ha you know, addicted to unconsciously addicted to pain of the cycle. And I knew that there was a degree of it for myself, and I realized that I needed to really break that story and what I'm talking about there, cause that might've come across very confronting is the fact that.

[00:08:11] In some ways we all have a story. In some ways we all have a victim story and in some ways, so way for us to be able to get the love, attention and connection that we otherwise don't get, or a craving in that mode. Um, and so for me, what I knew is part of my victim story was the fact that I kept myself financially broke because it was the only way.

[00:08:33] And only time that I got any, any appreciation or, uh, acknowledgement or. Connection with my father, because my dad wasn't able to emotionally connect with me. He just wasn't, he's just not that guy. He's just not attached to his emotions. He's not in tune with them and it's just not his space and he's not going to change because he's been who he is for so long.

[00:08:54] Um, and that's okay. And I need to accept that. And for me, it was a case of, I realized the unhealthy. A attachment to keeping my find out finances, uh, limited. So that I, at times reached out to him and actually said, Hey dad, can you help me out such and such? And in those moments, that was when there was no judgment.

[00:09:14] That was when there was like, yeah, Brett, I can help you out. You know, I'm here for you and all that sort of thing, which is what I ultimately was craving as a kid. You know, I don't need the finances. I just need to know that you're there for me. Um, But, you know, it is what it is. And yeah, what I realized is I needed to work through that relationship within myself and really uncover, um, you know, The pain that it was creating for myself because it wasn't a healthy thing.

[00:09:40] And for me, that was part of it, which was just validating my beliefs about myself and the belief that I felt about who I was within society and all of this sort of thing. And, you know, perhaps it's in there for yourself, perhaps you're keeping yourself financially broke because in some ways it allows you to be able to fit into the friend circles that's around you, or perhaps it allows you to fit into the.

[00:10:02] The story of the mode of everybody else that thinks about you and whatever it is, the end of the day. Yeah. It doesn't help you. It doesn't serve you. And at the same time, it's really around being able to understand that for yourself and then starting to be able to be happy independent of it, and really start to detach from this story.

[00:10:18] And happiness really is I think the big key to it, because the reason for that is, as I said before, I knew and evidence has shown me, is that, that at the end of the day, Unless you're showing up in life happy. You're not actually going to get the opportunities that is actually going to really change your life.

[00:10:39] And that was one of the biggest things that I knew back then. I knew that, okay, this journey was going to play out the way it's going to play out. I trusted in myself to be able to get through it. And I trusted in myself to really just be happy, no matter what. And the end of the day, you know, your bank account, doesn't, it's more of a mirror of who you are and how you're showing up.

[00:10:59] And so if you're constantly showing up as, you know, the world's against me and all of this side of things, well then your bank, account's probably going to be pretty empty. And there was a part of me that was a little bit like that. Part of me was going through that journey of, you know, this is tough, this is hard.

[00:11:12] I can't do this. Um, but the thing is, is also being able to really challenge the viewpoint on your obvious self, on for yourself, with the evidence of people around you. And so, you know, if it's possible for one person, it's possible for you as well, you just need to figure out what is their belief and what is their.

[00:11:28] Uh, knowledge and wisdom when it comes to that particular thing in life. And so, uh, happiness is, is really a place of, uh, inner peace that allows you to be able to detach from absolutely everything around you and, and ultimately not be impacted. By the world around you so that you're able to be able to show up as the best version of yourself.

[00:11:48] And realistically, that's what, as I said, that's what, you know, the men and women in my coaching programs, that's what they're striving for. And the reason for that is because for so long, their identity and their, their value and their belief themselves has been so attached to the world around them. And whilst you're attached to the world around you, you're at the, at the mercy of the world around you.

[00:12:11] You know, it's like, if, uh, if everybody's happy around me, well then cool. I'll be happy. But if everybody sat around me, well, then I'm going to be sad too. And that's just not a healthy way to live. You've got to be, yeah. Find that place within yourself to be able to self regulate your own emotions, your own happiness, your own mindset, your own.

[00:12:27] Stability within, you know, this world so that you can create what it is that you actually want to create. And that's, that's where that, that idea of, you know, being able to really have peace within side so that you can find that happiness with insight is a really, really key, powerful thing because the end of the day, that's part of the seeds to getting the life that you actually deeply desire.

[00:12:47] And so I hope that, uh, something in here has sparked a bit of a thought within yourself. I, um, I appreciate you for tuning in, and if you do like this podcast and the direction that I'm going with it, and, uh, if you're listening on Apple podcast or any of the other podcasts where you can rate it or leave a comment, then give me the five stars and also leave me a comment down below as well, so that I can see that and, and know that I'm on track.

[00:13:10] And at the end of the day, the focus of this podcast is really just to share some insights and thoughts and stories that I've never showed before. So I appreciate you for tuning in, and I wish you an amazing day.