How to Glow: The Jewish Woman's Marriage Boost
217 episodes - English - Latest episode: 6 months ago - ★★★★★ - 143 ratingsThe podcast where we get real about building the marriage of your dreams. Marriage coach Kayla Levin takes married Jewish women from surviving and overwhelmed to thriving and connected through practical tips, real life inspiration and more than a little self awareness along the way.
Whether you are newly married, considering marriage, or have been married for years, I will share with you a powerful framework to help you get the most enjoyment and fulfillment from your relationships--and ultimately, your own growth.
Find out more & join to get live coaching at https://kaylalevin.com
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Episodes
Ep. 155 - Living The Dream - Summer Series Replay
July 24, 2022 18:06 - 29 minutes - 27.7 MBEver notice that the things that cause you the most stress are sometimes the exact thing you most wanted? Once upon a time we only dreamed of getting to know and understand our husbands better, have children, or land that exact job. And once we have them, it's so easy to forget and to allow those same things to overwhelm us and stress us out. It's such a simple re-frame, but it can feel life changing when you need it. Make sure to listen this week to hear how to apply this in your life. Can...
Ep. 154 - Your Invisible Cape - Summer Series Replay
July 17, 2022 19:57 - 21 minutes - 20.2 MBReady for a tool that will make you feel like an undercover superhero? The Invisible Cape is THE magic trick to pull you out of the keeping-up-with-the-Cohens mentality. Because we ALL have our areas where we feel compelled to compete. This tool is one of my longtime listeners' and current clients' favorites--so I know you'll love it. And if you've heard it before, we can all use a refresh. Ready to take this work deeper? Doors open at the end of the month for my monthly membership coachi...
Ep. 153 - The Dreaded Housework - Summer Series Replay
July 10, 2022 18:18 - 53 minutes - 49.7 MBThis week I'm sharing our family's news which is why I've been MIA so far this summer. I'm also beginning our summer series where we'll be bringing back some of our listeners' most favorite episodes. This week is The Dreaded Housework--how can we use coaching concepts to improve our relationship with our more mundane parts of life? This was originally a two-part episode--we are including both in this week's replay. Sources from this episode: Keys to the Kingdom - How men change over time ...
Ep. 152 - Update & Replay of Illana Kendal - Choosing Up!
June 26, 2022 18:49 - 35 minutes - 33 MBThis week we kick off our July How to Glow Take-over with Illana Kendal, author of Choosing Up. Enjoy this episode replay and don't miss registration in the coming days to get into the community for July. Register Here Enjoy
Ep. 152 - Update & Replay of Ilana Kendal - Choosing Up!
June 26, 2022 18:49 - 36 minutes - 34 MBThis week we kick off our July How to Glow Take-over with Ilana Kendal, author of Choosing Up. Enjoy this episode replay and don't miss registration in the coming days to get into the community for July. Register Here Enjoy
Ep 151 - Goals vs. Decisions
May 29, 2022 13:02 - 15 minutes - 20.9 MBIf you've been struggling to stay on track with a decision you made, this episode is for you. So often, we make decisions when what we should be making are goals. What's the difference? A decision is one-and-done. A goal is a process. If you think you're making a decision but you really need a goal, you'll end up weakening your faith in yourself and creating a lot of extra frustration. If you set a goal that could easily just be a decision, you're spinning your wheels on work you don't ne...
Ep. 150 - A Positive Money Mindset with Yael Trusch
May 15, 2022 19:59 - 33 minutes - 46.3 MBI'm so excited to have Yael Trusch, financial expert and Torah teacher, on this week to discuss our thoughts about money. How do we not get too wrapped up in money? What if our financial situation is keeping us from being happy? Can you be wealthy AND holy? What does that look like? I know you'll love this conversation--can't wait to hear your thoughts. AND Yael will be our guest coach inside of How to Glow in June so you can learn more from her by signing up for How to Glow at kaylalev...
Ep. 149 - Giving Feels Amazing
May 01, 2022 21:07 - 13 minutes - 18 MBIf you've found yourself saying "yes" to too many things simply because it's so hard to say "no"... whether because you hate to disappoint others or you want to be nice or you just can't stand the awkward moment.. this week's podcast is for you. I want to show you what's on the other side of learning how to say no. What's on the other side is true giving. When you are willing and able to say "no" when someone asks you to do something you really don't want to or is outside your comfort zone...
Ep. 148 - Are We Responsible for Each Other's Feelings?
April 26, 2022 09:04 - 23 minutes - 32.2 MBToday I want to talk to you about the idea of how we relate to one another's feelings and how that relates to the idea that our own thoughts create our feelings. Specifically, we're going to take this into our marriages: "I want to be happy" turns into "I need my husband to do xyz so I will be happy" "I want my husband to be happy" becomes "I'm responsible to do everything he says will make him happy" On the other end of the spectrum, we could go too far-- taking NO responsibility for ou...
Ep. 147 - A Better Relationship with Your Mother-in-Law with Rachel Glasser
April 10, 2022 20:15 - 45 minutes - 62.6 MBRachel Glasser kept seeing comments on the Frum Girl Problems Facebook group about mother-in-law dynamics that were directly addressed in the research she had done about this relationship, so she decided to share her findings. I saw her post and immediately invited her onto the podcast. I loved our conversation. Having gone through all the major studies about in-law relationships in the last sixty years, Rachel has so much to share about the most common pitfalls in these relationships, the ...
Ep. 146 - The Terrain of Your Brain
April 03, 2022 19:49 - 19 minutes - 26.5 MBHas your brain felt noisy lately? I noticed a tendency to reach for a podcast or shiur when I had a lot on my mind and some housework that needed to get done. And when I paid attention, I found (probably not surprisingly) that once the podcast was over, my brain felt just as noisy as before. Sometimes more so. So I've adopted a check-in with myself: If my brain is noisy, what I need is silence. If my brain feels calm, I might want to listen to something. (Or I might just want to enjoy t...
Ep. 145 - How to Be a Smarter Couple - Interview with Rabbi Ben Tzion Shafier
March 27, 2022 20:49 - 40 minutes - 55.7 MBI am so excited to bring you this interview with Rabbi Ben Tzion Shafier, founder of TheShmuz.com and author of the new book, 10 Really Dumb Mistakes that Very Smart Couples Make. We dove into a really interesting discussion about how men and women communicate differently, how we perceive and give criticism differently, and how changing our approach can have a powerful impact on our marriages. Referenced in this episode: Check out Rabbi Shafier's book here To learn more about TheShmuz.com
Ep. 144 - Just One of Those Days
March 22, 2022 21:37 - 8 minutes - 11.3 MBSometimes it's not about coaching yourself, it's about acceptance. It's so easy to fall for the myth that we're supposed to always feel good. Ironically, thinking we're always supposed to feel good... feels terrible. It creates so much resistance. Today I'm sharing one of my "one of those days" days. And I know you have them, too. Here's how we can allow them, which actually allows us to tap into a deeper level of our own truth and helps us move past and through so much more easily.
Ep. 143 - Purim Thoughts
March 13, 2022 20:04 - 9 minutes - 9.26 MBI love Purim + Thought Work! So many women struggle on Purim. It's normal-- but it's not necessary. Tune in to hear how you can make a thought-plan for Purim to make it a day more meaningful and enjoyable (yes even with the wildness, the mess, the over-sugared kids, and the vomiting husband)! Want to join us next month? We'd love to have you in our community! kaylalevin.com/coaching to get on the wait list!
Ep. 142 - Rest vs Self Care
March 07, 2022 20:14 - 29 minutes - 40.1 MBPursuing happiness tends to make it even more elusive. Most of the women I know and work with know that sitting on the couch with bonbons when life is feeling a little unsatisfying is not going to do the trick. So in this ongoing conversation about self-care, I’m going to make another distinction that I think can help us. There are activities that make your life better.. and there’s rest. And both are critical. When we use “self-care-type activities” to FEEL BETTER (to feel happy, fulfi...
Ep. 141 - How to Stop Wasting Your Time
February 28, 2022 20:34 - 19 minutes - 26.4 MBIt's about to be one of the busiest seasons of the year and I want to give you a skill to get back a lot of your time. One of the main reasons we waste time is called buffering. Buffering is any time we engage in an activity and we lose out in the end--usually to avoid some negative emotion, whether that's loneliness, disconnection, boredom, anxiety... pick your poison :) Today I'll go over how to identify your buffers, why it's so crucial that you learn the skill of NOT buffering, and how...
Ep. 140 - We Don't Do Damsel In Distress
February 20, 2022 12:27 - 20 minutes - 28.2 MBThis week we are revisiting and going deeper on the whole idea of mashpia/mekabel AKA provider/receiver. What does this concept mean in the context of a Jewish marriage? What is the Jewish ideal for how a woman "receives"? What have we picked up from other cultures about what it means to be provided for, and what downsides does that bring? How can we strengthen ourselves without burning ourselves out or neglecting our own needs? Excited to share this episode with you. If you want to ta...
Ep. 139 - Real Requests Are Like Offers
February 13, 2022 10:05 - 12 minutes - 17.4 MBThis week I'm offering you a tool to help you get more clear on what you want from your marriage. So much of the time, we "hint" at what we want and really believe we've been clear. There are a few tools I teach to help you do a self-check of whether your communication was clear enough and what to do about the vulnerability we feel when we make a real, authentic request from our husband. Ready to take this work further? kaylalevin.com/coaching
Ep. 138 - When Your Husband is Sick
February 08, 2022 07:00 - 22 minutes - 30.7 MBThis episode is a long time coming! Many women struggle with feeling a REALLY strong negative reaction when their husband is sick--whether annoyance, judgement, resentment, frustration, even fear. This. Is. Normal. Even very lovely, wonderful, nurturing women struggle with this. Today I'm going to help you with what to do about it.
Ep 137 - When Your Husband is Critical of Your Looks or Weight (Listener Question)
January 30, 2022 09:05 - 23 minutes - 32.6 MBHOT TOPIC today, ladies. Whether this is relevant to you personally or not, I encourage you to listen for the tools I share in the context of this question. UPDATE: As of the posting of this episode, doors are open for How to Glow! GET IN TODAY for my best tools, live and written coaching, and the chance to hear other people get coached and grow from that! https://kaylalevin.com/coaching This week I'll be discussing... How to know when you need acceptance/thought work vs. a boundary Ho...
Ep 136 - When it Gets Really Hard
January 23, 2022 09:33 - 17 minutes - 24.5 MBThis week I want to offer some really practical solutions for when life--or your marriage--is getting really hard. When you should NOT be trying to do thought work How to get past "cliche" forms of self care to something that would really be helpful for you The role our lower brain plays in our well-being and how to deal with your nervous system Clarify what your signs are that you're spiraling How to use your brain to help you find solutions when you're feeling stuck Registration open...
Ep 135 - Listener Question: What Do I Do About My Stressed-Out Husband?
January 16, 2022 19:51 - 16 minutes - 22.9 MB"I had an idea for a podcast topic that I don't think you covered. It is actually relevant to current (Jewish) events lately. I want to know what to do when you or your spouse is having a crisis and is not dealing with it properly. Or if there is a crisis in the world that you or your spouse is taking very hard and not functioning as they normally do. If it is you, that is one thing but what do you do when it is your spouse? Especially when it comes at a busy/high stress/just wrong time?" T...
Ep 134 - Why You Might Need to Go on a Goals Detox
January 02, 2022 20:48 - 21 minutes - 29 MBNot to be contrary, but this week we'll be talking about why you might need to take a BREAK from setting goals. This episode is for you if you have a goal that's been lingering for a while that you just can't seem to work up the motivation to achieve. Listen to hear... Some "symptoms" that you are in need of a goals detox How tying your self worth to your accomplishments is actually making it harder for you to achieve your goals Why taking a break from having any goals will allow you t...
Ep 133 - Two Ways to Get More of What You Want
December 26, 2021 20:16 - 20 minutes - 27.7 MBWe talk a lot on here about getting our needs met, because that's one of the main questions I get as a marriage coach. Today I want to share two tools that will help you get more of what you want--whether specifically in your marriage or in your life as a whole. Listen this week to learn: The main reason you aren't pursuing what you want Clear, doable strategies to help you clarify what you really want in your life How taking pleasure in your life now creates more momentum for pursuing ...
Ep. 132 - Marriage Is Not Hard
December 19, 2021 10:06 - 10 minutes - 13.8 MBWhen we say "marriage is hard" we mean to encourage. We mean to empathize, to validate, to normalize the struggles that can so often happen in marriage. But I want you to know that there's a major negative impact of saying this so unquestioningly. Make sure you listen this week as I pull in thought work to understand why the phrase "marriage is hard" can be one of the biggest disservices we do for one another and for ourselves, and why I think we should all chuck this well-intentioned phr...
Ep. 131 - Physical Discomfort
December 12, 2021 11:23 - 26 minutes - 36 MBThis week I'm teaching you how to manage when you are TIRED. When you're up a lot at night, or have a very schleppy life-situation, or an extremely physically demanding job. Often we make the mistake of thinking that thought work doesn't apply to our physical experience. I've seen time and time again that this is not true. Our thoughts about our discomfort create the true bulk of our experience. Whatever your situation, I invite you to listen this week to hear... - How to stop resisting a...
Ep 130 - The 5 Love Languages Trap (Replay)
December 05, 2021 18:35 - 19 minutes - 26.3 MBHappy Chanukah! This week I'm on vacation but I wanted to send you a blast-from-the-past--this episode was originally aired all the way back in August of 2019! Hard to believe. It's a great reminder of how we can use the idea of the Five Love Languages to help ourselves--not to make us feel like we are missing out in what we need from our husbands. Want more? Go to kaylalevin.com/coaching and join the wait list for access to my Marriage Check-In workbook and to find out when doors open next...
Ep. 129 - Having Your Back
November 28, 2021 06:30 - 24 minutes - 33 MBUPDATE: How to Glow is now open for registration--but only for THREE DAYS! Make sure you get your spot at kaylalevin.com/coaching Can't wait to see you inside!! --- This is a perfect continuation of the Real Goals podcast. Last week I discussed how we can use goals as a way of beating ourselves up or invalidating everything between here and there… Having your back means that no matter what, you don’t use your failures to condemn or hate yourself. In this episode you will learn: Why we S...
Ep. 128 - Real Goals
November 24, 2021 08:28 - 24 minutes - 33.8 MBIn today's episode I'm sharing with you a more nuanced, human way to use goals that will serve you so much better than traditional goal-setting. In this episode you will learn... How to set "Real Goals" Why your goals won't always be SMART (specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, time-bound) How goals help keep your brain proactive How goals help with your brain's natural negativity bias How to NOT use goals against yourself Episode References Circle, Arrow, Spiral by Miriam Kos...
Ep. 127 - Staying in Your Own Lane
November 14, 2021 10:34 - 21 minutes - 29 MBThis week we are in our second of the four self-mastery skills that will move us into Glow energy! A few updates before we get started The Modern Jewish Girl podcast is awesome! If you know anyone exploring Judaism, send them her way! Lots of questions coming in about How to Glow! I'm sharing some details with you about what it will look like inside: We will have a monthly Topic Call and two Q&A calls where you can get coached live or submit questions in advance. I'm also offering my thre...
Ep. 126 - Managing Your Emotions
November 07, 2021 10:26 - 17 minutes - 23.5 MBLots of announcements this week but I'm also really excited to share this skill with you. BIG NEWS! #1: The podcast name is changing -- so keep your eyes out next week for How to Glow! This new name reflects a change in my focus--to serve Jewish married women of all ages and stages. #2: The How to Glow Membership coaching program is launching this Chanukah! Coaching is going to become available to more Jewish women--women with busy lives, busy budgets, and who deserve coaching support mo...
Ep. 125 - Social Media and Marriage - Meredith Boggs Interview Part 2
October 31, 2021 20:32 - 19 minutes - 27.1 MBMeredith Boggs is back this week and we are continuing our discussion about social media and its impact on our marriages. Listen to hear: The value of giving ourselves some time in the morning before getting on our smartphones. Us busting the myth that anyone can “do it all” Why there is no shame in admitting you get help! How to stop the scroll once and for all Get Meredith’s Stop the Scroll download at her website.
Ep. 124 - The Other Half of Life with Meredith Boggs (Part 1)
October 24, 2021 11:17 - 22 minutes - 30.6 MBThis week I’m chatting with Meredith Boggs about social media and our homes. Meredith is a speaker, writer, podcaster and blogger who focuses on "The Other Half" -- in her words, "real life that doesn’t make the highlight reel." On today’s call, we’re discussing… Simple changes that help you to be present with your husband and family when home Can we really “win” over the media giants that are trying to capture our attention? How do we get out of compare and despair when we see our peer’...
Ep. 123 - Love Confidence
October 17, 2021 08:01 - 13 minutes - 18.8 MBHave your attempts to evaluate your marriage ever ended in a spin-out of anxiety or negativity? If so, there's a simple and straightforward solution. Generating Love Confidence before moving into any troubleshooting will allow you to troubleshoot from an empowered and clear space. Listen to this week's episode to learn: How to generate more confidence in your marriage How to evaluate your marriage without freaking out How to feel good about your marriage without putting blinders on abo...
Ep. 122 - How to Get More Done (with Less Overwhelm)
October 05, 2021 19:25 - 24 minutes - 34.2 MBUpdates: First 5 Mastermind registration closes soon! Book a consult call here to learn more. Wednesdays at 2 PM Eastern. Another group for women married longer is forming as well. Email me at [email protected] to join the wait list. Coming off the whirlwind of Jewish holidays, I feel like everyone is talking about taking things off your to-do list. I won't be doing that. I'd like to talk about making your to-do list easier. The mistake we make (and I have a long Shabbos pre...
Ep. 121 - The Most Important Thing
September 14, 2021 09:51 - 31 minutes - 42.8 MBRegistration is open now for my Fall Mastermind. Register here to grab your spot! If you have any questions you can book a consult here. Today I'm sharing my vision of what is possible for us when we are dedicated to our marriages. Come along with me to hear and get inspired by the ripple effects of this one relationship being on solid, loving ground. Even beyond the value of being happy and confident in your marriage, I'll show you how your marriage effects your personal growth your par...
Ep. 120 - EYM Part 3: Bringing It All Together
August 26, 2021 19:14 - 17 minutes - 23.8 MBHeads up! The Fall Newlywed Mastermind opens for registration on Sunday JUST for the people on the waitlist so make sure you’re signed up. We are now up to part THREE where we are bringing together our introspection work with our big dreams. Here are two concepts before we go into application mode. It’s important not to judge our result of how we’re showing up as a wife based on how our husband feels. That doesn’t mean we don’t get to be empathetic, intuitive, or compassionate. But when m...
Ep. 119 - EYM Part 2: Dreams and Connection
August 20, 2021 13:36 - 21 minutes - 29.5 MBThis week we go from our introspection and accounting energy (last week’s podcast) into the “fresh notebook” energy of Elul. It’s time to set our goals, and I challenge you to do this from “big-dream” energy, not “what I think I can get” energy. Download your episode workbook here: firstyearmarried.com/ep-119-elul-your-marriage-part-2-dreams-and-connection/ In this week’s podcast you’ll learn How to set goals for what you REALLY want in your marriage How to get out of victim or blame mod...
Ep. 118 - EYM Part 1: Taking an Accounting
August 12, 2021 20:53 - 10 minutes - 14.9 MBWe're going to be using everything we know about the month of Elul and introspecting and reflecting and GROWING to benefit our marriages. Join us by signing up for the email list at firstyearmarried.com -- I LOVE the workbooks I'm preparing for you all and can't wait to share them with you! If you haven't done my Marriage Check-In mini-workbook yet, that's the best place to start (totally FREE when you join the email list) and more marriage-enhancing goodies coming your way all month! Fin...
Ep. 117 - Elul Your Marriage
August 08, 2021 20:22 - 3 minutes - 5.08 MBChodesh tov! Listen this week to hear why Elul is the PERFECT time to introspect on your marriage. Join me for my month-long email program where I'll be helping you take stock, set goals, and get more perspective on your marriage: www.firstyearmarried.com and join the email list!
Ep. 116 - Sticky Thoughts
June 13, 2021 19:46 - 21 minutes - 29.4 MBSometimes even when we know a thought is not serving us, we still can't let it go. I call these "sticky thoughts." This week I'm walking you through how you can work with even the stickiest thoughts and improve your happiness and love your life more. Interested in working with me? I have opened my schedule for private meetings for women considering joining the next group coaching program. Go to firstyearmarried.com/coaching to book your appointment.
Ep. 115 - Dating Mindset vs Marriage Mindset
June 03, 2021 16:05 - 14 minutes - 19.8 MBDating. It’s all about “do we have the same values?” “Do we want the same things?” And some version of, “can I be happy with him?” Marriage. It’s a journey of learning, knowing, and seeing the other person fully, accepting them unconditionally. Could they be any more different? To go from one to another is a process. In this week’s episode, I’m going to show you how you can help your brain if it’s stuck in Dating Mindset (even once you’re married!), evaluating and wishing your husband wo...
Ep. 114 - What We Can Learn From Search Engines
May 15, 2021 19:56 - 12 minutes - 16.6 MBOur brain is kind of like Google. We can ask it a question like, ‘does my boss like me?’ and it’ll spit back results - right? Wrong. No sirree. Big fat no. Our brain is NOT like Google. It gives us results to questions we didn’t even ask it. And those results can be terrifying sometimes (read: often). But once you understand how your brain’s search engine works, you can actually take control of it.
Bonus: Testimonial from a Newlywed Mastermind Participant - Batsheva
May 11, 2021 21:04 - 4 minutes - 5.98 MBThe Newlywed Mastermind May 25 – August 10, 2021 Register here: firstyearmarried.com/coaching
Ep. 113 - Hair Covering & Sheitals with Elisheva Storch - Part 2
May 09, 2021 21:10 - 18 minutes - 25.6 MBI have Elisheva Storch back again this week for part 2 about our conversation about hair covering and sheitals. This time we're talking about maintaining the wig, working with a stylist, and some common mistakes that many wig owners make. Elisheva's passion for this mitzvah really shines through and I love that she shares so generously with our audience! Here's the story of Charlene Aminoff, as referenced in the podcast You can find Elisheva on Instagram at @elisheva_wigs_atlanta Get o...
Ep. 112 - Hair Covering & Sheitals with Elisheva Storch - Part 1
May 02, 2021 19:19 - 26 minutes - 36.5 MBWelcome to our #Jewsode - Elisheva Storch is our hair covering guru, discussing all about how Jewish women who have chosen to cover their hair can make the process more enjoyable, plus how to manage the world of sheitals (AKA wig) purchasing. Are you destined to hate your first wig? Is wig covering hard for everyone? How can we bring this mitzvah into our awareness and connection to Hashem? Elisheva has so much to share--enjoy! And make sure you are subscribed for part 2! Find Elisheva ...
Ep. 111 - Watching Thoughts
April 25, 2021 11:21 - 20 minutes - 27.7 MBThis week I'm sharing with you my thoughts about our thoughts--and how busy and attached we can get with them. (This is an advanced episode, so if you're new here I invite you to go back to some of the earlier episodes and revisit this one later.) To get on the interest list for my next round of group coaching, go to firstyearmarried.com/coaching
Ep. 110 - Confidence Isn't About You
April 18, 2021 19:00 - 16 minutes - 22.3 MBFor a lot of my clients, preparing for Pesach meant getting ready to spend time in situations or with people where they just didn’t feel they could be themselves. They felt judged, self conscious, or just otherwise stifled. So I want to share with you a simple paradigm that will take you from insecure to confident. We’ll do this by examining what is really happening for us when we feel insecure, what artificial confidence is and why we do it, and how to create genuine, authentic confidence...
BONUS Spring Mastermind Sneak Peek!
April 15, 2021 16:07 - 13 minutes - 20 MBToday I'm taking you inside my mastermind program to give you a better idea of what we do there. Ready to join us? Registration is open at www.firstyearmarried.com/coaching --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/firstyearmarried/message
Ep. 109 - Input, Output, and Silence
April 07, 2021 22:22 - 26 minutes - 35.8 MBThis could be the most important episode you listen to. I’m sharing this week my journey, and that of my client, as we create more space for integration in a world that is so full of content. It wasn’t easy or comfortable. It was more profound and rewarding than either of us could have imagined. --- Book recommendation: Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport Homework: Create space for integration by choosing one task (ie laundry, dishes, driving to work) that you will do with no audio input...