Message from my miscarriage

Message from my MISCARRIAGE  🖤

Have you ever had a sense of loss and body aching pain to lose someone you have never met?

Last year was filled with so many events for me…

My grandma transitioned 5 days before my b-day.

My grandpa transitioned a month and a half later on the actual day of my wedding.

And now our baby….

You can look at this logically and say it’s normal, it’s common. 

Statistics say that one in every three women will experience losing a baby before week 20. 

I don’t hate many things... I rarely use this word.

Yet today I hate being a statistic.

I hate that I’m looking inside of me. What did I do wrong and why when we prepared so much for this soul’s arrival and already loved it so much it didn’t stay?

I hate how much I loved being pregnant and how much it taught me, how much I grew, and how excited I was to share it with the world.

And now all I feel is immense emptiness, sorrow and sadness.

Words can’t describe my emotional pain. 
Words can explain the hopelessness I’m feeling. 
Words can’t soothe the broken heart. 

Yet I know I’m not alone. 

So as my dear friend @missys_astrology told me:
Let your test be a testimony so you can become an even better healer. 

My pain is immense yet my heart stays open. 

If you ever went through this pain or are going through it, you’re not alone. 

And after reading books like Spirit Babies and Angel Babies I want to believe that our babies are still around, watching us, guiding us and helping us to serve a bigger purpose.

Yet in the meantime, I’m allowing my heart, my soul, and my body to feel the pain…..

Keeping the trust and faith that what is meant to be IS and our bodies are magical in creating miracles and our little one’s soul will find its way back to us.