Episode 8: Dads Part 1

In this episode, we begin discussing our trauma surrounding our relationship with our Dads. Vanessa and Doug have the same biological mother, but Doug had both a biological father who was present in his life and Vanessa's biological father--who raised him. So, in this first part, we focus on Doug's Dads and how he understands his relationship to each of them. Stay tuned for Part 2, where we'll concentrate more thoroughly on Vanessa's relationship with the man both Vanessa and Doug call "Dad."

[TRIGGER WARNINGS: Father's Day, Gaslighting, Mass Incarceration, Systemic Racism, Drug Addiction, Childhood Abandonment, Rape, Anti-Asian Racism (in the quiz)]

Show Notes

The website Doug found through a link on Twitter is called Shoppe Black, and it contains links to all sorts of Black-owned businesses--including the list of Black-owned coffee brands where he discovered Blk & Bold.

This week, Doug began drinking their La Guadalupe, Honduras - Single Origin (Direct Trade), Light Roast, and it is 100% certifiably delicious. Buy their stuff, y'all. And then follow the company on Twitter @BlkandBold so you can talk about it.

The local coffee shop in Columbus that Vanessa mentioned is called Upper Cup Coffee. If you're ever in the area--and if this whole Covid shit ever goes away--be sure to check it out.

Doug refers to his biological Dad as "Dad Rice," because his last name is "Rice," and he refers to his "other Dad" as "Dad Roland," because his last name is "Roland."

Also, Vanessa and Doug mention "Urbana" quite frequently. Just FYI--that's the central/southwestern rural Ohio hometown they grew up in. It looks like Carmazzi's, the vintage Urbana candy store Vanessa references, is still in operation after all.

Doug mentions having believed, as a 13-year old, that John Reuben was the "Christian Eminem." If you listen to his music, you'll see how ridiculous that is. Hmm, it looks like he actually is still making music. Who knew? (Bonus show note: Doug named his and Jessy's first dog together "Reuben" after John Reuben).

The study Doug is participating in with his church is based on the book How to Be an Antiracist by Ibram Kendi. It's definitely worth looking into if you haven't read it already.

We're not even going to give the quiz the courtesy of a link, because it's sooooo racist. If you Google it, find the quiz, and don't understand why we think it's racist, then we recommend you actually getting to know some Asian people (or at least Asian-Americans) before you go visiting any country on that list.

This episode was recorded on June 24, 2020.