So exasperating! Your partner seems like an extra child. Not what you signed up for, right!

And, no amount of pointing out his/her failures, incompetencies, or lack of thought seems to change things, either.

Infuriating!


OK...I understand, but it's definitely not going to help if you are viewing your partner as an extra child. That alone needs your immediate attention!


If you actually treat your partner as an extra child--giving direction, finding fault, ridiculing, shaming, and blaming--your relationship will always be lacking in those three MUST-HAVES: equality, reciprocity, and mutuality. It will always be frustrating, infuriating, and unsatisfying.


And, the bedroom? Going to consistently be contentious. No desire because there's not respect. It's all going to go sideways, and I give you some pointed examples of why in this episode.


So, if you're unhappy in your relationship, it could be that this episode can change all that as you understand the impossible dynamics of parenting your partner as a primary process. Sure, we are occasionally that parental figure that makes the bad go away for each other, that soothes the bruises and bumps. That's great.


It's when the primary attitude of an attempt to be a partner is "It feels like I have an extra child" is in place, then everything else slowly disintegrates.


Listen and I'm sure it will makes sense to you. Good news: this can change!



Big hugs!

Rhoberta


HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE:

How you damage your relationship when you act like your partner's parentWhy you feel resentment when you feel you have to parent your partnerWhat 'parenting' your partner may look/soundWhy behaving like a parent to your partner builds resentmentWhy you don't want to sleep with someone who treats you like a childHow to see the contrasts and changeHow to change and improve your relationship ...and, get the spark back, too.


Want clarity, insights, strategies, and support from me, Dr. Rhoberta Shaler? We can talk: Introductory session for new clients, $97


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