31. Tools to Self-Soothe and Access Emotional Freedom with Jesse Finkelstein

Are you wondering how you can independently access your emotional freedom? We’re talking with Jesse Finkelstein, founder & creator of The Game of Real Life, to discuss how to practice vulnerability, cultivate more self-compassion & build your emotional regulation toolkit. Jesse dives into dialectical behavioral therapy, how emotional attachments and blocks can get in the way of success, and the importance of cultivating the right community and being present.

Jesse is a doctoral student in clinical psychology at Rutgers University and a DBT Therapist and the creator of the upcoming The Game of Real Life, a one-of-a-kind card game rooted in Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT). He is also a researcher and clinician at the Dialectical Behavior Therapy clinic at Rutgers University, where his main areas of research include the use of technology and new media to deliver effective psychotherapeutic interventions. 


Show Notes:

-Going from designer to therapist: how Jesse made this transition

-Recognizing purpose in life: one decision that changes everything

-The difference between cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and dialectical behavior therapy (DBT)

-Practices of acceptance & emotional regulation in DBT

-Having compassion for one’s emotional experience

-Navigating the balance between acceptance & change

-The complex emotion of shame and how it gets in the way of us finding emotional freedom

-Thinking in extremes and its role in creating dysregulation & disconnection

-Holding the belief that multiple truths can co-exist

-Metabolic energy and its role in learning, creating & building something new

-Emotional avoidance is one of the greatest ways we suffer & is counterproductive to processing our emotions

-Compassion means validating our experience & accepting our emotions

-Cait shares a quote from Jesse’s Instagram: the science of how we are all connected

-Loving Kindness and practicing vulnerability as tools to help us accept that we are all connected

-ABC please: accumulate positive experiences, Build mastery by doing things we enjoy, and Cope ahead by rehearsing a plan ahead of time

-Shifting the belief, “The world is a dangerous place” by having new experiences via exposure therapy

-The 4 components of DBT: Interpersonal effectiveness (getting what you want & setting limits); mindfulness; tolerating distress; and emotional regulation

-Jesse shares more details on his game, “The Game of Real Life” and how it can support people build & grow their emotional toolkit

Resources:

-Check out the website for “The Game of Real Life”

-DBT-RU YouTube Video Series

-TheraHive (DBT Online Skill Courses)

-Brene Brown, “Atlas of the Heart”

-Jesse’s Instagram: @talkisgood

-Cait’s Instagram: @caitrossco

-Cait’s Website

-Lindsay’s Instagram: @myvitalside

-The Vital-Side Membership

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