Miserable Retail Slave
300 episodes - English - Latest episode: over 1 year ago - ★★★★★ - 53 ratingsMiserable Retail Slave is a big, dumb comedy show that looks at life, love, and the odd daily occurrences that keep life interesting.
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Episodes
S07E21. The C Word
March 13, 2020 01:00 - 31 minutes - 29.7 MBFull Body Condom/ your hands are deadly weapons (0:34)/ Aquaman’s 60-minute rule (1:48)/ that bubble boy life and bubble boy pick-up lines (3:05)/ what about the Miserable Retail Slaves? (4:41)/ identifying those who don’t wash their hands (5:30)/ The Great Toilet Paper Raid of 2020 - fear and loathing in the TP aisle (6:14)/ the grand lost art of teepeeing (7:12)/ never talk to your parents (8:14)/ Toilet Paper Masks (8:54)/ Things are serious with coronavirus, but let’s laugh (9:22)/ the r...
S07E20. Voyeuristic Sponge
February 24, 2020 02:52 - 20 minutes - 19.5 MBFake Facebook profiles/ Miserable Retail Short (2:50)/ the dots above my I (5:53)/ a lady walks into a quilt store (6:31)/ grandmas gone wild (7:45)/ the death smell of horse (8:30)/ burying a dead horse (9:25)/ a perfect time for revenge (10:02)/ pour one out for your fallen horsey (10:50)/ stink worries (11:30)/ the story of the worst cut down I’ve ever heard (11:59)/ our own personal Pig Pen (14:30)/ Livestream for the Cure 4/ what is the worst smell you’ve ever dealt with (18:25) (...
S07E19. Glory Cheese
February 10, 2020 14:06 - 1 hour - 61.8 MBEmotional support animals/ Tommy’s expiration date (1:10)/ “people food” (2:00)/ constipated with glory (4:30)/ glory cheese (5:00)/ universal humor (7:42)/ the origins of Rand-eh (10:40)/ emotional support poo (12:00)/ Tommy’s went through weiners (14:00)/ emotional support bald eagles (16:50)/ have you all recovered from the Halftime show yet (25:34)/ Shakira riding a bald eagle (26:00)/ Adam Levine’s tattoos (28:00)/ Party lines filter controls (33:50)/ Miserable Internment Camp Show (35:...
S07E18. Friendship Bracelet
January 27, 2020 00:31 - 1 hour - 71.1 MBHigher/ This podcast is abstract art (4:00)/ Return of the segment - Is it offensive or NOT? (4:51)/ Stephen King is NOT a pennyWISE man (8:10)/ Tommy becomes cancelled (18:00)/ The 5th season in Michigan - Daniel Radcliffe Season (19:10)/ Stopped by a train (24:00)/ Quality question: Would you go into battle with the tattoos on your body as weapons? (26:00)/ People watching at the Tommy comedy show (27:57)/ Give me a simple ah - wealth affects pronunciation (29:00)/ Why are people allowed ...
S07E17. Can You Spare a Square?
January 21, 2020 03:41 - 46 minutes - 54.5 MBTime is a valuable resource/ Seinfeld love (1:26)/ Toilet paper and time is the same thing (2:12)/ What is love? (4:46)/ Reaching nap age (8:50)/ The Trump 2020 dollar bill (10:49)/ Tommy the wordsmith and another Tommy poem, The Pledge of Allegiance (14:06)/ New online dating terms: Paperclipping (18:02)/ Using NBA Jam terms to describe your life, Tommy was on TV (20:50)/ As Seen on TV (26:55)/ Randy’s Career Fair: Russian Slap Fighting and Xarm (27:32)/ The Walking Oxymoron (29:30)/ Slap ...
S07E16. For Richard Stan
January 12, 2020 16:25 - 1 hour - 57.3 MBThe Power Stance/ Leather bound journals (1:15)/ Tommy, the nostalgic reader (2:20)/ The United Steaks of America and being a dumb kid (3:30)/ American Pie Myths and what would you call your plane (5:20)/ Learning from Jeopardy (7:15)/ Totally 1998 (9:25)/ Unleashing a dad sigh (11:10)/ Instruction Manual Dads (12:19)/ All for the Love of Shinedown (13:30)/ How are your cigarette withdrawals going 18-20 year olds?(20:00)/ Tommy the substitute teacher (21:00)/ Tommy reads some of his poetry: ...
S07E15. Rebel Flag of Poverty
November 19, 2019 22:30 - 57 minutes - 54.3 MBNo rules apply in a Michigan winter/ high school football in small towns (0:55)/ The Michigan Winter Left Town (2:35)/ I’m sick of people who think they can do whatever they want (5:38)/ snow blades on trucks (8:30)/ the Mouth of Michigan (12:05)/ Tommy’s a vampire and his tattoos (13:45)/ Randy’s birthday (15:15)/ “Randy’s Negative Yelp Reviews” (17:00)/ an awkward situation brings humans together (19:50)/ Rebel Flag of Poverty (22:15)/ workplace problems (23:19)/ The eyes of Zuckerberg (27...
S07E14. Crisp Waters
November 11, 2019 01:19 - 1 hour - 59.4 MBNose as a time machine/ Smells that remind you of grandma (1:00)/ Crisp Waters (3:10)/ The Ultimate Trust Fall Experience (9:40)/ Name Sayings (10:00)/ Tommy dyes his clothes (10:50)/ A real life MySpace Top 8 (13:52)/ Minors buying alcohol becomes a social media event (16:55)/ Stunted (21:20)/ A “hey mister” (22:46)/ A “Wife Guy” (23:40)/ Borat (26:21)/ Tommy and Dave Landau (28:00)/ Bikers and drama (30:02)/ Post Malone (38:41)/ Jared Leto has a cult (44:44)/ The Joker (50:23)/ Obama talks...
S07E13. The Hype of the Summer
October 23, 2019 01:25 - 58 minutes - 54.6 MBEncountering characters in the world/ Tommy’s dumb concession stand volunteer story (0:40)/ The nexus of all the walking trash (3:20)/ personal checks are time machines (5:06)/ a one man conversation (6:24)/ Teen slang and I oop sk sk sk (11:00)/ Randy-spiced (17:24)/ The fable of the grasshopper and the Equinox (17:54)/ Judgmental Jiminy Cricket (19:44)/ A date crasher (22:26)/ two times getting stood up in one week (25:00)/ fixing Tommy’s Jersey joke (30:40)/ Tommy the road comic and Tommy...
S07E12. Love Letters Into the Abyss
October 01, 2019 03:09 - 1 hour - 68.1 MBThis weird, wacky world/ Tommy’s show with Kevin Farley, meeting Kevin, and talking about Chris Farley (1:15)/ All the OMG Girls ran out of White Claw and do they make pumpkin-spiced White Claw (3:40)/ The world rebooted two weeks ago and now we have White Claw (5:05)/ Kevin Farley’s best friend (7:25)/ Dan Akroyd on Joe Rogan (8:50)/ Dan Akroyd spooned with a ghost (10:21)/ what Tommy believes (12:24)/ Ego in creativity (16:27)/ Learning to throw a boomerang (17:14)/ Gretchen Witmer - fix t...
S07E11. Bang Blows
September 24, 2019 02:24 - 1 hour - 58.2 MBRandy was assaulted and MRS becomes a big, dumb true crime show: My Almost Perfect Murder/ these called newspapers (3:15)/ paperboys? (4:30)/ Paperboy the NES game (5:50)/ “chew on this”(6:28)/ Tommy’s tale of smartness (8:22)/ Tommy’s vicious cycle (12:30)/ Tommy is going to dinner with Kevin Farley (14:20)/ Tommy’s stupid voice is not Randy’s (16:00)/ An argument over a blue t-shirt (17:20)/ an entitled retail encountered and bang blow (20:00)/ Tommy’s faded glory and pre YouTube fame (23:...
S07E10. Delicious Irony
September 13, 2019 11:12 - 1 hour - 76.2 MBFranks were born that way/ The passage of time (1:15)/ A confidential tale + living a life powered by confusion (1:45)/ Dad Grishem (2:50)/ A Deer Tale + the best pizza boy in movies (4:00)/ Tommy lives in a bad part of town now and gets a visit from The Washington Prowler (14:00)/ I Love you Colonel Sanders. A Finger Licking’ Good Dating Simulator (16:35)/ Let’s talk about culinary school (18:50)/ The Green Day, Fall Out Boy, Weezer Tour (20:00)/ Warm yourself by the burning flames that is ...
S07E09. Hey There, Crocodile Rock
September 10, 2019 18:29 - 51 minutes - 48.8 MBA road trip episode! Sleep number car (2:49)/ a sign language road argument (3:39)/ reuniting with childhood friends and burning the mother down (7:39)/ The Intervention Retail Slave (IRS) (14:00)/ is it offensive or naw? + the art of people watching (17:00)/ #38 (23:00)/ Our new Patron Saint, Jay Chandrasekhar (25:36)/ Tommy opened for Jay Chandrasekhar and the story of how Tommy got the clip (26:00)/ I’ve never heard of White Claw before the last 2 weeks (35:55)/ Tommy ruins everyt...
S07E08. Flight of the Bumblebae
September 02, 2019 02:57 - 1 hour - 60.6 MBS07E08. Flight of the Bumblebae (Special guest Dan from Netflix N’ Swill podcast) The Mattress Man/ The “That’s What She Said” game/ The disappointment of life and delayed gratification (1:13)/ the drunk stereotype girl (3:55)/ The Drinking Challenge (4:54)/ Horror is a 2nd grade Beatles musical (7:00)/ Netflix N’ Swill podcast (13:50)/ Netflix Purgatory and what are you binging? (Bojack Horseman, Black Mirror, Stranger Things) (15:11)/ Randy’s guardian angel is George “the Ani...
S07E07. Dopamine Squirts
August 25, 2019 23:54 - 55 minutes - 51.6 MBWe're back. Finally. We promise. Our plan to save the country/ American Carnage (1:19)/ These olds and what are these teens up to these days (2:00)/ Uniting the country through the man-bun and the Man-Bun Brigade and Beautiful Macho (3:39)/ the Myth of Hayden Man-Bun (8:38)/ storming Area 51 (13:38)/ Getting courted with job interviews and becoming adults (16:55)/ Randy’s career fair: job interviews are like online dating (20:00)/ the birth of Rurals J Perkins and Tom Hanks is a cad (22:06...
S07E06. Bosom Department
July 18, 2019 11:49 - 45 minutes - 42.6 MB3 dates scheduled, no dates had/ Tommy’s far away and distant like an emotional star (1:15)/ No good comes from the line “I Met Her on Tinder” (1:40)/ The first 48 hours are the most important (in online dating) (3:00)/ Can we put the faces of online dating ghosts on the sides of Starbucks coffee cups (4:00)/ Promises (4:50)/ Tinder is like going to the strip club in the middle of the afternoon (5:30)/ The Summer of George (9:15)/ Standing in line at the 7-11 (10:15)/ Short Guy Bagel Boss Me...
S07E05. Sinister Tinder
June 26, 2019 15:24 - 1 hour - 62.3 MBSweatsuit Koala/ A restaurant problem - no straws, save the turtles (:48)/ A Fancy Nancy and not a Tom Clancy (2:00)/ Save a straw, save a turtle - the turtle straw (3:30)/ Turtle season (5:00)/ Shredder and Krang should’ve used straws against the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (6:30)/ Song of the Summer: Old Town Road (11:20)/ Week of the weird (12:30)/ A public restroom experience - being a big stall hog (15:20)/ Living in Selfish City, USA, population, me myself and moi (21:35)/ Overreactio...
S07E04. Chapstick
June 07, 2019 03:23 - 1 hour - 66.9 MBA comedian’s chariot/ a Midway Adventure - people watching - the simplest things about human behavior (1:00)/ Enter: Mom Jeans (2:30)/ Head Daddy Macho makes his move with a high waisted woman (5:57)/ That Work Work Work Week Felon (14:00)/ you ever break a promise (16:00)/ Words are weird - Ruthless - find your Ruth (16:25)/ tap dancing around words when you first date someone - women have word power - grammar vultures (20:00)/ Finding the dumbest genie - not buying Will Smith as the Genie...
S07E03. Chicken Soup for the Midlife Crisis Soul
May 30, 2019 13:30 - 36 minutes - 35.1 MBHigh and mighty about calendars/ “a man has a lot of deep thoughts when he’s under a white trash sky and a Budweiser spell” (1:00)/ brooding like a silent son (2:30)/ The King of Funk (4:20)/ First person shoot your shoter game (6:13)/ sneezing in front of another man (7:00)/ Mattitude (8:15)/ Perspectives (9:30)/ Focusing on what is, not what if (12:30)/ The Bermuda shorts triangle (14:15)/ Mr Pancakes (17:00)/ learning hypnotism (18:00)/ An invitation made (20:22)/ Quality Question: sincer...
S07E02. Choose Your Own Existential Crisis
May 27, 2019 18:53 - 47 minutes - 55 MBUnleased episode, recorded in October 2018 Choose your own adventure/ Randy’s childhood broadcasting skills (1:00)/ choose your own existential crisis (4:50)/ That time Tommy heckled a comedian (6:30)/ Tommy’s opening for Jim Florentine and Tommy looks like a Muppet (7:45)/ UFC will be better with cyborgs (9:00)/ “Life...now with 30% more fretting...” (9:30)/ the soundtrack to sleeping (13:55)/ there’s nothing worse than your parent’s views on the issues (14:45)/ Outside, the gawky awk...
S07E01. Your Love
May 22, 2019 04:41 - 1 hour - 60.3 MBThis week, it’s an entire episode wrapped around the song, “Your Love” by The Outfield. How can you sustain an entire hour based on a 3 minute song? It’s possible. Take a listen and learn how. Josie’s on a vacation far away/ Songs as book marks/ Dancing and the folly of saying yes/ Life is a collection of all the lessons that we have learned/ The 7th year of Miserable Retail Slave/ The Venomous Duck-billed Platypus of Podcasting/ Leaving things unsaid/ Tommy No-Game/ I Ain’t Got Many ...
228. Paul and the Cup of Joe
May 16, 2019 04:17 - 59 minutes - 55 MBName equals how horrible people are/ Dollar stores and Licky Charms (1:00)/ Paul, the dollar store cashier (3:00)/ The rules of trash can (5:30)/ 7 years of Miserable Retail Slave (11:10)/ Retail therapy (13:30)/ The books in Tommy’s office, the House that Comedy Built (16:07)/ a mid life crisis job and needing a motorcycle to get the girl (18:53)/ The comedy adventures (25:00)/ Tommy the realist therapist (27:00)/ The blues (29:50)/ the average American spends too much on nonessentials (32:...
227. The Couch of Spite
May 10, 2019 13:44 - 1 hour - 57 MBMemes/ Tommy’s sober again/ it’s gotta be May/ if you drank Tommy (3:55)/ Tommy - alcoholic beverage (4:40)/ Getting tattooed with haunted ink (6:34)/ The 27 Club and if Kurt Cobain had lived (8:45)/ beware your thrift store purchase might have ghosts (11:00)/ Stephen King and Joe Hill (11:40)/ the war between heaven and hell is like Monopoly (13:45)/ the ghost perfume (15:45)/ haunted couches (17:00)/ spirit animals (21:00)/ The milkshake (24:00)/ double blown and Randy on Epic Film G...
226. Origin Story
April 30, 2019 12:27 - 51 minutes - 47.6 MBA story begins/ culmination/ Easter - a holiday or not (1:00)/ robotic miserable Retail slaves (2:13)/ Tommy’s U-scan story (3:10)/ automated retail employees will be the start of the robot apocalypse/ Spring weather and Anxious dads waiting to mow those lawns (10:50)/ becoming a lawn dad (12:10)/ second hand stank (13:20)/ Miserable Retail Slave turns 7 years old soon (16:32)/ finding a purpose in unemployment (16:40)/ The Gumball Mogul and The Severe Stutter (17:15)/ Finding salvation in T...
225. God's Court Jester
April 19, 2019 15:41 - 1 hour - 64 MBAdult kindergarteners/ “does everything you do have to be a chore?”/ Tommy day dreams about wallpaper (3:00)/ Tommy is sober again/ one loose vowel (7:00)/ filters (10:00)/ the most passive-aggressive way to break up (12:15)/ the cool things in Tommy’s office (16:20)/ livestream for the cure 3 (22:00)/ Tommy’s 21 birthday and Tommy destroys a girl in the mosh pit (24:49)/ Tommy’s bathroom adventures (28:00)/ God’s Court Jester/ what is the appeal of the white shorts? (29:00)/ The Myth of the...
224. Flight or Flight Harder
April 01, 2019 00:36 - 1 hour - 56.7 MBThe things that I worry about most never seem to happen/ Birds (1:35)/ Tommy running pains (3:20)/ Herb (6:00)/ it’s a good thing animals are dumb (7:00)/ The man who killed a cougar with his bare hands (7:30)/ Dad-toos (9:00)/ A flock of sassy parrots (9:40)/ The Endearing Old Dogs of Podcasting (13:00)/ Tommy’s whirlwind tour of the Midwest (14:00)/ Tommy’s performing in Canada...apologies to Canada (14:47)/ The Dirt on Netflix (15:40)/ Crosswords Mysteries and romantic comedies on the Hal...
223. The Operation Instagram Challenge
March 21, 2019 20:18 - 1 hour - 66.1 MBGas stations are the crossroads of America/ Are there rich people gas stations?/ The origin of Tommy’s super powers + Tommy Man (2:30)/ What is this: Quote City USA? (5:30)/ Randy’s face makes a girl puke (5:40)/ Randy Looks like a fetus boy (10:15)/ a new weight loss program (12:00)/ winning the approval of Tommy’s daughter (16:00)/ we’re like Seinfeld meets Clerks (17:00)/ being on Joe Rogan’s podcast and Bill Burr (18:53)/ teens look like they’re born with filters on (22:12)/ Aliens, the ...
222. Officer Cupid
March 12, 2019 22:03 - 1 hour - 61.2 MBTommy has a Wall O’ Comedy and is no Ric Flair (0:55)/ A Tommy is born (Tommy hates “A Star is Born”) (3:00)/ Bradley Cooper, we remember where you came from (4:20)/ Tommy is a headlining comedian now (6:01)/ The highlight of champions (8:20)/ achieving dreams (9:01)/ “I don’t want to be famous”(13:00)/ Tree names (21:02)/ Randy is a magnet now (22:29)/ Officer Cupid - OkCupid has made Randy a moderator - OkStupid (25:05)/ Spud Webb shoes (27:00)/ hey Czech Republic, we see you (29:00)/ ASMR...
221. Chum with Benefits
February 27, 2019 01:14 - 37 minutes - 34.7 MBFlying solo/ Getting tired of being of people being disappointing (2:15)/ make your moms proud (4:00)/ lasers (5:00)/ never got that laser background (6:00)/ The wrong idea about GI Joe (7:41)/ class reunions (13:20)/ social media killed the class reunion (13:54)/ fart rock (16:22)/ the return of Narc Fist (16:53)/ The meaning of rock songs (17:48)/ liking people and people watching (19:14)/ a Retail story of a mumbler (20:00)/ blissful ignorance (23:24)/ Catfish of America (23:50)/ Catfish...
220. The "Garden Fresh" Prince
February 13, 2019 04:51 - 1 hour - 73.2 MBEpiphany + The new premise of the podcast is we search for our premise every week + The meaning of Todd/ Tommy’s epiphanies (2:29)/ The Beloved’s epiphany (3:01)/ Bidet talk (4:55)/ Tommy’s hand washing reward (6:13)/ Never been epiphany worthy (6:55)/ Pizza Talk (10:16)/ Livestream for the Cure 3 with the Epic Film (16:00)/ Ice Falls (20:04)/ Dave Coulier - our new arch enemy (23:10)/ Deserve (25:37)/ “I threw up in my mouth a little bit” (26:17)/ The Nacho Fiasco re-visited (27:30)/ Vanil...
219. All American Stepdad
January 30, 2019 20:39 - 1 hour - 60 MBMr Punctual, a new super villain/ Yet Another Gas Station tale (2:47)/ Does Kid Rock remember Tommy? (3:30)/ “Just Do It” face tattoos (5:00)/ Greta Van Fleet on SNL/ are there tattoo counselors out there? (8:47)/ DIY tattoos and the straight line requirement (13:00)/ Tommy practices a joke (17:00)/ irrational fears and Heavy Metal Drive Thru (19:55)/ “I’m on the drug of life...they told me it was the best high” (24:00)/ Due for a mighty fall (31:00)/ A bar fall and black tar pit karma (33:3...
218. Netflix and Comfort
January 23, 2019 18:28 - 1 hour - 84.3 MBThis time, we welcome one of our very first listeners ever to the show. The man, the myth, the legend: special guest, Armchair Producer Doug Goodwin! Can you ride a bike?/ an outlier for a lot of things (1:20)/ an untold story of the bike (3:20)/ The Tomato Throw (6:50)/ “Playboy” Tommy Thompson (13:00)/ Armchair Producer Doug Goodwin (13:46)/ getting listeners is like trying to dig out of Shawshank (19:41)/ how did Doug meet his wife (22:06)/ Doug’s old school online dating adventures...
217. The Gas Station Ballad of Johnny Sonata
January 11, 2019 02:56 - 1 hour - 67.5 MBOther people’s pets/ Tommy is a dog and Randy is a cat (1:00)/ Zeppelin, the lost cat (1:44)/ Pet antivaxxers (2:20)/ Plenty of Fish name change (4:35)/ Damien and Jake the Snake Facts (6:00)/ Head over heels and fear of flips (7:00)/ The Spit Curse (9:50)/ 2019 new you (16:23)/ Batman and Robin and being a George Clooney Batman (18:00)/ The Sweatpants Mentality (20:00)/ Cheers and We need a throwback ‘80s theme song (21:00)/ The Gas Station Troubadour at the McGasStation (24:50)/ The guitar...
216. #Swipelife
December 28, 2018 16:45 - 1 hour - 60.3 MBAnimals are getting sassier/ Tommy talks about the deep sea (3:00)/ a wall of geese (5:00)/ Tommy finally agrees that he has polka dot eyes (8:00)/ Possum talk (9:35)/ Possum the Peanuts (11:02)/ Confidence (12:47)/ Christmas (21:00)/ watching a Salvation Army bell ringer slowly lose his mind (24:15)/Springsteen on Broadway (26:22)/ Every man should be a Bruce Springsteen (28:13)/ no hope for an online dater (35:02)/ online dating ads/ #swipelife/ “I’ll be some girl’s cuddledud” (36:00)/ MRS...
215. Shuffling Pajama Idiots
December 12, 2018 04:15 - 1 hour - 66 MBThe Shuffling Pajama Idiots/ The promise of the text message (1:30)/ these horrible texts (2:00)/ why are there spelling errors in texts (3:00) / people need a good ducking (3:20)/ an app to compose texts for you (4:00)/ “I don’t fear the robot apocalypse because my iPhone battery won’t last more than 10 hours” (6:30)/ you better bag yourself a Wanda (9:03)/ outtie bellybuttons (14:00)/ “I’ve got problems for days and miles to drive, tell no lies and talk no jive” (16:00)/ Alcohol - the smar...
214. Mister Worldy
December 11, 2018 14:29 - 50 minutes - 47.4 MBMr Worldly is about to speak: it’s better to be weird (2:02)/ normal people at comedy shows (5:20)/ Talking to the typical Michigan Male (5:55)/ the beautiful thing about idiots is they’re sincere about everything (9:46)/ Tommy is the Bob Ross of Comedy - Happy little Jokes 16:18)/ Snow plow season (17:32)/ who will rule the driveways: Fred or Frank? (19:30)/ Talking Taft (21:37)/ Sean Connery on Rosie O’ Donnell (23:05)/ Taft gets stuck in a bathtub and loves bathtubs (25:55)/ The Future is...
213. The Six Fingers of Abe
November 21, 2018 06:04 - 1 hour - 56.2 MBSurly Temple and the stunning optimist/ Tommy Horse Noise (1:15)/ children are our future (1:45)/ do believe in luck (4:25)/ The universe is a merry prankster (5:45)/ The story of an Abe Lincoln impersonator (6:30)/ Fabio vs the Seagulls (8:10)/ The six fingers of Abe (13:29)/ Give me a solid Taft (15:20)/ John Tyler talk (16:23)/ The lessons of Gabe Lincoln (18:24)/ Thanksgiving Special (22:23)/ Yams (23:30)/ White meat vs Dark meat (26:16)/ why do we talk to babies (30:00)/ Haley Joel Osme...
212. The Skid Mark Assassin
November 16, 2018 05:41 - 1 hour - 59.4 MBMacho Kool Aid Man/ how did cavemen function without energy drinks? (1:30)/ leave tastes alone BUT IT’S NOT ENOUGH FOR ME (3:20)/ where have we been? (10:00)/ holidays (10:30)/ ominous plans for the future (12:45)/ Tommy Conscious (13:20)/ Randy’s very 1st baby picture (14:45)/ Tommy and Randy’s Big Night Out (17:25)/ Dance Party (19:15)/ Tommy becomes a band groupie (21:40)/ The drunkest woman (23:00)/ Matt the major dudebro (27:00)/ Electric Ladies (28:10)/ The key to getting all the ladie...
211. The Great GIF Crisis
October 08, 2018 04:24 - 1 hour - 67 MBRandy’s Career Fair: GIF farmer/ Communication is hard these days (2:00)/ The Great GIF Crisis (2:50)/ The Office (6:34)/ Do you even know what makes a magical GIF work? (8:16)/ Tommy has thoughts about a Marc Maron meme (12:53)/ No adults know how to actually adult (15:00)/ Stephen Colbert’s thoughts on comedy (16:20)/ Stealing someone’s birthday thunder (17:30)/ Stealing moments between gas stations (19:36)/ you can tell how old a man is by how curved his hat’s bill is (20:00)/ A gas s...
210. Stay Awake
September 28, 2018 15:21 - 1 hour - 57.7 MBWe become a true crime podcast/ A dog playing frisbee (2:30)/ Tommy forgets his tattoos/ The man with the adult coloring book arms (4:00)/ Greta Van Fleet And Frankenmuth, Michigan/ “In the name of Fido, I commit vengeance upon her person...”/ The Spider Behind You (11:50)/ EB White (12:30)/ A weird week: walking on a flaming carrot (13:55)/ being rich is a waste to a slob (16:36)/ Eminem vs Machine Gun Kelly and Rap Devil talk (18:00)/ older Eminem albums (19:00)/ Poetry Battles: ee cummin...
209. Poe
August 27, 2018 01:22 - 1 hour - 59.5 MBGetting up in the morning is a waste of time (3:30)/ Randy is a catch-22 (4:00)/ Voodoo Priest John Madden and his curse (5:00)/ Sunday Scaries and Summer Scaries (6:52)/ exploring things (9:30)/ A crazy Detroit Adventure: of live nude girls, Optimus Prime, and beer (10:00)/ Pistachios, the Infinite Nut (15:00)/ Quality Question: why do people try to craft the perfect joke when it’ll never beat a well-times fart? (19:10)/ The Farting Comedian (19:52)/ Hooters is shutting down after recent st...
208. Hollering at Your Jalapeños
August 17, 2018 18:48 - 1 hour - 78.9 MBHey. How was your summer? We're back. The wedding guest/ going to a wedding with someone you’ve never met or talked to/ an online dating open invitation (2:03)/ slaying it like Bugs Bunny at his finest (3:03)/ the age when “maybe” became a “no” (5:58)/ Meatloaf philosophy (7:34)/ poetry in motion (8:54)/ the judgmental round (10:10)/ Tommy likes drawing seahorses as kids (10:47)/ is the Bermuda Triangle ok now? (12:46)/ Mr Everything (17:42)/ perpetually frustrated (20:14)/ overreactio...
207. If My Face Was A Drug, I'd Sell It By The Instagram
July 24, 2018 04:51 - 1 hour - 66.2 MBFlying cars/ Nonstop Glee/ The Legend of Wacky Warren (1:57)/ Tide Pod challengers (2:30)/ Flirting with girls in a flying car (3:24)/ Cheesy or Corny: which is the worst food descriptor (3:45)/ Proper Bro-tocol (5:09)/ Tommy’s Beard and transformation into a skunk ape (6:05)/ Tommy’s impeccable brows (6:51)/ Bacon obsessions (10:19)/ an intervention for Tommy (10:42)/ A middle age choose your own adventure (13:00)/ Woodie Wagon cars (15:00)/ Elon Musk pledges to help with the Flint water cr...
206. (Skin) Deep Thinkers
July 10, 2018 03:32 - 56 minutes - 53.2 MBRecorded on the road to Lansing, MI... Post Malone, face tattoos, “Always Tired”, and adjectives on your face/ Skin Deep Thinkers (1:28)/ Inviting celebrities to your wedding (1:45)/ Riding on the roof of your car (6:16)/ Road trip stunt tales (8:43)/ mooning tales (9:41)/ online dating nonsense and Kayak (14:23)/ a text message sent (17:21)/ opening up a barely town convenience store (17:41)/ creating a dating app for customers to hit on retail employees (23:49)/ “Straight Up Randy (...
205. Don Juan Casanova of Studville
July 02, 2018 14:51 - 1 hour - 64.8 MBTommy’s Maroon 5 haircut/ Mick Foley (:45)/ Too many “ladder falls to the face” (1:00)/ A ladder-cage Match aka Hell in the Cell (WWE King of the Ring 1998) (1:22)/ “He’s like Johnny Knoxville, if Johnny Knoxville was a complete and total anarchist, nihilist, and masochist (3:02)/ Randy’s first job (3:30)/ The Miserable WrestleTalk Podcast/ Late fees are stupid (4:40)/ Taking an IQ test to get a video store job (5:15)/ Redbox users are the most entitled people (6:30)/ “I would turtle like Cl...
Tangents of the Damned 2. Deadpool vs Waylon Jennings
June 25, 2018 02:54 - 10 minutes - 11 MBWe've been known to go on tangents during episodes of Miserable Retail Slave, so here they are. Smaller, bite-sized episodes of your favorite big, dumb comedy show: Tangents of the Damned. In this short, mini-episode, we talk about Deadpool, pick our favorite Ryan Reynolds movies, get nostalgic about skate parties, and cringe at the thought of the couples skate. Heroes/ Tommy lies about never seeing a super hero movie/ Deadpool interrupts Stephen Colbert’s monologue on The Late Show ...
204. Just Ask
June 19, 2018 14:53 - 1 hour - 59.4 MBIt’s that time of year where people are graduating high school/ one more graduating class to remind you how old you’re getting (1:29)/ definition of “sexist” (2:29)/ Can we get published guidelines for all the PC words we should be saying? (3:29)/ a refreshingly honest graduation speech (4:25)/ school is weird (5:30)/ what percentage of kids go to college now? (6:14)/ Randy’s shattered dreams (7:03)/ still best friends with your high school best friend(8:31)/ skate or die! (12:00)/ “I guess ...
203. Deep Don Knotts Sniff
June 11, 2018 02:24 - 42 minutes - 39.5 MBTommy doesn’t know the difference between slur and slang/ The Pre-Date / The pre-date rulebook/ “no one’s ever been charming in the presence of a scone”/ 2018 - The Year of Scumbags and Forced Apologies/ The Internet - we’re in the business of boning/ That Active Shooter game/ Tommy’s living his best life/ if aliens came to Earth, how long until someone wanted to eat them?/ Octopi are aliens / The Giant Squid/ Hugs from Bigfoot/ Tommy’s Soapbox/Will we take a hike? and Weird Tommy/Quality Qu...
Tangents of the Damned: 1. Facebucks
June 04, 2018 03:35 - 9 minutes - 8.55 MBWe've been known to go on tangents during episodes of Miserable Retail Slave, so here they are. Smaller, bite-sized episodes of your favorite big, dumb comedy show: Tangents of the Damned. This time, we cover Facebook getting into the worlds of online dating and cryptocurrency. Plus, Weezer covering Toto's "Africa" and "Roseanna" and the significance of the song Africa to us. Facebucks (of Facebook dating and cryptocurrency) - Can you imagine if Tommy could comprehend everything tha...
202. You Can't Kiss a Baby (Live with Epic Film Guys)
May 28, 2018 19:27 - 58 minutes - 54 MBLive from Livestream for the Cure 2.0 with Epic Film Guys and special guests, Jake and Tom from Jake and Tom Conquer the World We were part of Livestream for the Cure 2.0 recently, a 30 hour live streaming event put on by the Epic Film Guys to raise money for cancer research. We had a blast kicking the event off. So thanks to everyone who donated, viewed, shared, liked, retweeted, or thought about doing any of those things. The event managed to raise an amazing $11,545.88 for cancer re...