334: Sienna A. revisits

🔸 Who can hold suicide, panic, pathetic, self-harm & the little girl in the big room?

🔹 Parts:

Suicide “I could” v “I couldn’t”.
Self harm. You’ve been a horrible parent. You should be punished, destroyed for good.
Everything would be better if I could cry.
A big lack of being held.
Pathetic.
(J direct accessed “this is pathetic” even though she said “feeling pathetic”)
Asking to be held is weird.
A tiny me in a big room.A bunny for little girl

🎓 What I'd like to do differently:

I mighta been too pushy re “holding the punisher”. Maybe I wasn’t listening well enough during such an important part of the process. She said arms length and closer, so I assumed it wasn’t too much of a leap. At least useful data, very important experiment.

Overall I think my confidence is warranted, I do see “giftedness” in Sienna’s awareness, soing to so many hard places/parts but with such clarity and her own direction.

I fucked up when she said “feeling pathetic” (exile I assume) and I targeted “this is pathetic” (protector). But I would have wanted to go there first anyway.
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