Shorty Episode: Don't Be Ashamed of Your Struggles and Have Empathy for Others

Sometimes I have things to say, and just want to say them rather than write them. So this is just a shortie episode, and it's just me and a mic. I talk about why you shouldn't be ashamed of your struggles, what everyone else is hiding, and why to have empathy for the rude person you run into. Enjoy!

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey

Transcription:
Hey everyone. Welcome to a solo episode of The Life Next Level podcast. This is kind of a new thing. And uh as you may or may not know, I, I am a blogger. I blog for myself about personal growth. I blog for others as well and a lot of times, a lot of the thoughts that I have going to my writing and I jotted notes down for later. I don't know if this will or won't, but I thought it would be cool to do, you know, we'll see how it goes. Maybe once a week. Just some short clips of some of the things that I'm thinking of that I think would help you um or would give you some uh good things to think about. And today I was thinking a lot about the struggles that some of his face that really, to be honest, I think we all face some struggles, but I wanted to talk about not being ashamed of your struggles. I don't want you or me or anyone to be ashamed when they feel like they're struggling because while you're struggling it seems that everyone else is happy and there's a part of us that feels like we shouldn't feel that way. So we feel ashamed. We feel like maybe we feel like a failure. We feel like we shouldn't feel that way and that we definitely should hide it or not show it, not talk about it. And you'd be forgiven really for thinking that way too because it's important to remember that it does seem like everyone else is happy, whether whether it's on social media, whether it's in person, you know, you're at a coffee shop, you're talking to someone, you're texting what we see from other people is their highlights and we don't see their lowlights and that's how we show too. Um so the first thing I really want to talk about because I have two points in this is that don't be ashamed of your struggles realize that everyone has them richard, poor, happy or sad, kind of rude. Any other polar opposites you can think of. They all have struggles even if they seem fine on the outside internally. They have struggles to, even though you may not see him again, we really only see people's highlights. And as a side note, uh, this is by the way why I tell people who are going through a really hard time. You know, maybe a difficult breakup or something not to spend too much time on social media and why I avoided it like the plague after my breakup. Because it can be really hard when you're going through a struggle to see everybody happy to see everybody in a relationship and happy, you know, in my case of a breakup and then you go out and you see everybody else happy and it hurts, it can be hard, so just kind of keep that in mind if and when you are going through the struggle of a bad one. But again, that's a side note. Again though, it's their highlights, that's not the truth, that's what they're showing how Erdely they're doing the same thing you're probably doing. But everybody is fighting a battle that you can't see. The second point I want to bring up on this on this topic is that it's another way to fundamentally understand and have empathy with every person you connect with, whether it's somebody that you know and are having a happy hour with, or maybe you're in line at the coffee shop or that you just pass by on the street, Maybe it's the guy yelling at someone else and you're wondering what's going on, the person honking and you think they're rude, the waitress that seems uh terrible at her job, or very rude to, they're all going through their own personal struggles, they're all fighting their own battles continuously and sometimes the opponent whoever or whatever that is, is winning and maybe that's happening that day, or maybe they had a just very bad morning and so instead of getting angry and irritated and getting mad back, sometimes it's it's a good idea to step back and have that thought and understand that if someone seems angry or rude or distracted there fighting that fight. Um and again, sometimes the opponent wins and it happens to all of us and it reminds me I'll leave you with a story. I don't know if you guys have read seven habits of highly effective people, but the author, Stephen Covey, and I don't know if this story was in that book, I haven't read that book for a long time, but I know I either read it from that book or another of his books or an article or something that he wrote, but he reminds me of or he wrote about the guy on the subway when he was riding a subway one day and an incredible paradigm shift that he had and I can't remember what the point of his story was, it might have been in a different direction, but what I took out of it is a little bit different and so I'm just going to kind of leave you with that. So Stephen Covey was on the subway and it was a sunday morning I believe and there were a bunch of people on there, I think it was in new york, so obviously a bunch of people and it was, it was a calm scene and all of a sudden a man and his kids entered and the guy sat down next to Stephen Covey and just shut his eyes and was kind of oblivious to what was going on. And while he did that his kids were running around like mad, crazy yelling back and forth, throwing stuff, grabbing stuff out of people's hands. It was a really disturbing and chaotic scene and in the guy still just sat oblivious with his eyes closed. So eventually, and I'm skipping a lot of the story, I'm just kind of getting to the punch line. So eventually Stephen Covey says, uh sir, are you going to do something about your Children? They're disturbing, everyone could, could you control them? And the guy kind of lifted his gaze, looked at Stephen Covey and and really looked around for the first time and was kind of acknowledging it for the first time and said something to the extent of you are right there. I should be doing something. We just came from the hospital where, where their mother died and I guess, I don't know really what to do or how to act and I guess they don't know how to handle it either. And then his paradigm shift that he saw things differently and he felt differently and, and and he thought differently. He was no longer irritated and what I take from that. So that's where I'm going in that story. I think, again, I think it goes on further and further, but and what I take from that is, uh, instead of judging, I'm sure everybody on the subway car was judging this guy and his Children saying he's a bad father, what are they doing and very irritated. But if you step back and just think maybe they're just going through their own form of personal hell right now. It's just a good way to look at stuff. So you don't get so irritated because I don't and I don't get so irritated. I have to pull that story back quite often in my head. So that's what I'm gonna leave you all with again. We all struggle, don't be ashamed of that struggle and realize that everyone that you pass on the street is going through their own personal struggles. So I'm gonna leave you with that. Let me know if you guys like these little ones, I'm gonna maybe try to do one or two a week, we'll see how it goes if if I have the time, but I appreciate you all. I hope you have a great day. Thanks for listening to the life next level of podcasts and we'll see you next time.