Empathy with Boundaries

Listener question: How do I have both empathy and boundaries?

Article on empathy and boundaries at heidigoehmann.com - https://heidigoehmann.com/articles/the-savior-complex-empathy-without-boundaries

 The difference between “hey, hold my emotions” and “withness”

Cognitive empathy:

Do they need us to see their perspective? Listen and ask questions about what they are thinking and how they see the world and their current experience. 

Emotional empathy:

Do they need us to see their feelings? Listen and ask questions that help them name their emotions and give a space to honor them without judgment. 

Boundary #1 – self-differentiation

Boundary #2 – no drama making, honor the degrees of separation

Boundary #3 - know your lens: perspective, bias, and assumptions

Boundary #4 – empathy doesn’t fix people

Boundary #5 – know your bandwidth 

Boundary #6 – be yourself in your kind and compassionate clothing

Boundary #7 – recognize all of our capacity for suffering

Mental Health Tool - Gut check practice

Series on empathy at heidigoehmann.com -

https://heidigoehmann.com/articles/igniting-empathy-inside-of-me

https://heidigoehmann.com/articles/how-do-we-talk-with-empathy

https://heidigoehmann.com/articles/bringing-empathy-to-social-media