Eps 174: Learning to be a more mindful communicator with Oren Jay Sofer

Today’s guest is Oren Jay Sofer, the author of Say What You Mean - A Mindful Approach to Non-Violent Communication. He leads retreats and workshops on mindful communication at meditation centres and education settings around the US. Oren is a graduate of the IMS Spirit Rock teacher training program. He holds a degree in comparative religion from Columbia University, teaches in the Insight Meditation community and is a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner and a certified trainer of non-violent communication. Oren creates mindfulness training programs for a number of organizations including Mindful Schools, Kaiser Permanente, and 10% Happier. He lives in Richmond, California. Join us!
 
"If we can’t actually listen to each other and have a meaningful conversation when we disagree, it’s impossible to work together to address the challenges that we’re facing”
 
“We can’t wait for the opportunities where presence is needed to practice presence.”
 
“Even when we can't meet our child's needs we can help them to know and recognize that their needs matter to us.”
 
“Our feelings are a reflection of our needs.”
 
What you’ll hear in this episode:

Being in response vs reaction

Communication as a way of navigating conflict mindfully

3 foundations for successful conversations and effective communication

The role of presence in communication

The ambient stress of raising a child

Owning our responses in times of stress

Exercising self-compassion in relation to parenting-related stress

Integrating moments of awareness into your day

Creating daily rituals into mindfulness

Mindfulness as a way to mitigate cumulative stress

Mindfulness as a way to be present in our relationships

Mindfulness as awareness and a way to raise our baseline kindness and presence

Preparing for parenting with mindfulness through practicing

Practice as a way of creating a new way of being

Creating awareness of the impact of our actions on others

Discussing our needs instead of blame

Being realistic about our ability to meet all of our child’s needs

Intention in communication and mindfulness

Approaching communication from a place of curiosity and care

Curiosity as a way of being

The need for intention to be genuine

Feelings of a reflection of needs

Increasing emotional literacy to enhance communication

Helping children to problem solve as an alternative to “consequences”

Connecting before correcting

Conflict as an opportunity for learning

Where to start when you realize you need to improve your communication

Learning to pause, be curious and consider the needs of others

Connection through perspective shift

 
Resources:
Say What You Mean book
Parenting From Your Heart: Sharing the Gifts of Compassion, Connection, and Choice (Nonviolent Communication Guides)
Text “guided” 44222 to sign up for a short ebook and free guided meditation series
 
Where to find Oren:
Website
Instagram
Facebook
Twitter
LinkedIn
Youtube
Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today’s guest is Oren Jay Sofer, the author of Say What You Mean - A Mindful Approach to Non-Violent Communication. He leads retreats and workshops on mindful communication at meditation centres and education settings around the US. Oren is a graduate of the IMS Spirit Rock teacher training program. He holds a degree in comparative religion from Columbia University, teaches in the Insight Meditation community and is a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner and a certified trainer of non-violent communication. Oren creates mindfulness training programs for a number of organizations including Mindful Schools, Kaiser Permanente, and 10% Happier. He lives in Richmond, California. Join us!

 

"If we can’t actually listen to each other and have a meaningful conversation when we disagree, it’s impossible to work together to address the challenges that we’re facing”

 

“We can’t wait for the opportunities where presence is needed to practice presence.”

 

“Even when we can't meet our child's needs we can help them to know and recognize that their needs matter to us.”

 

“Our feelings are a reflection of our needs.”

 

What you’ll hear in this episode:

Being in response vs reaction
Communication as a way of navigating conflict mindfully
3 foundations for successful conversations and effective communication
The role of presence in communication
The ambient stress of raising a child
Owning our responses in times of stress
Exercising self-compassion in relation to parenting-related stress
Integrating moments of awareness into your day
Creating daily rituals into mindfulness
Mindfulness as a way to mitigate cumulative stress
Mindfulness as a way to be present in our relationships
Mindfulness as awareness and a way to raise our baseline kindness and presence
Preparing for parenting with mindfulness through practicing
Practice as a way of creating a new way of being
Creating awareness of the impact of our actions on others
Discussing our needs instead of blame
Being realistic about our ability to meet all of our child’s needs
Intention in communication and mindfulness
Approaching communication from a place of curiosity and care
Curiosity as a way of being
The need for intention to be genuine
Feelings of a reflection of needs
Increasing emotional literacy to enhance communication
Helping children to problem solve as an alternative to “consequences”
Connecting before correcting
Conflict as an opportunity for learning
Where to start when you realize you need to improve your communication
Learning to pause, be curious and consider the needs of others
Connection through perspective shift

 

Resources:

Say What You Mean book

Parenting From Your Heart: Sharing the Gifts of Compassion, Connection, and Choice (Nonviolent Communication Guides)

Text “guided” 44222 to sign up for a short ebook and free guided meditation series

 

Where to find Oren:

Website

Instagram

Facebook

Twitter

LinkedIn

Youtube

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices