How to Split a Toaster: A Divorce Podcast About Saving Your Relationships

Mediation for a Reduced Conflict Divorce with Tami Sbar

April 27, 2021 10:00 - 46 minutes - 43.4 MB

Tami Sbar is a leading divorce mediator in Tampa, Florida, but she took a roundabout journey through the law to get there. She started her legal career as an Assistant State Attorney, working in both the domestic violence and the sex crimes divisions, in addition to felony court. She has her badge to prove it. After experiencing her own divorce, she became interested in the practice of family law, and in particular, the value of mediation as a priceless benefit for divorcing couple...

Our Happy Divorce: Building a Strong Post-Divorce Family with Ben Helfond and Nikki DeBartolo

April 20, 2021 10:00 - 48 minutes - 51.3 MB

Our guests today have worked hard to craft a loving and tight-knit family. Their effort to create that family has only intensified since their divorce in 2007. In an effort to help others see what’s possible, Ben Heldfond and Nikki DeBartolo created “Our Happy Divorce,” a book, channel, and community dedicated to building a healthy, happy, post-divorce modern family. This week on the show, Ben and Nikki share their perspectives on building a family as family membership changes. The...

Mediation Online: How the pandemic made your divorce less stressful with Susan Guthrie

March 23, 2021 10:00 - 46 minutes - 42.8 MB

The pandemic has been hard. On everyone. But one surprising silver lining: enterprising mediators have made the process easier, faster, and cheaper in many cases as a result of moving online. Sure, it might be just another Zoom meeting you have to sit through for hours. But it's a Zoom meeting from the comfort of your home. And strategic mediators are learning new skills they're using to manage online mediation to the great benefit of the separating party. To learn more, we've i...

Navigating Gray Divorce in the Family with authors Carol Hughes & Bruce Fredenburg

March 16, 2021 10:00 - 43 minutes - 40.3 MB

According to our guests today, late-in-life divorcées represent an unserved population. The complexities that come with navigating the divorce process, from adapting to a legal and financial system to communicating with the myriad relationships in and outside the family. How will you split a lifetime of assets? And most important to authors Carol Hughes and Bruce Fredenburg, how will you help your adult children and their children adapt to this new normal? Our guests today are auth...

Connecting — and RE-connecting — After Separation with Connection Coach Rachael Jaye

March 09, 2021 11:00 - 31 minutes - 29.3 MB

When one of us suffers, we all suffer. So says our guest, Rachael Jaye. Jaye is a certified Connection Coach and today she’s going to talk to us about her work helping to rehabilitate intimacy lost in separation. So, exactly what is a Connection Coach, and why might you need one? When we move through divorce, when trust is tested or broken, we might experience a loss of our ability exist in the space of connection or intimacy with other people. And, because relationships tend to br...

The Emotional Divorce with Dr. Margaret Rutherford

March 02, 2021 11:00 - 45 minutes - 42 MB

Divorce, by definition, is damaging. Taking apart a relationship impacts us far beyond the law. Today on the show, clinical psychologist Dr. Margaret Rutherford joins us to talk about how the stresses of divorce can sneak up on us in ways we might not expect. In addition to her practice, she’s the author of Perfectly Hidden Depression: How to Break Free from the Perfectionism that Masks Your Depression, and host of The SelfWork Podcast. Margaret, welcome to the Toaster. About Dr....

Staging your Epic Comeback with Divorce Coach Nikki Bruno

February 23, 2021 11:00 - 46 minutes - 42.6 MB

Are you ready to stage your Epic Comeback? Then it’s time for you to meet Nikki Bruno, divorce coach. “Get over your divorce before your divorce is over.” So says divorce coach Nikki Bruno in one of the programs she offers, guiding participants through the divorce process with a coach’s attention. And as a coach, she is dedicated to the internal work, the processing required to move through the grief of conflict, anxiety, fear, depression, and grief that comes alongside the legal s...

An App for Saving Your Relationships with Fayr founder Michael Daniels

February 16, 2021 14:00 - 42 minutes - 38.9 MB

A journey that started with divorce led home designer Michael Daniels to a career change, a long escalator, and a drive to reduce conflict for everyone facing the challenge of co-parenting. Today he joins us in the Toaster to tell us all about the fruits of his work: Fayr. “Family Advocacy is Your Responsibility” — or Fayr — is an app dedicated to making the experience of co-parenting better through communication, argument diffusion, and emotional support. With features like co-parenting ca...

Fayr: An App for Saving Your Relationships with founder Michael Daniels

February 16, 2021 11:00 - 42 minutes - 38.9 MB

A journey that started with divorce led home designer Michael Daniels to a career change, a long escalator, and a drive to reduce conflict for everyone facing the challenge of co-parenting. Today he joins us in the Toaster to tell us all about the fruits of his work: Fayr. “Family Advocacy is Your Responsibility” — or Fayr — is an app dedicated to making the experience of co-parenting better through communication, argument diffusion, and emotional support. With features like co-par...

Life as a Divorcée

February 09, 2021 11:00 - 36 minutes - 33.6 MB

We've talked to a string of guests, all specialists in some aspect of the divorce process supporting the legal process itself. And beyond the legal process, we’ve covered mental and emotional health support, how to protect your kids in the divorce process, how to redecorate, and even how to figure out who gets the family dog. This week, we’re finally talking to someone for whom all this matters most. Jamie Ainsworth is a recent divorcée and sits down in the Toaster to talk about h...

But What About the Dog?: Karis Nafte & Pet Custody Issues

February 02, 2021 14:00 - 42 minutes - 20.1 MB

Following up on last week’s conversation about dividing personal property, we realized that pets are considered property too. But you can’t actually split them, so what do you do? Turns out, that’s what the Pet Custody Expert is for. We invite Karis Nafte to the Toaster, a dog trainer and animal specialist who is also an internationally accredited family mediator who helps people figure out what Fido wants. Karis recognized the need for ‘dog centered mediation’ during divorce and now combin...

But What About the Dog?: Karis Nafte and Pet Custody Issues

February 02, 2021 11:00 - 42 minutes - 20.1 MB

Following up on last week’s conversation about dividing personal property, we realized that pets are considered property too. But you can’t actually split them, so what do you do? Turns out, that’s what the Pet Custody Expert is for. We invite Karis Nafte to the Toaster, a dog trainer and animal specialist who is also an internationally accredited family mediator who helps people figure out what Fido wants. Karis recognized the need for ‘dog centered mediation’ during divorce an...

The Momentous Matter of Material: Dividing Personal Property

January 26, 2021 11:00 - 30 minutes - 28.3 MB

You have split your schedule. You’ve untangled custody. You feel like you’re on top of the thousand tiny decisions that face you during your divorce process. And still, you stare down the bear: how do you split your stuff? It’s not easy. It’s emotional and exhausting. And it asks much of you in the form of patience and compromise. This week on the show, Seth shares strategies for approaching your personal property that may make your experience with your attorney, your mediator, an...

Protecting the Smallest Voices: Courtney Bowes and the Guardian ad Litem

January 19, 2021 11:00 - 41 minutes - 19.6 MB

From deep in the files labeled, “people you didn’t know you needed in your corner during your divorce,” we bring you the Guardian ad Litem. We welcome Courtney Bowes to the Toaster, a Guardian ad Litem who works with children to ensure their voices don’t get lost in an otherwise noisy process. Courtney has practiced family law exclusively since graduating from the University of Florida Levin College of Law in 2004. She has served as the featured lecturer at the Tampa Center for Wom...

Healthy Financial Conversations for a Healthy Divorce with Rhonda Noordyk

January 12, 2021 14:00 - 34 minutes - 31.9 MB

Rhonda Noordyk is the host of the Divorce Conversations for Women Podcast and CEO of the Women’s Financial Wellness Center. In her work, she helps women ask tough questions so that they get the answers that they need to navigate the divorce process. This week on the Toaster, Rhonda shares her insights on financial awareness in the marriage and why it is so important to a healthy communication practice, and a healthy divorce. Her practice is just a part one resource in the process, so she sh...

Healthy Financial Conversations for a Heathy Divorce with Rhonda Noordyk

January 12, 2021 12:00 - 34 minutes - 31.9 MB

Rhonda Noordyk is the host of the Divorce Conversations for Women Podcast and CEO of the Women’s Financial Wellness Center. In her work, she helps women ask tough questions so that they get the answers that they need to navigate the divorce process. This week on the Toaster, Rhonda shares her insights on financial awareness in the marriage and why it is so important to a healthy communication practice, and a healthy divorce. Her practice is just a part one resource in the process...

How Not to Be an A-Hole In Your Marriage with Brian Ronalds

January 05, 2021 11:00 - 35 minutes - 16.9 MB

Brian Ronalds is an actor turned writer/producer/director and is half of “The Ronalds Brothers." You can see Brian in the horror-comedy, Netherbeast Incorporated, directed by his brother, Dean, and in many other credits that do NOT include why he’s with us in the Toaster today. Brian joins us as the author of a series of books designed to guide you through your marriage assuming that you don’t actually want it to end: How Not to be an A-Hole Husband and Lose Your Wife, and (among o...

CrossTalk Holiday Bonus: The Law in Film

December 15, 2020 16:51 - 52 minutes - 48.6 MB

It’s time to cross wires! This week on the show, Pete and Seth bring Andy Nelson of The Next Reel Film Podcast to talk about their favorite experiences of the law in film. Part of CrossTalk from TruStory FM. The Next Reel Film Podcasts have been covering film and popular culture since 2011, dissecting movies in obsessive detail. They've even covered legal movies, but only as ignoramuses in the audience. This week, they get to find out how much they got right, and how much they sho...

The Pieces of Your Divorce Puzzle

December 08, 2020 10:00 - 36 minutes - 33.5 MB

Your divorce is a mystery. From the day you decide to pursue it to the day you and your former spouse sign on the dotted line and go your separate ways, it is a process that is unique to you and your specific situation. What’s more, it is as much a mystery to your attorney as it is to you. Discovery and mediation reveal the specific characteristics that make up your divorce, much like the pieces of a puzzle, until the picture is finally revealed. Along the way, you’ll be challenge...

How Do You Break the News to Family & Friends?

December 01, 2020 11:00 - 34 minutes - 16.4 MB

You might find yourself asking, “when will I get to the other side?” Divorce is long, but it’s a process. And processes absolutely come to an end. As hard as it is while you’re in it, as foggy as the end might seem, it’s out there. Along the way, you’ll come face to face with a lot of feelings. But they’re not your feelings. And that can get confusing. Parents may get mad about the divorce. Grandparents will feel loss about the grandkids. Dear friends will want to support you, peo...

Post-Divorce Relationships

November 24, 2020 10:00 - 33 minutes - 15.7 MB

Let’s start with the hard stuff: the bravest thing you can do is stand up for yourself and move forward. This week, we’re going to talk about the big piece of your divorce puzzle that is going to stand in the way of you doing just that: your relationships. What’s going to happen to your kids and their relationship with former grandparents? Step- and former step-spouses? Former step-siblings? What rights exist to keep these family relationships together? Like ripples in a pond, fam...

Pre-Divorce Paralysis

November 17, 2020 11:00 - 37 minutes - 34.8 MB

Love hurts. When you’re on the precipice of divorce, your relationship’s specific circumstances don’t matter as much as the grief and loss you feel as you prepare to walk away from your relationship. Studies show the brain reacts to a break-up experience the same way it reacts to breaking an addiction. That’s why it’s essential to understand what you’re going through and how grief impacts your divorce experience. This week on the show, we’re talking about the push and pull that com...

Redesigning Your Life with Jamie Blumenthal

November 10, 2020 11:00 - 40 minutes - 19 MB

You’re newly divorced. You’ve moved into a new place. Let’s say, to really put a cap on this exercise of imagination, you’re sitting on the floor one night eating sesame chicken straight out of the take out container by the light of a single lamp and you’re wondering — perhaps aloud — what am I going to do next? You’re going to start but rediscovering your own individual sense of style. This week on the show, Jamie Blumenthal of Blumenthal Designs joins us to talk about the power ...

Conscious Choices with Dr. Laura Gallaher

November 03, 2020 11:00 - 40 minutes - 19.1 MB

How can people be more intentional in the choices they’re making? If ever there was a time to develop the intellectual muscles that allow us to focus through a veil of emotion, it's when we’re facing the prospect of divorce. This week on the show, Dr. Laura Gallaher joins us to talk about how our brains and bodies work under this sort of stress. She is an organizational psychologist and has worked in the field of professional and personal development since 2005. She helps us unders...

Splitting the Holidays

October 27, 2020 04:00 - 34 minutes - 32.1 MB

Go on, sing it with us... "it's the most wonderful time of the year..." It's the most cherished of all divorce traditions, that special time when you sit down and ask: how do you split the holidays? Let’s get this out of the way early: if you have kids involved, splitting holidays is not easy. We’re not just talking about the winter holidays, mind you. What about winter break... Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, Easter, birthdays, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, summer break, Thanksgiving,...

What If It Wasn’t So Hard? Try Collaboration Before Litigation with Dr. Jeremy Gaies

October 20, 2020 09:00 - 49 minutes - 45.5 MB

Dr. Jeremy Gaies is a licensed psychologist and certified family mediator and author of “A Clear and Easy Guide to Collaborative Divorce”. He joins Seth Nelson and Pete Wright for a conversation on collaborative law and how a structured collaboration can lead to reduced complication and stress in your divorce. What is collaborative coordination? Who’s on your collaborative team and how do they work together on your divorce? What happens if collaboration breaks down and your divorce...

And now... you're alone

October 13, 2020 09:00 - 25 minutes - 12 MB

What are a few of the things that you never have time to do because of work, kids, or your relationship with your spouse? This week on the show, we’re turning the corner on the divorce itself and imagining a world in which you find yourself in the mysterious state of being alone. In your post-divorce, being alone involves some grief, sure. But it’s also about learning to live alone again. It’s about making your own space, decorating your home, taking a renewed ownership over your t...

Splitting the Unsplittable

October 01, 2020 05:00 - 37 minutes - 35.1 MB

Lives entwined are as complex as any machine. This week on the show, Seth Nelson and Pete Wright talk about how to navigate separating parts of your lives together that are incredibly complex, with a hypothetical courtroom exercise that will help you clearly understand your lawyer’s objective in supporting you in your divorce. What are your objectives in the divorce process and why is it so important for you to be fully-engaged all along the way? What is evidence, and how does it w...

Do you know where your money is?

September 29, 2020 10:00 - 38 minutes - 35.6 MB

Unraveling co-mingled finances in a separation starts by knowing where your money is. For many of us, answering that question can be much harder than it may seem. This week on Toaster, Seth Nelson and Pete Wright dive into the murky waters of divorce and your money. What do you do if you don’t know where your money is? How do you handle co-mingled finances? How can you make yourself more aware of your own financial situation? What if your spouse is hiding money — or debt — in your ...

The Post-COVID Divorce Dilemma

September 15, 2020 09:00 - 37 minutes - 34.4 MB

Unprecedented. If that word doesn’t earn word-of-the-year on every lexicographer’s list for 2020, language is broken. What happens if you’re living through these unprecedented times with a spouse and you’re struggling in your relationship? This week on the show, family law attorney Seth Nelson guides us through the process of navigating a dissolution of a marriage. How do you communicate when your communication is fractured? How do you parent together when you’re struggling to live...

Coming Soon: How to Split a Toaster

August 10, 2020 11:00 - 1 minute - 2.02 MB

Seth Nelson is a Tampa based family lawyer known for devising creative solutions to difficult problems. In "How to Split a Toaster," Nelson takes on the challenge of divorce with a central objective — saving the most important relationships with your family, your former spouse, and yourself. Subscribe to the show wherever you get your podcasts and join us later this month for our official launch! Links & Notes Nelson Koster Family Law How To Split a Toaster at TruStory FM