The Clock Starts Ticking

How long will it take for you to heal?

Do you have days when you feel so overwhelmed while grieving? 

Some days is it impossible to get through the simple stuff?.

By all means do not attach a timeline to your healing.

Do not allow anyone to attach a timeline to your healing.

There is no timeline for how long grief lasts, or how you should feel after a particular time. After 1 year it may still feel as if everything happened yesterday, or it may feel like it all happened a lifetime ago. 

Grievers will say...

All I want to do is go to sleep. But life is still going on around me. I yell at everyone in my household. I have no patience. "You need what?" "By when?" 
I remember thinking this about my family...Don't they know that I am grieving.  I don't care about that paperwork.  I don't care if you need help with your project.  I AM GRIEVING!

The process is going to take what it takes.   This grief will be with you for a while.  Trust us just because someone says it should be gone does not make that true for you.
 
• You are human.  Let yourself feel the pain.  All of it.  Even the ugly parts.  That means yes you may need to excuse yourself and go to a quiet place for a good cry.

• The truth is most likely if you are anything like us this does not feel natural.  We would go days without processing the pain and we know that things would start to build up.
• You are not the only one that has ever felt this way.  I promise you that you will not be the last.  But more importantly showing everyone around you that grieving will help them with their grief also.  Imagine that!
• Remember we never told you that this would be easy.  If not one of the most painful things you will do.  It will surely make the top five.
• The one thing that you can tell yourself is that you can do this. I am going to feel these feelings.
 
Things we know about grief:
• Grief is normal.  Grieving is natural. (even though it does not feel that way all of the time).  We have never been taught how to do it.
• Grief is emotional.

• You are allowed to process this pain.  

• You have to tell everyone around you what you want
• You also have to tell them what you don't want.