Why We Get Stuck and How to Unstick Ourselves [204]

Are you ready to deal with the things you’ve been avoiding and find out how to get unstuck? Joining us today on Flying Free is the incredible speaker, therapist, and author of The Science of Stuck, Britt Frank. Through Britt’s abusive relationship, substance abuse, and spiritual challenges she has learned that mental health is a commitment to reality. In this episode, we discuss why Britt wrote her book, the role of anxiety in our lives, why we have to be distinguished about our language use when talking about anxiety, fear, and worry, and why so many people choose to stay in abusive relationships for the benefits. There’s no such thing as an overreaction, only mismatched reactions, and Britt talks us through how to handle freeze response, manage panic attacks, and acknowledge shadow intelligence to become conscious decision-makers in our lives. Finally, we discuss why forgiveness is not essential to healing. Don’t miss out on this incredibly informative conversation!

Key Points From This Episode:

An overview of Britt’s book and why she wrote it. The unique summaries, dos and don’ts, and five-minute challenges Britt included at the end of every chapter and why. Why Britt believes that we need anxiety in order for our lives to work. The differences between anxiety, fear, and worry, and why we need to identify when we are experiencing them in order to access our choices. Why the uncomfortable truth is always better than a shiny lie. The rewards and benefits of staying stuck and why you need to rescue yourself. An example of one of the five-minute challenges in Britt’s book. What shadow intelligence is and how we can make our unconscious conscious. What Britt would say to survivors who have given up and why they are not unmotivated; their brains are stuck in a freeze response. Why forgiveness is not required to heal trauma and create new brain pathways and why it’s not possible when you are in fight or flight mode. Emotional adulthood vs. emotional childhood and why your reactions need to be matched to the action and situation. Britt’s beautiful reframing of panic attacks. 

Access the transcript, read the show notes, and/or ask Natalie a question here

Related Resources:

Britt’s book, which is one of my top three books I read in 2022: The Science of Stuck.Britt’s website, The Science of Stuck.My newest book, All the Scary Little Gods, is a spiritual memoir about healing from religious trauma and toxic programming. Are you wondering what is happening inside your own painful and confusing marriage? I wrote another book just for you called Is It Me? Making Sense of Your Confusing Marriage: A Christian Woman’s Guide to Hidden Emotional and Spiritual Abuse. Flying Free is my online membership program designed for Christian women in emotionally abusive marriages. Whether you want to stay well in your marriage or leave, we want to equip and support you through this program.Flying Higher is my online membership program for divorced Christian women. Come rebuild your life after divorce with women just like you!Support the Flying Free podcast AND get in on monthly deep-dive discussions with podcast guests by joining the Flying Free Podcast Club for a $5 monthly donation HERE. (Members of Flying Free and Flying Higher can join these discussions FREE. Just reach out to me, [email protected], and we'll get you set up!) 

Britt Frank, MSW, LSCSW, SEP is a clinician, educator and trauma specialist. She speaks and writes widely about the mental health myths that keep us stuck and stressed. Britt received her BA from Duke University and her MSW from the University of Kansas, where she later became an award winning adjunct professor. She is a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner and Level 3 trained in the Internal Family Systems therapeutic model. Britt was a primary therapist at a drug and alcohol treatment center, an inpatient therapist at a children’s psychiatric hospital, and now owns a private practice. You can find Britt on Instagram or on her website www.scienceofstuck.com.