This is a recording of a full seminar dedicated to the topic of divorcing a narcissistic partner, held by three experts - Sam Vaknin, Sara Davison and Richard Grannon.




(00:01) Introduction to the Seminar


(05:33) The Beginning of Sara Davison’s Section: Personal Story


(08:15) The Emotions of a Heartbreak and the Hamster Wheel Questions


(11:32) Divorce Can Be a Great Opportunity if You Decide to Take It


(14:06) Divorce Statistics and the Reasons of Divorce


(15:20) The Stages of Divorce


(20:34) How to Take Control Over Your Life Whilst Going Through the Stages


(24:34) Key 1. Take Responsibility


(26:30) Key 2. Get Clarity


(27:58) Key 3. Take Back Your Control


(29:32) Key 4. Focus on Moving Forward Positively


(33:00) Managing Conflict With Your Ex


(35:59) Quality Question


(38:13) The “Flip It” Technique and the Small Steps


(41:44) Less Bridget Jones and More Sex and the City James Bond


(44:47) Be a Role Model


(46:51) Let Go


(48:56) The Beginning of Richard Grannon’s Section


(51:41) The Codependence is Rooted in the Formative Years


(54:48) You Will Have to Redefine Love to Recover (an Exercise)


(57:36) Reformulating Your Boundaries and Embracing Your Shadow Self


(1:01:48) The Idea That a Codependent Has No Control is Venomous


(1:03:26) The Formation of a Narcissist/psychopath/predator in Brief


(1:07:42) The Trauma Bonding Effect


(1:12:28) Divorcing From Your Internal Avatar of That Person and Coming Out of the Story


(1:15:53) Answering Questions


(1:18:33) The Beginning of Sam Vaknin’s Section


(1:20:40) Interchangeability of People for a Narcissist


(1:25:38) We Are All Narcissists to Some Extent


(1:27:24) You Can Never Really Divorce a Narcissist


(1:30:09) The Four Foundations of a Narcissist Concentration Camp: Vulnerability, Addiction and Trauma


(1:34:14) The Four Foundations of a Narcissist Concentration Camp: Adaptation


(1:35:36) Sam Talks About What He’s Discovered About the Victims of a Narcissistic Abuse Part 1


(1:39:42) Sam Talks About What He’s Discovered About the Victims of a Narcissistic Abuse Part 2


(1:42:15) Why You Need to Discard Malignant Optimism


(1:44:33) You Need to Get Rid of Mythologizing


(1:47:44) Sam Reads His List of Observations


(1:50:51) You Are Grieving and Mourning Five Things, Not One


(1:52:22) Sam Continues With Recommendations


(1:56:44) No Contact With the Abuser


(1:58:55) Who Are the Inverted Narcissists?


(2:02:39) Narcissist as a Child Part 1


(2:04:43) Narcissist as a Child Part 2


(2:08:45) The End