Episode 50: She Healed a Horrifying Childhood and Transformed it into a Beautiful Gift

Melissa unpacks details of a childhood that was unpredictable, intense, and full of turmoil. She delved into what it was like to grow up in an alcoholic household that was very abusive, particularly after her mother’s death. She explained that her parents were divorced, and while living with her mother, at 8 years old, mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer suddenly and deteriorated quickly, this led Melissa to return to her father’s care. She spoke about the emotional abuse that she endured, the manipulation she had to take from her father, and though she was the youngest at home, she took a protective stance and wasn’t afraid to speak up, call the police, or handle the landlords at various times. At the young age of 12 she attempted suicide, having a tough time tolerating all the abuse, witnessing abuse and all the unpleasant facets of what took place inside the home, while masking it all in the public eye. At age 14, Melissa left home and charted her own path, continued to compartmentalize her feelings, experiences, and pain. Through her journey which encompassed Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), she has relied heavily on therapy, and has worked on managing themes of overcompensating with independence, not letting people in, not being able to admit to being a victim of trauma until adulthood and processing all the trauma that she endured along the way. Her key message to the listeners is that: you can always figure out whatever is in front of you, it may not go as expected, but you can sort through it; only go where you are happy, do the things that make you happy; take ownership of your “stuff”; become aware of the power of labels and how you might unknowingly label and limit yourself in the process.