Brilliant Observations

So We're Punching Stewardesses Now? | Brilliant Observations 199

Would you tell a friend when she’s being annoying? Our fear-y (fear-based-theory) is that you wouldn’t even notice. This is America, after all. We’re losing all the filters now — behavior, language, boundaries, civility, common sense… and now, airplane etiquette.    Amy gets an unexpected lunch invite from an old friend for no reason. Is this just to catch up (please, please, please), or will Amy walk away with a new Life Coach (oh, no)? Check please! Share your thoughts at @ListenBrilli...

So We're Punching Stewardesses Now? | Brilliant Observations Podcast

Would you tell a friend when she’s being annoying? Our fear-y (fear-based-theory) is that you wouldn’t even notice. This is America, after all. We’re losing all the filters now — behavior, language, boundaries, civility, common sense… and now, airplane etiquette.    Amy gets an unexpected lunch invite from an old friend for no reason. Is this just to catch up (please, please, please), or will Amy walk away with a new Life Coach (oh, no)? Check please! Share your thoughts at @ListenBrilli...

Poop Tabs | Brilliant Observations 198

Ethan makes it through the high school gauntlet unscathed (congratulations!), only to slip into a celebratory stupor courtesy of Dr. Dad's Magic Beer Pong. What is wrong with these people? Missy spends some quality time with her relatives, and learns along with the other Brilliant party guests that murders walk among them. To turn them in to the authorities, like and subscribe on Apple Podcasts. then comment at @ListenBrilliant, @BrillObsSquad, www.BrilliantObservations.com, or BrilliantOb...

All Gross Things (and a Cocktail) | Brilliant Observations Podcast

All Gross Things (and a Cocktail) | Brilliant Observations 197

White People, Knock It Off | Brilliant Observations 196

There are two kinds of people in this world: those who love yard sales, and everyone else. This week, we revisit the doomed notion of hawking one's castoffs for pennies. Plus, Missy gets verklempt over a particularly poignant fan letter, and Amy harps on more things from 1940 that weren't really a thing.  Join the nonsense @ListenBrilliant, BrilliantObservations.com, or [email protected]. Find swag at TeePublic.com/BrilliantObservations, or support us at Patreon.com/Brilliant...

What Happens in the Treehouse | Brilliant Observations 195

This week, we talk masturbation. Again. Because let's face it, you're not downloading for an update on the Gaza Strip.  As always, we beg for your feedback in whatever form you care to give it: on social media at @ListenBrilliant, in our Facebook group BrillObsSquad, via email at [email protected], on our web site at BrilliantObservations.com, by buying shirts and swag at TeePublic.com/brilliantobservations, or by direct support at Patreon.com/BrilliantObservations, or just b...

What Happens in the Treehouse | Brilliant Observations

This week, we talk masturbation. Again. Because let's face it, you're not downloading for an update on the Gaza Strip.  As always, we beg for your feedback in whatever form you care to give it: on social media at @ListenBrilliant, in our Facebook group BrillObsSquad, via email at [email protected], on our web site at BrilliantObservations.com, by buying shirts and swag at TeePublic.com/brilliantobservations, or by direct support at Patreon.com/BrilliantObservations, or just b...

Blame It On My Juice | Brilliant Observations 194

It's the Generous Lover episode, featuring all the males we'd like to "aya-eeee." Missy gives a parenting shout out, and Amy mixes up Soledad O'Brien with Soleil Moon Frye (don't we all?). Plus, beach house faucets, Biden photo fails and the Amish girl takes a turn. Buckle up, kids. This is one episode where we can't stop laughing. (MmmmNOPE!) Join the conversation online at @ListenBrilliant, @BrillObsSquad, www.BrilliantObservations.com, or [email protected]. Find swag at Te...

Show Me Your Crisper | Brilliant Observations 193

Detroit pizza. Roller skating. Cocktail parties. And a crisper drawer that borders on porn? This week, Amy pushes her weight loss into high gear, while Missy celebrates her milestone 500th Peleton ride (to great fanfare). Then, we look back over the past 11 months with nostalgia for all the things we as a society no longer know how to do, like make small talk, walk outside without a mask, shut up at the nail salon, or use social media without a “content team.” Join the conversation online ...

Aging Sucks | Brilliant Observations 192

Melissa loses her "button," Mallory fights her fears, and Amy refuses to check a suspicious mole. It's all part of the glamorous job on the middle-aged BrillObs Mom Squad.  Join the conversation online at @ListenBrilliant, @BrillObsSquad, www.BrilliantObservations.com, or [email protected]. Find swag at TeePublic.com/BrilliantObservations, or support us at Patreon.com/BrilliantObservations. We'll be glad you did. (You might be, too.)

Amy's Box vs Melissa's Balls | Brilliant Observations 191

They say you're the average of the five people you spend the most time with. Fortunately for you, we don't count in your total. Listen and laugh as we talk weight loss, poor social media habits, hateful father-daughter photos and waaaay too many jeans.    Join the conversation online at @ListenBrilliant, @BrillObsSquad, www.BrilliantObservations.com, or [email protected]. Find swag at TeePublic.com/BrilliantObservations, or support us at Patreon.com/BrilliantObservations. W...

Be Honest, How Do I Look? | Brilliant Observations 190

Amy buys some questionable glasses. Missy can’t decide what’s better — telling a friend the cold hard truth, or being a friend and choosing to “ack…cen…tuate the positive.” Spoiler Alert: we’re not positive. Amy recaps her recent Board of Directors meeting. And our fan favorite segment, Hey, Whatcha Watchin? returns with Netflix reviews of The One, Thunder Force, Yellowstone, Godzilla vs Kong, and the Unified Theory of Stuart, courtesy of a fictitious DNA test.  And yes, Amy still can’t ge...

There's a Hummer at the End of this Podcast | Brilliant Observations Podcast

Why at the end of every podcast we have does it Just. Get. GOOD? This week, Amy learns what a hummer is. Or *does* she? Melissa begins the five year process of decluttering her house. And everyone reminisces about the pleasures of Food Factory Tours of Yore. It’s all part of our Things We Do For Our Kids series, also known as Why I Can’t Retire. Join the conversation online at @ListenBrilliant, @BrillObsSquad, www.BrilliantObservations.com, or [email protected]. Find swag at ...

German Words FTW | Brilliant Observations 188

It’s Spring Break 2021, and like all good shut-ins, Missy tries her hand at an in-person, socially distanced, highly vaccinated, folding soccer chair, we’re done when I say we’re done Driveway Social Hour. (Stuart even brought his five favorite jokes.) Meanwhile, in Southtowne, Amy makes grand plans for a covid safe “beach bubble,” only to watch the bubble burst as her friend catches the virus. (He’s back home now and doing fine.) It’s enough to drive a girl to search for meaning… in unprono...

Siblings or Dating? | Brilliant Observations 187

There once was a man from Nantucket. Who had a podcast and said f$@! it. But Apple objected and fans soon defected, so now he cries tears like a bucket. What can we say, Dear Listener? We gave this limerick our “whole ass.” Think you can do better? Then grab your sibling (or your date) and join us online at @ListenBrilliant, @BrillObsSquad, www.BrilliantObservations.com, or [email protected]. Find swag at TeePublic.com/BrilliantObservations, or support us at Patreon.com/Brill...

People Love To Help | Brilliant Observations 186

It starts with a little harmless fat shaming — okay, not that little. (And not that harmless.) Then we move on to ripping the Royals. Next up? Missy tears Amy a new one for her lack of automotive maintenance, complete disregard for her own children’s safety and total refusal to adopt any reasonable standard of adulthood. Truth be told, she might have a point.   We wrap up our judges episode ever by doing what we do best — judging YOU, Dear Listener, for so rarely keeping in touch. Visit us...

Wait and See Kinda Girl | Brilliant Observations 185

So it turns out, Lionel Ritchie can get it. Amy continues to slow-walk her possible brain break diagnosis. And Melissa's Miracle Boobs™ return for a command performance — this time with *No Bra.* What can we say, Dear Listener? We just love you that much.  Care to return the feeling? Visit us on all the socials at @ListenBrilliant, @BrillObsSquad, www.BrilliantObservations.com, or [email protected]. Find swag at TeePublic.com/BrilliantObservations, or support us at Patreon.co...

You Should Get That Looked At

Dear Listener, who's your first? Missy unlocks the vault to see if anybody besides Stuart is actually in there. Spoiler Alert: she locks him back in. (Poor Stu.) THANK YOU to our newest Patreon Subscribers, our longest fans, and our loudest supporters. We love you way more than we ever admit.  Join the nonsense online @ListenBrilliant, @BrillObsSquad, www.BrilliantObservations.com, or [email protected]. Find swag at TeePublic.com/BrilliantObservations, or support us at Patreo...

Take to the Bed | Brilliant Observations 183

After a week I mean month I mean year like we've had, there's only one thing left to do.  Find us everywhere @ListenBrilliant, online at BrilliantObservations.com, at Patreon.com/BrilliantObservations, at TeePublic.com/BrilliantObservations, on Facebook at BrillObsSquad or via email at [email protected].

We See You Through Our Magic Mirror | Brilliant Observations 182

Our eyes are everywhere this week, Dear Listener. But mostly between 11 and 32 inches. Find all the juicy details at BrilliantObservations.com, [email protected], @ListenBrilliant, on Facebook at BrillObsSquad, on Patreon.com/BrilliantObservations, and at TeePublic.com/BrilliantObservations. 

Get In the Metal Box | Brilliant Observations 181

From sourdough and cannibalism to Chris Hemsworth’s prosthetic penis, we dive deep into the paralyzing reality of “healthy fears.” Suck it, sharks. We're buying a beach house.  Join the nonsense online @ListenBrilliant, @BrillObsSquad, www.BrilliantObservations.com, or [email protected]. Find swag at TeePublic.com/BrilliantObservations, or support us at Patreon.com/BrilliantObservations.

Say Cheese | Brilliant Observations 180

Friends in need level-jump their testicle-and-lady-part questions straight over Melissa’s head in an attempt to get to Dr. Stuart. Her advice? If you’re taking two days to eat an orange, you’re doing something wrong. Join us as we eviscerate all the cheeses, catchup on the beach house hunt and debate the horrors of wedgie-inducing underpants. Weigh in on the thong-vs-boy short-vs-nudist debate at @ListenBrilliant, @BrillObsSquad, www.BrilliantObservations.com, or BrilliantObservations@gmail...

Grape: It's My Jam | Brilliant Observations 179

Some things you just don’t talk about. Like loving crunchy peanut butter. Hating the beach. Or meeting a flaccid penis. As usual, Amy is convinced with no evidence whatsoever that the mythic “limp dick” heard tell in every comedy club and Hollywood storyline is actually a fallacy. I mean, have you *ever* heard anyone who has ever had this happen — male, female, friend, foe? Perhaps, dear listener, you will be the one to set the record ram-rod straight for us with some prized BrillObsSquad fe...

Wanna Pee On Me? | Brilliant Observations 178

Grab your Go Bag, kids. It’s time to clip-in to your Peletons and ride through the weirdest sex talk ever. (Save us, Carson Daly!) Join us as we distract ourselves from the day’s events with sourdough, Bridgerton, and a jaunty, judgy dive into the why of watersports. Pee and sex. Poo and sex. Sushi and sex. Sex and sex. It’s enough to push a girl to eat tongue. #CarbGood If you're a skipper, this week, we cover... College campus part 2 Melissa’s gray heart Peleton therapy Carson Dal...

Atta Girl! | Brilliant Observations 177

Stuart accidentally swallows a dog toy, while Missy discovers the surprising power of even the least bit of encouragement. Just ask a flaccid penis. Hey, oh! This week's conversation brings talk of hellfire, exercise induced endorphins, and novel writing updates. Plus, Missy and Stu wave their last (almost?) goodbyes to the Florida house, and Amy and Melissa definitively confirm it’s the gift — not the thought — that counts.  Join the conversation online at @ListenBrilliant, @BrillObsSqu...

Snow Kidding | Brilliant Observations Podcast 176

Creepy things your gynecologist says, fight-stopping boobs, and wintry tales from a joyless childhood — all courtesy of your favorite gal pal (and President of the Shut Up I Don't Wanna Be In Your Club Club) Missy B! Tune in as we grab 2021 by the pillow and hit snooze a few times.  Join the conversation online at @ListenBrilliant, @BrillObsSquad, @GirlGotMic, or www.BrilliantObservations.com, or [email protected]. Donate at Patreon.com/BrilliantObservations. You know. For th...

Fare Thee Well, 2020 | Brilliant Observations 175

Get lost, 2020. We'd rather focus on Christmas recaps, Tik Tok obsession, creamy eggs, canine labia — you know, the good stuff. Give a listen. You'll wonder why you did.  Join the conversation online at @ListenBrilliant, @BrillObsSquad, @GirlGotMic, or www.BrilliantObservations.com. Email us for a chance to win eternal glory at BrilliantObservations.com. Or just offer us a measly donation at Patreon.com/BrilliantObservations. You know. For the kids.     Support Brilliant Observations P...

Just the Tip | Brilliant Observations 174

Yuletide tipping got you in a quandry? Never fear! Just climb aboard our Slippery Little Sleigh™ for a holiday ride you won’t soon forget.  Join our Facebook group BrillObs Squad (#BrillObsSquad), or connect with us on all the socials @ListenBrilliant. Donate to support us on Patreon here (https://bit.ly/3eSfu3F), or buy and wear your own swag to support us on TeePublic (search Brilliant Observations).

Surprise Vomit: the Worst Surprise | Brilliant Observations 173

It's the annual Christmas Party, friends! Time for another game of Guess Who's Too Drunk To Be Here. ("Check, please.") All that, please the perils of buying furniture, hiring housecleaners, and living with gastrointestinal distress.  Join the conversation online at @ListenBrilliant, @BrillObsSquad, @GirlGotMic, or www.BrilliantObservations.com. Email us for a chance to win eternal glory at BrilliantObservations.com. Or just offer us a measly donation at Patreon.com/BrilliantObservations....

Hannukah Cheesesteak

Hannukah Cheesesteak

No White Clothes Ever! | Brilliant Observations 171

Paging Mommie Dearest…in this week’s trip down Childhood Trauma Lane, Missy revisits her mother’s cleanliness-based ban on anything white because, quote, “you’ll just ruin it.” Feel the love as we break Missy’s children of their birthright, courtesy of a brand new white sweatshirt. Well. White...for now.   Join the conversation online at @ListenBrilliant, @BrillObsSquad, @GirlGotMic, or www.BrilliantObservations.com. Email us for a chance to win eternal glory at BrilliantObservations.com. ...

Bonus Thanksgiving 2020 | A Brilliant Observations Bonus

Here's a little something from the ones you love. We couldn't help ourselves. Enjoy, Dears!! Find us at @ListenBrilliant, [email protected], BrillObsSquad and Patreon.com/BrilliantObservations

Table for Four? Happy Thanksgiving! | Brilliant Observations 169

Looking for a laugh while you clean the house, set the table, prep the food or...let's be honest, grab a menu and the remote ("Alexa, call GrubHub")? We've got you covered. We're releasing the show two days early so you'll have ample time to delay making your favorite holiday dishes. Like what you hear? Share it with family and friends who are hopefully stuck home alone just like you — #STAYtheFUCKhome — so they can join the sidesplitting, "sides"giving fun. We'll even bring the creamed cor...

Stay the F@!# Home | Brilliant Observations 168

The only people traveling for Thanksgiving are death wish assholes. Sadly, Amy was temporarily among them.  Listen with disgust as we talk holiday traditions decimated by covid and other peppy stories. And please note: we recorded and edited this episode roughly three weeks before Thanksgiving... so in the time it took to release the show, Amy has since changed her mind about travel. She and her family will all be celebrating the holiday at their individual homes this year.  So as it tu...

Stay the F@!# Home | Brilliant Observations 169

Parenting Is a Marathon, Not a Sprint | Brilliant Observations 167

Wash your hands, kids! Melissa takes Ethan on a college road trip, and worries she may have reached the end of her parenting journey. Naturally, our thoughts turn to last week's Fan Favorite, the Humping Phase, otherwise known as the magical milestone when kindergarteners learn to twerk it during naptime. (Trust her. She’s certified.) Join us as we work through the ups and downs (as well as the up-down-up-down) of planning for a covid soaked everything, including Thanksgiving, Christmas, c...

Time To Choke the Chicken | Brilliant Observations 166

Face it. We all need a little relief at this point. But holy hand cream, Jeffrey Toobin. Did you really have to jerk it at work? You be the judge, along with Amy that is, who makes no BONEs about her opinion. So grab the tissues, pervs. It’s going to be a GRIPPING conversation. Plus, if it wasn’t obvious enough already, we do everything we can to avoid talk of the election altogether with our first annual Best Of the Year list — 2020 style. Which, of course, means it kinda sucks.  Join t...

Eating from the Trash Can | Brilliant Observations 165

Missy takes a road trip and rekindles her love of loosely baked cookie toppings. Then, we see who has what it takes to lead a cult. Hint — if you're willing to place a political sign in your yard, you might not be that far off. We're up, we're down, we're eating off the ground. Must be 2020!  Join the conversation online at @ListenBrilliant, @BrillObsSquad, @GirlGotMic, or www.BrilliantObservations.com. Email us for a chance to win eternal glory at BrilliantObservations.com. Or just offer u...

Are You Burned Out?

Missy drops some big news about E's college prospects...and Amy drops to the floor. Spoiler alert: burnout is real, and it's spectacular. Plus Facebook overshares, Australian downloads and general malaise. It's all part of our Third Act. Sorta. Rate us 5 stars on Apple Podcasts with a flick of the finger. #OhMy Join the FB group at BrillObsSquad, or support us with a one-time tip in any amount at Patreon.com/BrilliantObservations. www.BrilliantObservations.com BrilliantObservations@gmai...

Do You Meditate? | Brilliant Observations 163

Missy has a Vulcan mind-meld with her Foxy Boxy Peleton instructor. Amy makes good with Jon Bukenas. And hypnotists everywhere beware — we're skeptical. Plus listener feedback from Bonnie Frank of the Business Fabulous Podcast, Missy's anniversary gift and the wonders of alternative meditation. Support us on Patreon.com/BrilliantObservations, or just subscribe. That works, too. Find us on the socials @ListenBrilliant and join our Facebook group, BrillObs Squad. www.BrilliantObservations.co...

Do You Porn? Yeah, Right. | Brilliant Observations 162

So, our humble little podcast is rising in the comedy charts. This week, we discuss porn. Coincidence? And before you get all hot and bothered with anticipation, allow us to disappoint. Our discussion focuses on all you liars out there. At least according to Missy's "research." Add to the debate on Facebook at BrillObs Squad, or support us on www.Patreon.com/BrilliantObservations . And we'll keep coming  every week. (See what we did there?) [email protected] www.BrilliantO...

Get Out of My Stye, Cock Pocket | Brilliant Observations 161

Missy kicks off Yom Kippur with a traditional apology while Amy's eye gently weeps. Don't worry. It's just puss.  Learn the secrets behind chaffles — a delightfully savory cross between a grilled cheese and a waffle — and the best way to combat college application stress in the time of covid. Still want more? Find us on Facebook at BrillObs Squad and join the group for free.  www.BrilliantObservations.com

Do Just One Thing More | Brilliant Observations

Even the tomatoes are pornographic. Wanna see? Join our Facebook group BrillObs Squad for extra content.

Amy's Life in the U-Bend

From bad parenting to friendship mishaps and back again, Missy and Amy chat up what it means to dive into "the Real." You know, kinda like we do with you every week. 

Missy’s New York State of Mind | Brilliant Observations 158

Old rivalries die hard as Missy and Amy recall their NHL loving childhoods growing up in the mid-Atlantic coast. Spoiler alert — only one of these ladies chose the right team.  Find us on all the socials at @ListenBrilliant, or visit Patreon and search Brilliant Observations to show us a token of your support.  Have a topic idea, question for the hosts or general feedback? Give us a shout at [email protected]. 

BOP157-The-Glass-Eye-Is-The-Final-Straw

There are no right answers anymore…especially when it comes to developmentally immature brains. (I’m looking at you, Brian.) Follow the bouncing eyeball as we navigate teens losing phone privileges, teens losing college privileges, and Amy losing marital privileges (hey now!). All that, plus Missy loses her P…iano, and briefly considers pooping in the kitchen sink.    Support Brilliant Observations Podcast Join our Facebook group BrillObs Squad (#BrillObsSquad), or connect with us on...

The Glass Eye Is the Final Straw | Brilliant Observations 157

There are no right answers anymore…especially when it comes to developmentally immature brains. (I’m looking at you, Brian.) Follow the bouncing eyeball as we navigate teens losing phone privileges, teens losing college privileges, and Amy losing marital privileges (hey now!). All that, plus Missy loses her P…iano, and briefly considers pooping in the kitchen sink.    Support Brilliant Observations Podcast Join our Facebook group BrillObs Squad (#BrillObsSquad), or connect with us on...

Take My Piano, Please! | Brilliant Observations 156

Missy bemoans the hardships of an unwanted grand piano. Plus lackluster beach vacation memories. All this and moooooooorre! Join us on Facebook at BrillObs Squad for insider jokes, links, conversation and connection.  Find us on Twitter, Insta and everywhere at @ListenBrilliant or @AmyFugazi .