Ep. 20: Forming a Healthy Relationship with Goals

How can we set and stick to our goals without getting overly attached to them or punishing ourselves if we backslide? Dr. Hanson and Forrest explore how we can feel more successful by noticing the many small goals we accomplish each day, and fully internalizing that experience so it becomes a lasting resource.
If you'd like to start making real, positive changes to your brain and your life, but you don't have a lot of extra time, then you may want to check out Rick Hanson's new program: Just One Minute. Use the code BEINGWELL at checkout for 10% off the purchase price.
Sponsor Message: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.
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The material in this podcast comes in large part from our book Resilient: How to Grow an Unshakable Core of Calm, Strength, and Happiness. If you like the podcast, you'll love the book!
Timestamps:
0:50: Why is having a healthy relationship with our goals so important for mental health?
4:30: How can we achieve a more healthy relationship with our goals?
6:35: The social pressures that help us feel unsuccessful.
8:30: What are process goals?
9:55: What are outcome goals?
10:20: The many opportunities to meet our goals.
11:40: Hacking the natural pleasure systems in the brain.
14:25: If we have so many opportunities to experience success, why don’t we?
17:50: What about when we aren’t successful? How can we better manage those feelings of failure?
21:30: Risking the “dreaded experience.”
24:30: Isn’t the fear of failure really motivating though?
29:50: Recap

How can we set and stick to our goals without getting overly attached to them or punishing ourselves if we backslide? Dr. Hanson and Forrest explore how we can feel more successful by noticing the many small goals we accomplish each day, and fully internalizing that experience so it becomes a lasting resource.

If you'd like to start making real, positive changes to your brain and your life, but you don't have a lot of extra time, then you may want to check out Rick Hanson's new program: Just One Minute. Use the code BEINGWELL at checkout for 10% off the purchase price.

Sponsor Message: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.

Connect with the show:

The material in this podcast comes in large part from our book Resilient: How to Grow an Unshakable Core of Calm, Strength, and Happiness. If you like the podcast, you'll love the book!

Timestamps:

0:50: Why is having a healthy relationship with our goals so important for mental health?

4:30: How can we achieve a more healthy relationship with our goals?

6:35: The social pressures that help us feel unsuccessful.

8:30: What are process goals?

9:55: What are outcome goals?

10:20: The many opportunities to meet our goals.

11:40: Hacking the natural pleasure systems in the brain.

14:25: If we have so many opportunities to experience success, why don’t we?

17:50: What about when we aren’t successful? How can we better manage those feelings of failure?

21:30: Risking the “dreaded experience.”

24:30: Isn’t the fear of failure really motivating though?

29:50: Recap