119. Embracing Darkness and Unpacking Grief: Finding the Unexpected Gifts in Trauma

Welcome to Zimmerman Podcast Episode 119

I remember when Brian and I moved to Nashville after our year of traveling the country in an Airstream, and I was convinced that putting down new roots in a new city would be the final step in our healing journey. Both individually and together.

I thought Brian would finally be able to meet new friends, get excited about getting a job, we could go on dates to places we've never been before, and enjoy the culture of a big city.

There was nothing I wouldn’t do to help us move forward. I just didn’t realize at the time that the one thing I couldn’t do was move Brian forward with me. And I tried.

Each time we had a conversation where I was ramping us up to move forward, it felt like the two of us were sitting in a car, and I had my foot pedal to the metal on the gas. And Brian not only had his foot on the break, but he had the car in reverse. He didn’t just want to stand still, he wanted to go backward. I’ve got my eyes on the road ahead, and he’s looking out the rear view mirror.

And we’re just stuck.

Brian’s regret was keeping his eyes fixed on the past.

Most times, I think regret is just unfelt grief.

And regret is totally unproductive. Focusing on what you wish happened differently has no power to keep it from happening again.

The best way to move forward with clarity is to reexamine those memories and events in your life that have brought you grief. Not so you can wallow in what you wish had happened differently, but so you can learn what has made you who you are. Only then can you grow into something more.

So what does it look like to honor our past trauma and use it to move forward with wisdom and clarity?

Let’s talk about it in today's podcast.

EPISODE 119 TOPICS:
- What does it look like to honor past trauma
- Comparative trauma does no one any good, meaning, uncovering the events that were traumatic to you.
- Trust what hurts. Grieve deeply so you don’t regret. Even trauma can be transformed into growth when you honor it with your attention.

LINKS:
The Path Back to You
When you feel like you're losing your mind, I’m here to help you restore your soul.
In “The Path Back to You” I share with you my own personal story of struggle, trauma, etc. as a sacred offering. My hope is that through my story, you can better see yourself. I share with you my darkest moments and the steps I took to find my light– the light I had dimmed for most of my life.
Throughout all the heartache I’ve endured, I’ve finally found peace. And I want to share my roadmap with you. And just for my podcast listeners, use code PATH15 for 15% off.
Join me on The Path Back to You here: jessicazimmerman.com/the-path-back-to-you-course

My Ted Talk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Z_ax0vCBUw

My Best Selling Memoir, Sleeping with a Stranger: https://jessicazimmerman.com/sleeping-with-a-stranger

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