Waiting for you artwork

Waiting for you

40 episodes - English - Latest episode: over 1 year ago -

The podcast where we talk infertility, hope, loss and courage.Here we will share stories of families who have faced a difficult journey through conception, pregnancy or postpartum.I want to honour these stories and have them be heard and I want to bring it all - the tears, the hope, the despair and the joy.

Personal Journals Society & Culture infertility birth ivf pregnancy loss courage
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Episodes

Female and male factor infertility with Rachael

November 22, 2022 08:00 - 45 minutes - 30.9 MB

In this episode Rachael shares her experience of infertilty and a diagnosis of both female and male factor infertility which meant their only option was to do ICSI IVF. After grieving that they would not be having a baby naturally, they went ahead with this and in their first cycle of IVF, Rachael experienced overstimulation and then sadly miscarriage at around 9 weeks.  Her miscarriage was prolonged, difficult and ended in surgery. She then discovered she had developed hypothryroidisma and ...

Infertility, miscarriage and the grief of being unable to have a second child with Cat

November 08, 2022 09:00 - 1 hour - 47 MB

I am so happy to bring you today’s episode with Cat.  Cat chats with me from a small idyllic village in England about her fertility journey. Cat’s journey has been 10 years and included a diagnosis of unexplained infertility. They had  3 rounds of Intrauterine Insemination (IUI), 4 fresh rounds of In vitro fertilization (IVF) and 2 frozen transfers (FET). She has been pregnant 3 times, miscarrying twice and also losing an identical twin in her final pregnancy - the one that gave them their ...

Infertility and letting go with Kathryn

October 26, 2022 00:00 - 44 minutes - 30.8 MB

Kathryn and her husband spent 8 years trying to coneive a much wanted child, which included IVF and miscarriage.   After 8 years they made the difficult decision to let go and carry on their life in a way that didn't match their dreams. "I had the movie version of my life in my head and I had to learn to let that go." Kathryn describes her experience as incredibly isolating and at the time she struggled to find the support she needed.  As a result of this, she is now a qualified life coach,...

Baby loss in a pandemic with Esther

October 18, 2022 19:00 - 41 minutes - 28.2 MB

Esther was pregnant with her fourth child during New Zealand's first Covid 19 lockdown, and living on a high country station in rural Kaikoura. The lockdown restrictions were stong and strict and her midwife appointments had not been regular, although things were going well. At 18 weeks her midwife could not find a heartbeat and after driving to Christchurch it was confirmed her baby had died. Because of the pandemic and restrictions she was separated from her husband and two of her children...

Baby loss, TFMR and healing through creativity with Suzie

October 11, 2022 18:00 - 1 hour - 50.9 MB

In this episode I am speaking with Suzie and we recorded it especially to release in baby loss awareness week. Suzie is a photographer, a photography mentor and education provider and an author. Suzie shares with us the experiences she went through on the journey to create her family. It is a story of miscarriage, baby loss, TFMR (Termination for medical reasons), and of two beautiful living children. Suzie shares the emotional complications and pain of TFMR - which includes shame, isolation...

Secondary infertility and miscarriage with Arna

October 04, 2022 18:00 - 56 minutes - 38.8 MB

Arna's story - secondary infertility and miscarriage When trying to conceive her second child, Arna experienced miscarriages, severe morning sickness , IVF treatment and anxiety.  She went through a lot. After all of this, Arna now holds her baby Andie in her arms. Arna's instagram - https://www.instagram.com/nz_secondary_infertility_/ Podcast instagram - https://www.instagram.com/waitingforyou.podcast/ Photography instagram - https://www.instagram.com/janinefoxphotography/

Many cycles of IVF, and egg donation with Jules

September 28, 2022 19:00 - 1 hour - 48.6 MB

Jules went through a huge IVF journey, trying to conceive her baby. Four and a half years and 13 cycles of IVF. There were many transfers that did not result in pregnancy, many cycles that got cancelled or did not get to transfer stage, as well as three chemical pregnancies. Jules and her husband were living in a cycle of hope and grief. After much thought and working through the loss of Jules' genetics, they went on to find an egg donor and had amazing success. This is a beautiful and painf...

Molar pregnancy and looking after mental health with Cumorah

September 20, 2022 22:00 - 45 minutes - 31.3 MB

Cumorah shares her experience of having a molar pregnancy when trying to conceive her second child.  A molar pregnancy has to be removed surgically and followed up closely with regular blood tests as it can develop into cancer. Cumorah experienced deep depression which she describes as taking over her life. She shares with us the ways in which she worked hard to get well again. At the time of recording she was pregnant and her baby was due soon.  She now has her beautiful baby in her arms. ...

IVF, miscarriage, egg donation and losing a sister with Felicity

May 31, 2022 20:00 - 1 hour - 65.4 MB

In this episode I chat with Felicity who shares her story of infertiliy, IVF, multiple miscarriages and D&C's, egg donation, embryo testing and very sadly losing her young sister. Felicity was diagnosed with low ovarian reserve and endometriosis and she and her husband did multiple rounds of IVF resulting in no pregancy or miscarriage. They tested embryos from two of their cycles to try to help their decision making and increase their chances. Felicity also discovered she has Graves disease...

IVF, miscarriage and providing emergency foster care with Josh

May 10, 2022 07:00 - 56 minutes - 38.9 MB

In this episode I chat with Josh who shares the very long and complex journey he and his wife Jo went through to have their son Wolfgang (or Wolfie). It is a story of unexplained infertility, many rounds of IVF and countless embryo transfers, miscarriages, nearly losing Jo with one of the miscarriages, providing emergency foster care, and finally having Wolfie in their arms. It is also the story of an adventurous couple who made big decisions and pushed their limits. Connect with Josh Insta...

Secondary infertility and egg donation with Lydia

April 26, 2022 22:00 - 55 minutes - 38.4 MB

In this episode Lydia shares her story of becoming a Mama to her two girls Jemima and Mabel. Their first daughter was conceived easily and she was born in 2014. When they tried for a second child, they had difficultly and were diagnosed with secondary infertility, namely very low AMH levels.  They were told they would need IVF and probably egg donation. The subsequent years involved trying treatment with Lydia's eggs, becoming pregnant naturally but then losing the baby at 13 weeks, gettin...

Infertility, IVF, recurrent miscarriage and twins with Emily

April 19, 2022 09:00 - 52 minutes - 35.7 MB

In today's episode Emily shares her story of becoming a Mama to her twins Charlie and Delilah. Emily and her partner Mark struggled to conceive and went on to have IVF treatment. From their first cycle they got 8  day five embryos but sadly Emily went on to experience recurrent miscarriages after each embryo transfer. They were going through the process of sperm donation when they decided to try with their own embryos one more time.  They transferred two embryos thinking they would be lucky ...

PCOS and postnatal depression with Saira

April 12, 2022 08:00 - 39 minutes - 27.3 MB

In this episode Saira shares her experience of PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome), how it affected her fertility and the treatment she received to help her have her first daughter. In her pregnancy Saira struggled with back and hip pain and also had kidney stones at 32 weeks. Saira suffered postnatal depression after her daughter was born and sought help at 10 months post partum.  She shares with us the denial she went through that she wasn't well, and then all the things she put in place t...

The trauma of baby loss with Meg

April 05, 2022 08:00 - 36 minutes - 25.1 MB

In this episode Meg shares the experience of losing her baby Ada at 20 weeks pregnant. Meg's waters broke one day after work at 20 weeks and although her baby still had a heartbeat when they got to A&E, she was told her baby would not survive. Meg so bravely shares her experience in the hospital, waiting all day on a labour and delivery ward for things to be signed off,  giving birth to Ada and leaving the hospital without her baby in her arms. Huge thanks to Meg for sharing her story. This ...

Losing two daughters shortly after birth with Russell

March 29, 2022 07:00 - 1 hour - 48.6 MB

In this episode Russell shares his story of the journey to have children knowing that a complex chomosomal issue was always going to be part of the picture.  In Season 2, Russell's wife Kelly shared their story and here we are privileged to hear Russell's perspective and experience. Russell and Kelly have two healthy living children and had to say heartbreaking goodbye  s to their other two daughters as they passed away shortly after they were born. This episode is dedicated to Nina and Mol...

Sperm donation and miscarriage with Cass

March 22, 2022 09:00 - 47 minutes - 32.9 MB

In this episode Cass shares her story  of trying to become a Mama on her own, using a private sperm donor.  Cass' story involves finding a sperm donor, trying to conceive, miscarriage and grief.  She also experienced pain and unexpected symptoms following her miscarriage which culminated in surgery. It has been hard, complex and painful and Cass continues to try for her baby who she longs to have in her arms.  Thank you for opening your heart and sharing your story Cass x   Connect with Ca...

Hyperthyroidism and unexplained infertility with Robin

March 15, 2022 18:00 - 48 minutes - 33.2 MB

Robin was diagnosed with a thyroid issue which needed treatment and balancing Also diagnosed with unexplained infertility No fertility treatment until the thyroid issue was sorted out which took 18 months First IVF cycle in USA,  with no positive result Moved to NZ and second cycle was here in NZ, which was successful and they had their daughter Moana Later they went on to try a frozen embryo transfer and were blessed with their second daughter Ruby They then found themselves in a pos...

Unicornuate uterus and IVF with Nina

March 08, 2022 08:00 - 35 minutes - 24.1 MB

 - Nina lost of left ovary and falliopian tube due to ovarian cyst  - She later discovered she has a unicornuate uterus  - IVF treatment was the only option to try for a baby  - First cycle produced 2 eggs and neither of them fertilised  - Second cycle produced 15 eggs and 4 embryos,  and resulted in a freeze all cycle due to        OHSS  - 1st frozen transfer cancelled  - 2nd frozen transfer resulted in a chemical pregnancy  - 3rd frozen transfer gave Nina and her partner their gorgeous boy...

Endometriosis, infertility, IVF and holistic treatments with Hayley

December 21, 2021 19:00 - 1 hour - 46.8 MB

Hayley and her husband found themselves at Fertility associates after trying to conceive for a couple of years.  Hayley was very unexpectedly diagnosed with Stage 4 endometriosis. They held off on surgery for the endometriosis and also IVF treatment.  Hayley felt very reluctant about IVF.     After researching, Hayley worked with a nutritionist on her diet (Mikki Williden) Three months later she became pregnant but then had a miscarriage. As time went on she felt like no one was supporti...

Infertility, embryo donation, birth trauma and developmental issues with Anna

December 14, 2021 07:00 - 1 hour - 47 MB

Two and a half years after getting married Anna’s husband Kyle was diagnosed with Sperm Maturation Arrest, which is irreversible and is considered to be absolute infertility. Their only option to become pregnant was sperm donation.  They were both on different pages about this and it caused too much tension so they decided not to do sperm donation and not to have children. Anna made the decision to leave the job she loved working with children because it was too painful.  She did a faceboo...

Fertility treatment, miscarriage and permanent foster care with Kiri

November 30, 2021 19:00 - 59 minutes - 41 MB

After experiencing a miscarriage at 21 Kiri thought getting pregnant was not going to be an issue for her but after she was married, they struggled to become pregnant.  With no diagnosis and no funding for treatment, they had a long wait ahead of them to access treatment.  While waiting Kiri became pregnant and they thought this was the one, but at 11 weeks Kiri had a miscarriage which was devastating for them. They finally went on to have fertility treatment starting with IUI and then mov...

Experiencing baby loss with Andy

November 23, 2021 08:00 - 27 minutes - 19.2 MB

Andy has PCOS and endometriosis and volunteers for Qendo  - a charity based in Queensland, Australia supporting people with endometriosis, adenomyosis, PCOS and infertility. Andy and her partner did not use contraception foduring  their four year relationship as Andy felt she would have difficulty becoming pregnant.   The day Andy went in for her endometriosis/PCOS surgery she discovered she was pregnant, as she was sitting in pre-op all prepped and ready to go. So her surgery was cancell...

Single mama by choice, sperm donation and IVF with Jessica

November 16, 2021 07:00 - 1 hour - 68.1 MB

Jessica is a single mum by choice, choosing to have a baby using a sperm donor and not waiting for the right partner to come along. She had been diagnosed with endometriosis at the age of 21 and once she had further tests done at the fertility clinic it was also confirmed that her right tube was damaged from a surgery she had as a baby, and her left blocked from the endometriosis. This meant she would need IVF treatment .  Jessica found a sperm donor through an online forum  and began her ...

Creating a donor egg baby with Emma

November 09, 2021 09:00 - 56 minutes - 38.9 MB

Emma and her partner Rowan spent a few years trying for a baby naturally before seeing a Fertility specialist. They tried Clomiphene treatment on and off for about a year with no success and then began IVF. Their first two cycles of IVF both produced one embryo and sadly no pregnancy for them. It was then suggested they find a donor and a friend of theirs had already offered, so they then started the egg donor process with testing and counselling. Their first IVF cycle using their donor’...

Welcoming a baby and saying goodbye to a loved one with Ruth

November 02, 2021 19:00 - 40 minutes - 27.6 MB

 Ruth’s mother in law Christine had a large family of 7 children.  She was all about family and bringing people together, and had a huge capacity for people, helping and love.  Ruth had a wonderful relationship with her. Around the time that Ruth was 37 weeks pregnant with her second child, Christine’s body started changing and not working in the same way. Christine was quickly diagnosed with motor neuron disease and Ruth’s son Corban was born shortly after.  The newborn phase with her son...

Double donation baby and single mum by choice with Olivia

October 26, 2021 07:00 - 1 hour - 47.3 MB

Olivia always knew she might have fertility issues due to the history in her family. After breaking her spine and having ongoing back pain it was discovered she had endometriosis and adenomyosis, as well as low egg reserves. Feeling she didn’t have time to wait, she decided to go ahead with trying to have a baby alone, using fertility treatment. After 13 months on the sperm donor waiting list she chose her donor and got started with IUI treatments which were not successful.  She then went...

Infertility, fertility treatment, miscarriage and a twin pregnancy with Becca

October 19, 2021 09:00 - 44 minutes - 30.2 MB

Rebecca became pregnant easily with her first child but struggled to get pregnant a second time and underwent fertility treatment through a clinic. After two cycles of IUI treatment she was still not pregnant and felt that she was letting people down not being able to become pregnant, even with this fertility treatment help. On their third cycle of IUI Becca became pregnant but then miscarried.  She describes this time as the loneliest she has ever felt.  After a failed fourth IUI Becca c...

Losing two babies shortly after birth with Kelly

October 12, 2021 09:00 - 1 hour - 42.5 MB

Kelly is a mum of four.  She has two living children – Brooklyn and Jake, and two children who she had to say goodbye to within hours of them being born – Nina and Molly. Kelly learned in her early life that she was a carrier of a Chromosomal issue running in the family, passed down from her dad.  She is a carrier but when she has children they could either be totally fine, a carrier like her, or incompatible with life, ending in miscarriage, stillbirth or death shortly after birth.  A 50 %...

Unexplained infertility, fertility treatment and Hyperemesis Gravidarum (HG) in pregnancy with Liz

October 04, 2021 00:00 - 49 minutes - 34 MB

After trying for a year Liz and her husband found themselves at a fertility clinic with a diagnosis of 'unexplained infertility’'.  They started with Clomiphene treatment and were still unsuccessful after three cycles.  They then went onto IUI treatment and four cycles later they were still not pregnant.  So they were advised to move onto IVF treatment and on the first cycle became pregnant with their daughter Josie. Liz shares with us her emotional and mental health during this time and h...

Thankyou and end of season one

September 03, 2021 00:00 - 5 minutes - 3.79 MB

Today I share just a short solo episode to round off season one of Waiting for you. I am so proud of what I have created and so grateful to those who have shared their stories and those who have listened along. I am currently chatting to and lining up interviews for Season 2, so I will see you then! Janine's instagram https://www.instagram.com/janinefoxphotography/ Janine's website  https://www.janinefoxphotography.co.nz/ Podcast submissions https://www.janinefoxphotography.co.nz/podcast

Fertililty treatment and egg donation with Lauren

August 24, 2021 21:00 - 1 hour - 48.6 MB

Lauren knew she might face fertility issues due to her family history and so after 6 months of trying she went to her GP,  but was told not to worry. She went on to self-refer to Fertility Associates and after testing of both her and her husband, they started with two self-funded rounds of Clomiphene treatment which were sadly both unsuccessful. The fertility specialist then suggested laparoscopy  and hysterocscopy to check the uterus, fallopian tubes as well checking for endometriosis.  Qu...

Volunteering in the baby loss space for Heartfelt with Emma

August 17, 2021 00:00 - 52 minutes - 35.9 MB

Heartfelt is a volunteer organisation of professional photographers dedicated to giving the gift of photographic memories to families who have experienced stillbirth or have children with serious or life threatening illness. Heartfelt is dedicated to providing this gift in a caring and compassionate manner, with all services free of charge. Emma has many roles within Heartfelt.  First and foremost she is a photographer for them and has helped around 450 families in her seven years so far. ...

PCOS, Clomiphene and living in limbo with Ruth

August 10, 2021 03:00 - 1 hour - 55.7 MB

Ruth experienced irregular periods and despite not having any of the other common PCOS symptoms,  was diagnosed with PCOS.   She was referred to Fertility Associates to help her start her family. Ruth shares with us feelings of isolation as she watched her friends having babies and knew that her husband did not feel it all as deeply as she did. Through the clinic she and her husband Dave started on Clomiphene treatment, but after three cycles and no success, they took a break. Two months l...

Solo mum by choice using a donor with Lauryn

August 04, 2021 10:00 - 44 minutes - 30.9 MB

 I apologise for the sound quality of this episode.  This was my first in-person interview and I clearly didn't get it right, but this story needs to be heard and perfectionism needs to be sent packing so here it is! Lauryn’s longing to be a mum was deep but not available to her in the ‘conventional’ way so she chose to be a solo mum, using a private sperm donor to help her conceive her son.   Her mum suggested donor conception.  At first Lauryn dismissed the idea as too unconventional but ...

Relationship loss while pregnant with Anna

July 28, 2021 10:00 - 37 minutes - 25.5 MB

Anna was in a committed and secure relationship of four years when she discovered she was pregnant.  The pregnancy was unplanned and although she was a little nervous,  she was happy for this surprise.  However this day became the day her world fell apart as her partner’s reaction was very unexpected. Her partner very quickly gave her an ultimatum.  Either marry him  and live with his parents or have an abortion.  Anna was not prepared to be given that kind of ultimatum and abortion was nev...

IVF, trauma, and maternal poor health and hearing loss with Jen

July 21, 2021 03:00 - 1 hour - 41.9 MB

In this episode Jen takes us through her story of endometriosis, IVF, trauma and poor health.  Jen suffered debilitating period pain and often ended op in the emergency department and led to a laparoscopy. After trying for a year, she needed IVF quickly as her egg reserves had dropped significantly.  Her first embryo transfer didn’t work and she experienced a very traumatic end to that cycle with a lot of bleeding and pain, and a hospital stay.  Following this her mental health declined and...

PCOS, IVF and Autism with Charlotte

July 13, 2021 19:00 - 47 minutes - 32.4 MB

In this episode Charlotte shares her story of a diagnosis of Polycystic ovarian syndrome , the impact that had on her fertility, and her subsequent fertility treatment. Living outside of a main centre, they had to access treatment from a distance which proved difficult at times.  They started treatment using Clomiphene and Letrizole and then moved onto IVF. Their first cycle of IVF gave them their beautiful son Hugo.  They subsequently experienced two miscarriages before having their secon...

A whole lot of hope with Lisa

July 04, 2021 08:00 - 1 hour - 42.5 MB

In this episode I talk with Lisa who is 8 years into her journey to create her family. Lisa was originally diagnosed with PCOS at 18, which has evolved into hypothalamic-pituatary-ovarian (HPO) axis disorder. After getting married Lis and her husband headed straight to a fertility clinic and started on Letrozole treatment.  This was followed by two cycles of IUI and then they moved onto IVF. With no eggs collected from her first two cycles of IVF, they moved to a different protocol (IVM) whi...

Navigating endometriosis, IVF and OHSS with Emm

June 29, 2021 20:00 - 50 minutes - 35 MB

In this episode I talk with Emm who navigated endometriosis, IVF and Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome on her journey to have her son Dillon. Emm's endometriosis took 8 years of battling to get a diagnosis and gave her such severe pain that she was in the emergency department many times over.  Despite having surgery, she still faced an IVF journey . During her egg collection they retrieved a large number of eggs  but she subsequently developed Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome which caused h...

Episode 1 - Janine's story

June 22, 2021 03:00 - 34 minutes - 23.5 MB

In this solo episode, I share my story of infertility, coming to have our son and the work I do today.   After a year of trying for a baby we were referred to a fertility specialist.  I was diagnosed with endometriosis and had surgery for this.  It then transpired that my husband also had fertility issues so our chances of conceiving naturally were very low. We started with IUI treatment and then moved onto IVF treatment.  On our third IVF cycle we were gifted our beautiful baby boy.   The e...