Next Episode: 1x03 The Witch

Buffy the Vampire slayer . . . . Holy cow . . . why do you people do this to me? Hi, It's Money, and I'm really starting to miss Alias right about now. This first episode is quite shaky. Like mayonnaise flavored jello. Really really white, not appetizing at all, and a foundation made of questionable choices. I'm feeling the pain that Bitches had- being the unspoiled one can really suck sometimes, especially when what you just watched was as unsatisfying as mayonnaise and ricotta spread on crumpets and saltines, and a bottle of room-temperature Aquafina to wash it down. While high on meth. (Trust me, that metaphor will make sense if you listen). Buffy is in the title, though, so I don't need to give her a derisive nickname. I am excited to find out what all the hubbub was about, but Bitches tells me the first season sucked. And you patrons are the ones that said we should go through this episode by episode, so . . . I hate you all. This episode is VERY low budget, and I was a bit disappointed to see one of my favorite actors (Eric Balfour) exit the show so quickly. And lets be honest, this was a hot mess. Poorly lit, poorly choreographed, poorly shot. And the plot seems to try to ramp up but sort of peters out without much of a climax. But I can see the beginnings of Joss Wheadon start to emerge, which I'm enjoying. I hope to see more of his personality start to come through. I loved Dollhouse and Cabin in the Woods is a masterpiece of meta-fiction. But what you guys wanted was a hate-cast of the first season, and that's what you're getting. So buckle in, guys. And get the wine ready. I'm going to need it. And a big straw.