17. A Buzzsaw Made Of Bananas

Support Topic Lords on Patreon and get episodes a week early! (https://www.patreon.com/topiclords)
Lords:
* April is Jim's wife again and still a Beast Lord.
* https://twitter.com/aprilsaur
* https://www1.flightrising.com/lair/463464
* John is a Mystery.
Topics:
* 2:25 Create a D&D character right now
* Drizzt the Drow. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DrizztDo%27Urden
* Moai eyes. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moai#Eyes
* 12:51 Being friends with people who are more than ten years older/younger than you: not weird until suddenly it is?
* Teaching English in Japan. https://www.internationalteflacademy.com/teach-english-in-japan
* Nova. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nova(eikaiwa)
* 24:31 Being in another country and seeing a person from your own country: is a head nod appropriate or not?
* 30:05 You can get Big Mike bananas from a specialty dealer in Miami
* https://miamifruit.org/
* https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rambutan
* 43:04 Relational memory/mind palaces/file structures from long-retired computers
* 46:37 What's your preferred method for migrating your stuff from your old computer to your new computer?
* 56:43 Willow asks: "Methods for assembling great salads"
Microtopics:
* Refusing to be a Topic Lord because you're just on Topic Lords to promote your alternative podcast Beast Lords.
* Not having anyone to plug this time either but maybe you have a Soundcloud somewhere.
* Choosing all of your topics while driving to the zoo.
* Containing multitudes and being super excited.
* A band of adventurers being led by an operatic soprano.
* A party of all bards.
* Appropriating spam musubi because it's delicious.
* Not technically being part of a band of adventurers but you play a tambourine and own the van.
* Stealing the spam musubi from your bass player's bag of holding because they're going to go bad eventually.
* Keeping both gold coins and spam musubi in the same bag of holding and having to dig around for the money when you buy anything.
* Finally having a dog on this podcast.
* Putting your dead dog in every D&D party you're in for the rest of your life.
* Putting your dead dog in every platformer you make for the rest of your life.
* All your D&D adventures going wrong because you're just musicians and can't actually deal with monsters.
* Putting monsters onto the bus to the next town over.
* Putting a fishtank bubbler on your bag of holding so all the monsters in there can breathe.
* Fixing it then ruining it.
* Coming to your chosen profession late in your life.
* Age gaps getting less weird as time goes on.
* Thinking about watching new TV to be able to relate to young people and deciding nobody has that kind of time.
* Old people being full of stories from their lives.
* Not talking to your friend as much as you used to because she lives in Ohio now.
* Spending your retirement taking care of dogs.
* Responding to difficult situations with grace and tact.
* Stopping going to work because they stopped paying you.
* The English teacher bubble in Japan.
* Seeing the only other white person for a mile in any direction and wondering if you should nod at them.
* Seeing the only other white person for a mile in any direction and thinking "frickin Americans!"
* Not wanting to talk to strangers except in your favorite coffee shop.
* Telling your wife something a week ago and then finding out it's a myth and having to correct her on a podcast.
* Bananas being especially susceptible to disease.
* Replacing the Cavendish banana with an even shittier banana after it succumbs.
* Hiding your bananas because if your son sees them he won't be able to think about anything else.
* Giving your son bananas because he already poops enough.
* Foot-long avocados.
* A giant box of intimidating tropical fruit being the best Christmas gift.
* Drinking soursop juice tasting flights at a Mexican restaurant.
* Bananas that look like a buzzsaw made of bananas.
* Your infant son seeing a rambutan and realizing that maybe some things don't go in your mouth.
* Haunted fruit.
* Remembering trauma that happened when you were way too young to remember stuff.
* Visiting your dad in prison and he's wearing fake shoes.
* Riding in the back of a pickup truck and sharing Now & Laters with your older sister.
* The US government deciding that televising court trials is a terrible idea after televising the OJ Simpson trial.
* Knowing when a thing happened because you remember where it happened.
* Trying to construct a mind palace like Hannibal and Sherlock and after a day of hard work deciding you don't need to remember anything that badly.
* Yelling "story math!" when you correctly predict a story beat.
* Realizing at the end of the episode that he's been inside his mind palace the entire time.
* Copying your old hard drive onto the new one always working until one day you get an SSD drive and nothing fits.
* Paying Dropbox money to get more storage and Dropbox starting to spam you about features you don't care about.
* Only having a laptop to more effectively play your favorite web game.
* Most people not really having any use for a desktop PC any more.
* Having to remember life milestones differently because your life has settled down.
* Liking a salad that doesn't have any lettuce in it.
* Never having so badly wanted to go make a salad.
* Peeling cucumbers so you don't get Cucumber Gas.
* A hot cucumber.
* Flashing your King.com CEO badge to get into the food truck even.
* The burger joint offering you a salad with cheddar cheese crumbles on it and it turns out to just be a slice of cheddar they broke into a few pieces.
* Crisping cheddar cheese in the broiler and throwing away the rest of your meal because you've peaked.
* Trying to convince your wife that if you add mayo to a cheese plate it becomes a salad.
* Not understanding when the young folks talk about going to sleep.

Support Topic Lords on Patreon and get episodes a week early!

Lords:

April is Jim's wife again and still a Beast Lord.

https://twitter.com/aprilsaur
https://www1.flightrising.com/lair/463464

John is a Mystery.

Topics:

2:25 Create a D&D character right now

Drizzt the Drow. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Drizzt_Do%27Urden
Moai eyes. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Moai#Eyes

12:51 Being friends with people who are more than ten years older/younger than you: not weird until suddenly it is?

Teaching English in Japan. https://www.internationalteflacademy.com/teach-english-in-japan
Nova. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nova_(eikaiwa)

24:31 Being in another country and seeing a person from your own country: is a head nod appropriate or not?
30:05 You can get Big Mike bananas from a specialty dealer in Miami

https://miamifruit.org/
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rambutan

43:04 Relational memory/mind palaces/file structures from long-retired computers
46:37 What's your preferred method for migrating your stuff from your old computer to your new computer?
56:43 Willow asks: "Methods for assembling great salads"

Microtopics:

Refusing to be a Topic Lord because you're just on Topic Lords to promote your alternative podcast Beast Lords.
Not having anyone to plug this time either but maybe you have a Soundcloud somewhere.
Choosing all of your topics while driving to the zoo.
Containing multitudes and being super excited.
A band of adventurers being led by an operatic soprano.
A party of all bards.
Appropriating spam musubi because it's delicious.
Not technically being part of a band of adventurers but you play a tambourine and own the van.
Stealing the spam musubi from your bass player's bag of holding because they're going to go bad eventually.
Keeping both gold coins and spam musubi in the same bag of holding and having to dig around for the money when you buy anything.
Finally having a dog on this podcast.
Putting your dead dog in every D&D party you're in for the rest of your life.
Putting your dead dog in every platformer you make for the rest of your life.
All your D&D adventures going wrong because you're just musicians and can't actually deal with monsters.
Putting monsters onto the bus to the next town over.
Putting a fishtank bubbler on your bag of holding so all the monsters in there can breathe.
Fixing it then ruining it.
Coming to your chosen profession late in your life.
Age gaps getting less weird as time goes on.
Thinking about watching new TV to be able to relate to young people and deciding nobody has that kind of time.
Old people being full of stories from their lives.
Not talking to your friend as much as you used to because she lives in Ohio now.
Spending your retirement taking care of dogs.
Responding to difficult situations with grace and tact.
Stopping going to work because they stopped paying you.
The English teacher bubble in Japan.
Seeing the only other white person for a mile in any direction and wondering if you should nod at them.
Seeing the only other white person for a mile in any direction and thinking "frickin Americans!"
Not wanting to talk to strangers except in your favorite coffee shop.
Telling your wife something a week ago and then finding out it's a myth and having to correct her on a podcast.
Bananas being especially susceptible to disease.
Replacing the Cavendish banana with an even shittier banana after it succumbs.
Hiding your bananas because if your son sees them he won't be able to think about anything else.
Giving your son bananas because he already poops enough.
Foot-long avocados.
A giant box of intimidating tropical fruit being the best Christmas gift.
Drinking soursop juice tasting flights at a Mexican restaurant.
Bananas that look like a buzzsaw made of bananas.
Your infant son seeing a rambutan and realizing that maybe some things don't go in your mouth.
Haunted fruit.
Remembering trauma that happened when you were way too young to remember stuff.
Visiting your dad in prison and he's wearing fake shoes.
Riding in the back of a pickup truck and sharing Now & Laters with your older sister.
The US government deciding that televising court trials is a terrible idea after televising the OJ Simpson trial.
Knowing when a thing happened because you remember where it happened.
Trying to construct a mind palace like Hannibal and Sherlock and after a day of hard work deciding you don't need to remember anything that badly.
Yelling "story math!" when you correctly predict a story beat.
Realizing at the end of the episode that he's been inside his mind palace the entire time.
Copying your old hard drive onto the new one always working until one day you get an SSD drive and nothing fits.
Paying Dropbox money to get more storage and Dropbox starting to spam you about features you don't care about.
Only having a laptop to more effectively play your favorite web game.
Most people not really having any use for a desktop PC any more.
Having to remember life milestones differently because your life has settled down.
Liking a salad that doesn't have any lettuce in it.
Never having so badly wanted to go make a salad.
Peeling cucumbers so you don't get Cucumber Gas.
A hot cucumber.
Flashing your King.com CEO badge to get into the food truck even.
The burger joint offering you a salad with cheddar cheese crumbles on it and it turns out to just be a slice of cheddar they broke into a few pieces.
Crisping cheddar cheese in the broiler and throwing away the rest of your meal because you've peaked.
Trying to convince your wife that if you add mayo to a cheese plate it becomes a salad.
Not understanding when the young folks talk about going to sleep.

Support Topic Lords