I am erotic aliveness!

Personally, I am turned on by touch, verbal appreciations, quality time, playfulness, creating with someone, playing with power dynamics, and giving and receiving gifts. Also, I embody erotic intelligence.

What do I know about my fantasy life?  Do I have one? Do I trust it, judge it, or feel shame about it? Do I get to express sexual fantasies in partnership?

Do I watch porn?  If so, how do I feel about watching it?  What turns me on and what doesn’t?

What feelings do I seek to experience through sex?  (i.e love, belonging, power, control, play, intimacy, etc.)

What turns me on the most? What shuts down my sexual appetite?

KNOW YOUR PLEASURE

What sensations happen in my body when I’m present and turned on?

When does my body feel most relaxed? What helps me feel safe, at ease, and connected?

When do I shut down my self-pleasuring or pleasure with my partner?  What am I telling myself about how I should be or how they should be?

How much pleasure can I open to?

Do I get more turned on by touch, verbal appreciations, quality time, playfulness, creating with someone, playing with power dynamics, or giving and receiving gifts?

KNOW YOUR BOUNDARIES

What are my boundaries — physical and emotional?

Do I feel comfortable and empowered voicing my boundaries? Voicing my “NO”? Voicing my “YES”? Do I say, “Slow down,” or “Not yet,” or “Can we do this differently”?

Do I feel receptive to others’ boundaries? How do I respond when someone else’s boundaries trigger a sense of shame in me? How do I deal with rejection?

Have I set unconscious limits on my capacity to give and receive?"

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