Today’s Lucky Winner
102 episodes - English - Latest episode: 14 days ago - ★★★★★ - 25 ratings“Life may not be fair, but the afterlife tries to be.” That’s the motto of the DMV. (The Department of Mishaps and Violence). When Dawn Menendez finds out that she’s met her untimely demise in a freak curling iron/fire sprinkler accident, she’s met with a posthumous opportunity. She was the 777th soul reaped by the department that day. She now has the opportunity to go back to earth for an entire year, chaperoned by the Reaper who took her soul. The only hitch? Before she’s sent back to earth, she learns that her cosmic scale has been found wanting. Her soul weighs just enough to get sent to a hell dimension. What could she have possibly done? All she did was play MMO’s and go to work. Her first night on earth, her reaper suggests that her accidental demise may have been murder. If she can prove she was murdered, she gets to be reincarnated, and avoid going to hell. Now, Dawn has a year to prove she was murdered and balance the cosmic scales in her favor.Things would be a lot easier if her Reaper would stop getting high and help her.
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Episodes
Mighty Messy Power Bottoms
January 15, 2022 10:00 - 32 minutes - 22.4 MBWe’re back, BAY-BEE! In this episode, shit’s bugnuts in Dallas. Demons are tearing up straight people trying to bone down in their cars, Sunny has a garage full of VHS tapes, Dawn sounds a lot different, but we aren’t going to make a big deal about it. There’s a 30ft tall dildo, Rita’s beggin’ for a peggin’ from a lady night, and Kyle is experiencing some real executive disfunction. Also: Help the whole gang who makes this show exist under the crushing burden of late stage capitalism by be...
Season 2 Prelude
January 01, 2022 10:00 - 4 minutes - 2.97 MBYa’ll want a little SNEAKY SNEAK of what’s happening in Season 2? You got it, BAY-BEE! For this trailer, we welcome Autumn Potts to the cast, as Dawn. Season 2 begins on January 15th! Cast: Dawn - Autumn Potts @littleinkpotts Rita - Brianne Leeson @brianne_leeson (Instagram), @hotsauceghost (twitter/tiktok) Writer, Director Brianne Leeson Producers Brianne Leeson, Violet Lantz Editor, Sound Design James Leeson Original theme music by Sean Turner Cover art by Bryn Keenum @brynandbri...
Season 2 Prelude
January 01, 2022 10:00 - 4 minutes - 2.97 MBYa’ll want a little SNEAKY SNEAK of what’s happening in Season 2? You got it, BAY-BEE! For this trailer, we welcome Autumn Potts to the cast, as Dawn. Season 2 begins on January 15th! Cast: Dawn - Autumn Potts @littleinkpotts Rita - Brianne Leeson @brianne_leeson (Instagram), @hotsauceghost (twitter/tiktok) Writer, Director Brianne Leeson Producers Brianne Leeson, Violet Lantz Editor, Sound Design James Leeson Original theme music by Sean Turner Cover art by Bryn Keenum @brynandbri...
Rita’s Holiday Special: Sponsored by Horse Medicine
December 15, 2021 10:00 - 27 minutes - 17.5 MBThanks to some help from her friends, drugs and gas station wine, Rita gets to meet The Narrator. That’s right, not only is Rita breaking Sunny’s rule about no food in the bathtub when you’re high, she’s also breaking the fourth wall. Join her as she regales the Narrator with the REAL story of the nativity, because she was THERE…allegedly. Cast: Narrator - Sean Turner @seanwkturner Sunny - Violet Lantz @ultraviolet222 Rita - Brianne Leeson @brianne_leeson (Instagram), @hotsauceghost (...
Rita’s Holiday Special: Sponsored by Horse Medicine
December 15, 2021 10:00 - 27 minutes - 17.5 MBThanks to some help from her friends, drugs and gas station wine, Rita gets to meet The Narrator. That’s right, not only is Rita breaking Sunny’s rule about no food in the bathtub when you’re high, she’s also breaking the fourth wall. Join her as she regales the Narrator with the REAL story of the nativity, because she was THERE…allegedly. Cast: Narrator - Sean Turner @seanwkturner Sunny - Violet Lantz @ultraviolet222 Rita - Brianne Leeson @brianne_leeson (Instagram), @hotsauceghost (...
Bonus Episode - Season One Bloopy Reel
December 01, 2021 10:00 - 13 minutes - 8.34 MBHey Li’l Buddies! Here’s a little bonus episode to tide you over until season 2 premieres on January 15th. We record our episodes together over Zoom, which helps with our performances, but leads to A LOT of goofs. Enjoy some of our choicest outtakes from season 1, and get the hit song, “Miss Congenial Poop Disease” stuck in your head. Sound Design by James Leeson Cover art by Bryn Keenum @brynandbristles http://www.todaysluckywinner.buzzsprout.com http://www.instagram.com/lu...
Bonus Episode - Season One Bloopy Reel
December 01, 2021 10:00 - 13 minutes - 8.34 MBHey Li’l Buddies! Here’s a little bonus episode to tide you over until season 2 premieres on January 15th. We record our episodes together over Zoom, which helps with our performances, but leads to A LOT of goofs. Enjoy some of our choicest outtakes from season 1, and get the hit song, “Miss Congenial Poop Disease” stuck in your head. Sound Design by James Leeson Cover art by Bryn Keenum @brynandbristles http://www.todaysluckywinner.buzzsprout.com http://www.instagram.com/lu...
Bonus Episode - Butthole Bears: The Unauthorized Biography
November 15, 2021 10:00 - 23 minutes - 16.1 MBDid you know that when Dawn listens to that audiobook in episodes 17 and 18, Brianne wrote a whole 18 minutes of audio content, full of jokes and quality information about tardigrades, that you barely heard? She thought it would be smart to have Dawn listen to an audiobook, forgetting that she would be the one who had to write that audiobook. Feast your ears on the unauthorized biography that the butthole bears didn’t sign off on us making - mostly on account of them being so small and no...
Bonus Episode - Butthole Bears: The Unauthorized Biography
November 15, 2021 10:00 - 23 minutes - 16.1 MBDid you know that when Dawn listens to that audiobook in episodes 17 and 18, Brianne wrote a whole 18 minutes of audio content, full of jokes and quality information about tardigrades, that you barely heard? She thought it would be smart to have Dawn listen to an audiobook, forgetting that she would be the one who had to write that audiobook. Feast your ears on the unauthorized biography that the butthole bears didn’t sign off on us making - mostly on account of them being so small and no...
A Boat Mechanic with Gout (Who was Born in August)
October 15, 2021 09:00 - 1 hour - 45.4 MBListen, it’s the dang season finale. After the big news last episode, do we really have to catch you up to speed? You get some answers. You also get some questions. Maybe you get a little bit turned on? Who are we to judge? Enjoy this dummy thicc season finale, Li’l Buddies. Cast: Narrator, Crawford, Jack - Sean Turner @seanwkturner Dawn - Emma Fuentes @og_emmakid Nate, Kyle, Death - Kyle Coughlin @kale_simplykale Viv, Sunny, Rider, Carmilla - Violet Lantz @ultraviolet222 Rita, Sor...
Today’s Lucky Kyle
October 01, 2021 10:00 - 28 minutes - 19 MBThere comes a time, for every eternal being, when they have to throw the rules out the window. Whether it’s after a bad breakup, losing your job, or missing out on those Manolo pumps your had your eye on: Sometimes a girl, or a Kyle, has to cut loose. The DMV may be the department that never sleeps, but thanks to cold brew (and not needing to sleep), neither does Kyle. For a guy who who handles all of Today’s Lucky Winners, I couldn’t help but wonder, when would he get to be Today’s Luc...
Today’s Lucky Kyle
October 01, 2021 10:00 - 28 minutes - 19 MBThere comes a time, for every eternal being, when they have to throw the rules out the window. Whether it’s after a bad breakup, losing your job, or missing out on those Manolo pumps your had your eye on: Sometimes a girl, or a Kyle, has to cut loose. The DMV may be the department that never sleeps, but thanks to cold brew (and not needing to sleep), neither does Kyle. For a guy who who handles all of Today’s Lucky Winners, I couldn’t help but wonder, when would he get to be Today’s Luc...
A Crusty White Dragon That Hoards Cocaine
September 15, 2021 09:00 - 35 minutes - 22.6 MBThat last episode certainly left us with a tense cliffhanger, huh? I’m sure that all turns out okay. Dawn and Rita have a heart to heart while Rita is 8 blunts deep. They attempt to open a cabinet together. (That’s more exciting than it sounds) We find out that Rita has been hiding something. Rita shows an interest in whether or not aliens are real, but we’re sure it’s just because she wants to have sex with them. The ladies go to a place where Dawn is the cool one, and nobody is charmed by ...
Colonel Abernathy Swathmore
September 01, 2021 09:00 - 31 minutes - 19.8 MBIn this episode- Oh, wonderful. More poop and barf jokes. And Rita does some atypical sex stuff. Why did I even show up to describe the episode to you today? It’s always the same bull- I-I’m sorry. I stayed up late after crushing a case of energy drinks, and I’m turbo grouchy. I’m sorry I snapped. I hate when we fight. I love this job, they don’t drug test. Coincidentally, that’s exactly the same thing that happens to Dawn in this episode. Dawn stays up late researching Rita’s family tree....
Colonel Abernathy Swathmore
September 01, 2021 09:00 - 31 minutes - 19.8 MBIn this episode- Oh, wonderful. More poop and barf jokes. And Rita does some atypical sex stuff. Why did I even show up to describe the episode to you today? It’s always the same bull- I-I’m sorry. I stayed up late after crushing a case of energy drinks, and I’m turbo grouchy. I’m sorry I snapped. I hate when we fight. I love this job, they don’t drug test. Coincidentally, that’s exactly the same thing that happens to Dawn in this episode. Dawn stays up late researching Rita’s family tree....
Doing Some “Arts and Crafts”
August 15, 2021 09:00 - 33 minutes - 22.1 MBIn this episode: We take a detour to Dawn’s college days, where she learns about that thing where it’s daytime, but like, you can still see the moon? How is that legal? Crawford eagerly tries to keep drunk drivers off the road. That tattooed vampire lady from last episode talks about the infeasibility of trickle-down economics. Rita and Sunny go on a date. We don’t have a joke here, it’s just cute as hell. Dawn and Dax smoke a bunch of weed and talk about air fryers. Cast: Narrator, Crawfo...
Dopplebanger
August 01, 2021 09:00 - 35 minutes - 22.3 MBIn this episode, there’s a small glitch in Rita’s dreamscape matrix. We learn how to supplement our IRA with silver. We meet a character who’s kind of a big deal. No joke. You’re gonna cream your jeans about it. We spend some time listening to public radio, and we’ve added the Armadillo Art Festival to our calendars. Rita enjoys some trail mix. Cooter is at your service. Cast: Narrator, Willie, Sub, - Sean Turner @seanwkturner Dawn, Hacker Vamp - Emma Fuentes @og_emmakid Driver, Otto,...
Bussymelon
July 15, 2021 09:00 - 30 minutes - 18.3 MBIn this episode, Rita receives a diagnosis that explains A LOT. There’s a strange man at Sanguis, and he’s smoking a long cigarette in the lobby. Crawford engages in hand to hand combat with a warlock. We meet a bubbly guy named Collin, on his first day at his new job. Something spooks the hell out of Carmilla. Wait, seriously? What could be so scary as to spook her? She ripped a guy’s HEART out a couple of episodes ago! Jesus, whatever it is, it’s gotta be unsettling. Dawn decides to do a ...
Bussymelon
July 15, 2021 09:00 - 30 minutes - 18.3 MBIn this episode, Rita receives a diagnosis that explains A LOT. There’s a strange man at Sanguis, and he’s smoking a long cigarette in the lobby. Crawford engages in hand to hand combat with a warlock. We meet a bubbly guy named Collin, on his first day at his new job. Something spooks the hell out of Carmilla. Wait, seriously? What could be so scary as to spook her? She ripped a guy’s HEART out a couple of episodes ago! Jesus, whatever it is, it’s gotta be unsettling. Dawn decides to do a ...
Smooth Jazz? Really?
July 01, 2021 10:00 - 31 minutes - 20 MBIn this episode: Sunny gets not fast enough, and terribly furious, while driving the ice cream truck. Rita does the impossible! Well, the fact that she does it means it’s not impossible, but she does the highly improbable. There’s smooth jazz! We learn that the litmus test for whether or not someone is irredeemably evil lies in asking them their thoughts about the 1999 film, The Mummy. Kyle asks to speak to the manager…OF HELL. Dawn does drugs. Hold on, did we read that right? Yeah! Dawn’s ...
Smooth Jazz? Really?
July 01, 2021 10:00 - 31 minutes - 20 MBIn this episode: Sunny gets not fast enough, and terribly furious, while driving the ice cream truck. Rita does the impossible! Well, the fact that she does it means it’s not impossible, but she does the highly improbable. There’s smooth jazz! We learn that the litmus test for whether or not someone is irredeemably evil lies in asking them their thoughts about the 1999 film, The Mummy. Kyle asks to speak to the manager…OF HELL. Dawn does drugs. Hold on, did we read that right? Yeah! Dawn’s ...
The Ole’ Lickety Split
June 15, 2021 09:00 - 30 minutes - 20.9 MBWell jeez, last we saw Sunny, she found herself in quite the tempting predicament, huh? Perhaps this episode provides a resolution to the cliffhanger we left you on last time, or maybe it doesn’t, because life isn’t fair. (Just kidding! It does. We love you. We wouldn’t leave you hanging.) See what the stars have in store for you this week. It can’t be as bad as getting your face peeled off. Carmilla befriends a youth pastor. Crawford cries about his momma not taking him for walkies, Daw...
The Ole’ Lickety Split
June 15, 2021 09:00 - 30 minutes - 20.9 MBWell jeez, last we saw Sunny, she found herself in quite the tempting predicament, huh? Perhaps this episode provides a resolution to the cliffhanger we left you on last time, or maybe it doesn’t, because life isn’t fair. (Just kidding! It does. We love you. We wouldn’t leave you hanging.) See what the stars have in store for you this week. It can’t be as bad as getting your face peeled off. Carmilla befriends a youth pastor. Crawford cries about his momma not taking him for walkies, Daw...
Love, Sunny
June 01, 2021 09:00 - 33 minutes - 22.7 MBThis episode, Dawn is kicking sensory overload in the taint, and doing some real badass detective stuff at the VoyR Convention. Rita harasses white people who culturally appropriate, and summarily mess up, foods from other cultures. Dawn is forced to do some pest control. Sunny learns about emojis and gains a new admirer. We learn that if an energy vampire ever invites you to a party, maybe you should turn down their invitation. ...
Inga and the Boobenheimers
May 15, 2021 09:00 - 31 minutes - 20.7 MBIn this episode, Sunny conducts a science experiment so sexy, Bill Nye is SHOOK. Rita and Sunny make us wonder if they ever went through an improv group phase in college. Dawn, on the other hand, shows us that she’s not great at “Yes, and,” but she MIGHT speak Finnish. Rita reminisces with a guy named Russell, who has definitely met her before. Crawford raises his voice to his mom, who is not acting like her usual #girlboss self. Dawn gets overwhelmed, and finds comfort in butthole bears....
Inga and the Boobenheimers
May 15, 2021 09:00 - 31 minutes - 20.7 MBIn this episode, Sunny conducts a science experiment so sexy, Bill Nye is SHOOK. Rita and Sunny make us wonder if they ever went through an improv group phase in college. Dawn, on the other hand, shows us that she’s not great at “Yes, and,” but she MIGHT speak Finnish. Rita reminisces with a guy named Russell, who has definitely met her before. Crawford raises his voice to his mom, who is not acting like her usual #girlboss self. Dawn gets overwhelmed, and finds comfort in butthole bears....
Donkey Lady Bridge
May 01, 2021 10:00 - 35 minutes - 24.1 MBThe Donkey Lady Bridge of San Antonio is a pretty messed up urban legend. The gals cut through the misinformation, and get the story straight from the horse’s...well, donkey’s mouth. We meet a trio of ghost hunters. Rita meets a celebrity. Dawn resurrects an old special interest in the name of detective work. P.S. Hey. Hey, you. A...
Donkey Lady Bridge
May 01, 2021 10:00 - 35 minutes - 24.1 MBThe Donkey Lady Bridge of San Antonio is a pretty messed up urban legend. The gals cut through the misinformation, and get the story straight from the horse’s...well, donkey’s mouth. We meet a trio of ghost hunters. Rita meets a celebrity. Dawn resurrects an old special interest in the name of detective work. P.S. Hey. Hey, you. A...
Congenital Poop Disease
April 15, 2021 10:00 - 34 minutes - 23.6 MBIn this episode, Dawn tells Rita a story rife with nudity. We learn about a rare, congenital poop disease. The gals take a road trip, and Rita eats her body weight in pretzels. We hear about the incredible gifts that our local public radio station is offering in their membership drive. Remember, their programming is made possible by listeners like you. The ladies meet a donkey! (Trust us, it’s more important that it sounds.) ...
Congenital Poop Disease
April 15, 2021 10:00 - 34 minutes - 23.6 MBIn this episode, Dawn tells Rita a story rife with nudity. We learn about a rare, congenital poop disease. The gals take a road trip, and Rita eats her body weight in pretzels. We hear about the incredible gifts that our local public radio station is offering in their membership drive. Remember, their programming is made possible by listeners like you. The ladies meet a donkey! (Trust us, it’s more important that it sounds.) ...
Warlock Orgy
April 01, 2021 05:00 - 38 minutes - 26.6 MBIn this episode, Dawn gets an offer she might refuse. She and Rita have a heart-to-heart over a stolen wallet. Rita does drugs. We understand that could be literally any episode, we just want you to know she does drugs in this one. Sunny and Rita do some SMOOCHIN’. We flashback to hell, where Rita teaches a demon about film history. Carmilla has a press conference. There are no drugs or smooching at the press conference, but it may be worth your time. P.S. Hey. Hey, you. Are you new here?...
Grackna the Unending
March 15, 2021 10:00 - 41 minutes - 28.3 MBIn this episode, a sexy misunderstanding leads to a knockoff Boyz II Men, evisceration, and Furbies. Dawn has some questions for an impossibly sexy Warlock. Rita eats a bunch of snacks. We know that happens every episode, but that’s really the highlight of the adventure for her. Carmilla and Crawford discuss early 00’s films and the ramifications of cyber bullying. Oh, and a giant demoness is summoned directly from the pits of hell, coming face to face with our protagonists. Whoops! Almost...
Grackna the Unending
March 15, 2021 10:00 - 41 minutes - 28.3 MBIn this episode, a sexy misunderstanding leads to a knockoff Boyz II Men, evisceration, and Furbies. Dawn has some questions for an impossibly sexy Warlock. Rita eats a bunch of snacks. We know that happens every episode, but that’s really the highlight of the adventure for her. Carmilla and Crawford discuss early 00’s films and the ramifications of cyber bullying. Oh, and a giant demoness is summoned directly from the pits of hell, coming face to face with our protagonists. Whoops! Almost...
Sluts for Socialism
March 01, 2021 11:00 - 31 minutes - 21 MBDiane, It’s 11:30 PM in Rita’s Dreamscape. The gals are entering the town of Twink Peaks. They see an old misogynist get an ass whoopin’, some dude’s butthole, and we take a brief detour to Australia. Rita begins a new business venture. Will she become a #girlboss? Dawn follows up on a dead witch lead, crossing paths with the Warlofia. Hold on, Warlofia? Like the Warlock Mafia? They do NOT call it that. P.S. Hey. Hey, you. Are you new here? Is this your first time listening? What are you ...
Sluts for Socialism
March 01, 2021 11:00 - 31 minutes - 21 MBDiane, It’s 11:30 PM in Rita’s Dreamscape. The gals are entering the town of Twink Peaks. They see an old misogynist get an ass whoopin’, some dude’s butthole, and we take a brief detour to Australia. Rita begins a new business venture. Will she become a #girlboss? Dawn follows up on a dead witch lead, crossing paths with the Warlofia. Hold on, Warlofia? Like the Warlock Mafia? They do NOT call it that. P.S. Hey. Hey, you. Are you new here? Is this your first time listening? What are you ...
Sweet God, Not My Cloaca!
February 15, 2021 11:00 - 37 minutes - 25.6 MBThe Oxford Dictionary defines the cloaca as “ A common cavity at the end of the digestive tract for the release of both excretory and genital products in vertebrates (except most mammals) and certain invertebrates. Specifically, the cloaca is present in birds, reptiles, amphibians, most fish, and monotremes.” Now that we have the important stuff out of the way: The gals are back in the 21st century! What did they change? What does this new timeline look like? Rita is concerned as to ...
Dr. Sunny Simmons, MD, Vamp Pt. 2
February 01, 2021 12:00 - 34 minutes - 23.8 MBThe girls are still back in 1968. Do they “edit” the timeline? That’s our nice way of asking if they say “Let’s screw with it and make another, much hotter timeline! Who gives a flying fart? Like this timeline is very good anyways? Heck that shart!” (We’re still not sure if we can cuss in these descriptions.) What will their new future look like? Is there going to be weird sex stuff at this vampire ceremony? Is Sunny going to be turned? I’m sorry we don’t have answers. This is j...
Dr. Sunny Simmons, MD, Vamp Pt. 1
January 15, 2021 15:00 - 34 minutes - 23 MBDawn goes back to 1955 to make sure her parents bang, or she won’t exist...hold on. Wait, that’s a different time travel story. In our story, the gals go back to 1968, where a very human Sunny has accidentally joined a vampire cult. Can they stop her from getting turned? SHOULD they? We don’t quite remember the movie The Butterfly Effect, but I think the lesson was that it’s all chill, so long as no butterflies are hurt. IDK, it’s time travel. What’s the worst that could happen? P.S. Hey....
Dr. Sunny Simmons, MD, Vamp Pt. 1
January 15, 2021 15:00 - 34 minutes - 23 MBDawn goes back to 1955 to make sure her parents bang, or she won’t exist...hold on. Wait, that’s a different time travel story. In our story, the gals go back to 1968, where a very human Sunny has accidentally joined a vampire cult. Can they stop her from getting turned? SHOULD they? We don’t quite remember the movie The Butterfly Effect, but I think the lesson was that it’s all chill, so long as no butterflies are hurt. IDK, it’s time travel. What’s the worst that could happen? P.S. Hey....
Uncle Nate’s Grilled Cheese Sandwich Special Pt. 2
January 01, 2021 19:00 - 31 minutes - 22 MBRita is forced to actually do her dang job, when Dawn decides to be a badass and take on a building full of vampires. Wasn’t this nerd supposed to be easy to chaperone? We really got the impression she’d stay out of trouble. But now, she does acid in the woods and shoots vampires? It’s like the ending of Grease, without the misogyny and flying car. P.S. Hey. Hey, you. Are you new here? Is this your first time listening? What are you doing at episode 8? This is a serial. Go back to the fir...
Uncle Nate’s Grilled Cheese Sandwich Special Pt.1
December 15, 2020 04:00 - 35 minutes - 24.5 MBThe gals finally have their full moon appointment. Dawn meets an old friend, which is weird, given that her only friends are Rita and Sunny. Flashback to the turn of the century, where the Fruitopia flowed like water. P.S. Hey. Hey, you. Are you new here? Is this your first time listening? What are you doing at episode 7? This is a serial. Go back to the first episode. Go on, GIT! A special thanks to our consultants. One wishes to be anonymous (still invaluable!), and the other is Taryn...
Uncle Nate’s Grilled Cheese Sandwhich Special Pt.1
December 15, 2020 04:00 - 35 minutes - 24.5 MBThe gals finally have their full moon appointment. Dawn meets an old friend, which is weird, given that her only friends are Rita and Sunny. Flashback to the turn of the century, where the Fruitopia flowed like water. P.S. Hey. Hey, you. Are you new here? Is this your first time listening? What are you doing at episode 7? This is a serial. Go back to the first episode. Go on, GIT! A special thanks to our consultants. One wishes to be anonymous (still invaluable!), and the other is Taryn...
Dinosaur Valley Trip
November 30, 2020 14:00 - 31 minutes - 21.4 MBDawn and Rita have some down time before their mysterious full moon rendezvous. Rita verbally threatens someone at a sample kiosk. The gals take a trip, in more ways than one. Rita meets and old friend. Like, a REALLY old friend. The girls share their tips on making the most delectable, garlic butter roasted artichokes you’ve ever had. (Pssst...the secret ingredient is drugs.) P.S. Hey. Hey, you. Are you new here? Is this your first time listening? What are you doing at episode 6? This is ...
Dinosaur Valley Trip
November 30, 2020 14:00 - 31 minutes - 21.4 MBDawn and Rita have some down time before their mysterious full moon rendezvous. Rita verbally threatens someone at a sample kiosk. The gals take a trip, in more ways than one. Rita meets and old friend. Like, a REALLY old friend. The girls share their tips on making the most delectable, garlic butter roasted artichokes you’ve ever had. (Pssst...the secret ingredient is drugs.) P.S. Hey. Hey, you. Are you new here? Is this your first time listening? What are you doing at episode 6? This is ...
Hard Bodied Cubicle Jockeys
November 15, 2020 03:00 - 30 minutes - 21 MBIn this episode, it’s the heist of the century! Not this century, but maybe a century where there wasn’t a lot going on. Definitely one of the centuries without indoor plumbing. Just a pretty chill century where there wasn’t a lot of cool stuff to heist. Also: There’s a heart to heart? Do we do that? Do we have earnest emotional moments on this show now? IDK! Listen to the episode and find out. P.S. Hey. Hey, you. Are you new here? Is this your first time listening? What are you doing at e...
Butthole Bear
November 01, 2020 02:00 - 26 minutes - 18.5 MBThe gals enter the DREAMSCAPE. They meet a new old timey friend...maybe a friend? Still not clear on that. Rita workshops some ideas with an iconic film and dance legend. Dawn shows us the treasure she’s been hiding in her garage. There’s a thrilling rescue mission for a butthole bear. Cast: Narrator, Crawford - Sean Turner @seanwkturner Dawn - Emma Fuentes @og_emmakid Greylance, Gene, Chris - Kyle Coughlin @kale_simplykale Felton, Rider - Violet Lantz @ultraviolet222 Rita, woman - Briann...
Cabroncita
October 17, 2020 03:00 - 28 minutes - 20 MBDawn, Rita, and Sunny save the entire city of Dallas. No joke. They manage to do it without ever leaving Dawn’s apartment. They barely even leave the living room! I swear! How did they do it? Well, I’m not going to tell you in the episode description. Listen to the dang show. Cast: Narrator - Sean Turner @seanwkturner Dawn - Emma Fuentes @og_emmakid Kyle, Senator Owens - Kyle Coughlin @kale_simplykale Carmilla, Sunny - Violet Lantz @ultraviolet222 Rita - Brianne Leeson @brianne_leeson Wr...
Cabroncita
October 17, 2020 03:00 - 28 minutes - 20 MBDawn, Rita, and Sunny save the entire city of Dallas. No joke. They manage to do it without ever leaving Dawn’s apartment. They barely even leave the living room! I swear! How did they do it? Well, I’m not going to tell you in the episode description. Listen to the dang show. Cast: Narrator - Sean Turner @seanwkturner Dawn - Emma Fuentes @og_emmakid Kyle, Senator Owens - Kyle Coughlin @kale_simplykale Carmilla, Sunny - Violet Lantz @ultraviolet222 Rita - Brianne Leeson @brianne_leeson Wr...
2. Morgue Meet Cute
September 30, 2020 03:00 - 30 minutes - 21 MBWe’ve been searching all day to find the Wikihow on what to do if your grim reaper swallows a bunch of pills that are evidence in a murder case. We couldn’t find one. Maybe Dawn can figure it out on her own? I don’t know. How did people handle this before the internet? Also, Dawn and Rita take a field trip to the morgue. And there’s nudity. How did we fit nudity into an audio medium? Listen and find out! Cast: Narrator, Dad - Sean Turner @seanwkturner Dawn - Emma Fuentes @og_emmakid Kyle, S...
Morgue Meet Cute
September 30, 2020 03:00 - 30 minutes - 21 MBWe’ve been searching all day to find the Wikihow on what to do if your grim reaper swallows a bunch of pills that are evidence in a murder case. We couldn’t find one. Maybe Dawn can figure it out on her own? I don’t know. How did people handle this before the internet? Also, Dawn and Rita take a field trip to the morgue. And there’s nudity. How did we fit nudity into an audio medium? Listen and find out! Cast: Narrator, Dad - Sean Turner @seanwkturner Dawn - Emma Fuentes @og_emmakid Kyle, S...