Talking to teenagers about bias

What do you know about bias?

The chances are, if you're a white British parent who doesn't have to use a food bank, you know much less than your teenager. And I'd wager that if you have teens, they will understand much more about bias than you do. In fact, my own teenagers have been instrumental in my own learning curve as I've discovered unconscious bias not just in myself and my family, but all around me in the world.

So what do you need to know about bias as the parent of a teenager?

If this resonates, you will love this episode with Caryn Franklin, MBE, and Professor Keon West about their new audiobook SKEWED, where they shed light on the millions of messages in the media that we absorb every day, without even noticing.

They hope that by listening to the book we'll all be able to notice these biases and know them for what they are. Which, quite aside from being a good thing to do, will help us understand and converse with our teenagers more easily.

But how does understanding bias help make us better parents? In a series of interviews, the book tackles the issues parents are already beginning to challenge, like:

Dads Don’t Cry?  – exploring male vulnerability and bringing up sons who don’t fear tears.Bringing up girls to understand and reject the hormonal payloadAre there harmful messages hidden in children’s entertainment? Why don’t white parents want to talk about race?

This is not a book or a podcast that aims to chastise anyone for the way they think or operate. Instead, it attempts to open our eyes to aims to help open our eyes to how bombarded we are with biases, stereotypes and agendas that we unconsciously absorb every day, and to challenge cultural messaging around identity and objectification, including race, gender, gender non-conformity, sexual orientation, age, and attractiveness. You won't be left with a sense that you're not good enough; instead you'll be equipped to question more, notice more, and be able to rethink the things you've always taken for granted (for example fairy stories that normalise a world where it's okay to kiss an unconscious girl in the woods).

Caryn Franklin MBE, fashion editor and later former presenter of BBC TV’s iconic Clothes Show says "Keon and I wanted to challenge human propensity to absorb bias and the stereotypes our omnipresent and evermore powerful media presents. And just as importantly we wanted to explore our own biases, investigate the origins and unpick the comforting falsehoods we all sometimes tell ourselves”.

Professor Keon West is a Social Psychologist at Goldsmiths, University of London and an expert on identity, prejudice, and representation. Keon opened my eyes to a completely different way of recognising bias in myself and others, and what it can teach me about my own relationships.

Find out more about SKEWED: Decoding media bias on Caryn's website. You will also find the book on Audible via Amazon (affiliate links).

More teenage parenting tips from Helen Wills:

Helen wills is a teen mental health podcaster and blogger at Actually Mummy a resource for midlife parents of teens.

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There are already stories from fabulous guests about difficult things that happened to them as teenagers - including losing a parent, becoming a young carer, and being hospitalised with mental health problems - and how they overcame things to move on with their lives.

You can find more from Helen Wills on parenting teenagers on Instagram and Twitter @iamhelenwills.

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Please note that Helen Wills is not a medical expert, and nothing in the podcast should be taken as medical advice. If you're worried about a teenager, please seek support from a medical professional.

Podcast produced by James Ede at Be Heard production.