Spoiling Ourselves
100 episodes - English - Latest episode: almost 4 years ago - ★★★★★ - 11 ratingsCJ, Lia, Jack and Sam provide the most “definitive” “analysis” of “the greatest television shows” of “all time” – after watching only the first and last episodes of each series.
New episodes every other Monday.
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Episodes
Episode 50: Spoiling Spoiling Ourselves
September 04, 2017 22:17 - 1 hour - 63.2 MBWelcome to Spoiling Ourselves...this week we watched NOTHING! Take a walk down memory lane with us as we reflect on the past 49 episodes, answering questions from friends of the show and ourselves. Which show made us weep the most? Which show do we wish we'd never watched? Which one of us is physically weakest? Which kind of bird is best? Tune in for answers to all these and more, plus some fun compilations of moments from past episodes. **SUPER thanks to Sam Gordon for our compilation mu...
Episode 49: Dollhouse
August 23, 2017 17:04 - 1 hour - 56.9 MBIt's very late, but it's very great - here's ep 49 of Spoiling Ourselves! This week we watched Dollhouse, and talking points include: -acclaimed filmmaker "Josh" Whedon -our new Billy Bush spinoff podcast, Talkin' Bush -life is hardest for boys -animal brains in human bodies vs. human brains in animal bodies Plus, the premiere of new recurring segment, What's Your Shit Style? Call us at 903-SPOIL-US! We'll see you in two weeks for the big 5-0!
Episode 48: The Leftovers
July 24, 2017 22:11 - 53 minutes - 48.7 MBOn a very special episode of Spoiling Ourselves, Jack, Sam, Lia, and CJ talk about HBO's The Leftovers. Just how weird is this show? Why doesn't anyone float away into the sky? Plus, some healthy speculation about the Rapture, cults, and Justin Theroux's big fat c*ck. Was it bigger than Jesus's? We can only guess!
Episode 47: Pretty Little Liars
July 10, 2017 03:37 - 1 hourListen, it’s time to get real. This week we’re doing Pretty Little Liars, and it’s the first show we feel legitimately bad about spoiling for anyone who hasn’t seen it already. In fact, it’s by far the craziest show we’ve EVER watched. Please stop listening to this podcast, watch the first episode, and then watch every episode between that and the last episode. If you’ve ever found a show you LOVE that celebrates statutory rape but didn’t have enough evil twins, forced artificial insemination...
Episode 46: Royal Pains
June 27, 2017 03:13 - 1 hourThis week we watched Royal Pains, a show about a concierge doctor MacGyver-ing rich people in the Hamptons back to health! We're figuring out how this show thinks Russia's government works, discussing exactly where Budapest is and what could possibly go on there, and racking up points, which DO MATTER this time around. We're also debuting our new Who Fuck Who theme song - thanks John Merfeld!!! CALL US at 903-SPOIL-US!!! We'll accept both truths AND dares!
Episode 45: Girls
June 13, 2017 03:32 - 59 minutesWe watched GIRLS, and we're recording while sitting in a DIFFERENT FORMATION this time! What kind of obstacles might an immortal baby face? How much does an abortion cost if you don't go through with it? Most people are sexually aroused by tails, right? CALL US at 903-SPOIL-US and leave a message with your comments, questions, game suggestions, marriage proposals, court summons, or sex tapes. We'll take it all!
Episode 44: Black Sails (feat. Matt Braly)
May 29, 2017 23:14 - 1 hourAhoy, you scurvy dogs! This week we had acquaintance of the show Matt Braly on to discuss Black Sails, the historical pirate drama on Starz. He educates us on the uses of a Dame de Voyage and we tell him to never come back. Plus, we discuss the careers of the many famous actors who appeared on this show and CJ tries to get everyone to summarize the plot without using the words "pirate," "treasure," or "ship." It's hard!
Episode 43: The Vampire Diaries
May 16, 2017 02:54 - 1 hourThis week we watched the very sexy and very confusing Vampire Diaries! We're talking about the difference between a gutter fight and a sewer fight, CJ's secret sexual shame, and BOOOOOONE!
Episode 42: Fawlty Towers (feat. John C. Merfeld)
May 02, 2017 02:53 - 57 minutesAfter a brief hiatus, we're BACK, bay-bee!!! This week we've got acquaintance-of-the-show John C. Merfeld spitting sweet and low into your thirsty eardrums for his Spoiling Ourselves debut. (As we must CONSTANTLY remind you, it takes three appearances to attain friend-of-the-show status. All those who have not appeared on the show are enemies-of-the-show. John's not an enemy, not yet a friend - also not a girl, not yet a woman.) We watched Fawlty Towers. Elon Musk, please get in touch with u...
Episode 41: Friday Night Lights (feat. Danny Garfield)
April 04, 2017 02:14 - 1 hourThis week we welcome guest Danny Garfield to the football rink! We're talking about football time vs. real time, appropriate hair length, the only 4 positions in football, and exactly what kind of wiring is inside those lights. We're also trying our HARDEST to keep this episode under 20 minutes. If your podcast player of choice shows a different length, anything after 20 is just dead air. Check Danny out at https://dgarf.github.io/!
Episode 40: Frasier
March 21, 2017 02:20 - 54 minutesThis week on Spoiling Ourselves: -We watched Frasier! -Is it possible or advisable to breed humans like dogs? -What are our personal views on eugenics? -Sam forgets the name of the main character (Frasier) halfway through the episode -In a controlled environment, could we engineer a human child to grow up exactly like Frasier? -Our pitch to Elon Musk re: funding a real-life Truman Show on the moon -We do not give a shit about Frasier PLUS, Lia’s Australian accent debut!
Episode 39: Chuck (feat. Ben Meyerson)
March 06, 2017 15:51 - 1 hourThis week we're talking about CHUCK, the NBC spy-dramedy mercifully saved from cancellation by the buying power of loyal fans, who took to Subway restaurants in droves to convince the show's sponsor to pay up for another season. If we were on death's door, which restaurant chain should you buy from to save OUR lives? What if this show had been about Chuck Bass instead? Plus, a sexy new game played by guest Ben Meyerson. Tune in for all that and more!
Episode 38: Warehouse 13
February 20, 2017 18:25 - 1 hourThis week on Spoiling Ourselves, we're diving headfirst into the mysterious and magical Warehouse 13! What would our personal, magical artifacts be? What would Chuck Bass' personal, magical artifact be? Why was H.G. Wells' sister also named H.G. Wells? And - your introduction to the lore of BIG SHIRT!
Episode 37: Rizzoli & Isles (feat. Steve Dyer)
February 07, 2017 03:53 - 1 hourThe man, the myth, the LEGEND - this week, we humbly welcome friend of the show STEVE DYER to help us dissect TNT's riveting classic Rizzoli & Isles. Ship off to Boston with us, won't you?!? https://twitter.com/billyeichner/status/812141005486977024?lang=en
Episode 36: Inuyasha
January 22, 2017 22:00 - 1 hourThis week on Spoiling Ourselves, we dive into our first ANIME. INUYASHA follows the adventures of a 15-year-old girl who is transported to feudal Japan after falling down a time-warp well in her backyard, where she befriends a half-demon dog named Inuyasha. Yes, this is what you've been waiting for. How big are our anime sword dicks? What childhood trauma could've caused Lia to be so disgusted by animation in general? Is the show's main villain a severed head in a spiderweb, whose heart-made-...
Episode 35: Ugly Betty (feat. Sam Gordon)
January 09, 2017 22:50 - 1 hourTHIS WEEK on SPOILING OURSELVES, we watched the first and last episodes of Ugly Betty! What are our fantasy body modifications? Is 4 years enough time for a manicure to wear off? Can ANYONE be attractive with just a little bit of creative effort? Tune in to find out!
Episode 34: Kitchen Confidential
December 27, 2016 02:48 - 51 minutesThis week we watched the first and last eps of KITCHEN CONFIDENTIAL, the ill-fated 2005 Bradley Cooper vehicle based on Anthony Bourdain's bestselling memoir, "Kitchen Confidential: Adventures in the Culinary Underbelly." If that description alone doesn't pique your interest, we're not sure what will.
Episode 33: Lie to Me
December 13, 2016 04:53 - 1 hourDid we really watch the first and last episodes of Lie to Me this week - OR ARE WE LYING?!?! There's only one way to find out - go back in time, break into our home, install a secret camera before we record the podcast, leave without being seen, break into our home a second time at a later date to retrieve the camera, go home, spend years studying microexpressions and human psychology, review and interpret the footage, time travel again back to present day, and comment your findings on iTunes.
Episode 32: The Newsroom (feat. Tyler Corey)
November 30, 2016 03:15 - 54 minutesThis week, we're happy to welcome our good friend and lover Tyler back into the fold! Tyler's back in town to settle some disputes for us: since Men of the Sea operates as a four-person Senate, we're often split 50-50 when voting on important issues, so Tyler functions as our Vice President, with the singular purpose of breaking ties. We're also talking a medium amount about The Newsroom.
Episode 31: Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide
November 16, 2016 03:16 - 51 minutesThis week we're talking about Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide - but honestly, that's the least of our concerns, because this week we've also received another letter from Dan Shecklesworth. WHO ARE YOU, DAN? HOW DID YOU GET OUR ADDRESS? Why won't you send us a list of demands, as we've asked you SO many times? We're prepared to do whatever it takes to figure out your true identity. Why is everything you send Maine-themed but postmarked from Florida, or Florida-themed but postmarked fr...
Episode 30: The West Wing (feat. Ben Meyerson)
October 31, 2016 03:03 - 50 minutesCJ's taken a vow of silence this week, but lucky for us we've got special guest Ben Meyerson to help fill in! Listen up to hear our made-up Sorkin monologues, our lyrics to the West Wing theme song, and soon-to-be fan-favorite game West Wing vs. Westworld. Live to tape from our underground grotto, we're 30, flirty and thriving!
Episode 29: Secret Diary of a Call Girl
October 17, 2016 15:02 - 54 minutesOn this week's episode: -What are our darkest sexual fantasies? -What year does CJ plan on dying? -What are our five dogs' names? (SPOILER: they're Paul, Walker, Paul Walker, Javier, and Flintstones!)
Episode 28: Breaking Bad
October 03, 2016 14:39 - 43 minutesWe watched the first and last episodes of Breaking Bad. We do not care for Todd.
Episode 27: The OC (feat. DJ Crab Dip)
September 19, 2016 02:23 - 49 minutesWelcome to Spoiling Ourselves, BITCH! We watched The OC, so we're talking HOT TEENS. Was Bullit the best character? Should Bullit have been the ONLY character? Which of us is more of a Ryan? Tune in, punks.
Episode 26: The Wire
September 06, 2016 03:02 - 1 hourThis week on a very special episode of Spoiling Ourselves, our intrepid heroes celebrate the one-year anniversary of this podcast by talking about The Wire, perennial contender for greatest TV show ever. We learn a lot of nicknames, talk about our favorite TV characters and what they could've brought to the drug wars in Baltimore, plus we get a letter from an old friend. We promise that this episode is only half as dense as your average episode of The Wire
Episode 25: Don't Trust the B---- in Apartment 23 (feat. Andrea Simons)
August 22, 2016 02:15 - 40 minutesThis week, Andrea Simons fills in for Lia after she abandons the safety and comfort of our floating trash barge. Luckily, she had also recently seen the first and last episodes of Don't Trust the B in Apartment 23, so we were able to bring you this episode. Listen in to find out how much we love James Van Der Beek.
Episode 24: The Cape
August 08, 2016 03:22 - 39 minutesThis week our heroes take on The Cape! A 10-episode NBC superhero show that was a true testament to how little quality television CJ has watched in his life. We talk sidekicks, clothing-based superpowers, and about how bad Ryan Wynott was at acting. Ryan, if you're listening, we really don't mean any disrespect, but if you hadn't gotten this show cancelled with your terrible acting it might have turned out halfway decent.
Episode 23: Veronica Mars
July 26, 2016 15:00 - 47 minutesWhat’s up, Marshmallows?! This week we’re coming at you LIVE to tape from the belly of a whale. We’re also talking about Veronica Mars, one of Lia and Jack’s all-time favorite shows! We meet the original party worm Dick Casablancas, do our best Al Pacino impressions, and get some mail from God, our personal mailman - tune in OR ELSE!
Episode 22: Kings
July 10, 2016 22:21 - 46 minutesThis week we're talkin' 'bout KINGS, a show that ran on NBC for one season back in ye ole 2009. We'll also be talkin' 'bout GOD, since this show - a modern-day retelling of the biblical story of King David - was ALL up in that. How would Jack take back the Holy Land? Has Sam been a 65 year old rabbi this entire time? Tune in for answers to these questions and more - coming at you LIVE (to tape) from the penthouse suite of The Plaza Hotel!
Episode 21: Alphas
June 26, 2016 23:08 - 47 minutesThis week on Spoiling Ourselves we watched Syfy Channel's blatant Heroes rip-off Alphas, where we discussed the difference between highly unrealistic "powers" and scientifically plausible "abilities". We also try very hard not to offend people on the autism spectrum, plus Jack absolutely trounced Sam in a crucial game of Who Fuck Who because he actually paid attention while we were watching this garbage excuse for a television show.
Episode 20: Saved By The Bell
June 14, 2016 02:38 - 45 minutesIt's Episode 20! The big two-oh! Il Duce! Tune in this week to get our comprehensive, definitive opinion on oldie and goodie, Saved By The Bell. We'll find out how many women have allegedly slept with Screech, AND how many men he's allegedly stabbed! Plus, we'll read an extra-special mailbag letter from an angry, confused fan of the Portland Sea Dogs. Tune in for all that and more - and don't forget to buy Lia's memoir, I Was A Teenage Bitch, on shelves nationwide next fall! (If you want to ...
Episode 19: Digimon: Digital Monsters (feat. Tyler Corey and Sam Gordon)
June 01, 2016 23:33 - 47 minutesThis week, our episode is hijacked by two visitors from the digital realm! With the help of Tyler Corey and Kurt Handsomehat (Sam Gordon), we're diving into all things Digimon. How do Digimon stack up against Pokémon - and more importantly, Big Bad Beetleborgs? When you're judging a man's attractiveness, does it really all come down to his pubes? TUNE IN - His Lord Diginess COMPELLS you!
Episode 18: Kid Nation
May 15, 2016 16:14 - 37 minutesWe watched the first and last episodes of the first (and only) season of KID NATION, and we're here to break it all down for you. What happens when you leave 40 kids in a ghost town to create their own society without ANY adults? Apparently they'll be mostly responsible, save for a few speed-based masturbation contests. #KIDNATION! #consent.
Episode 17: Battlestar Galactica
May 03, 2016 03:27 - 46 minutesBeep boop beep boop beep boop beep boop beep boop beep boop beep boop beep boop beep boop beep boop CYLONS!!!!!!!! We watched the first and last episodes of Battlestar Galactica, and we are very confused.
Episode 16: Zoey 101
April 18, 2016 01:55 - 43 minutesThis week we're taking you to Pacific Coast Academy to cover everyone's favorite early-2000s Nickelodeon teen drama, Zoey 101! Did you know that one of Zoey's friends is a mad scientist, whose inventions often bend the laws of time and space? Is it appropriate to keep spare cans of Chef Boyardee in your cleavage? ZOEY & CHASE 4 EVA, YOU BUTTHEADS!!!!!!!
Episode 15: Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
April 05, 2016 03:30 - 44 minutesEver wondered what was up with that Terminator show on Fox? We watched the first and last episodes, so we'll give you the full picture. Did you know this show starred Lena Headey, who plays Cersei on Game of Thrones? Did you know that Summer Glau was brought into this world to be every nerd's wet dream? Why does everyone keep wasting their bullets on UNSTOPPABLE MACHINES? Tune in for all this and more!
Episode 14: Power Rangers
March 20, 2016 18:16 - 44 minutesGo Go Power Rangers!!! This week we're talking about the first installment in the Power Rangers saga - Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. Why do the Rangers get their power from dinosaurs? Just how racist was this show? Will Sam convince us that Big Bad Beetleborgs was truly a better program? Tune in for all that and more!
Episode 13: Glee
March 07, 2016 23:18 - 43 minutesTune in this week for our thoughts on GLEE, a show we all agree was quite Lohan-esque in its spectacular, fiery fall from grace. Under which circumstances did GLEE cover "Thong Song"? Under which circumstances is it appropriate to go commando? Please write in and let CJ know, because he's a little confused on the subject.
Episode 12: Jersey Shore
February 09, 2016 04:55 - 44 minutesFist pump! Fist pump! GTL! Tune in this week for our comprehensive, scholarly analysis of a show Sam gives 10 out of 10 hats.
Episode 11: The X-Files
January 25, 2016 02:55 - 42 minutesHot on the heels of the X-Files reboot, we're back to give you our all-encompassing, thorough and detailed analysis of the original show! Which one is Mulder and which one is Scully? Would we probe on the first date? What kind of sandwich would an alien prefer? Tune in for all that and more!
Episode 10: Full House
January 07, 2016 02:41 - 39 minutesThis week on Spoiling Ourselves we take on the big kahuna of the sitcom world, Full House. How does this classic sitcom hold up under our judgmental eye in light of it’s upcoming reboot on Netflix? How the hell should we know - we only watched the first and last episodes!
Episode 9: Hannah Montana (feat. Tyler Corey)
January 07, 2016 02:40 - 45 minutesStrap in for another episode of Spoiling Ourselves, with special guest Tyler Corey! This week we tackle the incandescent Miley Cyrus star-vehicle, Hannah Montana. Also, Tyler wrote the theme song. Nine cheers - in three sets of three cheers - for Tyler.
Episode 8: Gossip Girl
January 07, 2016 02:40 - 39 minutesIn this episode of Spoiling Ourselves, the Men of the Sea try to figure out who was behind Gossip Girl, both the TV show and the website that exists within the TV show. Turns out it was The CW (through the grace of teen drama TITAN Josh Schwartz) and Dan Humphrey, respectively. Not very exciting, we know, but it didn’t take us long to figure out.
Episode 7: House
January 07, 2016 02:39 - 37 minutesThis week we watch HOUSE, get our first mailbag submission, and drink our pain away (happy birthday, Jack!).
Episode 6: Kyle XY (feat. Matt Braly)
January 07, 2016 02:38 - 41 minutesOn a very special episode of spoiling ourselves, the gang is joined by longtime friend and part-time vagabond Matt Braly to discuss Kyle XY, the hit show on ABC about the boy with no belly button! Tune in to find out what kind of belly button each of the hosts has, plus also other interesting things?
Episode 5: Sex and the City
January 07, 2016 02:36 - 43 minutesHot off the presses, it’s the 5th episode of Spoiling Ourselves! This week, we’re asking all the important questions about Sex and the City. Should it have been called “Sex in the City”? Is CJ qualified to tell you how to raise your children? Tune in for all that and more!
Episode 4: Entourage
January 07, 2016 02:34 - 41 minutesIn this episode we talk about HBO’s hit show Entourage, CJ does a Mike Tyson impression that everyone really loves, and we desperately go looking for sponsorship so that we can continue to feed our families.
Episode 3: Buffy the Vampire Slayer
January 07, 2016 02:32 - 34 minutesAaaaaaand it’s the third episode of Spoiling Ourselves! This week, we’re telling you all you need to know about Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Check out this hot word vomit!
Episode 2: Heroes
January 07, 2016 02:28 - 34 minutesHere’s the second episode of Spoiling Ourselves, the show where Men of the Sea (CJ, Sam, Lia and Jack) provide the most “definitive” “analysis” of “the greatest television shows” of “all time” – after watching only the first and last episodes of each series. This time, we're discussing the bright-burning star that was Heroes.
Episode 1: Friends
January 07, 2016 02:26 - 40 minutesHere’s the first episode of Spoiling Ourselves, the show where Men of the Sea (CJ, Sam, Lia and Jack) provide the most “definitive” “analysis” of “the greatest television shows” of “all time” – after watching only the first and last episodes of each series. Kicking it off with the hit TV classic: Friends.