How To Manage Stress When You Go On A Date With Mary Balfour

When you successfully asked somebody out on a date? How do you make the process a good adventure rather than a cataclysmic catastrophe?

In this episode of Serial Stress Killer Podcast, Chris chats with Mary Balfour, a top dating guru in the UK, about acing your first date. First dates are a make or break for every single pair out there looking for some chemistry. Learn how to mitigate stress before, during, and after your first date. Mary promises that the strategies she shares will improve your dating game.

If you ask why your Mr Maybe or Ms Maybe haven’t contacted you yet for a second date, then make sure to listen in since Mary discusses the top no-no’s – that we hope you haven’t done – during first dates. There will also be tips for first-timers, especially flirting, one of the most essential skills in dating. The dating world can be challenging to get into so now’s the time to observe, listen, and learn from the expert.

KEY TAKEAWAYS
Even people who claim they know all about love and dating or who are confident about their conversational skills can break into pieces when he goes on a first date with someone. Stress might come in when we worry too much of the outcome of the first date.
Mary has worked with tens of thousands of people regarding dating. She has seen ever since what and whatnots of the dating world. It’s easy for her now to see the outcome of a person’s dating move.
Tips when you plan the first date.

Set the stage for the ultimate performance. Choose a beautiful place where you can talk and hear each other. This is to make sure you don’t get stressed by the environment during your first date.
Texting is the best way of arranging a date. In this way, you reserve all possible small talks when you meet.
Your first date has to be short. It becomes disastrous when it gets too long. Finish it a little earlier than expected. Keep them on their toes leaving them to be more curious about you.
Another thing that might bring stress is when you talk about yourself or listen to someone talk about himself. As much as possible, there should be balance, truthfulness, and no expectations during an exchange of stories, ideas, and opinions.
Flirting is normal if you want to build chemistry. It’s all about you and another person feeling good about themselves. Use flattery, playfulness, and curiosity.

Flirting needs practice. You can even learn it through flirting courses. Everyone is capable of flirting.
According to Mary, one thing that changed everything is not technology, it’s contraception. Multiple dating became a thing. She also notices that people have set their eyes on completing their checklist of what makes their perfect partner. That is why most dates don’t reach second dates.
Valentine’s Day may not be the most romantic day for everyone. It’s also a very commercialised day. Though, it’s a good reminder of love, affection, and friendship.

BEST MOMENTS
“The stress level or problem perhaps to behave inappropriately or in a way that might sabotage the date – this can happen often.”
“Dating is actually stressful because of your first date particularly is like an exam. You know you’re on show. Their expectations which can be very high are nothing quite realistic on both sides… which can get in the way of people behaving and interacting naturally.”
“Once people start talking about problems on a date, it does spell disaster. You’ve got to keep the first date really light-hearted and a bit flirty; small talk, not big talk.”
“When people fall in love, it’s when they’re really relaxed.”

VALUABLE RESOURCES
Marriages Are Made in Bond Street: True Stories from a 1940s Marriage Bureau by Penrose Halson
The 4-Hour Workweek by Tim Ferriss
Serial Stress Killer on iTunes

ABOUT THE GUEST

Mary Balfour is one of the most experienced dating gurus’ in the UK, running her multi-award-winning, London-based matchmaking agency Drawing Down the Moon for over 30 years. 

Author of Smart Dating: how to find your man (shortly out in its third edition) Mary also shares her field-tested dating strategies and tips via her YouTube Dating Success Channel. 

As a seasoned guest of TV and radio, Mary talks with passion about the wider issues of relationships and the dating industry.
Official Website: marybalfour.com
drawingdownthemoon.co.uk
Smart Dating: How to Find Your Man by Mary Balfour

ABOUT THE HOST

After many years of dealing (badly) with personal stress for over 20 years, Chris Hackett is on a mission to help people understand and overcome stress and anxiety by tackling the problem head-on.

CONTACT METHOD
Contact the show:

https://serialstresskiller.com
https://www.facebook.com/groups/serialstresskiller
https://www.instagram.com/serialstresskiller
Support the show - https://www.patreon.com/serialstresskiller
What’s been your favourite episode so far? Connect with Chris to let him know - [email protected].

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

When you successfully asked somebody out on a date? How do you make the process a good adventure rather than a cataclysmic catastrophe?

In this episode of Serial Stress Killer Podcast, Chris chats with Mary Balfour, a top dating guru in the UK, about acing your first date. First dates are a make or break for every single pair out there looking for some chemistry. Learn how to mitigate stress before, during, and after your first date. Mary promises that the strategies she shares will improve your dating game.

If you ask why your Mr Maybe or Ms Maybe haven’t contacted you yet for a second date, then make sure to listen in since Mary discusses the top no-no’s – that we hope you haven’t done – during first dates. There will also be tips for first-timers, especially flirting, one of the most essential skills in dating. The dating world can be challenging to get into so now’s the time to observe, listen, and learn from the expert.

KEY TAKEAWAYS

Even people who claim they know all about love and dating or who are confident about their conversational skills can break into pieces when he goes on a first date with someone. Stress might come in when we worry too much of the outcome of the first date.
Mary has worked with tens of thousands of people regarding dating. She has seen ever since what and whatnots of the dating world. It’s easy for her now to see the outcome of a person’s dating move.
Tips when you plan the first date.

Set the stage for the ultimate performance. Choose a beautiful place where you can talk and hear each other. This is to make sure you don’t get stressed by the environment during your first date.
Texting is the best way of arranging a date. In this way, you reserve all possible small talks when you meet.
Your first date has to be short. It becomes disastrous when it gets too long. Finish it a little earlier than expected. Keep them on their toes leaving them to be more curious about you.

Another thing that might bring stress is when you talk about yourself or listen to someone talk about himself. As much as possible, there should be balance, truthfulness, and no expectations during an exchange of stories, ideas, and opinions.
Flirting is normal if you want to build chemistry. It’s all about you and another person feeling good about themselves. Use flattery, playfulness, and curiosity.

Flirting needs practice. You can even learn it through flirting courses. Everyone is capable of flirting.

According to Mary, one thing that changed everything is not technology, it’s contraception. Multiple dating became a thing. She also notices that people have set their eyes on completing their checklist of what makes their perfect partner. That is why most dates don’t reach second dates.
Valentine’s Day may not be the most romantic day for everyone. It’s also a very commercialised day. Though, it’s a good reminder of love, affection, and friendship.

BEST MOMENTS

“The stress level or problem perhaps to behave inappropriately or in a way that might sabotage the date – this can happen often.”
“Dating is actually stressful because of your first date particularly is like an exam. You know you’re on show. Their expectations which can be very high are nothing quite realistic on both sides… which can get in the way of people behaving and interacting naturally.”
“Once people start talking about problems on a date, it does spell disaster. You’ve got to keep the first date really light-hearted and a bit flirty; small talk, not big talk.”
“When people fall in love, it’s when they’re really relaxed.”

VALUABLE RESOURCES

Marriages Are Made in Bond Street: True Stories from a 1940s Marriage Bureau by Penrose Halson
The 4-Hour Workweek by Tim Ferriss
Serial Stress Killer on iTunes

ABOUT THE GUEST

Mary Balfour is one of the most experienced dating gurus’ in the UK, running her multi-award-winning, London-based matchmaking agency Drawing Down the Moon for over 30 years. 

Author of Smart Dating: how to find your man (shortly out in its third edition) Mary also shares her field-tested dating strategies and tips via her YouTube Dating Success Channel. 

As a seasoned guest of TV and radio, Mary talks with passion about the wider issues of relationships and the dating industry.

Official Website: marybalfour.com
drawingdownthemoon.co.uk
Smart Dating: How to Find Your Man by Mary Balfour

ABOUT THE HOST

After many years of dealing (badly) with personal stress for over 20 years, Chris Hackett is on a mission to help people understand and overcome stress and anxiety by tackling the problem head-on.

CONTACT METHOD

Contact the show:

https://serialstresskiller.com
https://www.facebook.com/groups/serialstresskiller
https://www.instagram.com/serialstresskiller

Support the show - https://www.patreon.com/serialstresskiller
What’s been your favourite episode so far? Connect with Chris to let him know - [email protected].

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.