Rebuilding 016 Friendship

A man killed himself the other day.

Oh, how sad. Did he have a family?

I would usually ask when someone delivered this all too frequent news. But this one was different. This man I knew his name was Jeremy. I am sad to say I didn't know him as well as I would have liked. I was thought he could be a good friend. We belong to the same group that served other men.

He was a leader and a great example to all he lifted everyone he met. His smile was infectious. I met his wife at one event. They were a perfect match, handsome with beautiful, happy and healthy. He was a father. I met his son. He had three other kids, but I didn't know that until I saw it on Facebook. He drove a nice truck and he had a boat. He golfed a lot. I knew he did something in construction, but we never talked about it. I would describe him as a man's man. He was present at every event we held except for a recent meeting when he sent his regrets because it was his wife's birthday picture, perfect life, and now he's dead. He always asked everyone how they were doing, and he listened intently while they shared. I don't remember asking him how he was doing.

I mean like really asking. It was obvious that he was great. At least I thought so. I don't know what happened or what went through his head to make him think this was a good idea. I suppose. I never will. What I do know is that I didn't ask. I did slap him on the back as he talked about his latest golf trip. We talked at length about the men in his small mastermind group and how they were doing. We talked about all the effort he was putting into pulling everyone out of their isolation. We talked about him taking on bigger leadership role with our men's group, but we never talked about him.

I work with dozens of men and I'm a good listener. I asked tough questions that others shy away from. I have made a difference in many lives because I care. I am committed more than ever to be the hand for my brother's reaching through the dark. But with Jeremy, I didn't ask. I'm not trying to say that I could have said something that would have prevented this tragedy, but there are so many of you that I am much closer to that I can make a difference with. And there are those in your life that you can make a difference with. On the flip side, when I ask you how you're doing, like really ask you, please just tell me the truth. I promise to do the same.