Real Feels
50 episodes - English - Latest episode: about 2 months ago - ★★★★★ - 24 ratingsIn a society where we are constantly re-defining what it means to be a man, Brad Gage brings you a podcast that asks guests to be vulnerable about masculinity and gender issues - looking at who they are now, who they aim to be, and the space in-between.
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Episodes
Charles Bukowski: The Problematic Poet
March 12, 2024 14:45 - 9 minutes - 8.71 MBCharles Bukowski was one of the most famous and revered poets of the 20th century, but did his attitude and actions toward women negatively influence a generation of men? And is it possible to separate the art from the problematic artist? Host Brad Gage tries his best to do just that and fails mid-podcast to find that my moral threshold doesn’t allow him to admire people who demean and abuse women (no matter how much he loves their poetry). Hosted, Edited, and Produced by Brad Gage Logo...
How to Not Be a Creep
February 20, 2024 14:00 - 10 minutes - 9.97 MBWhat makes a guy a "creep"? And how can you make sure women aren't calling you one? While creepiness is subjective, it is the number one description to stay away from in dating or your social life. Being called a creep is one of the worst things for your reputation. Brad Gage takes time to figure out what are the traits of a “creep”, some actual examples of creepiness to give context, and some ideas on how to not become one. Hosted, Edited, and Produced by Brad Gage Logo by Nolan Fabric...
A Male Platonic Friendship "Dating" App with Marc Milberg of Olley
October 18, 2023 13:45 - 28 minutes - 25.9 MBHost Brad Gage talks to Marc Milberg - founder of Olley, an app for men to connect with new friends in their area based on personality, interests, & more. Basically what they’ve built is a friendship-finding app that functions similarly to dating apps, but it’s all platonic. Studies show that in 2021, 15% of men reported having no close friends, compared to only 3% in 1990. This is a fivefold increase since 1990. Especially for anyone who just recently moved to a new city, finding male frien...
Patriarchy Blues and Intersectionality with author Fred Joseph
October 03, 2023 14:00 - 35 minutes - 32.9 MBBrad talks to 2 time New York Times bestselling author Frederick Joseph about intersectional feminism, how people can be both oppressed and privileged at the same time, why he could beat Joe Rogan’s ass. Plus, they dive into the historical idea of women seen as property. Fred has written the sometimes-banned books "The Black Friend" and "Patriarchy Blues", as well as "Better Than We Found It" and "Black Panther: Wakanda Forever - The Courage to Dream". On this episode, Brad got to do so...
Men's Dating Coaches and the Modern Manosphere with Michael Le
July 21, 2023 12:30 - 34 minutes - 32.2 MBBrad talks to Michael Le (aka "Dr. Silk"), a men's coach, about how conversational artistry is pretty much the most important thing in talking to women. Michael talks about his emphasis on empathy, curiosity, and listening when it comes to engaging with women, or anybody successfully. Brad's past episode about Pickup Artists and YouTube Dating Coaches caught Michael's attention, and the two talk about thoughtful, modern tactics in dating, as well as an explaination of the Andrew Tate pheno...
Millennial and Gen X Talk About Masculinity and Addiction - with Tom Matlack
May 24, 2023 13:52 - 32 minutes - 59.9 MBBrad talks to writer, entrepreneur, and guy who helps men get sober - Tom Matlack. Tom is one of the authors of the book The Good Men Project: Real Stories from the Front Lines of Modern Manhood and you should definitely check out his writing by searching his name in Substack. What starts as a conversation of masculinity perspectives from a millennial guy versus a Gen X dude, turns into a deep assessment of life as a recovering alcoholic and money-obsessed individual. I’m so grateful to To...
The Lie That Self-Objectification is Empowering with Dr. Caroline Heldman
March 29, 2023 15:10 - 31 minutes - 29.1 MBOn today’s episode, Brad is talking to Dr. Caroline Heldman - a professor of Critical Theory and Social Justice at Occidental College in Los Angeles. She is also Executive Director of The Representation Project and has been featured in some of the most important documentaries on the subject of gender studies including Miss Representation and The Mask You Live In. Caroline is a friend who has been instrumental in guiding Brad through his journey of exploration on the subjects of modern masc...
Saying the Things Men Aren't Supposed to Say
March 22, 2023 15:00 - 3 minutes - 3.5 MBI think a lot of guys feel the exact same way as me. So why don't they talk about it openly? Because the patriarchy and modern masculinity tell us that if we do, we're breaking the bro code and we are the worst thing imaginable - feminine. But it's not gendered to feel emotions, it's human. Written and Hosted and Edited by Brad Gage Subscribe for more conversations around modern masculinity and the inner lives of men.
How I Stopped Watching Tubesite Porn
March 15, 2023 15:00 - 5 minutes - 5.17 MBResearch shows that tubesite porn use is leading men to be less engaged in real relationships, have more erectile dysfunction, and have less motivation to make human connections. Plus, the main porn industry is fraught with abuse and inequity. This is not a deep dive about the injustices of porn, while there are many. This is a practical, reasonable guide for guys who want to ween off of a genuine compulsion. Written and Hosted and Edited by Brad Gage Subscribe for more conversations aro...
The Importance of Male Friendship
March 09, 2023 15:00 - 4 minutes - 3.85 MBGuys, for the sake of your health, check in on the men in your life. Lean into the camaraderie you have in your community. And if you don’t have it, be brave and do the work to go get them. At least making male friendship connections should be a little less hard than dating. Written and Hosted and Edited by Brad Gage Subscribe for more conversations around modern masculinity and the inner lives of men.
How Prisoners Taught Me Feminism
January 11, 2023 14:00 - 7 minutes - 7.06 MBThis is a story about a group of the most traditionally masculine men possible - convicts, felons, and murderers - talking about feminism. Brad was inspired by the documentary "The Feminist on Cell Block Y" about program that helps teach prisoners about toxic masculinity, patriarchy, and how they can reach their personal goals in healthier ways. The film is a testament to rehabilitation, education, and how love within a community can heal the wounds we have within ourselves. Written and Ho...
Why I Won't Watch HBO's Euphoria
January 05, 2023 15:00 - 6 minutes - 5.68 MBEuphoria is a groundbreaking TV series in a lot of ways, but it wasn’t until I understood how the show sexualizes teenagers that I realized why I had always felt uncomfortable at the idea of watching it. I explain how much the things we watch actually affect our view of the world, and why images of sexy teens can be harmful. Written, Produced, Edited, and Hosted by Brad Gage READ the Jessica Valenti piece "The Euphoria Problem" https://jessica.substack.com/p/the-euphoria-problem?s=r
Why The Rock is the World's Most Famous Feminist
December 20, 2022 15:00 - 10 minutes - 9.55 MBDwayne "The Rock" Johnson is arguably the biggest movie star in the world, and if you pay close enough attention, he's also the biggest feminist in Hollywood. Brad dives into The Rock's life, love, children, TV show, and more to unravel why Johnson is one of those unique famous men who believes in real equality (which is also why he's probably running for president). Written and Hosted and Edited by Brad Gage Subscribe for more conversations around modern masculinity and the inner lives ...
An Introduction to Restorative Justice with Sonya Shah
December 13, 2022 13:57 - 29 minutes - 26.9 MBSonya Shah is someone Brad has admired from her appearances on other podcasts for her deep expertise around restorative justice, and all forms of healing justice that represent an alternative to the punitive, and many times racially insensitive systems of justice that currently preside in this country. Sonya is the Co-Executive Director of Ahimsa Collective is an organization that works to address harm in ways that foster wholeness for everyone. Their goals are to replace systems of punishme...
Why Large Age Gap Relationships Can Feel Gross
August 08, 2022 12:32 - 18 minutes - 17.1 MBIs age just a number? Using celebrities, TV, and pop culture, Brad Gage digs into the psychology of age-gap relationships, why older men and younger women are attracted to each other, how it can sometimes result in an unequal power dynamic, and what can be done to help these relationships thrive. Includes analysis of age-gap May-December romances, Evolution Theory, Gender Roles, "Daddy Issues", plus Dane Cook and Jerry Seinfeld dating teenagers. It'll all make sense when you listen. Writ...
What Happens After #MeToo? Restorative Justice
July 18, 2022 15:00 - 6 minutes - 6.4 MBWhat should come after the #MeToo era? Restorative Justice is a process that hands the power to the victim after harm is done, while still working in collaboration with the person who did the harm. This way all those involved can release some of the shame, anger, or secrecy surrounding the incident. Because sometimes victims need something more than what law and order can provide. Written, Edited, and Performed by Brad Gage Music by Russell Henson Check out Russell's music here: https://...
Male Sex Coach Cam Fraser Talking Porn, Masturbation, and Communication
April 26, 2022 12:00 - 50 minutes - 47 MBCam Fraser is Australia's leading men's sex coach who you can find through his engaging, thoughtful, and frequently funny Instagram videos. He speaks to men about everything from masturbation, to porn, to myths about male sex organs. Luckily, we have become friends, and today’s episode is where I get to ask him all my juicy questions about taboos, if porn is energetically cheating on your partner, and how men can help themselves take the shame out of porn, and sex and masturbation. Cam is re...
How Pickup Artists Ruined Dating
September 03, 2021 09:00 - 18 minutes - 17.1 MBPickup Artists might seem old, corny, and pretty ridiculous to most people, but since their mid-2000’s rise in popularity, the philosophy of THE GAME has influenced a generation of young men to manipulate their way to sex. With pickup gurus like Ross Jeffries, Neil Strauss, and Mystery teaching men for decades how to cut the female experience out of dating, they've made a lasting influence on the minds of modern single guys. Brad breaks down the “rules”, the mindset, and the emotional discon...
Amanda Crew on Eating Disorders and Sexual Trauma
April 08, 2021 13:18 - 43 minutes - 40.2 MBAmanda Crew (HBO's Silicon Valley) and Brad have been friends a long time, but recently bonded over each of them finding movements they are truly passionate about. For Brad, it's reframing toxic masculinity, and for her, it's re-educating people around eating disorders. She's been vocal about it in her work with Project Heal, but in this conversation, we get to the genesis of her journey through anorexia. Amanda also gets frank about her own experiences with sexual trauma, providing advice...
Kaitlyn Hollysmith and Her Story of Trans Visibility
March 31, 2021 15:28 - 37 minutes - 34.3 MBToday’s episode is mostly a story - one both personal to me and educational. It’s with Kaitlyn Hollysmith, a lawyer, a mother, a wife, and a friend...who back in my college fraternity days - was my little brother. Kaitlyn is trans. Here on the show, we reconnect after 10 years of that normal drift apart that happens after you leave college, but she saw what I was doing with Real Feels, and reached out. Her story about finding who she really was, how she got close to committing suicide, an...
Joe Rogan Doesn't Understand Toxic Masculinity
June 30, 2020 10:00 - 12 minutes - 11.4 MBJoe Rogan has one major blindspot - his own toxic masculinity. While his open-mindedness on politics, relationships, drugs, hunting, and other social subjects is part of why he's amassed millions of subscribers (and a new $100 million Spotify contract), Rogan rejects the idea that men are conditioned in a way that is harmful to women and themselves. Brad Gage looks at the Joe Rogan Experience podcast as a whole, showing why Rogan would be even more successful if he embraced his emotional, em...
Ep 25 - Sarah Moshman
May 27, 2020 11:00 - 51 minutes - 47.4 MBLike the women in her documentaries, director Sarah Moshman is on a mission. Her work is centered firmly around female empowerment - not just because she recognizes the injustices around her, but also to give her daughter a future with equity, integrity, and real possibility. Sarah’s ability to turn her message into her career makes her one of my personal role models, and her passion for communicating the female experience is infectious - as you’ll hear in our chat. Sarah and I talk about th...
Ep 24 - Miguel Ferrer
May 19, 2020 12:00 - 46 minutes - 42.9 MBMy friend Miguel Ferrer works internationally as a writer and director for feature films, music videos, and commercials. An exciting life as a storyteller, he could only have realized because his parents emigrated him from Venezuela to Miami when he was a young boy. His heritage is his pride, though Miguel is not afraid to critique the types of toxic male traits that permeate Latino culture. We break down ways to curb macho bullying, how being handsome doesn’t have as much of an effect on wo...
Ep 23 - Dustin Milligan (from Schitt's Creek & RuPaul's Celebrity Drag Race)
May 13, 2020 11:00 - 44 minutes - 41.2 MBDustin Milligan is a man very in touch with his masculinity, and if you caught him recently as one of the winners on RuPaul’s Celebrity Drag Race - you’d see he’s clearly in touch with his femininity just as much. You might know Dustin from TV shows like Schitt’s Creek or Silicon Valley, but the guy I know above all is one who genuinely looks at the impact his life is making...and a dude who is just filled to the brim with puns. You can see the proof on his hilarious instagram account. Dusti...
The Surprising Masculinity of Mister Rogers
April 15, 2020 11:30 - 9 minutes - 8.44 MBWhat does it mean to be a man? In his own particular way, Mister Rogers represented traits that traditionally masculine men pride themselves in - power, strength, confidence, and success. And his tactics are just what the modern man needs to maneuver personal relationships in the 21st century. Special thanks to everyone who had a part in the making of “Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood”, “Won’t You Be My Neighbor”, and “A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood”
How to Handle Social Media During Quarantine
April 08, 2020 16:55 - 6 minutes - 6.44 MBHow are you feeling when you go to bed during quarantine? A lot of us fill our newfound free time scrolling social media feeds because they give us a sense of control. But what if you gave yourself a chance to take advantage of the extra time? What if you finally got around to all the things you never could get to and felt proud of how you spent your quarantine? Brad has some thoughts and tips to help you think about what you can do. Special thanks to Allison Mandell INSIGHT TIMER Manife...
Ep 23 - How to Handle Social Media During Quarantine
April 08, 2020 16:55 - 6 minutes - 6.44 MBHow are you feeling when you go to bed during quarantine? A lot of us fill our newfound free time scrolling social media feeds because it gives us a sense of control. But what if you gave yourself a chance to take advantage of all this extra space? What if you finally got around to all the things you never had time for and felt proud of how you spent your coronavirus quarantine? Special Thanks to Allison Mandell INSIGHT TIMER Manifestation meditation http://insig.ht/gm_654
Ep 22 - Caron Clancey
March 25, 2020 10:00 - 52 minutes - 48.4 MBCaron Clancey is a writer, director, and eco-conscious hero. And I say “hero” because she wields her power in the way that every one of us can - with our wallets. She makes choices every day, no matter how small, to lower her carbon footprint and help heal the environment. And I think it’s about time that we recognize how exciting it is to make big changes every day. Caron and I talk here about her love for dirt, the helpful earth-nerd tricks she shares online, and how disconnected masculini...
Ep 21 - Evan Watkins
March 19, 2020 10:00 - 48 minutes - 44.5 MBEvan Watkins is an actor, guitarist, and guy who has made enough mistakes in his romantic life to know how important listening is. And it shows. What is lovely about this episode is that Evan was down to attack some big questions about masculinity with humility, and an awareness that while there are a lot of external pressures to be a certain type of guy, real manliness comes from having empathy for women and not pushing your own expectations on a situation. Listening, learning and striving ...
Ep 20 - Lisa Schwartz
March 11, 2020 07:03 - 45 minutes - 42.4 MBLisa Schwartz is an actress, producer, and personality who built a career on being herself for an audience of 2 million subscribers on YouTube. And being herself is about asking people to be empowered by the imperfect, and leaning into the quirks of being your age - which she did with her 2019 memoir “Thirty Life Crisis”. After going through a very public breakup a few years ago, she has finally found herself in a relationship that gives her peace, balance, and someone to lay on the bathroom...
Ep 19 - Steve Levy
March 05, 2020 08:21 - 29 minutes - 27.5 MBSteve Levy is a guy who doesn’t completely feel like he’s grown up yet, and he’s okay with that. As an associate producer of the hit Adult Swim show “Rick and Morty”, he’s worked hard as hell to succeed in an environment where he can immerse himself in the world of the movies and TV his father showed him as a young boy. And sometimes that immersion has affected his dating like, as you’ll hear. Today - we talk about what it was like growing up as a sensitive kid, the frat-like climate at his ...
Ep 18 - Lola Blanc
February 19, 2020 17:12 - 47 minutes - 43.8 MBActress, singer, and director Lola Blanc is currently breaking out of her persona. After spending much of her adult life focused on pop music stardom, she’s now honing in on being more the version of herself that is...herself. And part of that is publicly sharing her perspectives on subjects like Mormonism, (which took up much of her childhood), sexism (which took up much of her music career), and allowing people space to make mistakes and grow (which is part of her mission now). Her coming ...
Ep 17 - Philip Wang
February 12, 2020 11:00 - 48 minutes - 44.7 MBPhilip Wang feels like he’s graduating into the next phase of his life, and it’s easy to agree with him. Along with his team at Wong Fu Productions, Philip built a YouTube channel with a fanbase of over 3 million people. Also - within the past year, he realized his dreams of opening a restaurant (bopomofo cafe), AND proposing to his girlfriend Helen. It all seems perfect, but, of course, it took a TON of inner work to get here. As you’ll see, Philip still feels impatient for what he can see ...
Ep 16 - Iain McDonald
January 29, 2020 12:00 - 51 minutes - 47.5 MBIain McDonald is a guy who Brad recently met and instantly wanted on the podcast. Not only is his energy calming and empathetic, but he also is very clearly hungry for knowledge and connection in a way that's contagious. He’s an actor and photographer, but as you’ll hear in the show, he is above all a curious guy, unafraid of questioning the reality we live in. I wade into the deep end with him about spirituality, metaphysics, technology, and the importance of asking “why”.
Ep 15 - Andree Vermeulen
January 23, 2020 18:15 - 47 minutes - 43.3 MBActor Andree Vermeulen is accomplishing a bunch of major life shifts in a very short time. Within the past 5 months she’s gotten pregnant, engaged, and moved into a new house. That’s...a lot. And she faces the challenges of her transitioning life through the practices of shifting her perspective to empowerment and connecting with who she really is on a daily basis. Today, she sat down with me to talk about how releasing her grip on the idea of "plans" helped get her role on the TV show "Angi...
Ep 14 - Lee Newton
January 16, 2020 12:00 - 51 minutes - 47.4 MBActor/writer/funny person Lee Newton is having a challenging moment. It’s one of heartbreak as well as new beginnings. After almost two years working with her comedy group - the Valleyfolk - on a vibrant and funny YouTube channel (as well as the NBC comedy TV show “Bring the Funny”) Lee was surprised to learn she had been terminated from the company she helped create. On this episode, Brad and Lee chat about empowerment, loss, resilience, comedy, and lessons she has learned being a woman in ...
Ep 13 - Janine Oda
January 09, 2020 10:30 - 39 minutes - 36.4 MBJanine Oda is an actor, host, and friend, who in this moment is navigating her tendency to say "yes" to everything as well as publicly representing her faith in a community that's not always as accepting of it. She also has a loving boyfriend of 15 years, and you know what - she IS tired of people asking her if she’s getting married. She almost didn’t want to do my podcast because she was sick of talking about it. But, what resists persists, and we luckily got her on the show to get a little...
Ep 12 - Amalia Levari
December 18, 2019 12:12 - 50 minutes - 46.7 MBOn a slightly different episode of the podcast, animation writer and longtime friend Amalia Levari, tells a wonderfully non-spooky ghost story, AND takes the opportunity to ask a question that no one has posed to Brad yet. Why is he doing this show and why isn’t it...funny? Together, the look at Brad's recent spiritual pivot, plus how she deals with wanting to fix everyone’s problems, and why she’s rooting for the survival of humanity. Thank you for listening.
Ep 11 - Chen Tang
December 12, 2019 12:00 - 41 minutes - 38.1 MBPerformer, artist, and one of the stars of Disney’s upcoming live-action “Mulan”, Chen Tang is here to speak his truth. Originally born in China, Chen talks about finding his many selves through the duel life of bouncing back and forth from China to America. Chen talks about spirit, truth, philosophy, and how easy Transcendental Meditation can really be when you just relax and let your brain do the work.
Ep 10 - Jenny Lorenzo
December 04, 2019 12:00 - 40 minutes - 37.2 MBJenny Lorenzo is a hard worker, totally hilarious, and thoroughly filled with anxiety. And she’s not shy about it. Whether it’s her Cuban upbringing in Miami, the drive to support the people around her, or the unending call to feed the content machines of the internet - Jenny is always on the grind. But is work all there is? And how does she handle the pressures of being an internet personality? Thank you for listening to this podcast. Genuinely.
Ep 9 - Shaun Brown
November 20, 2019 12:30 - 41 minutes - 38 MBShaun Brown and Brad are old friends. They've worked together, drank together, and lived together. Today, they spent some time together talking about the important stuff - the brutality of the animal kingdom as seen through instagram videos, true love, and the challenge of being a sensitive guy in the modern age. Thank you for listening!
Ep 7 - Shaun Brown
November 20, 2019 12:30 - 41 minutes - 38 MBShaun Brown and Brad are old friends. They've worked together, drank together, and lived together. Today, they spent some time together talking about the important stuff - the brutality of the animal kingdom as seen through instagram videos, true love, and the challenge of being a sensitive guy in the modern age. Thank you for listening!
Ep 8 - Beth Rowe
November 13, 2019 12:30 - 37 minutes - 34.8 MBComedian, actor and writer Beth Rowe is getting married. Well, was about to get married when we recorded this. She’s since then actually done it (congrats Beth) but here she talks about the anxieties, the politics and the utter joy of committing to her life with her best friend. We also talked about how living near Columbine High School affected her view on guns, and how her version of meditation is getting her nails done. We balance the dark with the light here on Real Feels...
Ep 7 - Ricky Carmona
November 06, 2019 12:00 - 34 minutes - 31.9 MBComedian Ricky Carmona is grateful for many things - including getting to write jokes for a TV show after learning how to speak English watching TV shows. He talks about doing standup in Chicago before moving to LA in his mid-30’s, which he admits is not the usual story. We caught him in a good spot! Sending a genuine THANK YOU for listening.
Ep 6 - JJ Duncan
October 30, 2019 10:00 - 49 minutes - 45.9 MBJJ Duncan is a writer, a mom, a seeker, a TV producer, and someone who has been dealt a hell of a 2019. Dive in as she runs us through her takes on identity, the male gaze, spiritual growth, and how she dealt with her son's cancer. It's a wonderful lesson in not getting trapped in a persona. If you would like to donate toward her son, Mason's, road to recovery - go to https://www.gofundme.com/f/support-masons-road-to-recovery
Ep 5 - Ted Marsden
October 16, 2019 09:00 - 32 minutes - 30 MBTed talks about feeling activated - finding a cause and putting energy towards it. Whether it be his collaborative filmmaking, his feminine energy or political campaigns. He drops the simple, yet welcome reminder about how “knowing more” in politics isn’t as helpful as “doing things”. Thanks for listening!
Ep 4 - Warren Burke
October 09, 2019 06:57 - 50 minutes - 46.1 MBWarren brings his dynamic energy to the podcast, opening up about his gratitude practices, how he deals with people who doubt his positivity, and the inspiring story of when he went against all reason and moved to Los Angeles. Today, we try to answer the question he poses “Misery loves company, but what does happiness love?”
Episode 3 - Lindsay Ames
October 02, 2019 15:38 - 26 minutes - 24.4 MBLindsay opens up about the anxiety of constant self-promotion on social media, how people engage more with photos of her face than her life, and never allowing herself to get bored. Also - thank YOU for listening to this podcast.
Episode 2 - Hunter Cope
September 27, 2019 10:43 - 43 minutes - 39.6 MBHunter opens up about his anxiety-fighting rituals, his very hippie parents, and tapping into the more playful side of his spirit in the wake of sobriety. Thank YOU for listening to this podcast.
Episode 1 - Atsuko Okatsuka
September 11, 2019 03:38 - 37 minutes - 34.7 MBWelcome to our first episode where Atsuko opens up to Brad about being her husband's boss, the meditative process of writing jokes while eating, and her newfound interest in astrology. And I want to say to YOU reading this - genuinely - thank you for listening.