Punch Drunk TV Ep. 55: We Be Some Sexy A$$ Bitches

All the news, all the TV shows -- let's just cut to the chase here... "Twin Peaks" is back and nothing else really matters. I mean, does it? Let's just get into it, shall we?

NEWS:

"Twin Peaks" debuted to just 506,000 live viewers when it returned on Sunday night. However, the majority of the episodes’ viewers watched the first four episodes online through the Showtime app or on Hulu, Amazon or Youtube -- bringing Showtime the biggest record weekend (and single day) in subscriber signups in the network’s history. HBO has finally confirmed there are just 13 episodes left in the "Game of Thrones" series. Originally, they left open the possibility of more episodes being developed but now it’s finalized: Season 7 will have seven episodes, Season 8 will have only 6. TJ Miller won’t return to "Silicon Valley" for Season 5 which is a damn shame HBO and Jon Stewart have scrapped their planned short-form animated news project which was originally set to premiere during the 2016 election. Saying in a joint statement, "We all thought the project had great potential but there were technical issues in terms of production and distribution that proved too difficult given the quick turnaround and topical nature of the material. We’re excited to report that we have some future projects together which you will be hearing about in the near future.” Oliver Stone is partnering with Weinstein TV to direct the entire first season of “Guantanamo” --  a that’ll focus specifically on the detainees held in one of the world's most controversial prisons, and those who defend and condemn them. No network is attached as of yet. This is Oliver Stone’s first foray into television. NBC has renewed "Trial & Error" for a second season NBC has canceled "Chicago Justice" after one season Sashir Zamata and Vanessa Bayer are leaving "SNL" Mel Rodriguez and Vera Farmiga will star in an episode of "Philip K. Dick’s Electric Dreams" -- Amazon’s new sci-fi anthology series from Bryan Cranston. “In the episode, a man hangs dead from a lamppost, apparently murdered and inexplicably ignored by passersby, after a politician (Farmiga) makes a shocking statement encouraging violence. When one extraordinarily average man (Rodriguez) dares to question the situation, he becomes an instant target.” Netflix has canceled "The Get Down" after one season The third and final season of Netflix’s "Bloodline" premieres this Friday. Originally, it was to be a five or six season series, but because of Florida’s decision to cut tax incentives for film and TV productions, things became way too expensive to shoot. Instead, the third and final season -- cut down from 13 episodes to 10 -- will premiere May 26 to Netflix. History Channel has ordered a new UFO-themed series from Robert Zemeckis titled, "Blue Book." The story follows a college professor recruited by the Air Force to research paranormal files from the 1950s and '60s, each episode drawing inspiration from actual files for a blend of UFO theories with authentic historical information. Disney has renewed "Andi Mack" for a second season The "Black-ish" spinoff has an official new home - Freeform and an official new name: "College-ish" Lifetime is moving forward with its Robert Durst movie, titled “The Lost Wife of Robert Durst.” David Gillies, vampy star of CW’s “The Originals” will play Durst and Katharine McPhee will play Durst’s first wife Kathie, who mysteriously vanished in 1982. While Durst is currently in jail awaiting trial for the murder of his close friend, journalist Susan Berman, the questions linger as to what really happened to Kathie.

AARON’S LOSER: "Dirty Dancing"

JACK’S LOSER: "Agents of SHIELD"

AARON’S FENCERS: "Better Call Saul" and "Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt"

JACK’S FENCERS: "Neon Joe: Werewolf Hunter," "Bakers vs Fakers," "The Toy Box" and "Handmaid's Tale"

AARON’S WINNERS: "Beerland," "Weediquette," "United Shades of America," "Supernatural," "The Leftovers" and "Twin Peaks"

JACK’S WINNERS: "Master of None," "Casual" and "Anne with an E"

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